Theories of a Brown Monkey @brownmonkeytheory - Tumblr Blog

To the girl at the other side of the world:

In a sea of strangers, all of us can easily panic and grab at the nearest thing that reminds us that we are here. Yes, it is unfortunate that that happened but I, for one, do not blame you for wanting to be alive. Never apologize for saving yourself and keeping your sanity intact. I know that you know you do not want it to happen, I know that you know that what happened is a product of panic, a knee-jerk reaction to hang-on and survive. But I want to remind you that you are a good person, and you are loved, and I am happy that you have that conscious effort to try avoiding what is harmful. These are always good steps.

Listen to the raindrops, listen to your breathing. Aren't those little miracles worth all the hassle of living? You are a friend with yourself, talk to yourself how wonderful you are when you dance, and laugh, and love! You know that you can really listen to yourself because you have always been deeply honest and kind to yourself.

We are all swimming this sea of life, and wherever you are in the sea we generally keep afloat in the same way. As such, whenever you are under the water, do not be afraid to exhale, and whenever you rise, take that opportunity to inhale. But whatever happens, remember you are beautiful, and you are loved. We are waiting in these shores, always remember that you have friends and a home.

#relapse #love #to the X #mental health

Come home, please.

How I miss your lovely shores Those warm sands, whispering waves, I love you and fooled myself... Hoping this darkness are just clouds, But, No, You are now the night, And horror, and loneliness.

#11:55pm #depression

Stations of the Cross

Joseph Guillermo

I Nasa North Avenue ang mga kristo Isisiksik sa mga bagon at huhubaran ng dignidad Kukutsyain na: magingat sa mandurukot Kahit andami na nilang nakurakot; Ang kristong madlang kapawisan Kahit kakaragkarag, pinagtitiisan, Nangangamba malate kapag naiwan. Paparating na sa Quezon Iniipit mga kristong parang pison, Ang mga kristo'y nasasakal Sa kanilang mga krus na bakal. Para saan? Para may bigas pa silang maitatakal. Dala-dala ng mga kristo ay araw na mabigat, Habang suot ay korona ng pawis't dugo sa balat Kapit sa krus, ninanamnam ang pagkasalat, Boss ko, boss ko, teks nila, patawarin mo kami’t Sigurado na on-time hindi namin makakamit.

II GMA Kamuning, tumirik ang tren Nadapa ang mga abang kristo naten Nagdasal na ang pagtirik ay hindi pagtigil Kaya pasakit ay titiisin kahit naggigigil. Cubao pa lang sa may Araneta, punyeta, Mapapamura ka lang na madadamay mo ang iyong ina Dito ang sangkristuhan ay patuloy ang pagbulusok Ina kong mahal, kami pa ba’y sa paradiso makakapasok? H’wag magtulakan, magbigayan tayo, iyak ng isa Sagot ng iba ay mura sa kanya-kanyang ina.

III Nasa Annapolis, lugar ng mga pulis Mga boss nila’y dami ng INRI naisulat Daming Simon pinipilit linisin mga kalat Ortigas, mga kristo tumatanaw sa Madonnang matigas Ikaw ay anak, itong babae at bayan, mga ina hindi lilipas.

IV Ina, ina, hikbi nila, kalian ba ito lilipas? Kami ay inosente, pero kami ang nadadale? Punas ng kwelyo't bimpo ang madugong mukha Kinakanta na lang ng hikbi ang pagkadukha.

V Shaw, ang mga kristo ay nauuhaw Ang pagtirik nagkakaroon ng ritmo ng sayaw, Sa Boni, umiiyak ang mga kristo sa gulong tumitili Guadalupe, pangatlong beses, tuluyang nadapa muli

VI Buendia, yung damit na maganda’y wala na. Ilalim ng lupa, loob ng bagon ay impyerno. Ang kahihiyan at kabanalan, may natitira pa? Ayala, Magallanes, pinapako tayo, matatapos pa ba ito?

VII Taft, nakababa na nga ang mga kristo, Ngunit sa mga mukha nila sila ay yumao. Sumusuko na ang mga kaluluwa ng mga kristo. Gagapang ang mga ito sa Baclaran, Magsusumbong ng mga pinagdadaanan. Saan pa nga ba uuwi ang mga kristong aba, Sa kanilang apartamentong tumataas ang renta? Saan pa nga ba sila dudulog, pagod na sila, Kay Pilato na nabuwisan ka na nanakawan ka pa? May makikinig pa ba sa kanilang hinagpis? Wala na silang lakas mangbulabog at mainis. Saan pa ba iiyak ang mga kristo natin, Kundi sa Kristo na kasama nila nagbuhat, At dinudulugan ng magandang araw na sisikat.

