être bien dans sa peau @beepbeep-bitch - Tumblr Blog

What girls say: I'm fine

What girls mean: I'm too embarrassed to ask for water from your mom because this is the first time I've been over and she's asked me like 500 times if I wanted any and I've been saying no but I'm dying of thirst

theonion

Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 23, 2017

Gemini | May 21 to June 20 The clown car may be an overworked reference, but the doctors can think of no better way to describe the constant stream of clowns issuing from your abdominal cavity.

Cancer | June 21 to July 22 Ultimately there will be nothing your friends can do for you, putting you in the position of having to find more competent friends.

Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22 The stars say that this week will be a time of reflective contemplation, so postpone your plans to rollerskate around naked except for the gas mask.

Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22 Just when all hope is gone, you will find a secret stash of Oreos that actually makes up for quite a lot.

Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22 Just when all hope is gone, you will find a secret stash of Oreos that actually makes up for quite a lot.

Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21 You’ll lose both legs in a railroad accident next month, but luckily they’ll only be prosthetic replacements for the ones you’ll lose at the zoo this Thursday.

Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21 No one will be able to figure out your enigmatic last words, and the fact that you’ll live in silence for three more years after uttering them makes that somehow cooler.

Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19 After becoming a routine victim of bedbugs, you’ll make history as the world’s first victim of chair-, wall-, and all-over-the-catbugs.

Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18 It comes down to whether or not you can play an instrument or drive stick, but no, you won’t get the girl this time, either.

Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20 You’ve always said that if you were king, you’d make college free, but there won’t be time between your coronation, the palace coup, and the beheading.

Aries | March 21 to April 19 Your daughter’s memory will still haunt your dreams, but it’s a welcome change from all the relived failures and sweaty former scoutmasters.

Taurus | April 20 to May 20 Just when you thought it couldn’t possibly get any worse, the stars confirm that you are correct and it is pretty much as bad as possible.

onlytwitterpics

nippled

cool blog

me looking at my cool blog (via patrik-star)

the-words-blog

perks-of-being-chinese

healingsuggestions

just text them, they miss you too.

evilrashida

I’m sick of seeing lies like this on my dash

sunflowercocoa

okay so in psychology years ago we learnt that it’s common for companies to put women in charge when there’s a predicted downfall so that they could be all ha see women suck at being in charge. and I just find it interesting how the UK is gonna have a female PM right after Brexit so like years from now people are gonna be like “the country saw some of its worst years under a woman” when it was men that fucked it up and then ran

confide--nemini

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glass_cliff

dynastylnoire

Glass cliff Holy shit

theemotionmachine

When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.

Marcus Aurelius (via theemotionmachine)

bymessy

thelovejournals

I never want to love someone like that…so much that there would be no room left for myself,so much that I wouldn’t be able to survive if [they] left me.

Jean Kwok, Girl in Translation (via thelovejournals)

languagecollector

…so when am i gonna actually use all these thousands of language resources i have reblogged

deja72-deactivated20180821

wordsnquotes

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is.

Maxim Gorky, The Lower Depths and Other Plays (via wordsnquotes)

wearmoonlight

The sun is perfect and you woke this morning. You have enough language in your mouth to be understood. You have a name, and someone wants to call it. Five fingers on your hand and someone wants to hold it. If we just start there, every beautiful thing that has and will ever exist is possible. If we start there, everything, for a moment, is right in the world.

Warsan Shire (via thewildestwallflower)