Chapter 1
It was supposed to be a normal day. They were supposed to get up, go to the store, maybe grab a drink at the coffee shop, then come home and watch something on Netflix. That's what was supposed to happen. Because it was supposed to be a normal day.
But, instead of that perfect, normal, very bland and not-panicky day, they wake up to something that changes their day entirely. You see, Arson is a normal 18 year old person. And by normal, I mean that they are the rainbow sheep of their family.
Arson grew up in a small Christian town that nobody can remember the name of. And when I say, picture those snobby, homophobic, would-piss-Jesus-off type Christians. Their family was similar, but a bit more accepting.
So, when Arson came out as a nonbinary bisexual, it surprised everyone. Suddenly they were the talk of the town, and not in a good way. Arson left on their own accord. Not because they couldn't stand the snide remarks from the town. They could just flip shit right back at them. What they could not take was their parents refusing to use their new name and pronouns. Their siblings got it just fine. Their older brother even explained it his 3 year old daughter. But Arson's parents never tried. So they left.
Which brings us to today. To their not-so-perfectly-normal-day.
Arson wakes up by the annoying ring of their phone. "Hello?" They grumble out, not even looking to see who it was.
"Honey, are you still sleeping?"
"Yes mom. It's 7 in the morning on a Saturday."
"But don't you need to get ready for dinner tonight?"
Shit, they think. I can't believe I forgot!
"Mom, isn't dinner at 6? Why would I come any sooner?"
"To come visit with your family of course. And, are you bringing a guy this time? I know your brother said you were seeing someone."
"Maybe I'm bringing a girl home. Why jump to conclusions?"
Their mom sighs. "Honey, when will you get over this rebellious stage and be normal? I miss my little girl. If you just would go back to being normal, the town would forget about this and you could come home."
"Mother, it is not a rebellious stage. This is who I am. And may I remind you that I am not your little girl, nor was I ever. I am your child. Can you please at least try?"
"Annie, we're not having this discussion again."
"It's Arson, mom, and yes we are. My name is Arson. I am your child, not your daughter. I am nonbinary, not female. Why can't you at least put in the effort? My brothers have! Lottie even knows my name and how to refer to me! Why don't you ever try! You say you miss me? This is why I left. I could handle everyone in town giving me looks and calling me names, but my parents? It's bullshit mom. And this is normal. Maybe if you opened up your eyes a little you'd see that. Because it's either you try or you lose me forever. That's just it. I can't deal with this shit anymore."
They feel much better after that rant. It's been something they had wanted to get off their chest for a while now.
"Are you still coming to dinner tonight?"
"I still want to see my brothers, and their kids, so yes." They sigh. Leave it to their mom to shove off something like that.
"Okay. I'll see you then. I love you... Arson."
"I love you too mom... Thank you."
They hang up, a small smile spreading across their face. They knew it wasn't going to last forever, but at least they heard it once, right?
They sit back, opening up some random witch page. In an actual phase of rebellion, they had decided to study witchcraft. Not that any of these have done anything. They didn't truly believe in spells making things float. It just didn't seem plausible. But neither did a big person in the sky who runs the world.
They look through, genuinely bored. Their eyes scroll across the page, mentally marking them as bogus. A knock at the door causes them to stop. They head over to the door and open it, the mailman already heading back to his car. They had forgotten that the mailbox was hit by a kid last Friday.
They look down, seeing a small, rectangular box on top of a bunch of envelopes. They pick it all up, studying the box for a second, and head back inside. They set the box down on the table, ignoring it for now. They went through the envelopes throwing all the junk away and reading just a few of the letters they received from their younger brothers.
Sighing, they look over at the box, interest piqued once again. It was wrapped in some sort of cloth. It looked to be over 50 years old. On the cloth, written in gold colored ink, was their name and address, as well as a strange symbol. There was no return address.
Upon peeling away the cloth, they saw that it was, in fact, a book, not a box. In fact, it looked to be an old, used journal.
"What the fuck?" They whisper to themselves.
They gently touch the cover but yank their hand back instantly. The book was hot. "But the wrapping was cold?" Arson questions to no one.
They tentatively return their hand to the journal. The heat courses through their body and then disappears. They furrow their eyebrows, hand gently coursing across the now cool book. They flip open the books cover, finding notes or initials to see who this belonged to. They watch in amazement as their name and hand print appear in gold ink.
They flip through the book, finding an assortment of spells. Most didn't require anything but magic, something they did not have. They sigh in frustration. When something magical actually happens, they lack the one thing needed to continue with it. They toss the book onto the counter in frustration. A smaller piece of paper comes out.
"What's this?" They ask, picking it up. It had a spell that was written in gold ink. "That's... different."
"Yeah because it's important!" A voice whispers, not loud enough for them to hear.
"Shut up Alex!" Another voice replies.
"You shut up, Jordan!"
"Who is that? Who's there?" Arson asks, whipping around. There isn't anyone there so they turn around, brows furrowed.
"See? They'll hear you!"
"It's not like they can see us! We're not even here!"
"I can hear you! Come out right now!" Arson yells, turning around again. They start checking everywhere in the room, but nobody is there. Chucking it off to needing some sleep, they go back to the "important" spell.
"Let's see. Summons and binds an angel to the caster as a permanent guardian. Seems like a good place to start I guess. What do I need... 5 candles, salt, peppermint leaves, dill seeds, bay leaves, chamomile flowers and some dried nuts and fruits. I have all of that here! I'm sure trail mix will do!"
They quietly mumble the instructions to themself, groaning upon the second instruction. "You need my blood? Why is that even a thing?"
They walk around the kitchen, grabbing the required materials. They grab two bowls, one for the blood and one for the spell ingredients. They bite their lip and cut their hand. "I cannot believe I am doing this. This better fucking work."
