Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ā Ā Ā maths. Ā Ā ā Ā Ā he Ā mumbledĀ plainly Ā before Ā turning Ā around Ā to Ā face Ā the Ā boy. Ā ah, Ā betram Ā aubrey. Ā the Ā poor Ā sod Ā with Ā the Ā giant Ā head. Ā although, Ā adieĀ thought Ā sadly, Ā itās Ā back Ā to Ā normal Ā size Ā again. Ā ā Ā Ā ye Ā paint Ā Ā ? Ā Ā draw Ā Ā ? Ā Ā sketch Ā Ā ? Ā Ā tap Ā fuckinā Ā dance Ā Ā ? Ā Ā ā Ā Ā adie Ā thought Ā momentarily Ā about Ā kicking Ā him Ā out, Ā but Ā he Ā remained Ā silent, Ā even Ā going Ā so Ā far Ā as Ā to Ā offer Ā him Ā a Ā smirk. Ā they Ā werenāt Ā supposed Ā to Ā be Ā alone Ā anyway. Ā bleh.
ā --- ha, ā bertram said dryly in response to the other boyās murmured quip, standing back to regard the canvas with an officious sort of interest.Ā ā --- none of the above, in fact. i find i gain no gratification in such pursuits. i prefer to fill my time with more PRACTICAL pastimes.Ā ā he paused, wondering if his words could be taken as offense. he wasnāt very good at these sorts of things.Ā ā --- not to say, of course, that they are completely useless, ā he amended.Ā ā --- iām sure individuals such as yourself may find great satisfaction in them. ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā mcgonagall Ā had Ā some Ā sort Ā of Ā alarm Ā in Ā her Ā headĀ Ā Ā Ā Ā mustāve Ā been Ā why Ā she Ā always Ā wore Ā such Ā large Ā hats Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā because Ā she Ā had Ā taken Ā quite Ā an Ā interest Ā in Ā adie Ā as Ā of Ā late. Ā he Ā would Ā catch Ā her Ā staring Ā at Ā him Ā in Ā the Ā halls, Ā watching Ā the Ā milk Ā heād Ā pour Ā at Ā breakfast, Ā no Ā doubt Ā suspicious Ā that Ā it Ā was Ā something Ā else Ā going Ā into Ā his Ā morning Ā coffee. Ā it Ā was Ā a Ā little Ā annoying, Ā but Ā at Ā least Ā she Ā allowed Ā him Ā an Ā independent Ā study Ā break. Ā she Ā probably Ā thought Ā he Ā would Ā lose Ā it Ā entirely Ā if Ā he Ā couldnāt Ā concentrate Ā on Ā the Ā things Ā that Ā interested Ā him: Ā like Ā putting Ā black Ā on Ā white Ā canvas. Ā Ā āĀ Ā Ā ocupado Ā Ā ! Ā Ā Ā ā Ā Ā Ā he Ā shouted Ā lazily Ā as Ā he Ā studied Ā the Ā large Ā charcoal Ā drawing Ā in Ā front Ā of Ā him. Ā it Ā was Ā so Ā tall, Ā in Ā fact, Ā that Ā he Ā often Ā had Ā to Ā sit Ā on Ā his Ā broom Ā to Ā reach Ā different Ā parts Ā of Ā the Ā project. Ā Ā āĀ Ā Ā student Ā outreach Ā program Ā anā Ā stuff.Ā Ā iām Ā learninā.Ā Ā Ā ā Ā Ā Ā his Ā scottish Ā accent Ā was Ā thick Ā as Ā always, Ā made Ā worse Ā given Ā how Ā nonchalant Ā he Ā was.
ā --- a student outreach program ? ā bertram repeated skeptically, eyeing the boyās canvas.Ā ā --- iāve never heard of it. for which class ?Ā āĀ he didnāt quite understand art, but he knew it was proven to help in some sort of psychological way, and he could appreciate the hard work that went into it. except that pollock fellow. bertram could not appreciate his paintings.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā it was all andromeda could think about ā the image of her practically falling all over him in the middle of such a public space. what was she THINKING ?Ā Ā no ā the problem here was that she hadnāt been thinking. sheād just been another stupid teenager so caught up in the idea of freedom that she forgot she was always going to be caged. she could barely drag herself out of bed that morning. too afraid that the moment she stepped foot in the halls, a match of rumours would be lit and she would end up on fire. but of course, she couldnāt stay in bed all day. and so she tried her best to blend into the walls, walking and eating and reading in silence, all alone, not even saying hello to a single soul she passed. and she almost made it, too. was almost about to sneak back to her dorm and tuck herself into the privacy of her own bed. if only she hadnāt been so stupid as to run straight into someone in the middle of the staircase.Ā Ā āĀ bugger ā shit,Ā āĀ Ā she hissed, bending down quickly to collect her books and hopefully move on just as the staircase started shifting, leading her in the completely wrong direction.Ā Ā āĀ shit, shit, shitĀ āĀ ā
there was a hungover haze that hung over the castle that day, one that bertram had thankfully escaped from, due to his own admirable foresight and prudence. although he understood many things, he did not understand his peersā preoccupation with alcohol and drugs. heād gone to the party expecting not to enjoy it, and had stayed for approximately five minutes before deciding that as per usual, he had been correct. so, he had left. and a good thing, too, judging by how miserable the castleās occupants seemed this morning. he was just thinking that when andromeda black walked straight into him, books cascading everywhere. he automatically knelt to help collect them, standing and presenting them to her officiously.Ā ā --- perhaps you should invest in a book bag ? ā
ā ā when i won the spelling bee in third grade. sarah goldstein thought she was guaranteed the title, with her colourful flash cards. HA ! what a fool. i could spell circles around her. and i did. flash cards arenāt everything, sarah. ā
NICO MIRALLEGRO āā well, if it isnāt BERTRAM AUBREY, the HUFFLEPUFF superstar. for those of you who donāt know HIM, you can spot them sitting with the other SEVENTH years. most people think that theyāre CANDID and RESILIENT, but they can also seem pretty SELF-RIGHTEOUS and PESSIMISTIC. sometimes people call them the PEDANT. sure, theyāre a MUGGLEBORN, but that doesnāt define them.
