(づ-̩̩̩-̩̩̩_-̩̩̩-̩̩̩)づ

never go out of style.

[charavibes]

caralikesdix2:

Cara thought over his quip for a moment, not sure if there was a sarcastic  undertone.. she decided not to focus on that. “I dunno, New York didn’t have Moe’s Pizza.” she smiled, bumping into him with her shoulder a bit. She didn’t want to bring up highschool again but Moe’s was one of the spots they frequented and it made her smile to think of them back there together again. “You in the mood for a slice?”

“Sure, yeah.” Charles wasn’t sure what exactly he expected when he had asked Cara to go to dinner with him. ( He refused to use the word date, even if it was only in his head. ) This whole walk down memory lane was everything Charles had tried desperately to steer clear of the moment after their graduation ended. Being around her was a continuous slap to the face of everything he could have been, but failed to be. “So, what do you do now?” he decided to ask to fill in the silence. “Like, you just throw a bunch of galleries a year and that’s it?” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

“Well, shes gorgeous, gonna be breaking all the boys’ hearts surely.” Cara spoke, proud of the little girl she had known for so long. But, despite how well Cara thought this was going she sensed something in the air.. a thin layer of tension that she was not quite a fan of. “So, where are we going for dinner?” she finally interjected, thinking maybe it wasn’t best to dwell on the past, no matter how badly she wanted to gloat.

[charavibes]

Charles could only hum in response. He wasn’t too keen on talking about high school, regardless of if it was from his point of view or his sister’s, now that it had become painfully obvious to him that he was the cliché quarterback who peaked when he was eighteen years old. “Wherever you wanna go,” Charles decided. The left end of his mouth slipped up into the smallest, borderline sarcastic smile when he added, “Though I’m sure nothing here lives up to New York dining.” 

[charavibes]

caralikesdix2:

Cara kicked her feet as she walked, pretending to pout a bit. “Damn it, I had really wanted her to get fat.” she mumbled, looking over and up-because yes, he was that much taller- at him with a sly little smile before she was nudging him with her shoulder. “So, hows your mom? The girls? I hope they are all well. Littlest one should be almost in highschool now, right?” she questioned, unsure if she was on the right track but she figured she was close.

“They’re good.” Charles wasn’t sure how he had imagined this to go, but all these reminiscent conversation starters weren’t it. Part of him honestly wanted to pretend that they hadn’t known each other at all. That she had just been a face in the crowd at their high school, or someone who’s name he heard ring through his ears a couple times but had never been able to put a face to. Talking hadn’t ever been this hard to do with Cara, and it was near pitiful that it was now. “And yeah, this is Rebecca’s first year in high school,” he agreed. But also the only thing that justified Charles staying at home. His parents were always busy with work, and he worried that Rebecca would end up making half the bad decisions he’d made in high school because there was no one monitoring her. “It’s .. terrifying.”

[caralikesdix2-blog]

“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” Cara smiled, wiggling a bit as they walked. “Kinda nice to stick it to all the people who said I couldn’t yah know? Like Mrs. Gallagher the art teacher. She said my pieces were too all over the place, that i Needed to choose one genre, but did you know, just last month, Art & Culture wrote a piece on me saying I was the most diverse artist to come out of upstate in years? Suck that Mrs. Gallagher.” The tiny brunette grinned, gloating a little too much, even for her. It wasn’t, necessarily, that she had a big head, she just enjoyed knowing she had done something worth while while people who doubted her were struggling. “But enough about me, I could go on for days.  Tell me about what the prom king? Oh, do you still see Katherine? Please, tell me she got fat.”

