cat eyed KP

I'm KP, and I make things. I am a theater artist, DIYer, photography enthusiast, and cat-eye bespeckled cat lady.

[cateyedkp]

She's up and running! I was able to get the tension balanced with some woven fabric, and then knit fabric with the help of my walking foot from my (much newer) other Kenmore. I'm encouraged! I primarily have been sewing knit clothing, and am hoping to put this machine to good use ☺️ I'm going to look into the clicking sound that has shown up, and work on my "sew while recording" skills 😂

[cateyedkp]

Here she is- my 1961 Kenmore Model 90 sewing machine in lavender, clocking in at a hefty 46 lbs! I think she’s dreamy :) I’ve been piecing together all of the accessories that would have come with this machine from Ebay, including the all-important manual. I now have the decorative stitch cams (without them, she can do a zig zag and a straight stitch only,) the automatic buttonholer, and the circular decorator (you can sew in a perfect circle, crazy!)

I found this ad in a Vintage Kenmore Yahoo Group (where I’m also hoping to get more information on how to use her) and just reading it makes me excited to learn all that she can do. In my quest to become more skilled at sewing clothes, it seems like this machine will be my ally.

I’m waiting on a vintage Kenmore Sew by Color kit that comes with a ton of accessory feet, and then she’ll be complete! Last night I cleaned and oiled her, but was stopped short at being able to sew. I think I messed up the threading around the tension discs. Hopefully I’ll get some advice in the Yahoo group. Mechanically, everything looks and sounds perfect, so at this point I’m certain it’s user error.

[cateyedkp]

She returns...

Hi! It’s been a really long time. I haven’t written in any real way or with any regularity in years. A big portion of that was due to a slew of life stuff- infertility, surgeries, pregnancy, baby, hand tumor...wait, what? Oh yes, hand tumor.

When Z was about 5 months old I noticed a tiny, painless, pea-sized lump in my left (thankfully not my dominant) hand. I had a fleeting, joking thought that it might be bone cancer, and then proceeded to ignore it for a couple of weeks. Until it started to hurt. A lot. And grow. Rapidly. It grew until it stretched from the base of my pinky finger almost to the bottom of my thumb pad in just 3 weeks. They had no idea what it was. At first they thought it was a relatively common giant cell tumor, but those are supposed to be painless. And it was an odd presentation. And my tumor was excruciatingly painful. I had surgery to remove it, and almost immediately my pain increased 1000-fold. It took weeks for the pathology to come back, and when it did, it wasn’t great news. 

I had myositis ossificans, which is essentially a pocket of bone forming in my muscle. It’s incredibly painful, it was enmeshed in my nerves, and it doesn’t usually happen in the hand. It’s commonly found after a deep muscle bruise, or repeated bruises, or after a surgery, and I never had an injury that I know of. So it just happened out of the blue, which made it more rare.

The additional bad news was that they removed it before it had a chance to fully calcify, so it was almost certain to re-grow. Which it did- starting a week after surgery. At least at that point they took my pain seriously. Only part of the tumor ended up turning into bone which you can see on this x-ray of tumor version 2 (my coworker called me “double pawed!”) The rest of it stayed a soft tissue mass that ran the length of my hand.

These tumors are aggressive and hard to treat. They are caused by injury to the tissue, and what is surgery if not a giant effing injury? So removing them can actually just start the process over and over. 

I had to wait 3 months to have it removed again, which I did in December. It was a 9 month ordeal, and with a wiggly, strong baby, you use your hands for everything. I also use my hands for my job all day on the computer, so it really impacted my life. Crafting was out of the question, which made Halloween in particular, our first with Z, very sad for me. (Which I am fully planning to make up for this year!)

All this to say, I’m 6 months out from surgery now, and things are much better so far. I have almost full use of my hand again, and though the tumor might come back again, for now at least, I’m back to sewing and crafting. It feels amazing. It’s like coming out of a long winter. I have dearly missed this.

