Is This Thing On?

Disabled geeky mom rambles

[candycatharsis-blog]

classic lit authors on ao3

Jane Austen: The slowburn writer to end all slowburn writers. Has a mild case of purple prose syndrome. Sets you up to think she's using a really lame trope or cliche, but then pulls the old BITCH U THOUGHT. Gets in fights with commenters who completely miss the point of her work.

William Shakespeare: Where dick jokes meet feels. Recycles old plots that have been in the fandom for years, but always manages to put a new spin on it. That said, he's better known for good character writing than good plots. Kind of problematic, but people love him anyway. Laughs at and encourages commenters who completely miss the point of his work.

The Brontë Sisters: Their fics get lots of comments but they never reply. They never leave author notes, either. They share an account, and there are talks of a collab fic coming soon. Write fics for OTPs of questionable healthiness and consent. Only ever write darkfic. Like, REALLY dark. ...People are getting kind of worried about them.

Edgar Allan Poe: Also only ever writes darkfic, but at this point, people have moved past being worried about him and have just accepted that he's weird, he's morbid, and we love him. Channels his feelings about his ex into his writing. It results in really good stories but everyone's sort of like, "...Dude."

Charles Dickens: Trying to set the record for highest wordcount on ao3, and it shows.

Victor Hugo: Currently holds the record for highest wordcount on ao3.

Oscar Wilde: Only ever writes M/M. Has a BAD case of purple prose, but it's worth it if you manage to get through. His stories are either hilarious or soul-crushing. Or somehow both. People love him but know better than to disagree with him publicly, lest he destroy you with one of his infamous subtweets.

L. Frank Baum: Wrote one really well-loved story that's among the most famous in the fandom, and it's literally all he's known for, and it pisses him off. His popular story became a multichap against his will because it's the only one of his stories anyone actually reads. He keeps trying to end it so he can work on other things, but always ends up coming back.

Arthur Conan Doyle: Feels L. Frank Baum's pain. SO much.

James Joyce: Has fascinating ideas, but takes forEVER to get to the point in his stories. Also a stoner, and it shows.

Lousia May Alcott: Writes stories for her unpopular OTP (that's a NOTP for most of the fandom) and breaks up everyone's favorite ships, mainly out of spite. Also kills everyone's favorite characters, less so out of spite.

Mary Shelley: Writes incredible stories, but publishes under her boyfriend's account because she's banned from ao3. ...Again.

victor hugo's is sO TRUE!

[candycatharsis-blog]

When they say ageing gracefully this is how I picture myself looking when I get older

[destinyrush]

too accurate 

[candycatharsis-blog]

Bonus points if the straight person doesn’t know your own sexuality

[candycatharsis-blog]

According to my son Tumblr doesn’t exist. So what the hell am I doing right now?

[kittypat-daily]

[candycatharsis-blog]

I buried mine alive

[jekabeth]

I wish I could...

Choose a new doctor by holding a contest where I would list some of my symptoms that lead to my already diagnosed condition and the first one to get it right would win.

No internet allowed. We would be in a room with no technology or books!

If they got the answer correct, I would then move on to phase two where they would take a written exam.

True or False:

1. You must be a certain age for certain symptoms to occur.

2. Doctors have collected all the knowledge they need to treat humans adequately.

3. Patients who have searched their symptoms online for years will not have enough expertise to correctly diagnose themselves.

4. Patients in their teenage years and early twenties are probably just going through a phase of stress and anxiety.

5. If a younger patient complains of a group of symptoms that are obviously one of several actual illnesses, I will spend however long it takes until we get some real answers.

Multiple Choice:

A 23 year old woman complains of dizziness and feeling sick in hot temperatures. Do you: 1. Run blood work and dismiss if all is normal. 2. Send for a specific test that deals with symptoms mentioned. 3. Tell them to exercise and eat healthy. 4. 1 and 3.

You have diagnosed a young patient with an illness that perfectly matches their symptoms and started a successful treatment plan. 6 months later, they return complaining of more symptoms. You: 1. Assure them you have correctly diagnosed them and up the dosage of current meds. 2. Tell them to give the medication time and that they should go to college. 3. Look into new symptoms even though 95% of other symptoms are already diagnosed. 4. 1 and 2

A new patient in their twenties complains of fatigue and joint pain. You do a physical examination to asses their joint mobility and are convinced they can bend their joints properly. You run several blood tests related to joint problems that all come back normal. You: 1. Question them in more detail about their symptoms and continue to work with them on finding an answer. 2. Prescribe yoga and an over the counter pain med. 3. Tell them there is nothing seriously wrong because of their age and test results. 4. 2 and 3

(I could do this all day).

[candycatharsis-blog]

I can relate, at the rate doctor visits are going I should get good treatment in my 60s.