Show & Tell
izzy's playlists!
we're not kids anymore.
No title available
Today's Document
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Sweet Seals For You, Always
macklin celebrini has autism
Game of Thrones Daily
KIROKAZE
noise dept.
Keni
JBB: An Artblog!
Mike Driver
Xuebing Du
hello vonnie
blake kathryn
No title available
Cosmic Funnies
cherry valley forever
seen from Malaysia
seen from Egypt
seen from India
seen from United States
seen from Austria
seen from Germany
seen from Spain
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Jamaica
seen from Sweden
seen from Austria
seen from United States
seen from Iraq
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Canada
seen from Maldives
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
@bansheeswithraptors
My back is messed up, I ripped most of the toenail off my big toe and it kills. I have at least one but most likely more, broken rib(s). And I have not had a chance to go to the doc because my work schedule has gotten insane. I'm tired of trying to explain that my body is evil and constantly breaking while trying to murder me too. Stupid Damnit.
My pain is so so out of control that I've chewed off the sides of my tongue. Legit chewed them off, I'm bleeding. But I had no idea I was even doing it because it's fucking cumpolsory. KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT ABOUT YOUR PAIN AND FIGURE OUT HOW TO PAY FOR FUCKING INSURANCE YOU PIECE OF SHIT. That is what I hear when you cough in irritation and my muttered "ow".
I have chewed off all the edges of my goddamn tongue and I didn't know and I can't talk now but I can't go to the hospital because I DONT HAVE FUCKING INSURANCE.
Whatever medicine it is that I take at night that keeps making me super nauseous 🤢 has got to go. I still haven't figured out which one it is despite the fact that I only take 3 out of 4 night meds on any given night.
WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK IS GOING ON WITH MY BACK? MAKE IT STOP.
Oh no. I happen to have a thing for someone I should not have a thing for. This could get me in serious trouble. I'll just hide forever for safety reasons.
I have reached a level of full body physical pain that I cannot even begin to describe or define it. Every inch of me is in agonizing pain, and each pain is different than all the rest. None of them make sense together and I legitimately feel like I might be dying. Sure, it sounds dramatic, but honest to god I have never felt so horrible and miserable in my life and I have lived through hell and back in this short time I've been alive.
But in the last, approximately, 72(ish)hours I have devolved into a tangible form of nothingness and destruction. I am combustion internally and it is leaking out from sheer force and now I find myself imploding and exploding all at once and all the time. The constant state of combustion has left me wishing I would truly just...poof,and be gone. I have no way to cope with this pain.
I have no doctor. I won't go to the emergency room. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me so I can't do anything to treat myself at home. Oh, god. And I still have to continue working and playing the role of the ever friendly salon manager.
Do they see my smiles to them slip into a grimace as I turn away to get their oddly specific coffee while they sit and get a pedicure? Because I feel hatred at them all for asking me to do anything at all for them. I am full of envy and rage and hatred now. I suppose this might just be who I'm meant to be.
Phases of Submission.
Premium Snapchat|ManyVids|Spoil Me
~Caption deleters will be blocked~
[小さな動き]
send this to ur crush
Weave tied it again…
Pretty
I have no idea if anyone I really know is aware that this blog exists, my hope is that no one does so I can just bitch to my hearts content.
Work things are shitty for several different reasons and because of several different people.
Home things are... Well for the most part fine, it's just that there are a few things that absolutely blow. And I do not know how to fix them or if they even can be fixed.
Medical. I could write an entire book about this but basically it all absolutely fucking sucks donkey dick and again I cannot fix it because shit is stupid and I hate everyone.
New puppy is the single most stubborn fucking dog in the world and is refusing to learn things. Things like his goddamn name. He knows it, he does. But he is an expert at ignoring it when he wants to.
Sleep. Dude. I do not sleep enough.
I am ALWAYS fucking poor. Always. I am not exaggerating. Any money I have goes towards bills and the only thing I can use to help with my pain.
Imma throw in the three ring fucking shit show circus that is our government because I can truthfully say that it is having a massive impact on my quality of life.
Horribly depressed and angry/frustrated with just about everything. There is a deluge of tears that would like to escape from behind my eyes but my stubbornness is not particularly conducive to the bawling.
I can't even talk about WHY I feel like this because either people won't really understand or they will think I'm acting like... I don't even know what. But fuck man. I am so so frustrated with so many things and all I've been doing lately is working my ass off to help everyone else. But I don't get to need help, I don't get to just not be.
I have to pretend I'm fine and functional and smile and then just lay in my bed in the dark staring up at my ceiling thinking about what a fucking disaster everything is. I'm in hell and there is nothing I can do about it.
Oh, and the food that's being prepared for dinner? It's shit I don't eat. So there's no fucking food for me. Awesome. I am done. Done done done. I couldn't tell you what that means exactly aside from being one conversation away from totally blowing up.
I slept for about an hour last night, got up and got ready and went to work and cleaned the hell out of the shop. Now I have four people expecting haircuts from me and I just want to fall over.
I would rather be dead than deal with one more minute of this pain
