soulbound

as long as the sea is bound to wash upon the sand and the stars are above you, we will meet again.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

he wasn’t biased. someday he will show xie lian he was worth more than he saw himself. “some.” he replied softly. “but the things that are important to me, i carry with me, always.” he didn’t blame xie lian for not remembering. he saw the prince suffer through so much, some memories deserved to stay hidden. yet he couldn’t resist asking about one. “i do wonder, gege. do you remember before you first ascended, the great parade in front of your palace?”

what kind of question was that? for all things seemed like they had finally fallen into place, xie lian felt as though he was still grasping for something missing. “my...coronation parade?” the memory was a little clearer than the others, but they didn’t set the bar very high to begin with. xie lian searched hua cheng’s gaze inquisitively, forgetting where they were and how close they were for the moment. “i...dropped my mask.” he remembered several things dropping, but that was the most important one. “we had to stop. mother and father weren’t very happy.” that was the only reason the memory stood out -- disappointing his parents had been his only regret. otherwise, the whole affair had been grandiose to the point of embarrassing. xie lian bit his lip. “why?”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

the absence of his dianxia’s lips ushered in the coolness of the room and for a minute it was just like the moment he lost him again. but hua cheng gently brushed a strand of hair from xie lian’s temple and reminded himself this was his second chance. this was his home, not his palace or even the shrine. it was xie lian. “you’re the smartest person i know, dianxia,” he quirked a smile but his answer was truthful and fond. “just forgetful at times.”

“biased,” xie lian huffed, but he could not deny the warmth that hua cheng’s tone seeped his heart in. he reached up and caught hua cheng’s hand before the other could lower it, his thumb rubbing warmth into hua cheng’s palm. it was a dazed motion, like xie lian expected to blink away from a dream at any time, but hua cheng remained in front of him, real, solid. “you’ve lived nearly as long as i have. tell me there aren’t some things that slip your recollection too,” he murmured.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng’s gaze never left xie lian, waiting. calculating. he catalogued his every movement, waiting for the moment the other man would push him away…only for him to be kissed instead. 

hua cheng felt his nerves flare. xie lian tasted of sweet plum and something distinctly living, a radiance that hua chang had waited almost a millennium for. he exhaled against xie lian’s lips and pressed closer to deepen the kiss, his eyes slipping closed. he wanted to kiss the trembling out of xie lian, fill him with nothing but love.

hua cheng’s small sigh was like a blanket, smoothing over his errant thoughts. xie lian had a moment to wonder, perhaps we want the same, before he shut away all thoughts completely, pulled hua cheng closer to him, and simply kissed back.

he felt warm, like all the cold he’d carried through the rubble of his kingdom and all those starving streets and that awful, awful lake was being slipped off of him. he couldn’t name it, but something seemed to finally slot into place. xie lian exhaled shakily, his lower back bumping into the edge of something -- the table, likely -- and prompting him to break the kiss to catch his breath. his unfocused gaze chose to anchor on hua cheng’s collarbone. “hua cheng,” he said, words meek but decided. “i’m not very smart, am i?”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

“xie lian.” the name passed hua cheng’s lips lowly. “i do not mock you. you asked me to be truthful about what i want, and so i am.” he was unconsciously gripping xie lian’s arm, afraid he would actually run. hua cheng wore confidence like a second skin but for a second there was a crackling hint of a scared boy. “what i want to kiss you again.”

as if xie lian was aware of a world outside of this moment that he could run to. he swallowed. what was more frightening -- that hua cheng was playing a trick, or that hua cheng meant it? xie lian hesitated.

he leaned in first this time, and none of his ascensions could hold a candle to when he granted hua cheng’s request a second time. it was an exceedingly gentle kiss, almost shy. he could feel his hands shaking, and he gripped one of them in the loose fabric of hua cheng’s outer robe.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

“all right, dianxia,” hua cheng murmured with a soundless sigh. “no more games.” it seemed nothing else would convince him. hua cheng cupped xie lian’s jaw, tilted his face up, and gently pressed their lips together.

there was no opportunity to respond before hua cheng’s lips were on his, and xie lian's noise of surprise was muffled by the kiss. hua cheng’s lips were soft, cold but with the promise of warmth, but xie lian jerked back almost as quickly as hua cheng had leaned in. “what-- why would you--” he felt miserable for how much he wanted to flee and how much he wanted to simply forget what meanings meant, for hua cheng to simply do it again. “don’t mock my feelings, san lang, please.”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng pursed his lips. he thought xie lian wanted his honesty, but his words seemed to be making things worse. “yes.” he decided to respond. but he made sure to correct, “because i want to.”

