“you highly doubt it? why’s that? i’ll propose to you right now… you have any onion rings? not quite the same thing, but it’s only temporary. i promise,” he said, finishing it off with a whine. while it was said in a playful tone, there was a depressing amount of honesty in it. he would absolutely marry breck. he had absolutely no common sense when it came to him anymore. he ignored the fact that the embarrassing stories didn’t exist. there was doubt that his parents bothered to remember anything about him, nonetheless tell stories. “what? oh, uh…” his voice drifted, realizing the lie was there and he had no choice but to work his way through it. “well, no, but i have no doubt in my mind that if they met you they’d be more than accepting.” or, more than likely, that was nami’s delusion speaking. “i get it, though. you shouldn’t feel guilty. instead, now, you should feel free. live how you wanna, do what you wanna. they aren’t here to watch you, and i’m happy to do all sorts of dumb shit with you. catch up, you know?” nami goes quiet, a small smile tugging onto his lips before he was reaching out, placing his hand underneath breck’s head and lifting his chin back up. “it is a compliment. you’re cute. like a puppy. i wanna take care of you, protect you. you know?” maybe that was a bit too honest, and he sucked in a breath as he tugged his hand away. “if you were my puppy, obviously.” he was quiet as breck continued, noddling along. “so you feel like this life isn’t grand enough for you? daydream about something more exciting? i mean, billionaire or alien sounds pretty exciting, but… say the word and we can make this life exciting for you, too. no more living in fear or worrying about the consequences. say what you want and i’ll help you get it.”
he laughs, shaking his head at nami’s antics. sometimes he really wonders what goes on in the other boy’s head. he knows there’s something off about him, but he still isn’t sure if he cares enough to dig a little deeper to find out. he’ll come back to it, he tells himself. he’ll come back to it when he isn’t so busy just trying to keep his own head above water. “c’mon, you’d waste onion rings like that? i don’t think we’d be very compatible then. i take the safety of food very seriously.” he scolds, playfully. “you think?” he quirks a brow, not so convinced by his words. “cause i’m pretty sure my dad would kill me.” he adds, hoping to pull a little more information out of nami. the more he knows the better. that way he can best determine what route to take in order to hurt him down the line. “it’s kind of a cliche, don’t you think? the two little good, church going boys growing up to like dick.” he chuckles. “maybe it is true that you always want the things you’re not suppose to.” perhaps that’s why breckin has chased after the idea of love all his life. when he feels nami’s hand guiding his head back up so that their eyes are locked, he leans into the touch and finds that he doesn’t even need to think the action through. it’s like second nature to him at this point. “do you think i’m someone who needs to be taken care of?” he asks. “i won’t get mad or anything, just wanna know how you see me.” he corrects, pushing a few pieces of his bangs away from his forehead. “well, i’m not sure what i want.” he admits. “i wouldn’t know exciting if it slapped me in the face. what would you suggest? what do you think is something that everyone should experience? something that... kinda defines you in a way yet is super exciting, too.” he says, reaching over to wrap his hand around nami’s. “something that would get me into a lot of trouble if my dad found out.” he laughs.
kianna was going to interrupt him by letting him know that he didn’t have to get up and make her coffee, but he had already zoomed back into his apartment to grab her a mug. she continued to pet mr. timothy, now watching her surroundings as well, looking down at the street to see if any cars had passed in the past minute or so. she also watched the people walking into the businesses as well, but soon stopped looking once she worried that they might see her above them. as soon as he came back out and explained to her that the coffee was black, she quickly shrugged with just a tiny smile, now taking the mug and thanking him silently. “that’s okay; i drink my coffee any way, to be honest. caffeine in any form is good caffeine.” she partially joked, now cringing at herself internally; that was a terrible joke. once he asked about her pet, her smile brightened a little bit more, but not too much. “this is mr. timothy,” she began as he nuzzled against her stomach. “he loves cuddling.”
“when it comes to our majors, i’d say that you’re right.” he smiles, tapping his fingers on the railing. his gaze travels to her now forgotten notebook again, but he quickly averts his attention to the cat when she starts speaking. but he’s already debating with himself on whether or not he should ask her about it. would it be too personal? would it potentially make her pull away? he doesn’t know the answer to either of those questions because he can’t get a firm hold on who kianna is. he has no idea what makes her tick and that’s strange for someone like him who prides himself on being able to read people so well. “mr. timothy.” he repeats. “gotta say, i didn’t expect something like that for his name. thought it’d be more of a generic name.” he admits. something like snowball or oreo or some other variation of dumb names that people give to their pets. “there are cats who like to cuddle?” he asks, quirking a brow. “i had a cat when i was young and i’m pretty sure he tried to suffocate me. i think they may be too smart for their own good.” he says, the lie slipping out easily. in all of his twenty-one years, not once has breckin owned any animal. “i was thinking about getting a pet myself. couldn’t decide on a cat or dog though. or maybe something smaller, like a lizard. got any input for me? any advice?”
