Robbin' & Shoppin

We are born into a cold and empty universe with no meaning. All my love on the line you turn around and murder mine.

[blackjesusod]

love

im so lucky to have all this love surrounding me .

I love it.

I'm so grateful for all these beautiful women in my life 😍

My baby Bella , Rose , Iris 😍

LOVE IS THE TRUTH

[blackjesusod]

bru

The number of women who have called me "daddy" in the past year is craaaaazy 💀 I don't even ask to be called that & I think it's weird but 🤔 I wonder why

[blackjesusod]

You're not even my drunk thoughts anymore 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

[blackjesusod]

I want to put a bullet in my head

[blackjesusod]

Crying because I can't believe someone i never even met has already said so many beautiful things to me . I wonder if she would feel the same if she knew the real me .

How come love exist?

[blackjesusod]

Why do strangers say the most beautiful things to us ?

[blackjesusod]

Isabel

Well, here I go again. Falling in love with someone. She's like my twin flame 🔥 holy fuck she draws and has 20k followers and she said I stood out the most .

We been talking nonstop for the last week and I just can't believe how cute she is.

At least she lives in Texas. . so I guess I'm safe from heart break. Why do the best people always gotta be so far away ??

I wish I could be with her

[blackjesusod]

I had a dream about Erika last night .. she was finally over her schizophrenia & she was able to actually talk to me coherently.

I even held her & even in my dreams I didn't want to let go of her

I don't even know where she is anymore & I obviously still miss her so much. I don't think I'll ever get over it

[blackjesusod]

I just realized... no one can take me away from this feeling.

No one will ever make me feel like I did.

My love has left a long time ago.

I sacrifice my life to let others live better.

Please 🙏 allow others to strive for more than what I could not .

Take my life as an offering

[blackjesusod]

i like how I said I was gonna be celibate this year & I already caught a whole new body 💀💀💀💀💀

[blackjesusod]

i just got called a "fine nigga" by some black lady lmaoooo & I'm very flattered but very confused too 😹

[blackjesusod]

relapse

last year in October I started to drink alcohol again . 2 years 1/2 , thrown away for my own pleasure. I don't regret it & I believe this is part of the process of healing.

I felt abandoned by my God, the God that gives me strength & will to persevere. I felt so defeated & alone. I thought I was losing control of my life. I had no say in anything.

I turned to alcohol to release these restraints I felt had been placed upon my soul . I wanted to take control of my life & I turned away from God. I did it out of spite.

It felt really good to drink, I felt like a whole different person & I did manage to get a lot done. Although I had to sacrifice a lot... my love , my family, my sanity.

I started to feel terrible . Physically & mentally. I started to realize I was falling into the same hole. Had I not learned anything ? I was determined to prevail , with or without My God's help.

I felt as if everything that was given to me was taken away. I was questioning & cursing God, why would you allow me to suffer ? Why are you allowing these things to occur around me ?

I received no answers. I kept my faith though, I had to look within . God wasn't going to help me.

No more. I took it into my own hands. I cut off everyone . I don't want to be with multiple people anymore. I want love. I stopped drinking because I want to love life how it was intended with no poison affecting how I perceive the world.

Was it worth it? Lmao hell nawl honestly. Idk what the fuck I was doing last year. I attribute this all to my heart being broken because of Erika. I accepted her fate & my heart was crying .. I was blinded by emotions. I wish I could've seen that before all this transpired

Even today I feel still abandoned by my God. But it's okay, my faith is stronger than ever. I will continue to walk this path. I feel better. Mentally & physically.

No more pain

[blackjesusod]

Money don't make me happy.

I look at all this cash in my hands and think to myself

"is this what drives others?"

Like WTF do y'all see that I don't ?

Money doesn't make me happy.

I'll just save it . People like to look at it

[toto-ro]

[blackjesusod]

bro I hate the cold. I wish it was hot so I could skate and be outside. Hate the cold because it makes me so unmotivated to work out

[blackjesusod]

I miss you so much & you'll never even know

[piyox22]