at that response, xie lian’s lips twitched into a deeper frown. “san lang, no more games. i asked you to be truthful with me.”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng raised an eyebrow at the rather bold question from the crown prince who couldn’t even look him in the eye only minutes ago. “because i want to,” he answered patiently, “because i want to, and because i want to.” he ran his thumb over the back of xie lian’s knuckles. “does that answer satisfy, dianxia?”

xie lian blinked. he stared at hua cheng, and then he blinked again, like it might disrupt the veil of the dream that this surely had to be. “because you wanted to,” he echoed slowly. "that-- that’s it?” had the kiss simply been a whim for hua cheng, when it had been xie lian’s first? hurt pricked at him, and he was sure his tone was loudly proclaiming it.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

a small sigh filtered from his lips, “we are all ghosts and dead things there. they hardly need my affection, nor i theirs,” he said coldly. “i had nothing else to do that day and so i came for you, i already said. but as for the rest, why is it so difficult for you to believe that i call you my dianxia because i believe you are deserving of it, and that i truly want nothing in return?”

“because--” xie lian cut himself off tightly, feeling as though he was getting nowhere. conversing with hua cheng often felt like that night in the gambler’s den, only able to see the vaguest shape of the other through the crimson red veneer, but never the finer details. “is it only the undead whose affection you don’t need, then? why have you been travelling with me? why have you been helping me? why did you kiss me in that lake?” and there, it was out. xie lian was beyond flustering -- he simply wanted to know.

[andthelovers]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng tilted his head. “material things.” he said. “and neither your fault. but even if they were, everything that is mine is mine, and i do with them as i wish. i shall give them to dianxia if i so choose.”

xie lian frowned. “you have a city, your people– and you insist on calling me dianxia when i haven’t honored that title in centuries. you tell me you expect nothing in return, yet there are times when you speak to me as though you’re waiting for something, and i do not know what.” frustration crept into the edge of his tone, and he reached up and lowered hua cheng’s hand from his cheek. “be truthful, san lang, that’s all i’d ask of you. why did you really come for me on that mountain?”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng’s face turned slightly softer at xie lian’s answer. he was only joking, he never meant to hurt his dianxia’s feelings. “dianxia.” he took xie lian’s hand instead. he smiled softly and cupped xie lian’s cheek. “i assure you, i never expect anything in return. everything of mine is yours. it’s all for you.” all of it. even if xie lian didn’t remember a bit of their past.

was that meant to make it better? xie lian’s flush was growing worse, but he couldn’t find it in him to put any distance between them either. there’d been a pull about hua cheng since xie lian first encountered him on that road -- as if they hadn’t met, but rather met again. as if xie lian had known him for lifetimes and lifetimes past already. “and i assure you, i’ve done nothing to deserve such a promise,” he said quietly, looking up at hua cheng. “really, san lang. all i’ve done is caused chaos in your realm and... destroyed your armory.” he winced, remembering all of the precious weapons that had been lost just like that, mere moments after san lang gifted them to him.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng cocked an eyebrow in amusement. technically he was younger but he towered easily over his dianxia, so it was a little funny. he tugged with the arm xie lian was currently holding, so the other man came closer. “i consider this place my second home, if not my true one,” he said innocently. “our home. why should i not be allowed to take care of it?”

xie lian did stumble forward, but hua cheng’s turn of phrase stoppered the retort that had been on the tip of his tongue. “when you say it like that--” he mumbled, his grip easing on the other man’s sleeve. he couldn’t look at hua cheng suddenly, struck by the same feelings that had stung him when hua cheng kissed him in that lake. when hua cheng joked about marriage. when hua cheng laughed it off so easily. “you’ve just done so much for me already, is all. it’s...to the point where i don’t know if i can ever repay you.”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

“hm,” hua cheng said, his eye glinting with mischief. he slowly held the broom out…then swept the floor in front of xie lian. “don’t step in the dust, dianxia,” he said and walked right around him.

xie lian sputtered, spinning around and grabbing the other man’s hand without really thinking. “san lang, please--” when he realized just what he’d done, he almost threw off hua cheng’s arm in panic-- only to remember his manners just in time. he cleared his throat, resolutely ignoring the flush that had bloomed in his cheeks. “please give me the broom.”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng watched his sword preen at the silk ribbon that made its way over. hm. e-ming could be shameless. “whatever dianxia wants.” he decided, smiling back. since xie lian looked protective of the kitchen right now, hua cheng simply took up the broom by the wall and began sweeping the floor of the shrine instead. it wasn’t as messy as xie lian made it out to be, hua cheng saw worse at ghost city every day, but the shrine of a heavenly official should be clean. especially since it was his dianxia’s.

xie lian had turned his attention to start a pot of boiling water, trusting hua cheng to be able to find a seat alone, but clearly he’d placed too much faith in the famed ghost king. at the sound of bristles sweeping along the floor, he turned and was immediately dismayed by the sight of hua cheng, his guest, cleaning. “san lang!” the pot was promptly abandoned. “give that to me, what did i just say.” he planted himself in front of hua cheng, thrusting out a hand for the broom.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng watched the man scurry to the kitchen. an amused chuckle floated from his lips, “always so hospitable, gege. i arrived not too long ago, don’t worry. something to eat sounds good, but please let me help.” he stood. e-ming lay sheathed still, but when he stood up he felt its eye open and begin to tremble in excitement. hua cheng clicked his tongue and laid it against the wall for now. he began to roll his sleeves up. “what are we making? shall i start washing?”