I have begun (slowly) teaching myself to learn to sew clothing. For myself! This new body I’m rocking has made shopping for clothes a test to my new resolve to stop putting myself down over my weight. But sewing clothing drafted to my measurements has been an exercise in body positivity. To put something on that truly fits, and that you can alter to highlight and skim where you want it to feels amazing.

I’m also in the process of fixing up an old Kenmore Model 90 sewing machine from 1961 (it’s purple!!) So I hope to start posting some of my clothing adventures, as well as the work I’ll be doing to learn my new-old machine.

So, hi again. Glad to be back :)

[cateyedkp]

How to make a massive nail art sign in two easy steps. 1. Find wood in the garage of your new house. Brimming with optimism, stain it, beat it up, and buy more nails than you think is humanly possible. 2. Realize how much work this involves, and take over 2 years to finish it. Voila! Nail art!

[cateyedkp]

6 Months

This big girl is 6 months today. Yowza. It simultaneously feels like 6 years and 6 minutes all at the same time.

Life is crazy, but it’s good. There aren’t enough hours in the day (or, more accurately, not enough energy in the hours) to get all of the things done that I’d like to get done, but I’m trying to remind myself that if we’re all fed and alive, we’re more or less doing ok :)

Z is so much fun right now. I know a lot of people love babies, and I worked damned hard to have one, but I would never have called myself a “baby person.” So I really didn’t understand how hilarious they are.

She smiles all. the. time. And with her whole damn face. She’s a big, jolly baby. She’s also a little daredevil- anything that makes her stomach flip makes her squeal. Light pushing in the swing- meh, take it or leave it. Strong pushing in the swing (that she isn’t really old enough to be in anyway) and she squeals with glee. She loves being tossed in the air and flipped upside down by dad.

She loves to Facetime with people on the phone- so she’s the selfie queen. Seeing herself on screen causes a huge smile. Which in turn makes me crack up every time.

She’s developing a major friendship with Lilly. Lilly will seek her out and head butt her. Z will grab her fur but Lilly doesn’t seem to mind. I love that they have a connection.

She’s a jumping fiend in her bouncer, and is very close to crawling (we aren’t going to rush that stage!) She can already move herself around in a circle.

We just started trying food in the last week or so. So far, sweet potatoes are a big hit. Avocado and peas, not so much (that face was for avocado.)

Last weekend was the first weekend where we’ve all been healthy pretty much in the last 3 months (seriously, I’ve been sick continuously since putting Z in daycare.) It was a little slice of heaven. It was a gorgeous day out, and it was so nice to get out of the house and wander around. We went to the Holy Donut, Z’s first ever farmer’s market, and to the local nursery to grab some seedlings and compost. 

Happy half birthday, my peanut. Keep smiling <3

[cateyedkp]

Z and V, best buds for life :)

[cateyedkp]

Finally fitting in our one size diapers! Sprout Snap cover over a prefitted.

[hellfire-angels]

This is actual knitting instructions for the 4th Doctor Who’s Scarf. That is so awesome.

[cateyedkp]

Rainbow cloth diaper in action! (Pattern is the Arfy NB/SM Flip Cover)

[cateyedkp]

Oxytocin

Fair warning, this is likely to be a bit scattered and rambly. I want to record some of my feelings about my pregnancy, birth, and the first two weeks of our daughter being here- but I don’t really have this post organized in any coherent way.

I feel like I have spent all of 2015 holding my breath, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Since the nugget’s arrival, I feel like I can breathe for the first time in a long, long time. I spent almost all of active labor with my eyes shut- so when she finally was born and I opened my eyes and saw her, it was like waking up after a long, protective sleep. I can’t fully express how thankful I am that we’ve been so lucky to finally get to meet our daughter- something that many of my friends are still in limbo over (and I hope every day to be able to celebrate their good news soon.)

