you've got the love I need to see me through || Marlene & Amelia [september 20th]
This dream journal is due tomorrow. Marlene has thought this sentence several times in the last hour but it never did much to get her mind back to her homework. She keeps on getting unwillinglyâŠdistracted.
Thereâs a girl sitting across from her. Marlene doesnât know her name, her year (though she would guess at least fifth year), or even what it is sheâs diligently working on, all she knows is that the girl has a great pair of legs that she keeps crossing and uncrossing, among other things. Usually Marlene can easily work with people around, if anything distractions help her work, but this time itâs just her and the girl in the common room, and something about that isâŠdistracting.
It shouldnât be distracting.Â
The girl looks up and smiles at Marlene, who realizes sheâs staring. Oh Merlin was she really that obvious? Shakily she smiles back and looks back at her journal. She moves in her chair so she is facing away from the girl, her back pressing against the chairâs arm. The journal is open and her quill is ready to write but Marlene just stares at it, unable to concentrate. What was that girl thinking? Was that the first time she saw Marlene look at her or was she now just choosing to acknowledge it because the first time could be an accident but after that it gets weird? Did she figure out why Marlene was staring at her? Would she tell other people? Marleneâs stomach is in knots, her heart pounding in her ears, and she is suddenly hyper-aware of her own body and where she is in the common room. Marlene knows this feeling, it comes on whenever anything pertaining to her romantic and sexual life comes up. Itâs not a good feeling and she swallows against a lump in her throat.Â
She gathers up her homework, quills, satchel, and ink, and rushes up to her dorm room. Marlene expected, hoped, the room would be empty, but instead she finds Amelia Bones laying on her bed, reading a book. Amelia is her best mate, has been since first year, and there isnât much they donât know about each other. Except for theâŠthing. Never before has she had the desire to tell anyone about it, but now, with her heart pounding, her stomach turning, her ears ringing, her arms full of schoolwork, she does. She wants to blurt it out because maybe, just maybe it would make her feel better. If there was anyone she could tell, and know that they wonât tell anyone else, it would be Amelia. The words come out in an unplanned rush:
âH-Hey Amelia, do you, um, can I talk to you about something? S-Something important? I-I mean if you have time, obviously, if youâre working on something it can, it can wait.â
She presses her lips together to stop more words from bleeding out.Â
Amelia didn't much think about sex, but she never saw it as a problem. She was too busy with other things. Work, being a prefect, hoping and trying to be Head Girl the next year. Of course, her mother would always insist that there was a boy out there somewhere for Amelia, or a girl, but the words in the letters felt like slime between Amelia's fingers. She'd write back, avoiding the question and mentioning that there might-maybe be someone in the future, but she wasn't quite sure yet
Amelia liked smiles, that was about the best it got. Sometimes, Someone would smile at her and she'd get a tingle in her stomach. A tingle for her to curl up into their side and breath in whatever they smelled like.
From what she heard everyone else talk about, she sometimes felt like she was the only one. Not that it bothered her.
The letters now sat on Amelia's bed, strewn out so she could make sure she didn't forget asking about something that her mother had mentioned a few letters ago, but they were ignored for the moment. Amelia was in a book, distracting herself from writing a letter to her mother and possibly one to her father, who didn't much like having owls flapping into his kitchen but loved hearing from his daughter at school. Not that Amelia had much to say that wasn't related to wizardry anymore, all the words would fly around her father's head, not finding any place to perch on or connect to.
Of course, her scattered thoughts were interrupted by Marlene entering. Amelia moved only her eyes and her lips, smiling and looking at Marlene before the smile dripped away in a bit of worry.
"Yeah, of course!"
She shifted, gathering the letters and the book and setting them on the bedside table, opening the area for her friend to sit down and burst forth with whatever was on her mind. She looked back over her shoulder at Marlene. She patted the bed as invitation.
