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JBB: An Artblog!
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Xuebing Du
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
JVL
I'd rather be in outer space šø
ā
@theartofmadeline
Not today Justin
will byers stan first human second
Cosmic Funnies
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ā£ Chile in a Photography ā£
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Jules of Nature
Discoholic šŖ©
Claire Keane
Today's Document
seen from France
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@chaetae-blog
you know itās never a good sign when you find a document on identification by a professional where the subtitle is āgag me with a spoonā
i love entomology related articles tbh, i feel like a good number of them have funny jokes or poke fun at themselves in the headers. My personal favorite was the namib dune spider article i read:
accompanied by this picture:
B E Ā F R E E
Omg I didnāt see this reply till now. 100% gold content.
They see me rolling, they hating
daily beetle facts: ground beetles are cannibals. if you lean in really close you can hear them whispering āhello clariceā
They arenāt so much a nightmare as they are a dissheveled and kind of sleepy-looking insectoid college student, down to the oversized and kind of dingy Mothra shirt and messy bun. They are VERY LARGE, and their tail wraps around the corner. The short one doesnāt seem so pleased to see them, and they shrug it off. Eh, whatever, heās probably scared of bugs or something. The big one doesnāt seem half as bothered, though, and theyāre almost shocked over the fact that he seems to have three arms, but, well, theyāve seen worse, and a New Friend is never a bad thing. They smile at him, and look back over his shoulder, smiling at the small one also, but, yāknow, no hands.
āHey, ah, sorry if I startled you guys while I was walking over. I donāt exactly sound like anything normal anymore, after all.ā They chuckle, antennae bobbling. āAnyways, couldnāt help but overhear, but are you guys lost? I mean, Iām not sure how you got in, the doorās closed, and itās an awfully big door.ā
Brenton squints with his one visible eye at Shiāsā¦ lower half, seeming to be in a mixed state of confusion, distress, and mild revulsion. Admittedly, itās not too surprising coming from someone who both smells like a candle obsessed old lady and looks like one hell of a dandy. Theyāre probably grossed out by the sheer concept of insects. Either way, he makes no motion to get from behind his largerĀ āfriendā.
āAaah! You have buggy parts too!ā Clarence practically blurts out, taking his hands back out of the handshake in order to run his fingers through his mop of curly hair.Ā āLost? Well, we sortaā¦ just showed up here?? We donāt know where we are at all!āĀ
The petite one butts in, seeming a little bitter in tone, and having one hell of a dated, slightly cornish accent,Ā ā āE does this all the time, yāknow?Ā āE saysĀ āeāsĀ āeaded one place but thenĀ āe takes me some fucked up place. I donā even know if this is the same dimension as the one weāre from.ā He sighs, exasperated.Ā āYaā wouldnā mind tellinā us where we are, would ya, you piece of work, you?ā
They give Squilliam Fancyson over here quite the same look. If he wants to come into their house, break their (admittedly quite shitty) pottery, and then look at them like theyāre some sort of gross bug and nothing else, he is absolutely getting the stink eye. All eight of them. With a loud TKTKTKTKTKKT noise, they scutter the rest of their huge ass into the hallway, wrapping themself up like a massive, armor-plated snake. They make it a point to yawn exaggeratedly, mouth splitting all the way down their neck, huge, sharp jaws very clearly twitching in their throat. Wanna get gross, bub? Theyāll show ya gross. They mumble an only half-seriousĀ āoh, excuse meā after their face returns to normal. They turn back to the Large One, a friendly smile on their face.
āYes! Of course, I wasnāt always this way, but things change, as they often do, you know.ā They tilt their head, about to say something, when the purple one interrupts. They pause, looking over at him. The stink eye has returned. They also have a bit of a British accent, but itās faded, as the majority of their time has not been spent back in England.Ā
āPiece of work, huh?ā They click their tongue.Ā āAt least I donāt look and sound like an extra in a cheesy period piece,Ā āeh, guvnaā?ā They turn their head back.Ā āAh, sorry, excuse my rudeness. I donāt particularly enjoy being looked down upon in my own house.ā They briefly glare over at Yankee Candle before continuing.Ā āLike I said, Iām not sure how, but youāve landed in whatās pretty much my house. Our house, really, I live here with my boyfriend.ā They frown, scratching their head with an antenna.Ā āSpacetime issues, huh...? Well, color me curious. I mean, thereās not much that I know about that, to be honest...Iām just a simple bug doctor, after all, not any sort of quantum physicist, really--ā They pause, antennae wiggling.Ā āOh! I nearly forgot to introduce myself. The nameās Shilog, but do call me Shi. How about you, whatās yours?ā
Huh. Two people, maybe? Weird. Howād they even get in? Shi walks down the hallway, a box of pins still in their hand. Their legs make a lot of tick-tick-tick noises on the tile, sounding like someone drumming their fingers, if that person had about forty fingers and very long nails.Ā
ā¦Why the hell does the entire hall smell like a Yankee Candle shop all of the sudden?Ā
They reach the turn in the hallway, slowly peeking around the corner at the, uhā¦kids? They want to say kids, but, well, one of them mustāve had a hell of a growth spurt somewhere along the line. Now it REALLY smells like a particularly perfumed corner of a Bed Bath and Beyond. Their antennae wiggle, sort of confusedly. Theyāre at a bit of a loss.
āUhā¦hi?ā
Brenton freezes, snapping his head towards the approaching sounds, feeling oddly threatened by whatever it is. The thing approaching honestly sounds like some sort of nightmare, and he makes quick work to move behind Clarence; who of course, doesnāt even notice the noise.
