there for you

I woke up pissed off today and lately, e v e r y o n e feels fake. Somewhere, I lost a piece of me smoking { cigarettes } on balconies. But I can't do this alone sometimes I just need a light. If I call you on the phone, n e e d you on the other side. So when your tears roll down your pillow like a river I'll be there for you. When you're s c r e a m i n g out, but they only hear you whisper, I'll be loud for you, but you gotta be there for me too.

[musingmiles]

big news | 002

[beeplays-blog]

musingmiles:

Her body froze when he asked if she thought it was the same as the first time, her instinct wanted to say yes and hope things would stay the same but deep down she had this feeling. Even before she thought of taking a test, flashbacks of things she imagined back when they got excited about the baby were coming to her head. Like her body was giving her hints via her thoughts. “I don’t think it is.” She said quietly. “I’ve been feeling nauseous for days, my boobs are getting bigger and sore, my period’s late. I’ve ate my whole weeks shopping and it’s only Wednesday night.” This was really happening, she just knew. “I’m pregnant…” She looked up at Tony, her eyes forming little salty pools as her smile grew on her face. “I’m really pregnant this time…” 

It took a moment for him to process what was happening; what Jordan was saying. As he took in her words, listening to what had been happening as of late the fear in his stomach slowly began to dissipate leaving him with this bubbly, excited feeling. He met Jordan's eyes and saw the tears, having to remind himself that they were happy tears. "You're pregnant.." He whispered, a giant grin forming on his face as his excitement grew. "You're pregnant!" He wrapped his arms around Jordan's waist, lifting her up in a hug and spun her around, only to quickly put her back down in a slight panic. "Shit -- shouldn't have done that -- you okay?"

[musingmiles]

big news | 002

[beeplays-blog]

musingmiles:

The silence only lasted a few minutes at most but it felt like hours, she leaned against the wall as Tony looked over the test. She only found out an hour earlier so she knew exactly how taken aback he must be. They both knew that Jordan hadn’t been feeling well recently, but it’s very safe to say neither of them expected this to happen, again. Vibrations were booming from her chest through her whole body, she thought the first time was bad but this brought a new meaning to the word. Something about her body was different, the more she let it sink in - the more her actually being pregnant made sense. “Tony…” She spoke quietly, the silence becoming too much and to also make sure he hadn’t turned into a statue on the counter.

He swallowed, looking at the test again just to be sure. This had to be fate; fate being twisted, the maniacal being it was messing with them. But this couldn't just happen again. It couldn't be false -- it would be too coincidental with the way the tests played out. It wouldn't make sense. He looked over at Jordan and based on the look on the girl's face, he knew that she knew. It wasn't false. It couldn’t be. She had that glow to her; and maybe it was the placebo effect taking storm but he had a feeling. A good one to outweigh the bad. "Do you... Do you think it's like last time?" He asked, his voice soft. Vulnerable. Because that's what he was right now. He could place exactly where it was coming from; but he hoped. He hoped and prayed to whatever gods he was raised on and those that he wasn't that this was going to turn out okay. Pushing off the counter and slowly stepping towards Jordan, he took her hand in his own. "Are you okay?"

[musingmiles]

big news | 002

[beeplays-blog]

musingmiles:

Expecting Tony to just walk in unannounced, her head turned to see him frantically looking around the place. “I guess I didn’t need to be so urgent with that message really.” She chuckled, biting her lip as her boyfriend sat next to her. All the same nerves were coming up as last time, only this time - there was a lot more of a chance of things being true. When his hand appeared on her leg, her hand moved with it landing on top of his. “Check the bathroom…” She squeezed his hand lightly before lacing her fingers with his and moving to the doorway of the other room. She let go of his hand, letting him go in alone then nervously stood waiting for a reaction.

Now he was concerned. By the way she sounded, by the way she was leading him to the bathroom. Really, he half expected to see a dead body that he'd have to help her hide and that would be something interesting to explain to his fathers if he got caught. He squeezed her hand before he let go and he stepped inside, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to prepare for what he might see.

For starters, it wasn’t a dead body. Which made him let out a breath of relief. However, his heart sunk as he looked around the bathroom. The pregnancy tests. Part of him hoped that they were negative -- that he wouldn't have to go through that heartbreak again if it didn't turn out how they wanted. But as he stepped closer, looking at every single one of them, and seeing the same results all over -- a twinge of excitement happened inside of him. There was no way that this would be false if every one of the tests came out as positive. Taking a deep breath he rested his hands on the bathroom counter, taking a moment to process what really was happening.