“absolutely not,” xie lian chided as he brought over a basket of vegetables. he made sure to place it on the side of the sink away from hua cheng, recalling all the times hua cheng had found ways to weasel past him. “you’re my guest, san lang. please just sit.” he gestured to the table before tugging his sleeves back as well. he extended his hand, and ruoye unraveled from his wrist and loftily made his way to join e-ming. xie lian resolved to keep a side eye on those two.  “mung bean soup, how does that sound?” he asked, smiling cheerfully at hua cheng.

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

hua cheng looked up when the door finally opened and xie lian walked in. he hadn’t spotted the the other man when he first arrived, so he thought to wait. he even changed from his regal wear to the usual robes xie lian saw him in, a simple white inner robe layered with a red one. now that xie lian was here, he smiled lazily, straightening and propping his elbows casually on bent knees. “dianxia. forgive me, i thought you said i was welcome whenever i wished…?”

hua cheng’s answer gave him pause, and xie lian hesitated before he finally slipped his hat off with a chuckle. “i... yes, i suppose i did. you are welcome, please don’t be mistaken!” but i was expecting you to seek me in emergencies... surely hua cheng had urgent business running his realm than visiting his dianxia who did not really feel he fit the title anymore. “i, ah-- i just really wasn’t expecting to have anyone over, so please excuse the mess.” xie lian hurried next to the small kitchen, trying to recall the last time he’d gone out for supplies. it wasn’t as recent as he’d like, but he could make something, he was sure. “when did you arrive? would you like something to eat?”

[bvrialmounds]

@mstiqued | xie lian swiped the back of his hand over his forehead, closing an eye against the overbearing heat of the sun. his back and shoulders ached, riding the border between satisfying evidence of hard work and i will surely regret this for days, but only a quarter of the field remained to be planted now, and he was certain he could finish it after a brief rest.

he allowed his bamboo hat to slip back as he ducked into puqi shrine, a small sigh fluttering past his lips at the shade. only then, he was quite dumbfounded to see an surprising but not unwelcome figure of red. “san lang,” xie lian called, his steps quickening. the shrine was in its typical state of disarray, and he was mortified to see san lang lounging on a mat when clutter laid so close to him. “has something happened in the ghost city? are you all right?”

[bvrialmounds]

mstiqued‌:

“didn’t bribe him.” only wei ying can elicit a response from his tongue quicker than he can mull it over. lan wangji feels his ears lightly flush at the implication of wei ying’s accusation. he wants to ask. is he yours? even though it’s ridiculous for a child to be conceived and birthed in three months. the irrational question vies for his attention, the other contender is wei ying’s presence itself. weeks of wondering and lan wangji now faces him but cannot say a word, his tongue as useless as it was the night on qiongqi way. has it been this way for wei ying too? it would seem not, as the other man has no problem referring to him. yet lan wangji cannot be upset, only hoping, perhaps naively, that it is a sign nothing between them has changed, and wei ying will say yes if lan wangji were to ask him to come back to gusu with him.

“please pick him up.” his lips tighten briefly. considering. the child–a-yuan, apparently–glances up at him. lan wangji feels something in him soften. he does not like that the child wept because of him. “wei wuxian.”

wei wuxian’s smile fades before it can really unfurl in earnest. he had thought himself surefooted in navigating lan wangji’s reactions and non-reactions before, but perhaps he’d simply fallen into his habitual hubris: he couldn’t tell why the other man stares at a-yuan like so, why he insists upon calling him by this name.

“all right, all right, don’t get start getting upset with me,” he says, mild. for a-yuan, he tells himself. he gently eases a-yuan’s little hands from lan wangji’s robes, encouraging the boy to wrap them around his shoulders instead. in one rustle, wei ying stands with the child in his arms. “what trouble brings you so far from home now, lan zhan?”

keep steady. it can only be cultivation that brings him here. wei wuxian’s thumb strokes circles over a-yuan’s rumpled clothes. surely lan wangji must go on his way soon, and so must they -- yet wei wuxian cannot bring his feet to take the first step away.