this intro is gonna be messy as fuck im warning you already
heās got a pinterest board but it doesnt have much on it yetĀ
wow. what an asshole.
ok so the only canon thing known about bertram is that james & sirius hexed his head to grow to twice its usual size and i think thatās so fucking funny
can u say chip on his shoulder? legally blonde style? was born to a father who dropped out of high school and now works in construction and a mother who wanted to become a teacher but left that dream behind when she unexpectedly became pregnant with bertram when she was 19. bertramās parents did love him but they really never had a lot growing up and it caused a significant amount of stress on the fam
so obviously they were like all super shocked when bertram was magic and was approached to come to hogwarts and shit especially cause like neither of his parents had gone to university or anything ? so bertram vowed not to fuck up this chance
has a little sister who heās hella protective over
his parents divorced a couple years ago and even though it was a long time coming heās still like .... very salty about itĀ
heās like ..... percy weasley mixed with ron swanson and uhhh lil bit of xander harrisĀ
people are always surprised heās not in ravenclaw cause heās smart af and works hard af to get good grades af lmao and then theyāre always more surprised heās in hufflepuff especially since heās uh... how do u say...... a bit of a DICKĀ
but his values are very hufflepuff. he values honesty and fairness and hard work
has very high standards. for everyone. will judge the fuck out of you if you donāt meet those standards. like if you slack even a little bit ? get ready for bertram to be pompous as fuck and go on some self-important condescending lecture. i h8 him
very practical, very down to earth. has no time for fairytale stories or puppy love or really anything that doesnāt have a useful application in the real world.Ā
heās like weird cause heās pessimistic in that he doesnāt believe people will naturally do the right thing but like, he believes that they should and they can. like he doesnāt expect much out of people but still holds them to high standards
he doesnāt lie. like. he doesnāt. for one thing he couldnāt if he tried, but he also values honesty like a ridiculous amount and can often be very blunt while sticking to these values
you know that gifset of like prince charming chris pine from into the woods where heās like āi was raised to be charming not sincereā? itās the opposite for bertram. sincere not charming. sorry folks heās nobodyās prince charming
like heās an asshole but u gotta give him credit, he sticks to what he believes and heās not afraid to share those beliefs. itās gotten him in a sticky spot quite a few times but heās also very clever with his words and can often talk himself out of it which is good cause he canāt fight for shit. someone kick his ass please
i donāt have words for how self-righteous he is ok i know i talked about this a bit already but i need you guys to know heās a pompous self-righteous asshole. like youāll see his good qualities and then be likeĀ āoh maybe heās not that badā but then he also sees his good qualities and points them out to u and ur like shut up bertram
doesnāt apologize easily but when he does he means it. like if youāve ever had bertram apologize to you itās so funny he gets so solemn about itĀ
you know that john mulaney bit where heās likeĀ āget out of here with your facts. youāre like the kid at the sleepover who after midnight is likeĀ āitās tomorrow nowā. get the fuck out of here with your technicalities. just cause youāre accurate does not mean youāre interesting. like hey why donāt you get your sleeping bag and GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. take your goddamn epipen and gET OUT OF MY HOUSEāĀ
thats bertram. heās the kid at the sleepover
but if you need help, heāll give it to you. he might be annoying and condescending about it but heāll be there for you whenever you need him. and heās so so so loyal to those who are close with himĀ
like, heās a good guy, deep down. deep deep down. he values fairness and honesty so even if he has the chance to have an advantage that might be considered unfair he wonāt take it, and idk heāll stick his neck out for people who are strugglingĀ
and heās faced a fair amount of shit in his life for idk being the way he is and also for being a muggleborn but he just shrugs it off and keeps going
i love him. but i hate him. someone take the stick out of his ass. or just kick his ass, that works too
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