“i only meant that no one likes a gossip,” he says, holding up his hands innocently, but that’s not what what he meant and he knows it just as well as breckin does. “i’m insulted that my company isn’t worthwhile enough on it’s own,” he comments, pretending to be offended by breck’s words. he’s never had to tell z that he finds his company worthwhile though, it’s not something that has to be said because it’s mutually understood. “and to further insult me, you insinuate that i wouldn’t make it worthwhile once we got there,” he adds with a few disapproving clicks of his tongue, shaking his head too to really show his disappointment. he abandons the puzzle without a second thought as he follows breck out of the student lounge. “i’m sorry, did you have a better suggestion?” he questions, his words laced with sarcasm - though the responsibility rightfully had fallen on z since he’d been the one to pull breckin from his studies. he leads the way though, as he’s told, and he’s thankful that the campus isn’t all that big. breaking in wasn’t nearly as difficult as he’d assumed it would be, and once he was in the pool room he stood at the edge of the it, admiring the water. “fuck you, this was a good idea,” he huffs as he turns to look at breck.
he doesn’t know why, but he’s always been somewhat soft when it comes to zelan. actually, scratch that, he does know why but he would never admit it to himself or out loud or otherwise. he knows there’s too much at stake when you care about someone so much; there’s way too much to lose. he wonders if the what if’s are what has caused him to try and pull away from zelan over the years; he wonders if that’s why he tries to avoid spending too much time with him. he just doesn’t want to think about what he may have had if only things were different, if only he had been born as someone capable and deserving of love. “we’ll see about that, won’t we?” he replies, pushing all of his thoughts to the back of his mind. he doesn’t want to think of those possibilities right now, he has all the time in the world to do that when he’s alone. right now, he just wants to enjoy zelan’s company for a while. closing his hand into a fist, he digs his blunt nails into his palm as a distraction from the whirlwind going on in his mind and follows the other straight to the pool. he isn’t even surprised at how quickly (and how easily) he gets them both inside. “i think that’s still up for debate.” he smiles, dropping his bag to the floor. he walks over to zelan, sidles up right behind him, and reaches into his back pocket. admittedly, he does so slowly, and takes his time to pull out the phone tucked away there. “tell me how the water feels.” he whispers in his ear before pushing him into the pool.
it was pretty early in the morning, but kianna liked to spend some time to meditate before arriving to BIO325, then dreading the rest of the day. her cat, mr. timothy, was cuddling up on her lap while she listened to some of her favorite classical music.
the view of her apartment wasn’t amazing; it was overlooking a quiet street and a couple of businesses were across the street, but the sunrises were usually stunning. sometimes she would wake up early enough to experience them.
she was writing in her journal. her therapist had told her to write about her thoughts and feelings every morning and night so that she compare how she was feeling at the beginning of the day versus the end. her thoughts at the time weren’t too overwhelming, but she was definitely in mourning; it was still so hard to believe that her close friend from childhood was dead, and she was involved. how did this even happen?
she was so lost in thought while writing out her feelings that she jumped at the sudden familiar voice next to her. she gasped and looked over quickly, eventually letting out a sigh of relief once she realized that it was just her next-door neighbor, breck. “oh, hi.” she replied in mutters, now closing her journal to focus on him. “i do? i didn’t notice.” she replied to his playful question, now petting mr. timothy while speaking. once he asked if she wanted some coffee, she shrugged slightly. “maybe; i can’t tell if i’m too tired or not.”
without just blatantly staring at the girl, breckin takes in what he can and observes her movements. he even takes note of her journal and, somewhat begrudgingly, thinks about how he could get his hands on it. he would love to know what goes on in kianna’s mind. “as a fellow bio major, i can just about guarantee that you’re definitely too tired.” he smiles, standing from his seat. “be right back.” he throws out quickly as he slides his balcony door open and steps inside. he dumps his own coffee down the drain and washes out the cup before grabbing a clean mug and filling it with a fresh brew. he doesn’t add sugar or creamer though because he doesn’t own either. when he drinks coffee, it’s just straight black so he has no need for it. “hope you don’t mind something a little strong in the mornings.” he says as he steps back outside. there isn’t much space between his balcony and kianna’s, but he still has to stretch a little over the edge to hand her the cup of coffee. “i pretty much function on nothing but straight up black coffee so no sugar or anything.” he explains, leaning against the railing. his eyes glance down towards the cat tagging along with her and he nods at it. “nice cat.” he smiles. “what’s its name?”