#semana santa #holy week #poem #christ #mrt #train #philippines

Hail Marcos

#duterte #marcos #philippines #captain america #hydra #everybody in the government is hydra

A Remembrance of Things Past, and a Dreaming Towards the Future

Under the Olive Tree, a choral presentation made possible with the partnership of Ayala Malls and the Intramuros Administration, cannot choose a better place for its Sunday presentation than the site of Iglesia de San Ignacio, a site currently being reconstructed as the Museo de Intramuros. The site serves as crux of memory, history, and poetry especially with the theme of the program. The ensemble director, Christopher Arceo, explained that for this fourth season of the Aleron – an all-male ensemble and overall winner for the Takarazuka International Chamber Chorus Contest – the choir chose engagements on our human experiences on the horrors of war and our collective hope for peace.

On the helm, the esteemed Eudeince Palaruan — resident composer for the Madrigal singer and principal conductor of the San Miguel Master Chorale — conducted for the experiential concert. This is an opportune moment for the audience to see Mr. Palaruan command the Aleron before he leaves for Singapore.

The program started the night with the English Renaissance classic Civitas Sancti Tui of Byrd. The choice of Byrd is complex but the leadership of Mr. Palaruan to Aleron had brought the audience to an adventure of a nightlong engagement of a world that suffers and the calling out to the divine for salvation. And that is exactly the word to describe this experiential concert, an adventure and vigil of sort. The feeling of awe was further accentuated with the very successful lighting design of Mr. Cortezano. The lighting tied the baroque of Byrd with the newly painted and towering pearl gothic walls of the Iglesia. Throughout the program this masterful direction of lighting heightened the experience as it played with the sense of temporality of the audience.

Also, the talented Karen Gaerlan – nominee for the Gawad Buhay 2016 for Best Featured Female Performance – narrated a symbolic monologue penned by Arkel Mendoza. The monologues were reimagination of Filipino rhythmic games of children and stood as introductions to various choral works of Bach, Reger, Feliciano, Barber, to name a few. The monologues act as a juxtaposition between the innocence of children and the terror that stems from the cruelty of men. Unfortunately, it is a shame that the size of the Iglesia had, for the most part, overwhelmed these poignant transitions making some parts barely audible or removing the dramatic impact.

At any rate, the overall experience was like watching an interesting engagement of the Divine Comedy. The site, being a reconstruction of an old church, lends to this acute aura but it goes beyond its former Christian purpose. Tho choices of music and the repurposing of the site into a museum had transformed it into a temple for our common human experience of beauty. Throughout the program I had a couple of favorite pieces Aleron performed, namely Raua Needmine by Tormis and Panahon by Palaruan. Tormis’ treatment of the Finnish epic that depicts the birth of iron, and by extension violence at a massive scale, was powerful as its shamanic drumming and the powerful voices of the choir enthralled the audience to an older world of fear and awareness of one’s mortality. Aleron was powerful in this particular piece, especially when they left the stage for the aisles in order to maximize the cavern-like space of the Iglesia. Meanwhile, Palaruan’s treatment of Ecclesiastes was masterful and sentimental, primarily because the language used was Filipino and as such the pains in our recent collective memory and the hopes for a better life becomes closer. Aleron’s Filipino undercurrent and roots give credence to the emotion and power of their performance of this piece. Another powerful piece, which serves as the basis for the title of the program Under the Olive Tree was A Stopwatch and an Ordance Map. The title was derived from the choral work of Barber which was based on the poem of Spencer. The piece tells the story of a fallen soldier and his military gear, while the music adds to the text by alternating between the sternly martial and the eerily sentimental. The piece is notoriously demanding piece but Alteron managed to weave and express the theme of the mortality of man and the heaviness of memory.

In the span of two hours, Alteron explored the deep seated struggle of man against his fellow men and with himself. This exploration met a rejoinder on the second part where violence and memory was contrasted with pieces that evoked repose and quintessence. The program, with pieces from Elder’s Elegy; Reger’s Nachtlied, Op. 138, No. 3; Bach’s Gute Nacht, o Wesen; Lauridsen’s Sure on this Shining Night; and Ešenvalds’ Stars; serves as a contrast to the realness of war. The second part addressed this realness by seeing peace and rest that comes with the night, the introspection that comes with a slow descent towards sleep, and if my interpretation with the whole program is correct, the hopes that dreams create and a new dawn brings.

#aleron #under the olive tree #intramuros #war #peace #eudeince palaruan