[musingmiles]

big news | 002

[beeplays-blog]

musingmiles:

She left the bathroom door open and walked over to her front door and unlocking it before sitting on the couch. [ everything’s fine, just well you’ll see ] she replied, placing the phone next to her and waiting for Tony to arrive. She thought if she found out she was pregnant again she’d be excited. And she was excited, deep down. But, the fear of this all being a repeat was overtaking it. Hopefully seeing Tony’s reaction would get her to stop worrying. Her head wouldn’t stop going over the same anxieties she had, losing patience she stood up and started pacing. It all made sense, everything added up and there’s more than enough tests to be accurate, so why was she so scared. Pausing in her tracks, she collected her phone from the couch and set an alarm for the morning to make an appointment with the doctor.

Something deep inside was telling him that things were not okay. Jordan was off; something had to be wrong. So he walked a little faster, bypassing a few of his friends who waved hi to him and he waved back, but didn’t stop. He wanted to get to her in case things were seriously wrong. Arriving at her door he walked right in ( a bad habit he had ) seeing her on the couch. Looking over her twice, double checking for any visible thing wrong, he furrowed his brow and stepped towards her. “I don’t see a fire... What’s wrong?” He glanced around the room, just in case it was supposed to be obvious, but he didn’t see anything. He sat down next to her on the couch, placing his hand on her knee. “Because with the look on your face, it seems like.. somethin’ bad.”

[beeplays-blog]

TEXT || alec -- spencer

alec: two high school boys can't usually afford to go all the way to new york /and/ get tickets anyway so, leniency is allowed in my opinion ;)

alec: any time, the kitchen door and back gate's open just shout when you're here

spencer: you're right but there's always the giveaways they do

spencer: that's an odd way to allow someone into your home

spencer: I'll be over soon though

[musingmiles]

big news | 002

[beeplays-blog]

musingmiles:

@beeplays​

something had felt off with her body for a while, she didn’t really think much of it just thought she’d been too reckless recently. she’d stopped drinking and smoking around a month ago, since she started feeling down. after that not doing anything and her period being late, she decided it was best if she took a few tests. 10 tests later and not a single negative. her heart sank, she didn’t want this to be a false alarm again, to make tony and herself go through that again. she jumped up and down a little to get herself together and look at the more expensive tests she got, all of them were positive too. taking a deep breath in she got her phone out and text tony. [ hey, we need to talk asap. can you come over, i’m in the dorms ]

It had been a short while since he had really seen Jordan. After his fathers allowed him to go back to the dorms, he had really been under lock and key there as per request of his fathers. He had only been able to leave for classes, but he managed to sneak out at night to return to his apartment. He had eased up on selling, chose against the harder stuff and in return gave it all to Mason to sell it for him. He still got the money, but he knew that he wouldn't be tempted. Levi was nowhere to be found, so when he saw that Jordan had texted him, he got a little excited until his heart dropped at the text. [ on my way, everything okay? ] he sent back, already getting up and putting on his shoes before he headed over to the girls' dorm.

[theanimalmemes]

[beeplays-blog]

TEXT || alec -- spencer

alec: so i know we haven't got a scheduled project night tonight, but i'm bored and we've been doing this project for two weeks now? so just wanna come over to not do the project?

alec: you don't have to just wondering, we could watch hamilton if u want?

spencer: technically we can't /watch/ hamilton unless you know of any bootlegs but even then that's really disrespectful to the great lin-manuel miranda

spencer: but... I'm sure we can find one somewhere

spencer: um.. what time should I come over?

[beeplays-blog]

ooc to do list ( adding so I don’t fukkin forget) 

reply to jordny

reply to spalec

add tony & farah

revamp everything

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

Her face was against my chest and she said she was breathing my scent. When I asked her what she smelled, her response was ‘home.’

Damien Echols, from

Life After Death   (via holtbekah)

[okcupidescapades]

one time when i was a little drunk and laying in bed with a guy, i kissed his neck and mumbled “i could beat the shit out of you” in his ear.

he said “i know”

[ink-pedia]

Pony Reinhardt

[litandlethargy-deactivated20161]

Fingers in her mouth, Hand between her legs, Whisper into her ear, That if she wants more, she can beg.

The Book Of Lilith - litandlethargy (via litandlethargy)

[onlytwitterpics]

[ethyl-lunchbox-deactivated20151]

[oscar-piastri]

#they are so cute

[nora-durst]

random character aesthetics: couples edition (3/?) ♡ ♥ ♡ TED TONKS & ANDROMEDA BLACK (from Harry Potter)

f i l t h y  b l o o d  t r a i t o r s