the question has an easy answer - no. of course nami’s parents wouldn’t like breckin because he was a boy. yet, with a thoughtful squint, nami proceeds to vocalize one of his depressing fantasies. “they’d love you, duh. is that even an actual question? i can already see it. all the embarrassing stories about my childhood. god, and then after one conversation with my younger sister my mom would be demanding i propose on the spot. not that i’d be surprised. a very reasonable reaction after meeting you.” of course nami’s family wasn’t so picture perfect, but it wasn’t as if breckin would ever really know the truth. he wasn’t the one obsessed, here. nami was, and with that obsession came a need to make everything about a relationship between them sound like a dream. he was relieved to finally have breck’s full attention, the desperation in his chest finally fading as the conversation seemed to drag them both in. he hummed along, taking in everything breck told him. each bit of his past nami could get was essential to him, dragging him in deeper. “oh, yeah? church was a weekly thing for my family, so… i get where you’re coming from. the fear they really shove into your brain is kinda hard to shake. maybe you don’t believe in it, but you can’t help but have a voice in the back of your head pushing the what if you’re screwing yourself over by not even pretending you believe? you can’t really live based off that stupid fear though,” he said with a wave of his hand. “hm, i guess. depends on what you’d be, but i could confidently say if you were reborn into a puppy, i might be willing to adopt and take care of you. you’re welcome.”
if he were a normal person, he would be swooning over the things nami is saying. but, he’s not normal. and the only thing he’s thinking about now is that he really should try to get someone to propose to him. how fun would it be to completely destroy someone in one of their most vulnerable moments? “that’s sweet, nami.” he smiles. “but i highly doubt i’ll be getting proposed to at any point in this lifetime.” he says, breathing out a light laugh through his nose. “i would love to hear those embarrassing childhood stories though.” he teases, resting both arms atop the table as he leans forward. “yeah? so, do your parents know that you...” he trails off, waving his hand, “you know... like guys?” he asks. and this is something he doesn’t even have to pretend to be curious about because he genuinely is. he didn’t actually grow up with a pastor as a dad and he never once went to church so he really doesn’t have any experience with how it all works. maybe it would be nice to hear about firsthand experiences rather than those seen in movies. “i know it’s kinda dumb to live your life based off of something there’s no proof of, but it’s the only thing i know.” he shrugs. “sometimes i can’t help but think i’ve missed out on a lot of things because of it though. it makes me feel... bitter. and feeling bitter makes me feel guilty.” he sighs, dropping his gaze. “might?” he repeats with a laugh. “i’ll choose to take that as some sort of compliment so... thanks.” he shakes his head. “instead of a puppy though, i could be reborn as a billionaire or maybe as someone who lives in a completely different universe. maybe even an alien.”
“you’re the only person i have faith in,” which sounds like another line of dramatics, coming from him, but it’s genuine. he’s annoyed that breck hasn’t looked up at him yet, but he doesn’t comment on his lack of attention. instead he waits, impatience eating away at him. “i don’t know what you’re talking about,” he denies before he even knows what he’s being accused of. he was sure he did have a reputation, but he was usually too focused on himself to know what that reputation even was or consisted of. “people say all kinds of things,” he adds, a hint of defensiveness in his tone, “you can’t trust gossip - and just look at where gossiping gets people anyway. better to refrain,” he continued under his breath as a subtle reference to ingrid. he huffs now as breckin maintains his focus, which is what motivates zelan to move closer in an attempt to tempt him further. that seems to work, and soon he’s got a sense of satisfaction simply from having breckin’s eyes on him. “mm, can’t you though?” he hums, knowing that he’s already won now that he’s closing the book. “let’s break into the pool,” he suggests, a little too willing to add to the list of illegal things he’s done. “i hear it’s heated in the winter.”
