I lived bitch

[battleboy]

[Speaking of being a nerd and also music, Bert was in marching band in high school. He played the trumpet. 

He also knows how to play Cruel Angel’s Thesis on said trumpet. 

He can still kinda play but it would take him a Hot Minute to warm up and his trumpet is somewhere in their mom’s house. 

[battleboy]

batttlegirl​:

“Yeah, no shit, the original version isn’t even long enough to cover a proper battle. You think I meant the original? Of course not.” Come on, Hilbert. “I mean you’re the exact kind of nerd who would choose the fucking Evangelion theme, specifically. You’re the guy who would think that, ah, yes, this is what I want to represent my prowess as a champion: the opening for the fucked up existential gay mecha anime. At least learn to interpret my insults correctly, you huge goddamn nerd.”

“I never know with you- you’ll say your original intention was anything that’s the opposite of what I said it was just so you can say I’m an idiot.” Be that as it may--

“Even if it was a longer version with more intensity, I wouldn’t use ‘the gay mecha anime music’. It’s too well known, and I’d be torn to pieces on the internet for being both too basic and also a giant nerd. Like I said- the position of champion is about class. I’d hire the composer to make me something similar, or if I have to pick something that’s already been done, maybe something from Hollow Knight instead. A little more obscure, but recognizable by fans that could appreciate it. Maybe the Nightmare King or one of Grimm’s other themes.”

[battleboy]

batttlegirl​:

“For the record, I’m not the person who designed the chamber. Since my battle chamber is visible from the ballroom, where we do basically all of the public events, we prioritize keeping it historically accurate. Hence the throne. It’s part of the original castle, dude! It’s an important artifact!” …Man, who would’ve thought she’d give a shit about historical accuracy? “I’m just takin’ what they give me and having fun with it. I bet if you were champion you’d be doing the same fucking thing and using, like, A Cruel Angel’s Thesis as your battle music.”

“A Cruel Angel’s Thesis?!”

What in the Gods’ name was she going on about? It takes his face a moment to land on something that felt like it truly conveyed his offense, a twisted look of disgust. Flabbergasted! Outraged!

“A Cruel Angel’s Thesis isn’t battle music! It’s an anime opening! You don’t play just the straight opening during a battle! Unless it’s some extended version of an orchestral remix or something that turns it from a rising introduction of the premise of the show into something that resolves, it’s...an opening!!!”

[battleboy]

batttlegirl​:

“Kalos’ presentation is weak. And who gives a shit about grace? That’s not the energy you bring to a boss fight! It’s about psyching them out! Rattle ‘em! Make 'em doubt whether or not they even stand a damn chance!”

“I walk into your champion room and there’s a hot headed girl who think’s she’s a queen. I walk into Kalos’s champion room and there’s a woman who knows she’s a goddess and doesn’t have to prove it. I’m much more intimidated by the subtly than loud presentations of power.”

A small pause. “Like Geeta. Their league aesthetics? Lackluster. Their champion? Terrifying. The calm before the worst storm.”

[doublebattled]

"My League is in a castle, my battle chamber is a goddamn throne room on a balcony overlooking a huge ballroom where my giant legendary dragon can hang out. All I need is the right lighting and I am the sickest final boss fight. Tell me, who else even comes CLOSE to the vibes my league is putting out? Huh? Who?"

[battleboy]

“Not to play devil’s advocate, but Kalos’s presentation is pretty much the same, and Diantha carries far more grace than you do. Maybe if you hire Cynthia’s composer, you could hold a candle to their chandelier.”

[battleboy]

madamelooker​:

Damn. Seeker was a good one. “I believe his reasoning was something along the lines of, not expecting Kalos to be such a hot spot for international crimes. Anyway, too late now, and I’m the Looker assigned to the case.”

“I suppose as long as no one works with you both at the same time, it shouldn’t be too much of an issue.” He knew plenty of people with the same name. At least three Kyles.

“Sorry if I came off as rude. I’m known as Agent Shinri. I wish Kalos was as safe as mister Looker had hoped, but we live in turbulent times, it seems. How much have you been briefed on the situation?”

