Crisis averted. Not that Neo knows it was ever a crisis in the first place but at least he’s definitely glad that foreign and quite frankly nightmare-inducing face wasn’t present on her anymore. Whatever prompted such a response was going to have to be investigated in full if they…no, when they made it out of here.
“It’s to be expected, you’re good! I wish there was something more I could do for you about it though but…I guess you’re holding up well enough, huh?” He’s not completely certain of that, but he’s not quite sure if she’s willing to let him pry. Maybe he’d have to lead into it somehow…
Neo listens to the rest of what Tsukasa has to say, but rest assured he’s taking it to heart and not fervently denying everything he’s ever done. Even he’s not that silly to say he’s done nothing…But a part of him does think the blunette is giving him a little too much credit. “I understand, but it’s just… I should have known so much better, you know? In hindsight, I just wanted to save Isamu-kun so I didn’t pause to consider that what I did could have consequences on everyone else. Tunnel vision and everything…it feels like even if it doesn’t reverse all the good I’ve done, I should still hold myself accountable for it.”
Then she brings his hands up to kiss them, and it’s that gesture of affection that sparks something within him. A dam that’s nearly overflowing does just that, and even though he laughs it sounds emptier than it should be coming from Neo.
“I guess I did want to find you so that we could talk but…I’d be lying if I said that was the only reason. When I had that nightmare, I…I knew I had to get up. I had to leave that closet. And find people. Find my friends. Find you.”
Without him realizing it, he starts to tear up.
“It’s…It’s because you’re not there. No one is. You know what I’m scared of so… My nightmares are a vision of my death, isolated, abandoned and always completely alone. With no one left to love, and no one left to live for too. I’m making the choice to entrust this to you…because I’m not going to pretend to say that everything’s fine. I don’t want to go back to sleep, I don’t want to think about how fitting it is considering our situation, and I don’t want to lie to anyone that I’m unaffected by it even though I’m supposed to be fearless. And yet I can still try to convince myself that everything’s fine… only because I still have you.” His hands are trembling as he buries his face into their intertwined fingers. “And I just…I know I probably don’t say this enough, but you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, Tsukasa-chama. I’m just…I’m just so…”
Pulling away, Neo takes a breath and wipes the tears away, blinking the rest of it elsewhere. “S-Sorry, I… I got a little over-emotional there. It’s been a while since I was honest with myself too. And all because I was happy that…that we could talk. That you could listen. From the bottom of my heart, Tsukasa, thank you.”
The sudden wave of tears was more of a surprise than it probably should have been, and for a moment Tsukasa is torn between giving him some sort of comfort or letting the boy speak without distraction. In the end, she listens carefully. It’s the tear-stained refrain of a song and dance they’d sang before. The rhythms and words, it feels so familiar...
It’s a bittersweet melody, but Tsukasa doesn’t mind singing along when his verse is done. When Neo’s hands let go of hers to wipe at his tears, the only thing she can do is pull him into a careful embrace. Letting her chin rest on his shoulder. Ah, that’s dangerous. She could fall asleep like this.
“...Nee, you can be brave without being fearless, you know? No one expects you to be okay all of the time, especially after all we’ve had to go through... Tsukasa-chama’s bad dream would probably sound a little silly if she tried to describe it, but she really didn’t even want to be in the same room with anyone after what happened... She’s still nervous about going back to her room, even.”
Ah, well, there’s no need to go into the details. Tsukasa shakes her head to herself a bit, allowing her hold on Neo to tighten.
“It’s a little scary...how vivid it all was, right? It makes you wonder what these people are truly capable of... After that, I'm sure no one will be wanting to sleep for a long time. But...sharing the same feelings with everyone else, even on a small level...that’s not a bad thing, right? Right now, everyone understands what you’re going through, even if you didn’t dream about the same things... You’re not alone. That in itself is a scary thing, but it doesn’t have to be.”
Once the girl is finished speaking, Neo is slowly released from her embrace. Be free, little daredevil. Hopefully that would be enough as far as reassurance goes, but...
“...Ano, Tsukasa-chama was too afraid to face anyone this morning, but I’m actually really glad...! That you came and found Tsukasa-chama...and stayed, even if she was being difficult...”
Maybe not so much difficult as absolutely terrifying, but alright. Okay.
“Tsukasa-chama is still really uneasy about everything, but...talking like this, it helps. It’s thanks to Neo-kyun that Tsukasa-chama can keep doing her best~! Eheh, you really are my hero, you know?”