A Chronically Online Girl’s Thoughts

my lil world (emphasis on MY)

[chaosbabeclub]

Hi hi!

So, I’ve always been that chronically online girl — like, to an unhealthy degree. I know way too much about things I probably shouldn't, from internet drama involving people I don't even follow to strangely specific niche topics that no one in my real life would ever care about (or even understand, honestly). That’s kind of how this blog was born. I needed a little corner of the internet where I could spill my thoughts, my rants, my questionable takes, and my random obsessions without scaring away my friends.

This blog is basically my brain in blog form: chaotic, overthinking, very emotionally attached to fictional characters, sometimes annoying (but in a fun way, I hope). I have a deep love-hate relationship with so many things! Pop culture, aesthetics, internet people, the concept of girlhood, you name it, and I just wanted a space to unpack all of that without filtering myself too much.

I don’t take myself too seriously, so don’t expect polished essays or well-researched deep dives. It’s more like: here’s what I’m obsessed with today, here’s something that made me irrationally mad, and here’s a half-baked theory about a show I can’t stop watching. If that sounds like your kind of chaos, I’d love to have you stick around. Talk to me and make friends with me — I promise I’m nice (mostly) hehe.

[chaosbabeclub]

I used to be really excited to keep up with news about them, but the more I learned about what was happening behind the scenes, the more my perspective changed. Personally, I don't think Mateen has been as serious about his responsibilities as he was before he got married, and that definitely lowered my opinion of him

either he gained personality or he lost it😐

“Either he gained personality or he lost it” is taking me OUT 🤣 That’s honestly the funniest way I’ve seen someone describe it.

I get what you mean, though. It’s like the mystery wore off? Before, he had that whole “golden prince” aura, but now that people have seen more of him, the image doesn’t hit the same. Whether he actually changed or we’re just seeing him more clearly now.. hat’s the million-dollar question 🤪

[chaosbabeclub]

I’m so curious about how the Bruneian public perceives the RF. Sometimes I feel that it’s quite a mixed bag. Bruneians are very vocal about the RF on Reddit as well, but is still hard to tell you know?🤔

I think it’s definitely a mix of diff opinions. Most Bruneians I see still respect the RF publicly, but there’s also a growing number who are becoming more critical, especially online where people feel safer expressing their opinions. Reddit, in particular, tends to attract that more outspoken crowd, so it can make the criticism seem more widespread than it actually is. At the same time, I also don’t think the overwhelming praise you see on other platforms reflects the full picture either. The truth is probably somewhere in between, and because of Brunei’s environment, it’s hard to know what people genuinely think versus what they’re comfortable saying publicly.

[chaosbabeclub]

Being a silent watcher and reader here and there forever, but I need to get this off my chest. I genuinely feel bad for Anisha. It feels like she's dedicated almost half her life to Datin Mariam's family or maybe gonna be forever. Sure, they probably were matched from the beginning. But why does it feel like she can't even enjoy motherhood in peace? She shouldn't have to force herself back into jeans or rush to lose the weight. Looking at how quickly she seemed to return to a polished image after giving birth, I couldn't help but feel for her. I hope she's taking care of herself just as much as she's taking care of everyone else's expectations. It screams insecurity to me. Personally, I've always felt Prince Mateen makes her second-guess herself instead of making her feel secure

Never defending her at all cost

Instead of helping her feel comfortable, Prince Mateen becomes even more drawn to his private whole "grey" world😕

Feels like Anisha has to compete with another woman or fit into a world that's never really Anisha’s, but hers…

It really can be seen…

The concerns everyone seemed to have before they got married…

That’s far too soon😕

I’ve honestly had similar thoughts for a while. Not because I think we know what their relationship is like behind closed doors, but because of how everything has looked from the outside. Before they got married, people kept saying Anisha would have to adapt to Mateen’s world, and sometimes it really does feel like that’s what happened.

The postpartum comments made me feel especially bad for her. A few months after giving birth and people were already expecting her to look exactly the way she did before pregnancy. Instead of letting her just enjoy being a new mom, it felt like everyone immediately shifted the conversation back to her appearance.