They sit down, the necessary supplies next to them. They look at the symbol on the bookmark and sigh. Picking up a paintbrush they dip it into the blood and paint the symbol onto the ground, big enough that the bowl could fit in the small inner circle. They sigh when they realize it took all of the blood.
They put the five candles in equal distances around the outer circle. They light the candles in the order they sat them down, muttering a word for the first four candles lit. "Terra. Caeli. Ignis. Aqua." They hesitate on the last one, not knowing how important this one was. "Arson."
They feel energy in the room, and the candles light up a bit brighter. They smile and continue following the instructions. They put in the salt first then grind up peppermint leaves with their fingers and mix it into the salt. Next, they place the chamomile flowers in a circle on the outer part of the mix. They put the dried nuts in the center of the flowers and sprinkle the dill seeds on top. The fruit gets sprinkled in as well, with the bay leaves places in the middle, not touching the chamomile.
Arson takes a deep breath and makes another cut on their hand, letting a few drop of blood drip into the bowl. They stand up and light a match. "God I hope I say this right. Detrahet me in Angelus. Liga eam mihi in sempiternum. Et fac me custodem." They throw the match in the bowl and jump back as the candle flames flare up and the bowl shoots a flame three feet high.
They hesitate for a moment, unsure it if worked. Suddenly flames erupt again and there's a very angry looking person standing in front of them. Upon closer inspection with the reduced flames, they could tell that this was not a person, and rather some sort of unearthly being. Of course they fucked it up.
They both glare at the other, not saying anything and instead inspecting who was in front of them. This being was vaguely human like. It had black hair, human looking eyes, and even the general features of a human face. There were horns sprouting out of the top of it's head.
"Who the fuck are you?" Arson asks, incredulous.
The being growls, eyes turning red, and black, charred wings raising from behind it.
They stand, arms crossed, looking at the being with disinterest. "I've seen worse out of a horror movie," They deadpan. They give the being a tight smile . "Let's try this again, differently. Hi. I'm Arson, the one who summoned you here."
"I know who you are, witch. You said so in your spell," The being snarls.
River lets out a sigh. "I am just trying to be nice. Can you just tell me who you are and how I fucked this up so badly?"
"I'm the archangel Lucifer, the once you summoned and stupidly bound to you."
Their eyes widen, before they roll them and shake their head. Of course I didn't fuck it up. No, it worked but out of every angel I could summon, it had to be Lucifer. And of course I chose this morning to do this instead of any other day this upcoming week. God, my parents will kill me if Lucifer doesn't.
"I can't, you stupid woman."
They look at him with a vengeance. "Okay we need to set some things straight. I am not a woman. I haven't fought this bullshit for this long for you to do this to me too. I am not a woman. I am not a man. I am a person. Not a she. Not a he. A they. Just like you are neither male or female. You're just... you. I, am just me. Got it?"
The angel begrudgingly nods his head.
"So, if you want to say that the right way, try 'I can't, you stupid mortal.' Packs a better punch anyways."
Lucifer snorts. "At least that's something we agree on. I understand your qualm with being called something you are not. I apologize for my mistake."
Their eyes widen, genuinely surprised at this apology, but it quickly disappears when the other question they had pops back into their head. "You're forgiven, but what the fuck do you mean you can't kill me? And you can read my thoughts?"
"Yes, I can read your thoughts. We're bound, remember? I'm stuck to you, you're stuck to me. So yes, I can read all your thoughts. But you can also read mine, if you can understand them."
They groan. "That shit isn't fair. Why'd I have to get you! And answer the question! Why can't you kill me?
"We. Are. Bound. Are you stupid or something? Did you read anything about this spell before you did it?"
"Well, yeah. I read what it was supposed to do. Now, the fine print, I did not. So what, I'm permanently stuck with the devil?"
Lucifer tenses but nods. "Yes. Apparently so."
"God, when my dad finds out-"
"When your dad finds out? If my father finds out abo- No you know what? I bet he did this on purpose! He always meddles in this type of shit. He always has a plan. He knows I detest you humans, so what better than to bind us together for the rest of eternity?"
"Eternity? Bitch, we may be bound forever, but forever ends when I die. And I've only got like.... 70 years, tops. I'm sure it'll fly by for you."
Arson jumps as Lucifer snorts, fire flaring slightly. Fucking dramatic ass.
"One, I heard that. And two, you bound me to you. Who, yes, would die in maybe 70 years. But, use the fucking brain for more than two seconds and you'd realize that you are also bound to me. An eternal being. Meaning, you are now, essentially, an eternal being, since we have to be stuck together for eternity."
"Fuck no we ain't. How do I undo this shit?"
Lucifer picks up the bookmark and waves it in front of Arson's face. "Read the fine print and maybe you'd know all of this."
They quickly skim it, groaning.
This spell is unable to be undone. It permanently binds an angel to you, and you to that angel. Unless specified, and angel will be chosen for you. Once bound, you'll be bound for eternity. And once again, this is unable to be undone. Only proceed if you are sure.
They sigh, looking at Lucifer. "What pronouns do you want?"
"What?"
"You can't walk around this planet looking like that. And, I know you can shape shift, so are you going masculine, feminine, or androgynous?" Lucifer quickly shifts into a male. "Of course. Now, what pronouns? He/Him? She/Her? They/Them? There are many options here and I need to know how to refer to you."
"Any pronouns will work. As you mentioned before, I do not have a gender."
"Of course you make this difficult. You get they/them. Easiest for me to remember."
"Now that we have that covered, I feel like there are more pressing matters at hand?"
"Yes Lucifer, there are. You think you can look presentable at dinner tonight? We have to go see my very Christian family."