a mind-map of heartache
Inside the box, I stood and slipped away
If it were not so lonely
It spread around my body and my blood
And crept to the corners of my eyes.
It switched the light on and I dove right in,
Submerged underneath.
I looked back up towards the lightness from the depths.
Stayed mostly still.
The eels swam up and washed away my fear
My face up towards the open air.
It’s quiet down here, I don’t mind it but I don’t like it either.
I feel as if the gate will close on my time.
Moving faster now, the weeds brush my ankles and fingers.
Reading it over again, thoughts and bubbles rush past,
Slow, slowly now.
I stand out, but yet i slip away, people around me but I am not there.
The trees bend and twist like bodies in the mirror,
The gate swings back and forth, creaking and banging,
The latch is broken.
It swarms around me, like a spinning top.
I see the droplets of the rain on the surface of the water from below.
We cry together about it being over.
This was our place, with the bridge and the gate,
We swam nude and drank warm beer.
I try to map my mind, my thoughts but it’s mostly white noise down here in the depths.
I stand up and break the surface
The sky is cast over
The water drips from my hands.
I keep my room tidy,
And my heart empty.
Goodbye.