zelan is right; you really can’t trust gossip. sometimes, breckin doesn’t listen to it because he doesn’t want to, because he doesn’t want the things people say about the other boy to be true. he would much rather live in his little bubble where the only person that has ever touched zelan is him. if he has to hear about the boy’s sexcapades one more time, he might actually lose it. and that would be embarrassing for everyone involved. “that’s pretty dark, z.” he scolds, albeit playfully, as he continues packing his things away into his backpack. “i said offer me something worthwhile.” he reminds, standing up to his full height and popping his back. “you didn’t offer shit.” he says, slipping both straps of his bag over his shoulders. “break into the pool? really?” he laughs. but he’s already walking towards the exit of the student lounge, not even bothering to check if zelan is following him; he knows he is anyway. “out of all the things we could do, that’s your suggestion?” he questions, though he’s smiling. “i guess we could do that though.” he shrugs. “lead the way.”
a low hum passed through grace’s pink lips as her eyes scanned back and forth across the microscopic text of her organic chemistry textbook. the soft hustle and bustle of the bellbrook college library buzzed around her, yet her attention was completely absorbed into the book in front of her. she had one of the biggest exams of her class coming up the next week and she had lost track of just how long she had been perched in her chair, papers and pens spread around her. beside her her laptop screen flashed black, an indicatoin of it’s battery dying. she silently cursed herself for not fighting for one of the tables with an outlet nearby. finally averting her attention away from the book she turned towards the person a table away from her “—um, do, uh, you mind?” she asked nervously sticking her cord out towards them nodding towards the outlet beside their chair, “s-sorry, i don’t mean to be a bother … ” she added the words coming out almost softer as she used her free hand to push her dark hair back.
as with most days, breckin curses himself for choosing to go down the route that would lead him to becoming a doctor. he’s so absorbed in studying and doing schoolwork that he doesn’t have time for most things; hell, he barely notices the things going on around him. so, that’s why, he knows he shouldn’t be surprised to hear grace’s voice sounding from somewhere next to him. he hadn’t even noticed her sit down which, to be honest, is mind boggling because the girl looks as if she stepped right out of a fashion magazine. he doesn’t show any of his shock though and, instead, slips on a smile as he prays to some unseen power that she isn’t too mad at him for ignoring her calls and texts. “no worries.” he waves her off as he takes the cord in hand and plugs it into the outlet. “if you’d like, you can come sit over here.” he offers, nodding his head towards the seat next to him. he even moves some of his things from the chair onto the floor just to show her that it’s free. “sorry about taking up the space.” he apologizes. “i was just so caught up in studying that i honestly didn’t even realize how many people were in here. you should’ve asked me to move it.”
“if you don’t get into it, how am i gonna figure out how to get it done…?” his words were slow and whiny as he complained in the form of a question, as though he couldn’t just as easily google to find out for himself. he had a habit of relying on breck a little too much whenever he was around. “you’re not gonna flunk out,” he says in response, rolling his eyes at the comment, though he doesn’t always understand the stress that falls on breckin. his major was much more demanding than the path zelan had chosen for himself, so it was common that he’d forget just how much more effort he had to put forward in comparison. “if you’re not there, what’s the point?” he questions with a dramatic sigh, “everyone else is boring.” and that’s not entirely true. in fact, he found out recently that there were a few that were far less boring than he expected, but he favored breckin over everyone else, and that’d probably always be true. “stop trying to get rid of me,” he pouted, getting up from where he’d been sitting at the table to approach breckin instead. “pleeease, can we do anything else?”
“glad you have so much faith in me.” he hums, highlighting another section. at this rate, he’ll be studying well into next year and, by that time, it’ll be too late. he really wishes he weren’t so stubborn that he decided to pursue medicine just so he could prove to his father that he was smart enough to be a doctor just like him; to prove that they weren’t so different after all. “now, i know that’s not true.” he laughs, shifting in the seat slightly just to relieve some of the tension on his back. “you act like i don’t hear stories about you, z. as if people don’t talk.” he quirks a brow, but keeps his gaze focused on the words in front of him. that is, of course, until zelan moves to stand in front of him and he has to look. he can’t just ignore the boy’s presence, no matter how badly he wishes he could. “zelan...” he sighs, dropping his head back against the chair. he wonders if the other knows that he can’t deny him when he’s pouting; he has to with how much he uses the tactic against him. “i really can’t afford to take a break right now.” he says, but he’s already closing his book. “make an offer and if it’s worth my while then i’ll humor you.” he teases, bending over to gather a few discarded books and highlighters on the floor.