[charavibes]

He hummed thoughtfully. Charles knew he should have been proud of her for that, but it would have been hypocritical. The past seven years he’d spent hoping that Cara would make her way back to Baltimore with a pile of paintings that hadn’t gotten her anywhere tucked between her hands. He was that selfish, to have wished he wasn’t the only massive failure to have come from their graduating class. “She left too, I think, but she comes around for holidays and what not sometimes. Y’know, pass her by in the mall and all that,” Charles decided to downplay. They might have hooked up once or twice during those breaks Katherine decided to make her way back to Baltimore, but they weren’t ever serious. They hadn’t ever been, even when they were seventeen and Charles was practically glued to her hip when he wasn’t out throwing a football. “Not too many people stuck around. They’re all off living in, like, Kansas or some other nowhere town.” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

Cara nodded, pretending her parents didn’t keep her up to date with all the gossip of their small town. She had known that college didn’t work for Charles and she would have been lying if she said at the time it hadn’t made her a little happy. It was part of her motivation.. to know after all he had said to her about art school, it was he who had failed… now though.. it only made her sad. She had been petty about it in her younger years and now she just felt bad.. Cara truly did want to see Charles succeed at whatever it was that would make him happy at this point in his life. “So,” she began, not wanting to dwell on his failed college experience, “What do you do now?”

[charavibes]

“What every other twenty seven year old is getting up to,” Charles halfheartedly answered, shrugging his left shoulder after. Frankly, he wasn’t doing anything. He had some menial job at the public library and went on dates with girls he met through friend’s friends. There was nothing substantial going on in his life right now, and it was a massive letdown to both himself and — although never outright spoken — his family. Charles had everything lined up for him to make something of his life after high school, and he ruined it all before it could even begin. “You’re the one who’s made it big time.” Charles did his best to keep the bitterness from his tone. 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

“I actually like to come back home and paint, so I rented this little studio downtown and I paint here since my parents sold the house. I stay in new york most of the year though, for social events and work, lucky for you, I felt like painting this weekend.” she grinned as they walked along the dimly lit street of their hometown, the business district being oddly quiet for a saturday night. “And you? How’d you end up back here? I thought you were off at Cal State or some shit playing ball?”

[charavibes]

He gave her a little smile back. Charles might’ve considered it his lucky day, running into her, but he certainly wasn’t going to give her an ego boost and admit it. The smile faltered at her question. “Some shit,” he echoed. Football hadn’t worked out for him as well as he had planned it to, and Charles got into a bit of a slump because of it. Being captain of the best football team in the Big Ten conference didn’t mean shit after high school. He had gotten a little too comfortable with the name chanting and constant stream of praise, Charles was in over his head when he stepped foot onto that USC football field. “—College just isn’t for me.” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

“Truthfully?” Cara asked, her eyes squinted a bit as she thought about telling the whole truth… a fraction of the truth would have to do for now. “We broke up yesterday.” she spoke, though it wasn’t far off. She had indeed talked to her fling yesterday and told him it wasn’t working and that she didn’t want to see him anymore.. even if it was just casual dating… part of her wondered if she had really done that because she was bored with him or because Charles walked back into her life… she had always carried a flame for the boy but she never thought he had felt the same.. maybe it would be different now.. she was different now. “So, I guess we are both pretty single now…”

[charavibes]

The break up was coincidental with this get together, yeah, but Charles didn’t think much of it. Truth be told, there was a small part of him that was happy with the image of Cara he had in his head now, too deep in her own art to be able to balance a withstanding relationship since he hadn’t grown the balls to outright say something to her before she fled. Charles had always been a little selfish enough to hope that she wouldn’t find anyone too interesting when she’d run off to what’s-it’s-face university. “That sucks,” he tried to offer in a way that would at least come off halfheartedly genuine. Quick to change the subject, he asked, “What brought you back here anyway?” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

“Yeah, yeah. Lets go.” She grinned, quickly grabbing her purse but the table by the door and stepping out into the night air with him. Being this close to him like this made her glow and she wondered if he could see that. “So, how’ve you been? Hows Allison doing?” she questioned, wanting to feel out just how serious his relationship with this girl was. Hopefully not too serious… she wasn’t cute enough for him… mainly though, it was jealousy.