[battleboy]

matching icons for you and your detested

[battleboy]

madamelooker​:

“Long story short, I worked under him and he gave me his moniker to use when he left. If I’d known he was going to keep it I would have said something. As it stands….” Maybe she just doesn’t want to think of a different name. They’ve got a whole branding thing going on.

“Was his reputation as a PI really that good that it’s worth keeping instead of making a new name for yourself?” He supposed it made enough sense- ‘Looker’ did sound like a detective. It just made things.....complicated if someone looked into it too hard. 

“You could always play off of his name. Like Seeker or something.”

[battleboy]

madamelooker​:

She and Boss are going to have to have a talk about who gets called what.

“Non, I am Looker. If you were expecting an older gentleman…he’s also Looker.”

“That’s......who I was expecting, yes.” Looker was pretty good at disguises, sure, but this was about fifteen paygrades and five braincells above whatever he could successfully pull off. Unless there was some illusion thing going on......

“How can you both be Looker?”

[battleboy]

@madamelooker​

“You’re not Looker...?”

[doublebattled]

headcanon; “Cherabby aren’t you done yet?” NOPE. Hopefully this one will be shorter than the rest, but I just wanted to talk about how the twins went about challenging all the gyms / e4 as a team.

So, the twins had two main approaches to battling gyms: double format, and, particularly for the earlier gyms, co-commanding their pokémon (especially Hanzo, their oshawott / dewott / samurott). Both of them had their own individual teams of five, plus Hanzo - however, both twins’ teams learned to respond to the other twin in battle quite well, so most of Hilbert’s pokémon would just as willingly listen to Hilda, and vice versa. For doubles format, they’d each select two or three pokémon - this is likely how most of their other pokémon started to learn how to respond to the other, because if Hanzo was included, he would have to wind up with one or the other, but still listened to both, and the others more or less followed suit. They definitely took advantage of being able to command one another’s’ pokémon fairly well, particularly during their Elite Four battles, where they were required to do singles battles with a pre-designated team of six total (Hilda’s selection was Raider, her krookodile, Tesla, her eelektrik, and Hanzo). Plasma battles and those outside the gyms were usually either double or each individually - moreso double for Plasma. A little while into their travels, they contacted Juniper about challenging the gyms as a team, and she was willing to sort out the technical issues surrounding, you know, two people challenging a single gym at once for them.

[doublebattled]

headcanon; Some more detailed history on the twins' life growing up. We'll just sort of sort this into bullet points again for the sake of my own sanity. - Nuvema is basically in the 'burbs. It's a primarily residential area outside of Accumula Town, where the actual "city" itself is. Mind you, the suburbs in the pokémon world are nowhere near comparable to the suburbs in real life, suburban sprawl isn't really a thing I don't think, because like... the whole world isn't based on a car-centric infrastructure. So while the twins "lived" in Nuvema, they attended school in Accumula. - The twins are originally from Opelucid. They also lived in Castelia for a brief time before moving to Nuvema. This is by and large due to their father's passing. Their family moved to Castelia, into a much cheaper apartment, to be closer to the hospital where he was being treated and save some money. When e passed, when the twins were around 12, their mother made the choice to move to Nuvema to try to put some distance between the family and all the Bad Memories. (It didn't work but she sure tried.) - Bianca and Cheren were... kind of the twins' only friends growing up. You know how it is. Hilbert was very Dipper Pines-esque growing up, i.e., a big huge fucking nerd, and Hilda struggled with aggression and ADHD growing up. Though Hilda was involved in a lot of sports, she largely preferred individual ones. - The twins did not set out on their pokémon journey until they were 17 (going on 18, I don't believe I've ever given them an official birthday, but I know in my head it's always been mid-summer), the summer after they both finished high school. Well, mostly finished high dchool, we'll get back to that. Largely, this is because of Bianca's father. - Hilda technically didn't graduate with her friends, having flunked out of her history class and therefore technically not fulfilling the requirement to graduate. The pokémon journey thing was an excuse to procrastinate on summer school and also get her mother and brother off her back, but then, oops, gotta spend the whole time with your stupid brother, actually. She did, however, complete high school following the whole "nearly dying" incident. - And building off of that, Hilda is actually in college! She's only doing her general studies right now as she hasn't yet figured out what, if anything, she wants to major in. As champion (top champion, as they'd say in Paldea) she's actually got a pretty good gig, but she does want to learn and maybe bring some new skills into the league. She's looking into something science-y, possibly ecologic conservation. Being champion does keep her pretty busy, though, so she attends school online.