in all the lengths nami was willing to go to for his previous interests, he thought that purposely stubbing his toe to earn breckin’s attention was pretty tame. sure, he could’ve just faked the entire injury, but he thought that the actual pain radiating through him was just a nice show of his dedication. “that doesn’t sound very believable,” nami casually pointed out, though he briefly wanted to pout as he wondered if that would be the end of it. all this… for one sentence of judgment. luckily, breckin was standing up, and nami did his best to swallow the satisfied hum. “too late. it’s all i know. blame my parents, give ‘em a call if you’d like? you definitely seem like the kinda boy i could bring home.” which would subsequently end in disaster regardless, but nami could imagine a world where it would go well. he had enough delusional dreams about breck that it wouldn’t be too abnormal to tie in having supportive parents with it. “anything.“ the question didn’t really shock him. it just left him opening and closing his mouth, his eyebrows furrowed. “believe in a guy that made someone like me so successful and happy with life? if he’s real, he’s pretty twisted.” though maybe nami could’ve ended up a good person… he didn’t. “like i said, they believe everything happens for a reason… it’s all god’s plan. so people are just meant to be miserable? murderers? that’s pretty fucked up. hard to worship a guy like that, or wanna hang with him. if it’s real, i think i might wanna hang out with satan more, anyways.” he caught the item with one hand, wiggling an eyebrow as if it were something to be impressed by. “maybe there is something. it’s a lot nicer to think that than just accepting that it’ll really be over, right? though, to me, the idea of nothing seems kind of peaceful. the world’s so fucking chaotic, it might be nice to stop existing after all this bullshit.” he waited a beat, before peering up again. “what about you?”
“oh?” he quirks a brow, a smile threatening to spill out across his features. he hates that something stirs deep inside of him at the prospect of nami taking him home to his parents. usually, when people get that invested, he’s able to break their hearts in unimaginable ways. the last person who took him home, he hurt them so bad that they ended up dropping out of school. looking down, he fiddles with the bottom of his button-up shirt, and pretends as if he’s shy even discussing it. “do you think your parents would like me?” he asks with a small smile. “i mean, hypothetically.” he’s quick to correct, raising his head and pushing a hand through his hair. however, when nami starts to answer his question, breckin has his full attention back on the boy, and moves closer to him as if he can’t hear him otherwise. listening to nami explain his views on god honestly resonates a lot with who breckin really is and he finds that if he were to just act like himself then they would have a lot in common. but that’s a problem. so, he’ll continue with his innocent act instead. “me?” he questions, sinking down into one of the chairs in the kitchen. “i dunno, it’s kinda complicated for me.” he says as he gathers his thoughts in order to slip into the lie he’s been spinning ever since he started college. he’s pretty good at it now though, has learned that you just have to stick to the truth as much as possible. “i can’t remember if i’ve told you, but you know my dad is a doctor, right?” he asks. “well, he’s also a pastor so i grew up believing in all that... bullshit. didn’t have any other choice.” he explains, sighing. “i’m not so sure though. a part of me would like to believe that there’s something after, but i don’t think there is. maybe reincarnation is real though. that’d be kinda cool, huh? to be reborn as someone different?”
clarissa’s life was like clockwork — wake up, get dressed, and go get the first of many coffees at the cafe around the corner. and this morning was no different. the sun was too bright, so she’d opted for a pair of oversized sunglasses and a baseball cap, both to hide herself from the sun but also to hide herself from PEOPLE. the less she had to speak to other’s, after the week she’d had, the better. she didn’t take off her little disguise even as she entered the coffee shop. the little ’ ding ! ’ of the door’s bell made her cringe as the barista turned to look at her. but she was relieved to see that the rest of the shop was empty.
she ordered the favorite frozen caramel coffee, slipped a small stack of dollar bills across the counter, and went to sit in the darkest and loneliest corner of the shop. she sipped her drink and scrolled mindlessly through her twitter feed when she heard the bell again. she froze when she heard a familiar voice talking to the barista, and prayed to any god that was listening that she wouldn’t be noticed.
anyone who knows breckin, the real breckin, knows that he absolutely despises coffee. but, still, he always finds himself in cafe after cafe searching for the very same thing he hates. what can he say? he enjoys the smell and it does help in keeping his eyes open when he wants nothing more than to just fall asleep forever. “i’ll pick you up at seven.” he winks at the girl he was walking with before pushing inside the shop. as he turns to enter, he rolls his eyes, and makes his way to the counter. his order is simple; coffee, black. and it takes the barista all of five seconds to deliver. he thanks her but, as he turns to leave, he spots a very familiar figure sitting at one of the tables. one that is obviously trying to stay hidden, but not trying hard enough. and he just loves to make people miserable so he walks his suddenly too happy ass right over. “shitty disguise, chief.” he comments, plopping down in the chair opposite clarissa. “the only way you could’ve possibly stood out more is if you slapped on a fake mustache.”
