after she killed herself, she killed me too. I was left on the plane between heaven and hell, alone and in the darkness, searching for the smallest glimpse of light that I could feel. for years I prayed for light. I prayed that one day the sun could shine my path and once again I could feel its warmth kissing my skin and my eyes could once again see. I climbed over mountains and swam across oceans in search of any light that I could come across. I was desperate. I searched for my light for seven years. at first, I didn’t even see it. I think her light was too bright that I thought I was hallucinating. so many years in the darkness I forgot how beautiful light could be. but then I saw her again. and there she was. the most beautiful, bright light I had ever seen. she lit up the entire world. I turned around and all the darkness was gone. I looked up and I saw for the first time in years, happiness. she held my hand and pulled me in. she held me and her light started flowing into my veins running throughout my body, pushing out the darkness, flooding it away. she looked at me and told me that I didn’t have to pray for light anymore, that she was here now, and that she would make sure that the darkness never returned to bother me again. I asked her how she found me. she told me that an angel sent her to care for a lost soul. I asked her if I was the lost soul. she said “you are no longer a lost soul, I have found you. I see you, and I love you.”
~ to e.h.p. thank you for always being my light in the dark. I love you forever.
-k.c.