I didn’t talk about it very much, but pregnancy is hard no matter how badly you wanted and fought for it. There is also a hefty amount of survivor’s guilt when you’ve bonded with others who aren’t yet pregnant. I spent my first trimester with a subchorionic hemorrhage (bleed), and third trimester with gestational diabetes and borderline pregnancy-induced hypertension (preeclampsia.)

I feel incredibly fortunate for the care I received. Despite having several complications, the midwife practice I was with allowed me to go a week past my due date- something that would likely not have happened if I had stuck with my OB. I had really hoped to avoid induction, because I wanted the highest chance possible of avoiding another major surgery this year- excision surgery was intense enough. I was also hoping to avoid medications, as I have weird interactions with almost everything used for birth.

As my blood pressure climbed in that last week, I began to get daily migraines. So 6 days after my due date, I agreed to be induced. Thankfully, she was ready to come. All it took was one pill of Misoprostol, and within a few hours I was in active labor. 

I didn’t realize it at the time, but my birth went about as smoothly and quickly as it possibly could have gone. My total labor was 6 hours long, including just under an hour of pushing. Until reading stories from other people, I didn’t realize how short that was for a first time mom. I was able to avoid all pain medication and interventions beyond that one pill.

The birth tub was immensely helpful, as was Shawn and the amazing nurse we had that night. I had thought I’d want to lean on him a lot, physically, during labor- but weirdly enough I ended up being someone that any small stimulus made things much worse- even noises. We spent 5 of the 6 hours in almost complete darkness with nothing but very soft Dave Matthews playing in the background. He was right near me the whole time though- ready with water or chapstick or whatever I needed at the moment. I hope he knows how much he helped me, even if I didn’t look like I was accepting a lot of help at the time.

Since I spent most of my pregnancy blocking things out to some extent, I didn’t actually do much preparation or research for birth. My thought was to do my best and just roll with whatever happened as it unfolded. Oddly, in the moment, I defaulted back to my yoga breathing from high school, and some of the positive mental self-talk I use when I do long distance runs.

One of the biggest surprises of it all has been how much the nugget looks like my dad. It was already pretty surreal when they put her on my chest, but it was made even more surreal by seeing such a tangible reminder of his presence right in front of me. I so wish he could be here to meet her.

Since she has been here, I have laughed more than I’ve cried. I think we hit the jackpot of babies. She has a wonderful array of grumpy faces that we’ve been thoroughly enjoying. She has been eating like a champ and sleeps well for the most part (as well as 2 week old babies do.) We’re both tickled at her full head of hair. When she’s awake, she’s incredibly alert and focused- I am so looking forward to learning more about her personality.

My recovery has been very straight forward. Compared to recovery after my excision surgery in January, this has felt much, much easier. For that I’m really thankful. I left the house with the baby 6 days postpartum, and have been upright and able to cook and pick up and sew- all things I expected to not be doing so soon.

It’s been wonderful watching Shawn blossom as a dad. He’s enjoying her as much as I am, and it feels really great to see our family all together after 3 years of working towards this.

[cateyedkp]

This nugget arrived swiftly and healthily 7 days late on November 18. We are so incredibly fortunate. Our hearts are full <3

[cateyedkp]

Since this baby appears completely uninterested in making her appearance, I was able to finish 4 more Sprout Snap covers yesterday. Probably a good thing since I have yet to finish her stash and I'm 4 days overdue.