“who the fuck would ever think this is a good way to spend their time,” he grumbled in annoyance, staring at the pieces of the puzzle that were spread out on the table in front of him. maybe it would’ve been a better attempt if he wasn’t high, but with his current state there were maybe five pieces correctly connected; others were shoved together, forcing a fit, and there was an oddly stacked pile that he kept adding to for whatever reason on the side of it all. “you’ve got two choices,” he said, turning his attention to whoever happened to be in the student lounge at the same time, “finish it for me or distract me with something more exciting. i prefer the latter.”
breckin feels like such a cliche of a college student as he uses his yellow highlighter to mark through certain passages that he doesn’t understand. at this point, he’ll never pass any of his exams and all of his dreams of getting into med school will be dashed. it definitely doesn’t help when he’s sharing a space with zelan who can be, for lack of a better word, distracting. “there’s some kind of science behind it, but i don’t care enough to get into it right now.” he replies, rubbing at his temples. it’s not like he’s even frustrated with the other, he’s just frustrated in general. “or i can just continue to sit here and try not to flunk outta uni.” he proposes as he sinks further down into the padded chair. he has one leg slung over the arm and the other is outstretched so far in front of him that he’s surprised he hasn’t tripped anyone yet. “why are you even here anyway?” he rolls his head to the side, letting out a light laugh. “i know there’s a few parties happening tonight, you could go help them get set up or something if you’re that desperate for a little fun, z.”
“it’s fine… it’s just broken.” the statement was dramatic, his leg outstretched as he attempted to wiggle the now wounded big toe. it would have a perfectly fine recovery within the hour, but that didn’t make nami any less pouty over it. it was clearly his biggest concern, despite the recent events that he should have a guilty conscience over. no, stubbing his big toe was the priority. “do you think if i pray to god, he’ll make it stop? i mean, they say everything happens for a reason, but i really don’t see a groundbreaking lesson being learned here… unless the lesson is to get rid of the stupid side table. done! i hear you loud of clear, dude.” with that he wagged his finger up at the sky before turning his gaze onto the other. “if you get me ice, i’ll stop whining, so we’ll both win… or if you just pray with me, but the complaining will definitely continue. up to you!” he reached a hand out, wiggling his fingers to encourage them to come over and do so.
to be honest, breckin hasn’t been listening to anything nami has been saying or doing for the last hour or so because he’s had his nose stuck in a book attempting to study. although, he did look up for a brief moment when the other stubbed his toe; if only to just laugh. “i think you should just learn to deal with it. you’re not always gonna have someone so willing to be at your beck and call.” he states, folding the edge of the current page before closing the book. “you shouldn’t get used to it.” he adds, sliding off the couch. normally, breckin wouldn’t even humor him with this but something he’s said has caught his attention. “lemme ask you something.” he says, padding over to his refrigerator. “do you believe in god?” he questions, bluntly. opening the freezer, he sifts around inside, but only comes up with a bag of peas. it’s cliche, sure, but it’ll do. “no ice, but this should do the trick.” he voices, tossing the item towards the other. “or do you believe that when we die, there’s just nothing? or maybe there is something, but it isn’t some paradise in the sky or some burning prison underground.” he says as he crosses his arms over his chest, and leans against the counter.
☆ — who : @kicnna
☆ — when : march of 2019
☆ — where : lake isla apartment complex
he can pretend that he doesn’t sit out on his balcony with the pure intention of having a conversation with kianna, but that would be a blatant lie. in fact, it’s the sole reason he does so. he has no desire to do things like this; things that are so reminiscent of domesticity. he also hates drinking coffee, yet, he still sits in the uncomfortably poor excuse of a lawn chair with a black mug in hand. though, when he hears the familiar slide of the doors to his left, his head snaps up so quickly that he swears he’s given himself whiplash and he quickly forgets his complaints. but, he plays it off; he smiles. “morning, neighbor.” he greets, shielding his eyes from the sun. “you’re looking awfully alive for this time of day. what’s your secret?” he quirks a brow. and he wonders if she catches the double meaning. she does look incredibly beautiful and well put together for someone who probably just woke up, but he also wishes he knew more about her aside from what she shows. she may be the most mysterious person he’s ever met; one of the few he just can’t seem to figure out. “you want some coffee?” he asks, holding up his own mug. “i made a little too much.”
in all forms except physical i can write an intro, know that ( ! ) i’m mikhia, you can call me mikki if you want tho idc lmao, i’m eighteen, and i live my life by the word of park sooyoung. in her name we pray, amen! i’m always tryna come up with some kind of witty intro but LMAO that never happens and probs never will so this is it.......... this is what y’all get! if you wanna plot then read this shit and gimme a mf smash of that heart and i’ll hit you up! or, if you prefer plotting on d.iscord then you can find me over at YUKHEI’S WHITE GIRL LAUGH #5355 just like tell me who you are when i add you!
