Beyond the Eyeglasses

My short diary. Living each day to become genuinely happy.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

HBD

The average life expectancy of human is until 72 years old. You turned 27 last week so 72 is still 45 years away. You know how I always remember dates and how much I love to greet you and send long messages. I won't be in your life anymore so I want to greet you 45 happy birthdays, 45 happy anniversaries, 45 merry christmas', 45 happy new years, and 45 happy valentine's day. One greeting for each year that I will no longer be with you. I know we promised forever but this is the closest thing to forever that I can give you.

You know how much I look forward for your birthday. When rainy season hits you'll always say, "Umuulan na, birthday ko na!" and that's my reminder. So I hope even on your birthday, you'll look back fondly on the love we shared and how it changed us for the better.

You can be whole again on your own and still want to care deeply for another human being. Embrace wanting to risk your heart. It is the one of the greatest thing you will ever do.

Happy birthday, Atty. I am proud of what you have become right now.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

091421

To my Iska,

I don’t know why I am still writing things like this about you. I think it’s because writing is my way to express what I feel. Writing makes my heart calm. I can be anything I want. The poetic and old school side of me was evident. This is the real me, an old soul trapped inside this body.

These past weeks was hard for me. I slowly watch my happiness fading away, but I see pain coming on my way. My inside have died but my outside is still alive. My self was my favorite book, and a page of it was ripped.

I didn’t give up on you, or us. It was so hard to hang on to you that doesn’t give me back the same kind of attention, and me begging for it. It just felt so draining after some time—and love isn’t supposed to drain you out.

I never imagined I will meet you in an unexpected way. I was in a deep well trying to drown myself but somehow a light shined upon the sky to that tiny hole in which I fell in. You saved me. You saved me from that hole. You believed in me. You believed that I can escape that deep well. We became friends and eventually lovers. We always talk about all the things that kept our curiosity every night. We shared different perspectives about the things that makes us happy.

Your laughter made my room lively. Your smile made my heart beat faster than ever. Those eyes, eyes that looks like you gained by being a cat from your past life. Your lips, lips that was shaped like your heart. Your hair, hair like silk. Your eyes, eyes that was brown like hills. I like every detail of you.

But then again, I always fucked things up. When things seems to fall to its place. I always make mistakes. Mistakes I never intended to do. I am always indecisive. I always have a hard time picking words.

I’m missing you to an extent of wanting to hold you even If I told myself not to.

Let’s meet again for the first time once the universe conspires and be on our side. I believe what’s meant for me will find me…and I hope it’s still you.

Even though we weren’t lucky enough to end up with each other, I still wish you the best in life. I’m glad to know that you’re happy and doing well because that’s all I ever wanted for you. You deserve all the best thing in this world has to offer. And I hope you find your happiness.

Thank you for all the memories that we did together. I am forever grateful that I met you at the first place and had the opportunity to know you but I’m really sorry that you need to deal with someone like me. I’m sorry that you need to know me this far but it is okay.

I’ve touched the moon already. I guess you don’t have to take me there anymore. Farewell to you my moon, you can now find another star.

Paul

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

Why I love dogs

When I was a kid, I vividly remember asking my parents that I want a dog because that time I don’t have a sibling yet. My cousins were too old to play with me. All I can do is to watch the television and not exercising the joy of playing with kids that has the same age with me.  I was in my last year in high school when I got my first dog. A female labrador. It was one of the best days of my life. But they said that we are just borrowing dogs from heaven. They come and give us joy but they will be gone soon. Losing a dog is heartbreaking. The pain transcends to every part of your body and soul. It was as if you lose someone you truly love. Dogs are loveable. They know what you feel... and they try their best to make you feel better. Either by licking you or just being there on your side when you are feeling down. They will never leave until you become okay.

I wish dogs live longer. I am always scared of losing my “child”.

This post isn’t supposed to be sad. But as I am writing, tears poured down. I appreciate my dogs. Thank God for their life, for giving us dogs. They are more than a company.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

I always say that choose your happiness every time... even if that means I’ll disappear in your life.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

It sucks to lose somebody that u felt so connected to. Because they had the power to bring out the best in us. And when they stop loving us, we are not just mourning the loss of that person, but we are mourning the loss of the person we used to be when we were with them.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

A song that kept coming back to me.

Actually, I kept coming back to it

from time to time.

Rough nights to good days,

heartbreaks to self-talks,

usually at long walks,

or cuddled by this empty darkness.

and i’m okay, really.

just... I don’t quite know

how to say

how I feel.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

Trust—

“Kring! Kring! Kring!” the telephone rang.

“Good morning is this Mr. Pyres? This is from the Global Bank Corporation calling.”

“Yes, speaking. How may I help you?”

“I’m here to inform you that your score from the final test will be released tomorrow at 9am in the morning”.

“Okay, thank you! Have a good day!”

After the conversation, he remembered how companies he applied for rejected him.

“I can’t make it.” he said.

“How can you say that when the results are not yet out?”

“Who are you?” he asked.

“I am God.”

“I can’t do it. I am lost. I lost my previous job and now I am looking for another job. A lot of companies rejected me. I lost my loved ones. People don’t believe me anymore. I have nothing to be proud of. My house turned to ashes. My bank account was foreclosed. I am useless. I am nothing.” he added.

“My son, if you are lost come to me, I am the way. I do believe in you because I created you in my own image. I am proud of you. Your failures in life are just the beginning of something I am preparing you at. You lost your valuable things? I will replace those 10x more. You lost your house? Please do know that I have prepared a mansion for you up there in heaven. You are not useless. If you lose your hope, come to me. My ears are always ready to listen to your difficulties.”

The tears poured slowly from the eyes of the boy and he suddenly uttered, “Oh my Lord, please forgive me. I will put my trust in you from now on.”

/jpoq

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

How God Helped Elijah—

Elijah fled in terror. God didn’t get angry or tell his traumatized, depressed follower to suck it up. Instead, He gave him food, something to do, a helper, and a reassurance that he’s not alone.

That’s what Elijah needed, so that’s what God gave him.

I firmly believe that He can do the same thing for us whatever the source of our depression or trauma.

1 King 17, KJV.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

I would like to thank my sponsor of an overpriced commercialized coffee produced by West-driven slave-labor somewhere in the Colombian backwoods. I am rooting for you. You, my epitome of happiness.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

To more study sessions with you 💘

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

My little surprise for her. Narrated our love story through a 4-page case. 💛

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

‪Special thanks to each and everyone that took the time to wish me a Happy Birthday! It was a truly wonderful day - perfect in so many ways big and small! God bless you all! ✨‬

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

“Why do you like her so much?” they asked.

I smirked and said, “Have you ever seen such a wonderful painting inside a museum full of art that it made you cry for it is just beautiful and you want to stare at it for the rest of your life?”

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

These fireworks would amaze a lot of people tonight but out of all the sparkling things in the sky, I’d still choose your light.

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

My reindeer

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

<p>You don’t need another human being to make your life complete, but let’s be honest. Having your wounds kissed by someone who doesn’t see them as disasters in your soul but cracks to put their love into is the most calming thing in this world. — Emery Allen

[beyondtheeyeglasses]

<p>You’re my favorite subject. I will never get tired taking pictures of you. You are exactly what I want.