diminished @calciumtwig - Tumblr Blog

love

entry1

sometimes i will put on a song just because ive heard it before, not necessarily because i like it. I think it’s just to reacquaint my ears with the rhythms that my mind is presently reminded of. I did this today with a song. Don’t dream it’s over by crowded house. as i was listening, i was imagining scenarios in which i actually might say i like the song. Maybe on a boat, hearing it in a movie, sitting on the beach. Mostly times when it is hot outside. Then i began to imagine times when i’d really hate the song. One particular scene played out in my head. I am walking into a bar around noon and I just had the most horribly draining day. I sit down in a stool at the counter and all my muscles release. I don’t feel relaxed, just weak. I’ve ordered a drink that comes in a small plastic cup with ice and a tiny straw sticking out. I am gripping the plastic cup in one hand as my head rests in the other. The condensation is wetting the creases of my fingers and palm. Then the song comes on Don’t Dream It’s Over. This is my final straw. i am crying and with each sob my frame deflates more. The song is basically pointing and laughing at me. I want to pull out a .45 and nail each speaker in the place. But all i can do is melt into oblivion.

At least that’s not my reality. phew!