▶ BASIC INFORMATION
breckin rhee isn’t as innocent as he seems. on the outside they’re just another twenty-one year old junior who’s looking to get through college with a degree in biology, but let me be the first to tell you there’s more than meets the eye. although they were ingrid’s party buddy, they were the one who held her still while she was bound and gagged. hopefully nobody finds out what they did!
▶ BULLET POINT BACKGROUND
the following overview contains triggering topics such as abuse, drug use, manipulation, and murder. if any of these topics make you uncomfortable then please click away as your well being is a lot more important than the background of my character. however, just as an fyi, none of the topics are talked about in depth, just more-so mentioned!
growing up it was just breckin and his dad living in a big, isolated house at the end of a road where no one really cared to get to know one another. he never knew what happened to his mom, but he also never asked. him and his dad didn’t have the kind of relationship for that; him and his dad were never close enough to have personal conversations.
the two of them only spoke a handful of words to each other by the time the boy was ten and had been completely raised by a nanny. but then everything changed when she just didn’t show up one day and his dad decided to play the role of a parent for once. and, just like with his mom, he had no idea what happened to his former parental figure.
he was shit at it (go figure) and constantly yelled at breckin, even pushing him around and smashing his toys just cause he felt like it. he didn’t understand what he had ever done wrong and a part of him thought that this was just how every parent treated their child.
when he was twelve, he ended up finding an old camcorder and instantly fell in love with filming everything around him. it all looked so beautiful through a lens; untainted. but he was young and kids can be dumb. he ended up recording over one of the tapes inside and when his dad found out, he completely lost it.
apparently breckin had taped over an old home video of his mom, one that his dad watched frequently, and it became the catalyst for events that would change his life forever. it was the first time his dad was ever physically abusive towards him.
he doesn’t really have much memory of the event, but he does remember being at the top of the stairs filming before everything went black. he found out later that his dad had pushed him down the stairs, but it was ruled an accident and he was put back into his care after he healed.
things only got worse from there with his dad constantly telling him that he was a monster, that no one would ever love him, and that no one would care if he died. these things clawed their way down his throat and found a home in his lungs until he felt like he could no longer breathe.
as he got older and a little colder, he started fighting back and it ended up just being a big brawl between him and his dad all the time. they would literally beat the shit out of each other multiple times a week until, suddenly, it all stopped when he was sixteen.
his dad remarried and the woman brought in two younger children. then, suddenly, his dad was someone else entirely. it was like the bitter old man had been replaced by the most wholesome being in the world. he acted like a completely different person and it pissed breckin off. but it also inspired him in a way; it changed his outlook on the world around him entirely.
so he changed his personality too, became the picture perfect son who played sports and got good grades. he held up his image well, but the monster his father always told him he was never went away. it just waited under his facade until the perfect time to strike.
it was after his first real girlfriend that he decided he liked hurting people. he liked breaking their hearts because it made him feel like a god. he was the perfect boyfriend, dating girls and boys and anyone that was dumb enough to fall for his tricks. he would make sure that he was all they thought about, that they were sure they were in love with him, and then he would rip the rug right out from under them.
nothing made him happier than watching them cry and beg him not to do this. they looked so ugly and broken and he couldn’t think of anything more beautiful. he liked seeing people at their most vulnerable, got off on humiliating them.
it was around that same time that he also got into drugs, cocaine specifically, and it helped to perk him up; it helped to make him not look so dead inside. he was a great actor, but the eyes are the window to the soul and his held nothing inside.
with his new life planned out, breckin made the decision to go to college and major in biology with the hopes of getting into med school and becoming a doctor like his father. in some weird way, it was almost like he wanted to be just like him, to show him that he was only monster because of him.