āWhy should I shh? I thought we were gonna ask someone where we areāā
āShhhh, Clarence! Jesus christā Whaā did I just fuckinā say?ā
As Shilog approaches, the two freeze in place, but for seemingly entirely different reasons. Brenton looks positively appalled, where as Clarence seems to be absolutely brimming with joy and/or excitement. Soon enough, much to Brenās regret, the tall one bolts over to Shi, almost immediately removing the box from their hands with one hand, while shaking both their hands with the other two. It was three arms, right?
āHello! Hi there!!ā
They arenāt so much a nightmare as they are a dissheveled and kind of sleepy-looking insectoid college student, down to the oversized and kind of dingy Mothra shirt and messy bun. They are VERY LARGE, and their tail wraps around the corner. The short one doesnāt seem so pleased to see them, and they shrug it off. Eh, whatever, heās probably scared of bugs or something. The big one doesnāt seem half as bothered, though, and theyāre almost shocked over the fact that he seems to have three arms, but, well, theyāve seen worse, and a New Friend is never a bad thing. They smile at him, and look back over his shoulder, smiling at the small one also, but, yāknow, no hands.
āHey, ah, sorry if I startled you guys while I was walking over. I donāt exactly sound like anything normal anymore, after all.ā They chuckle, antennae bobbling. āAnyways, couldnāt help but overhear, but are you guys lost? I mean, Iām not sure how you got in, the doorās closed, and itās an awfully big door.ā
They were in the middle of pinning some of their extensive backlog of dead bugs, when they hear a loud noise from outside. Huh? Shep might have knocked something with his tail. Hmā¦there was a yell, too, but that doesnāt sound like Shep. They put down the big blue weevil they were working on, and skitter out into the hallway. They are in their pajamas and they look an absolute mess.
āā¦Helloooooā¦?ā
This happened very rarely, these days. Clarence used to be prone to randomly teleporting, but he was pretty good at going back to where he was as soon as he got somewhere weird. Sometimes it led to uncomfortable situations. These days, though, heās had it under wraps. Today, though. He didnāt know where he was, not even in the slightest, and of course, this time, he brought someone with him.
āGod damā it, Clarence! Look what yaā did! Yaā broke the god damā thinā! Where even are we?ā
āI donāt know! Maybe we could ask someoneāā
āShh shhā¦ someoneās comināā¦ā
Huh. Two people, maybe? Weird. Howād they even get in? Shi walks down the hallway, a box of pins still in their hand. Their legs make a lot of tick-tick-tick noises on the tile, sounding like someone drumming their fingers, if that person had about forty fingers and very long nails.Ā
...Why the hell does the entire hall smell like a Yankee Candle shop all of the sudden?Ā
They reach the turn in the hallway, slowly peeking around the corner at the, uh...kids? They want to say kids, but, well, one of them mustāve had a hell of a growth spurt somewhere along the line. Now it REALLY smells like a particularly perfumed corner of a Bed Bath and Beyond. Their antennae wiggle, sort of confusedly. Theyāre at a bit of a loss.
āUh...hi?ā
saw a meet the mun thing and figured id do it for shits n gigs
Name:Ā roch Birthday: july 19th Ethnicity: so white im literally transparent Gender: blood Preferred pronouns: they/them + xey/xem/xeir Sexual orientation: [LOUD CHANTING] BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD!!! Occupation: i call health insurance companies for $$mad cash$$ Hidden talent:Ā i can quote sbahj down to the typo Relationship status:Ā No Eye Color(s): bluegreen-Ish Hair Color(s):Ā grumpily living with blonde ass hair and i Hate Height: smol Weight:Ā [squints eyes] Scars:Ā one on ankle from when i so foolishly dropped a pyrex cup, one on finger from when mirror fell on me, myriad on extremities from FUCKING MOSQUITO BITES Mental illnesses: [distant price is right loser horn] Physical illnesses: none Hogwarts house:Ā hangin w/ my slytherinssssssssssĀ
Bee swarms
chaetae
Out of nowhere, a horrible, noisy clatter echoes through the halls. Something, appears to have knocked over something else. Following the sound of shattering, it may have been a vase or pot that crashed to the ground. A faint yell also is made, marking something alive causing the noise.
They were in the middle of pinning some of their extensive backlog of dead bugs, when they hear a loud noise from outside. Huh? Shep might have knocked something with his tail. Hm...there was a yell, too, but that doesnāt sound like Shep. They put down the big blue weevil they were working on, and skitter out into the hallway. They are in their pajamas and they look an absolute mess.
ā...Hellooooo...?ā
So how would you feel if you were given the power to speak to animals but it turned out every single animal in the world just had the voice and personality of Peter Griffin from Family Guy
Oh god I donāt CARE about the one celebrity with the ill-fitting shorts and whatever else stop yelling at me to ask people stuff.
Good evening everyone! Sorry Iāve been a bit quiet recently. How is everyone doing tonight? O:
Ridiculously Photogenic Leopard Gecko (photo by kirs20)
Send me HC + a word and Iāll write a headcanon about it regarding my character.
Beeeeyot
you cant fuck the gilbert gottfried beetle. best not to fuck anything voiced by gilbert gottfired actually, as a general rule of thumb. likewise, you arent to be seen trying to fuck any of the backup dancer beetles, or the numerous incidental beetles in attendance at the berkley beetleās ball. they will only bodyshame your pathetic lack of an exoskeleton and various other beetle parts, in a vaguely hypocritical public humiliation, being freakish little donbluthian alien men themselved. wise up bucko. it just aint worth it.