[doublebattled]

mini-headcanon; both of the twins know Japanese pretty well. They were taught by their father growing up, as he was a specialist in linguistic translation. Though his life's work was in recovering the Isshu language, his primary work at the university was in (Unovan) English / Japanese translation. Hilda also learned Spanish in school and in fact did quite well at it. She's not fluent, per say, but she retains a pretty decent level of competence with it as Spanish is far from uncommon around Unova. She only knows a handful of words and phrases in Old Isshu, again, primarily from her father.

[doublebattled]

headcanon; a formalized headcanon for the sake of not letting myself forget it in the depths of my tags on other headcanons. Let's talk about Ardbert Blake, the twins' father. No, I don't have a FC for him. If I find him a FC then I'll want to add him as a formal NPC and we cannot have that. As mentioned previously, Ardbert was of Isshu descent. Though a lot of Isshu practices were lost, there are still a handful of core ideas that survived to modern day, which Ardbert practiced. (Grammatical sidebar: "Isshu" refers both to the culture and the people group. Quirk of the language.) A quick rundown:

1. Isshu do not (traditionally) use pokéballs. Tradition is to find and befriend a partner pokémon without catching them. Now, mind you, in the modern day and age, this isn't always practical, so some would opt to capture a pokémon after formally befriending them, particularly if their partner was especially large, dangerous, etc. However, a partner pokémon is typically kept outside of their pokéball as much as possible. That said, Ardbert did not use pokéballs. His partner was Axew, and it still lives with the family in Nuvema.

2. Isshu do not eat farm-raised meat, but wild-caught meat is acceptable. Again, practically speaking, this is somewhat difficult in the modern day: that accounts for, y'know, most meat products. Depending on where they live, many Isshu are effectively vegetarian or pescatarian. (The rules regarding animal byproduct, like in gelatin, are a little loosey goosey, but it's generally regarded as fine: ultimately, it abides by another core principle of Isshu culture, which is to respect the body of what you hunt/kill as to not let it go to waste. What isn't used should be returned to where it was found and returned to nature.)

3. Though far from a hard rule by any means, Isshu marriage tradition dictates that the couple exchange emblems of their partner pokémon when engaged, so the couple is symbolically always together. It's all very cute. Ardbert proposed to the twins' mother with a normal ring, but he also later gave her a bracelet with an axew charm. She still wears it.

4. The major cultural holidays take place on the summer and winter solstices, with the latter being the cultural new year, much like how other cultures recognize a lunar new year. Minor holidays are on the equinoxes.

5. Again, this is far from a hard rule, but music is a very important component of Isshu culture. Many of their core mores and norms are born from concepts that are, culturally and linguistically, tied very HEAVILY to music. As such, it's extremely common for Isshu children to learn how to play an instrument. (Hilda is in possession of Ardbert's guitar and old record collection, both of which are in her apartment.)

Ultimately, his cancer diagnoses and passing were just inevitable tragedies. There was no apparent cause, just a stroke of fate that fucked the family over. As his condition worsened and he could no longer regularly work, the family moved to an apartment Castelia from their home in Opelucid in an effort to save some money. He passed just over eight months after, at which point the family was left pretty shell-shocked. The twins' mother would eventually move them further south, to the Nuvema-Accumula area, and. Yeah, that's all in the other headcanon. The twins were around 12 at this time, so definitely old enough that it generally really shook them.

It was only a few months ago, while their mother was cleaning out some old belongings, that some of his personal research notes resurfaced. Initially, they planned to hand them off to the University; his colleagues in turn recommended donating them to a museum collection, at which point Hilda brought them to the league's Historical Society and suggested the exhibit now on display about the translation of the Abyssal Ruins.

[battleboy]

“I was thinking of adding another T. I did it for about two seconds.”

“But now it just looks like you can’t spell, which is accurate, so I changed it back.”

[battleboy]

Hello everyone that is still here this used to be like a beta arceus design blog but I’m gutting it to remake hilbert for @batttlegirl​