[cateyedkp]

Quick and Dirty Unsponge Dish Wand Tutorial I have been doing a ton of very quick, down and dirty sewing around here as we get down to the wire before my due date. I had recently heard about “unsponges” in a sewing group I’m in, and like unpaper towels, they sounded like a great idea. Our dish wand sponge has been in need of replacing for much longer than I’d care to admit publicly. So I thought it might be a good opportunity to do some super quick sewing and see if I could replace it with a washable counterpart. Tumblr isn't letting me post photos on mobile right now, so this will be list style. TUTORIAL First, remove the old yucky sponge from the plastic head- we’ll be reusing this part. Cut out your backing fabric and scrubby fabric (I used cotton woven and terry cloth.) Attach snaps with reinforcement fabric to your backer fabric. Use the wand head as a guide for where to place them. Sew right sides together leaving the bottom open for turning. Turn it right side out, stuff with absorbent fabric scraps or Nufoam, whatever you prefer. I used bamboo fleece because I had it on hand. Sew the bottom shut. Epoxy or E6000 your stud snaps to the plastic dish wand head- et voila! Reusable, washable, dish wand unsponge!

[cateyedkp]

Happy Samhain from Rockabilly Batman and Wonder Woman! And happy 5 year anniversary to my Dark Knight.  Looking forward to expanding our group shennanigans next year :)

[cateyedkp]

To my lovely friends who have experienced losses, privately or reluctantly in the spotlight, thinking of you today on Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. "When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn't a word to describe them. This month recognizes the loss so many parents experience across the United States and around the world. It is also meant to inform and provide resources for parents who have lost children due to miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, molar pregnancy, stillbirths, birth defects, SIDS, and other causes." -Ronald Reagan, establishing October as PAIL Awareness Month in 1988.

[cateyedkp]

September

Life has been incredibly full this summer and early fall, so I am aptly getting around to posting about September festivities...in October!  To my lovely friends slogging through the infertility battle, feel free to take a pass on this post- I’ll be talking about some baby stuff.

We celebrated Shawn’s birthday early in the month by going to see Eddie Izzard in New Hampshire. Eddie has a special place in our history, as he was our “d’ya want to get a cuppa coffee?!” on our first date. We watched Dressed to Kill as the cap to our first night as a couple- and have basically been inseparable ever since. I took the opportunity to take a couple of photos before we left, as the times I have actually done my hair/put an outfit together this past 8 months can be counted on one hand. We aren’t really interested in “maternity photos,” so these make a good stand-in.

We also made it to King Richard’s Faire in Massachusetts (how on earth have we NOT been to a Ren Faire before this!?!)  It’s definitely something we’ll do again...when I am less in the state I am now.  The car ride was tough, but the jousting and costumes were very cool.

The outpouring that Shawn and I have received in preparation for (hopefully- still don’t trust it enough to feel like it can’t be jinxed) our daughter’s arrival has been absolutely o-v-e-r-w-h-e-l-m-i-n-g. Above and beyond in so many ways. To be honest, I was speechless after our baby shower. I couldn’t believe everyone’s generosity. We are blessed about a million times over, and I can’t fully express how thankful I am.  

My sister was (and is!) an absolute phenom, and pulled this all together from 500+ miles away. She flew in with a suitcase full of clothing for Briefcase which “didn’t count” as her “real present.”  My mom fought through a staph infection to make it here. Family drove down/up from 3-5 hours away, I never expected that, but man, was it nice to see everyone. Considering how antisocial we’ve been for the last 2 years, it felt surprising, wonderful, and humbling that we haven’t burned bridges irreparably.

After all the partying earlier in the month, I was not expecting a big to-do for my 30th birthday. To my surprise, Shawn and my friends snuck around for months and planned a Harry Potter themed 30th party- complete with floating candles, House regalia, and an actual game of Quidditch!

I came home after a (ruse!) thrifting trip to help Jane find a table, to see Shawn in the driveway finishing up the last of the Quidditch hoops.

Again, the time, effort, and love was amazing. I am an incredibly lucky 30-year old.  And that, friends, was a very, very full September!

[cateyedkp]

Baby shower was this weekend- which deserves a full write up (I'm absolutely overwhelmed by everyone's generosity-borderline speechless.) We were gifted a veritable mountain of prefolds- so I got to try something I was really interested in making- pre-fitteds! Here's my first attempt- hopefully it'll work!