ranking the milgram characters by how they'd hold babies if their bouquets were actual babies
MAHIRU SHIINA — 10/10 MOTHER MATERIAL
Solid and overall perfect stance. If we ignore the slightly bunched back, she's perfectly holding both the lower part of the baby and the upper part by giving legs and back/head support, protecting them and having a solid hold on the kid in a way there's no chance the baby would fall unless she's really distracted. Congrats mappi
YUNO KASHIKI — 9/10 UM GUYS UM
Thank god this young lady has no kids! Overall Yuno's hold is very solid. She isn't giving full protection on the upper part of the body but by her hold the baby would be fully resting upon her own body in a way they'd only fall if they make some parkour to roll out of her grasp and fall into his back. Contrary to mappi she's not shielding the baby so they'll probably see amazing things like jackalope and the walls of milgram and the other prisoners.
SHIDOU KIRISAKI — 9/10 SOLID FIRST TIME DAD HOLD
This is the baby hold of a man who just saw their children being born and is now holding them for the first time. You can see he knows the basics like holding the legs and resting their body into your arms but there's way too little protection in their back when compared to yuno who can give the baby uppies so they don't fall. Shidous isn't as much of a "hold" as much as it is a "there's a baby resting in my arms" and that's okay!
MIKOTO KAYANO — 7/10 SILLY UNCLE
Not a parent hold as much as it is an uncle hold! They're not exactly holding the baby properly but they're probably keeping support to the kid by holding them by the legs and making them rest the upper body against his own which again quite dangerous but it's okay because this dude isn't the parent as much as he is those uncle's that would give insanely annoying toys as gifts for the children to annoy their parents
KAZUI MUKUHARA — 4/10 KID GRASP
he's literally just grasping the kid by their back as if they're a sack of oranges this is great. Either that or the kid is just hanging to him by grasping his shirt and fighting for it's life as he holds their back against him. Bad hold but not horrible I wouldn't trust him with a child but it's okay. Almost passable grade.
FUUTA KAJIYAMA — 2/10 POTATO SACK
This guy is holding this baby as if they're a potato sack. As if he'll just hit someone up with this baby. The baby is at least FULLY leaning into the shoulders as we can see so it means they won't immediately fall and someone can save them but the way he's grasping the baby's legs is worrisome. That's a potential trip to the hospital. Do not trust fuuta kajiyama with your babies he will turn them into gamers
MUU KUSUNOKI — 1/10 PEEKABOO
Why are you hiding the poor baby from its parents. this kid is probably keeling over to the front and will soon fall into his head but for now they're safe because they're at least leaning upwards. This is probably some workout because holding a baby like this would be painful as shit the shoulders would be sore. Bee/10
HARUKA SAKURAI — 0/10 HE HAD TO DO IT TO EM
We can excuse Haruka because if I was in his shoes I too would probably hold a kid by doing the i had to do it to em pose. Upside down. This kid will immediately fall into his head and get some good injuries the moment his hold on their legs slips and the baby falls. Haruka Sakurai can play with babies but both should be on the floor, do not let him pick them up.
KOTOKO YUZURIHA — -1/10 LIFTING
Like harukas but with one hand. Somehow more dangerous because as we can see this baby is actively attempting to walk away and is therefore not only more likely to slip because of that, but because Kotoko is holding them with one hand only. this baby will fall directly into their mouth and start crying for hours on end because kotoko couldn't even give the kid both of her hands to hold them.