I also can’t help but notice how much she’s changed over the past year, not necessarily in a bad way, but she seems different from the Anisha we used to see before the wedding. Maybe that’s just what comes with marrying into the royal family, maybe it’s just growing into a new role, or maybe we’re all reading too much into it.

At the same time, I recognize that she’s now part of the royal family and, like the rest of them, she’s part of a system that many people feel has done little to move Brunei forward or improve the lives of ordinary Bruneians. So I understand why people criticize the institution. But even with that in mind, I don’t know if her relationship within the royal family (especially with the Sultan) is actually as ideal as people imagine. From the outside, it sometimes feels like she’s expected to carry so much while also receiving so much criticism, and I honestly find myself wondering if all of that is really worth it ?

[chaosbabeclub]

I once judged Princess Sarah hard for using a tassel ring when she was experimenting with modern hijab styles. At the time I thought, at least Anisha knows how to wear a proper hijab without showing skin at official events. Today Anisha completely proved me wrong😂 Whatever she wore today managed to be worse than Princess Sarah’s old look. I’m pretty sure her hijab stylist is actively sabotaging her

HAHAHA 😭 What surprised me is that this isn’t how Anisha used to style her baju kurung (ever since she married into the RF at least). If you look back at her older looks, especially after the wedding, everything was much more covered. Lately though, I feel like ever since Mateen became Foreign Minister, she’s been a lot bolder with the neckline and hijab styling. Showing a bit of skin around the neck wasn’t really something you saw from her before, which is why these recent looks stood out to me. I don’t know if it’s a new stylist or just a change in her own preferences, but it’s definitely a noticeable shift if you’ve followed her style over the years.

[chaosbabeclub]

It is perfectly normal not to call Anisha a Princess. Looking at customary law and hierarchy, she has never received the royal sash or badge the Sultan presents every birthday. Even Prince Sufri’s wife, an 80s Malaysian actress and a commoner, received a title and a royal sash. Anisha is the only one who has never worn them, despite the media branding her as Pengiran Anak Isteri. Her PAI title has never even been officially published like those of other commoners who married into the royal family.

Honestly, this is one of the things that’s always made me raise an eyebrow! I never questioned people calling Anisha “Princess” because that’s how the media and fan pages introduced her from day one. But when we actually look at how previous royal marriages were handled, her case DOES seem different.

Prince Sufri’s wife was a commoner too, yet everything surrounding her title and royal insignia was much clearer. With Anisha, people keep pointing out that she hasn’t been seen wearing the royal sash or the birthday insignia from HM, and I can understand why those details stand out to people who closely follow Brunei’s royal customs. The way her PAI title has been reported also feels different compared to past announcements.

Of course, none of us knows what goes on behind palace doors, but I don’t think people are questioning it for no reason. These discussions didn’t just appear overnight LOL, people have been noticing these little differences since the wedding. Whether they actually mean anything is another story, but I get why royal watchers keep bringing them up

[chaosbabeclub]

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳 #latepost but thank yall for all the love (and hate LOL) this has been a fun year!

[chaosbabeclub]

people indeed starting to get used to the fact that Prince Mateen's public presence is slowly fading tho he's a minister now

Yeah, I agree

I feel like people are slowly getting used to not seeing him as much anymore. Plus, now that he’s a minister, I don’t think we’ll be seeing the same level of public appearances that made everyone obsessed with him in the first place. The hype just isn’t the same anymore.

[chaosbabeclub]

my 2 cents, I don't buy it when people say Mateen plays polo so well. His handicap is literally 0. Anyway because he skipped Ayala polo this time, the whole tournament feels so dead. Brunei team didn't even pass the semi-final for the first leg. We just love to overhype everything about him and his family in the truth be told

I agree to an extent!! 😅 I think people sometimes overstate his polo ability because they’re fans of him, not necessarily because they follow polo. A 0 handicap is respectable, but it’s not considered elite in the polo world (LOL afaik!).

That said, I also don’t think it’s fair to say he can’t play. He’s clearly experienced (hence the Sotogrande annual trip) and has played for years. But I also don’t think representing Brunei internationally is, by itself, proof that he’s among the best. I mean… he’s literally a prince. 😭 He has opportunities that very few people ever would, and of course his family is in a position to support and allow him to represent the country. That’s a privilege that can’t really be separated from the discussion.