[charavibes]

Charles shrugged. It was one day, and she hadn’t bothered to text him after it — which probably had something to do with him leaving her by herself for the fifteen minutes it took to ask Cara out on this date — and Charles wasn’t into the girl enough to reach out to her. “Don’t think we’ll be hanging out much,” he decided to answer a little honestly. Charles’ hands stuffed away in his pant pockets to refrain from reaching out for her again. “What about you? How’s— what did you say your boyfriend’s name was?” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

It had been five days since she had seen him… five days she was unable to rid her mind of his dimples, his stupid curly hair or the deep and playful gruff in his voice. It was like he was a stain on her skin and no matter how hard she scrubbed him away he remained. It was unfair really and it had given her this deep sense of dread; what if he didn’t like her? What if he had changed? What if she changed? What if this truly was just to catch up? God, Cara hated that even after years her heart still fluttered at the idea of maybe being something more with him. It was pathetic.

Cara had just changed for the fifth time when she heard a knock at her door, Charles unknowingly choosing this outfit for her. She gave herself a once over, fluffing her hair a bit before she was at the door and opening it slowly, not wanting to seem to eager about seeing him again. “Hey.” she spoke softly, trying her best to add a bit of boredom to her tone. 

[charavibes]

“Hey,” he echoed, allowing a small smile to curl the ends of his mouth up. It was a good thing his hands were folded behind him, because Charles’ first instinct was still to scoop her up into a hug. Although that probably would have granted him a punch in the face now because she had a boyfriend. Fuck. That shouldn’t have brought forth the wave of distaste that it did. He hadn’t spoken to her in years; it shouldn’t have been that surprising that she had found someone. 

Charles made sure to keep his gaze set solely on her. The last thing he wanted to do was peer behind her into her apartment and spot anything that would make it painfully obvious to him that he didn’t stand a chance to be with her. Again. “You ready to go?” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

It seemed as if none of his reactions were what she aimed for. She wanted a chuckle at how even after years had passed his name was still as dorky as ever but nothing. “Yeah, see yah..” she muttered half heartedly, unsure of what this dinner would even bring about. At the moment it felt like all it would do was drag up old feelings and leave them both feeling like shit.

[charavibes]

The anxious knot in his stomach was unusual. This wasn’t a date, there was no reason for Charles to be nervous about any of this. And it was Cara. They had been friends for years and she had bore witness to every aspect of him. She knew him well enough, too, and it should have helped that there hadn’t been any dramatic changes in his life since the last time they spoke. —But maybe that was why Charles was growing more antsy with every step he took. He was practically the same person he was graduation night, and Cara had gone off and made a name for herself, became some renowned artist with a boyfriend. She had done everything she wanted, and Charles was a poster boy for the hometown she’d fled. 

There was a solid minute that passed before he was able to rack up the courage to knock on her door, his hands immediately folding behind his back after. 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

Honestly, Cara had wanted to see Charles a little more tore up at the sound of her fake relationship status. Maybe this was just a day to catch up.. that certainly put a damper on her mood. “Seven. works perfectly.” she smiled, forcing herself to seem all authentically enthusiastic as possible. “Uh, is it still the same one you had in highschool?” she asked, pulling her phone from her clutch and scrolling down it til she hit the C’s. “Curly-Headed Fuck. Got it.”

[charavibes]

If she had his number the whole time, Charles had to wonder why the fuck she hadn’t thought to at least shoot him a message once in a while. At least let him know that she was still alive and well. It would have been a hell of a lot less painful for him to know that their sudden break of communication was because she’d had to change numbers one too many times and his got lost along the way. “Cool,” he muttered. “I’ll see you then.” Charles gave a flimsy little wave before wandering back towards the opposite end of the gallery. 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

That certainly wasn’t the answer she had been looking forward to.. in fact it took a hit at her ego and before she knew it she was trying to regain some ground. “Good thing then, my boyfriend wouldn’t like that much.” she lied, knowing full well that she was single. She had dated a professional hockey player on and off for about a year after meeting at a private showing but they had called it quits last month. Charles didn’t need to know that thought. “But he won’t mind some catching up. How about dinner on Wednesday? I’m free anytime after six.”