it was at his high school graduation that he found out what really happened to his mother when she suddenly showed up trying to act like everything was ok. in his mind, he had already come to terms with her death, deciding that his father more than likely killed her. but the truth hurt a whole lot more. she had just left........ left him with a monster who didn’t love him. and, not only that, but she had a whole new family with two children (his half siblings) and one of them was even close to him in age. it enraged him and, so, the next morning he cut the brake line in her car and killed her off permanently. she was dead to him so dead she would stay.
when he left for uni, he constructed a backstory where he was the son of a pastor who graduated as valedictorian and blushed when complimented. none of that was true, but it didn’t matter. everyone would believe him and would never question it so it didn’t matter.
at freshman orientation, he found his first victim and really set everything back into motion. he began dating anyone and everyone before ultimately cheating on them, and breaking their hearts in the worst possible way all while holding up his perfect little persona until the end.
it was a cruel game, but he was able to keep others quiet about who he really was either through blackmail or through them being so humiliated that they left school and moved away.
over the years though as he’s gotten busier and has gotten closer to graduating, he’s really been too exhausted to keep up his facade as much so he’s basically half himself and half good church goin boy lmao!
▶ LIST OF SECRETS
obviously no one knows about these (unless we’ve plotted something out surrounding them) so keep these to your ooc self beetch! i honestly just wanted to throw ‘em down here because my memory is shit!
breckin plans on going to med school after graduation so, in preparation for becoming a doctor down the road, he will oftentimes practice on willing peers who are looking for a little extra cash.
he has a weird obsession with death but, more specifically, what comes after. it’s something that no one knows the answer to so he has taken it upon himself to try and figure it out. how, you ask? think flatliners. he hooks himself (and other people occasionally) to a machine then injects them with a drug to stop their heart. they die, the two minute countdown begins, then they’re resuscitated. he’s been getting a little too brave lately though and letting himself flatline for longer periods of time.
even though those two things in particular could get him not only kicked out of school, but ruin his chances of getting into med school, there are others that would pretty much bury his entire reputation six feet under. since he was in his early teens, breckin has been living a sort of double life. he pretends to be a nice boy who only has good intentions, but he couldn’t be more opposite. he loves breaking hearts, hurting others, and humiliating them. more often than not, he dates people solely for that.
even though he doesn’t need the money, he loves attention so he started up his very own little artistic porn blog on tumblr (throw it back to when that shit was still allowed). he began when he was a freshman and has accumulated around forty thousand followers in that time. he never shows his face or anything but he posts pretty racy photos and sells pictures, videos, and audio recordings to those that are willing to pay.
breckin has a very packed schedule between studying pre-med, playing sports, and keeping up with all of his other extracurricular activities that he doesn’t find much time to do normal things like sleeping, eating, etc. this has pushed him to find other means to sustain him that mostly include divulging in various drugs of choice.
▶ POTENTIAL PLOT IDEAS
these are just barebone ideas that could and should be expanded on. but, again, they’re only ideas and i’m really open to plotting just about anything? especially if you have smth in particular that you really want filled, please don’t be afraid to come to me about it! all plots are also open to any muse of any gender!
TEAMMATE(S) — breck is really into sports (specifically more aggressive ones) so if your muse plays any such as: football, lacrosse, hockey, etc then hmu! we can do full blown rivals, playful rivals, mates who just help keep each other motivated to do their best, etc.
HALF SIBLING — if you read the background info then you’ll know that breck’s mom pretty much disappeared then showed back up with two new kids who are his half siblings. however, one of them is pretty close to his age so it’d be cool to have them around? especially considering the fact that he ended up killing their mother yikes! even though they obvs don’t know that it could make for some good writing to explore them finding it out in the future!
ROMANTIC(?) — i’m talkin fwb, exes that he’s played, one night stands, etc. considering the fact that his schedule has only gotten busier and busier, he doesn’t really have time to date around like he used to but he still has needs, damn, so essketit!
PARTY BUDDY — breck likes to party a lot and likes to get fucked up so he needs some friends who’ll humor him and who can keep up with all of his wild shenanigans.
DRUG DEALER — with the amount of shit he does (both personally and otherwise) he could keep your character completely funded himself lmao! hes got a lot of money so let his dumbass give it to you!
NEIGHBOR(S) — breck doesn’t live on campus cause fuck that hes too old for it and he hated it anyway so he lives in an apartment which means your muse? could be his neighbor idk this is super vague but we could do a lot with it just trust me!
SECRETS(?) — considering a couple of his secrets are a little out there it’d be kinda cool to have someone in on them. like, with his whole experimenting on people thing and basically killing them then bringing them back to see what they experienced ya....... could be fun literally someone gimme it!