I think tournaments feeling “dead” without him says more about his celebrity status than his handicap. He’s undeniably the biggest draw, but popularity and sporting ability aren’t always the same thing.

[chaosbabeclub]

I lovee reading about the royal dramas and teas. Please don't stop posting about it!! I'm here all the wayy and I'll bring cookies to the table. Promisee!!🍪🫖☕

AWWW 😭 this is literally the sweetest thing to come back to after disappearing for a month (or more haha) thank you so much!! Knowing someone’s actually waiting for my little royal tea rambles makes me want to get back into posting again. Pull up a chair, keep the cookies coming, and I’ll do my best to serve the tea soon LOL 🫖💛

[chaosbabeclub]

I absolutely cannot stand opinions about how people look down on the Sultan’s look. Mocking him like he’s literally the villain here. Prince Mateen's fans on Royal Confession are all completely biased. You can't bear him being criticised, yet you look down on his father's looks? I’m convinced Prince Mateen would be much more hurt reading their rubbish opinions about the Sultan than about himself or their favourite Princess

I mean Mateen wouldn’t have looked that way if it weren’t for both his mom and dad’s genes so I think fans of him shouldn’t be criticizing looks 🤷🏻‍♀️ but yeah he may not be the best nation leader lol but Mateen wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for him

[chaosbabeclub]

Where are you? I really miss your royal drama and teaaa 🤣

Hello! LOL this senior year of uni has been sucking all the life out of me!!! HAHAHAH I simply don’t have the time and energy to scroll around here anymore (so sad!) but I’ll try to be more present every once in a while :)

[chaosbabeclub]

Omg! Have you guys seen the news about PAIPRA’s title being taken away? WHATS THE TEA

[chaosbabeclub]

Hiii! 😭 I’ve been so, so, SO busy with senior year that I completely disappeared for a while. I genuinely can’t stress enough how hectic everything’s been. 😵‍💫 Anyway… what’s up? How’s everyone doing?

[chaosbabeclub]

People are assuming that pai sarah is pregnant, i read many comments about it actually under her pictures in fan pages and Facebook, and her official account latest post many comments then it was deleted, omg do u think? 🫢🫢

Maybe!! But I can’t tell yet with her photos, but whatever it may be I hope she’s always healthy 💚

[chaosbabeclub]

I genuinely believe in the evil eye. As someone who’s been following Mateen since Covid era, I found some his relatives account. Miss Noor Cahaya. Cahaya’s second baby was absolutely adorable, just the most precious, chubby little thing, and she used to post her all day. Then, boom! first month of the Brunei lockdown, Mateen’s entourage back there, the baby was instantly hospitalised with Covid. She completely pulled back after that. Yeah evil eye is realllll

Honestly, I’m usually pretty skeptical about these things, but stories like that always make me pause for a second 😭 Of course, the baby getting COVID could have been a complete coincidence, but I can also understand why she became much more private afterward. Whether it’s the evil eye or not, there’s a reason so many parents become protective about how much they share of their children online :)

[chaosbabeclub]

I still don’t understand the mindset that labels people who comment on the appearance, walk, or even how royals carry themselves as misogynists, while at the same time completely ignoring those royals' political stances and policies. Bro? Even Adam and Eve sinned. How on earth can you assume these royals never make mistakes or cause problems?

I think two things can be true at once. We should ABSOLUTELY be mindful of misogyny and the way women in public life are often scrutinized more harshly than men. But that doesn’t mean every single critique of a female royal is automatically rooted in sexism.

For me, the key question is what is being criticized and why. If someone’s reducing a woman entirely to her appearance or holding her to standards that men are never held to, then that’s fair to call out. But if people are discussing how a royal presents herself in a public role, carries out engagements, or manages her public image, that’s part of being a public figure.

I actually think it’s counterproductive to label all criticism as misogyny because it shuts down any meaningful discussion. We can recognize the existence of sexist double standards while also acknowledging that royals are not beyond critique. Those two ideas aren’t mutually exclusive, and pretending they are only weakens the needed conversation.