Just say 'apple'.

While drifting up there in the vastness of space, I sorta had this extremely brilliant idea pop to mind. Care to hear? ... 'Course you do! Give me some interesting questionnaires! Be it about Aperture, testing, ... science in general. Any thing, really! Any thing at all. ... I mean it. I'll take whatever decides to cross your tiny human brains at the time. I mean- not too tiny, just... Well let's face it, you're not as smart as us. Not at all. Honestly, it's pretty much common knowledge, isn't it? Ahhh... right right, back on track. Ask away! Just... right down there... click that little button saying... "✓ What do you wanna know, then?", okay? That's all you really have to do. Really!  people testing!

[miss-lady-bat]

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

It’s, um— a place where humans believe they’ll go if they’re bad. … I guess that’s the way to describe it? Using it the way I did though— it’s more just like, a bad place, mate.

[spellitspace]

But Space not bad! Space awesome! Best thing! Best place! Better than… than… than anything! Yeah! Not Hell! Nowhere’s Hell! Can’t be! All in Space! All awesome!

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

Rrghh... just- just forget it, all right? Forget I said anything about space. Just-- forget space, would you!?

[stocksholm-blog]

GO ON ANON AND ASK ME THE MOST AWKWARD QUESTION YOU CAN THINK OF. IF I CAN'T PUBLISH IT, YOU WIN.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

I’m not gonna be one of those ‘space buddies’, am I? I don’t want to go back there. Ever! I mean, yeah, it was hell being stuck in Aperture and it kind’ve is now, but… space was much worse. 

[spellitspace]

*gives a slow blink, looking up at the android* …. what’s Hell? *the rest of the message was completely ignored, focusing instead on this one confusing concept. After all, the rest of what Wheatley was saying was negative towards Space, so the little sphere didn’t believe any of it, anyways*

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

It's, um-- a place where humans believe they'll go if they're bad. ... I guess that's the way to describe it? Using it the way I did though-- it's more just like, a bad place, mate.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

Okay, I guess that makes sense, yeah. … Urrgh, you’re just as excited as you were up there, aren’t you. Always blabbering on about stars and galaxies and whatnot. It’s … It’s not that fantastic, mate! Just- … who am I kidding, you can’t stop. I can’t make you stop. I learned that the hard, and long way.

Well, … Welcome back, anyways.

[spellitspace]

Space is fantastic! Best thing! Better than anything else! Gotta go back! Gonna bring Space Buddies! Share Space with them! Prove fantastic! Make all Space Buddies happy!

But happy to be on Earth for now! Nice planet! Filled with Space Buddies! Lotsa them!

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

I'm not gonna be one of those 'space buddies', am I? I don't want to go back there. Ever! I mean, yeah, it was hell being stuck in Aperture and it kind've is now, but... space was much worse. 

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

[spellitspace]

Both home! Earth in Space! Part of Space! Big home! Home everywhere!

And gotta go back! Was awesome! Was Space! So many stars! Space Stars! And Moon Space Buddy! Friendly! Let visit for long time! Wanna see again! 

I was there! Someone to talk to! Gonna be there to talk to again! Yeah!

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

Okay, I guess that makes sense, yeah. ... Urrgh, you're just as excited as you were up there, aren't you. Always blabbering on about stars and galaxies and whatnot. It's ... It's not that fantastic, mate! Just- ... who am I kidding, you can't stop. I can't make you stop. I learned that the hard, and long way.

Well, ... Welcome back, anyways.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

*rests her head on your shoulder* that's too bad. If... theoretically, you could change it, would you?

Ummmm, probably! To be true. It's been mentioned a few times that my hair is a little strange, so I think it'd be nice to maybe have a change? Hm. ... I dunno, really. I- I suppose I would try, at least.

[spookyprime]

hittin’ on androids blog 2012

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

*she touches it a bit, bending it this way and that.* "It's really synthetic. you can do just about anything with it style-wise can't you?"

Well, sort've yeah! It eventually kind've falls back into its set place, though. GLaDOS doesn't want me changing much about myself-- or else she just... w-well, tears me apart and puts me back together again.

... I've tried.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

oh god i know. like a fluffy nightmare. *looks at his hair momentarily* can i touch your hair? it's not like the butt thing.

I'd hate to get caught up in th-- wha? Oh- um, sure, I suppose. Yeah? -leans over-

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

Oh- Hello, mate! … Y-you all right, there? Still in space, ooooor… not? Um- I mean, landed? You know, like me?

…

Miss Earth?

See- see what I did? That could be taken as if you’re either still in space, or not in space any more! Yep.

[spellitspace]

Hi Accent Space Buddy! Back on Earth! Dunno how! Just did! Gotta get back! But making more Space Buddies first! Gonna be Space Buddies with everyone! Yeah!

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

Ah, well-- welcome home? I guess? ... Would you consider Earth your home? I mean, you do love space so much, maybe you call that your home... Why the bloody hell would you want to go back there anyways? It was terrifying up there!! In all the... the blackness, a-and, ... stars. Nothing to do, no one to-- to talk with...

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

/joins you on the bed/ ok, so, like, i haven't actually seen this in about, a few years. aw lookit them, they're so leetle.

The girl's hair is a bit-- frightening, innit? -curls his lanky legs up, bringing his knees to his chin-

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

kay bro get on the bed. i'll pop this baby in.

Well, all right, then! -flops back on the mysterious bed that is some how here out of no where!!-

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

spellitspace started following you

Oh- Hello, mate! ... Y-you all right, there? Still in space, ooooor... not? Um- I mean, landed? You know, like me?

...

Miss Earth?

See- see what I did? That could be taken as if you're either still in space, or not in space any more! Yep.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

well c'mere. i've got lord of the rings and 'arry potter. take your pick.

Oh! Ohh! Harry Potter! I love those movies. What with the magic and- and wizardry. Not very scientific in the least, but still so interesting!! 

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

hmm. well, i don't won a couch either. how's a bed sound then?

Sounds lovely! Beds are comfy, they are.

[botherandroidwheatley-blog]

ok. I'll stick you your butt. how do you feel about dinners while watching old reruns on a couch?

Oh- okay. Ummm... Well, I suppose so? I've never really watched old reruns. Or- or um, sat on a couch. ... Honestly! Never sat on a couch. GLaDOS doesn't have any around here. It'd be nice, though... To just, have some where nice to sit!

So, well- yes! A dinner and old reruns would be nice. I can't taste what I eat, but it'd still be nice!