[charavibes]

His overall posture twitched a little at the admission, but Charles was able to stuff away his honest reaction. For the most part. Even if he’d come up with this mock relationship in his head already, there was a tiny part of him, in the far back of his mind, that wanted to think Cara wouldn’t actually have someone waiting for her back home. “Yeah, Wednesday’s alright. Text me your address, and I’ll swing by around seven,” Charles noted, already half-turned back in the direction he’d left Allison before his steps fumbled at a realization. “—But you don’t have my number anymore, huh?” 

[charavibes]

caralikesdix2: 

A small smile pulled at the corners of her lips as he rambled on in typical Charles fashion. He had always been a bit of an awkward boy which was honestly part of the reason she had always liked him so much. “This particular showing will the the next 3 weekends and after that we are moving it to New York City in hopes of getting more private sales.. why?” she questioned, though she was already sure as to where this was going. “Planning on asking me out on a date when you yourself are currently out on a date? Ballsy.”

Right. He was on a date. It wasn’t like it was going anywhere, though. It’d probably end at his apartment later tonight at most — if he was lucky. “Not a date,” he decided to correct anyway. They were friends, or at least he and Cara had been before she fucked off for college and made a big name for herself then never spoke to him again. Dating hadn’t ever been anything Charles had allowed himself to think of, and certainly couldn’t now. “I’m just .. I don’t know. I figured you’d wanna catch up, but if you’re too busy then I understand.” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

Cara had been in the middle of explaining piece 1 when she was pulled away, her brows furrowed together in confusion as she watched the floppy haired boy in front of her lead her off to god only knew where. “Charles.” she whispered, not wanting anyone to hear her. “Charles, what are you doing? Wheres your date?” Cara wouldn’t have admitted it out loud but she was glad he had seemingly abandoned his date to come and find her. No matter the time, Cara still had a flame for Charles, she wasn’t sure if that would ever go away. Odd were, however, that this torch she carried for him was useless. 

[charavibes]

“I don’t know. By the ... I don’t know,” Charles gave up, deciding not coming up with an answer would be better than giving some offhandedly offensive description of a painting that Cara would have — assumedly — worked weeks on. Frankly, now that he had her in front of him, Charles wasn’t sure why he’d even pulled Cara away. There was so much that he needed to say, and yet nothing seemed to want to come out. Not with all these people flitting around, ogling at the paintings hung on the wall and murmuring comments amongst themselves that Charles had a hard time believing was honest English. “Are you busy tomorrow? Or, like. Any day of this week. Any week, really. How long do these gallery things go for?” 

[caralikesdix2-blog]

It was awkward, that much was for sure but if he wanted to pretend they had never mattered to each other then that was his choice and his choice alone. “Yeah well, on second thought, I’ve got quite a bit of stuff to do, so I’ll leave you guys to it. I don’t want to intrude on your private time together anyway. Uhm, so yeah, I’ll see yah around, Charles.. Tell your mom I said hi, ‘lright.” she grinned, trying to hide the sudden distress that was washing over her. 

[charavibes]

After Cara walked away, Charles may have lasted five minutes — and that was being generous — before he was excusing him to the bathroom just so he could look for her again. It was stupid, honestly. They’d cut off all their ties for a reason and her artwork had clearly rocketed farther than Cara had ever let herself believe that it could, so Charles wasn’t sure why exactly he was wasting his time. She probably had some equally popular, humble artist boyfriend waiting back home at their played out studio apartment with paint splattered everywhere with some shaggy puppy named Rufus. Or whatever. The idea caused a little crease to form between Charles’ eyebrows as he sauntered up to a group of people and curled a couple fingers loosely around Cara’s wrist. “Sorry,” he halfheartedly apologized to the small crowd around her. “I’m gonna steal her for a moment.” 

[charavibes]

caralikesdix2:

“Awesome!” Cara spoke, her excitement only a facade used to mask the fact that she had secretly hoped they both would have declined. “Well, I guess we can start right here,” she muttered, turning to see painting 7.. the one and only portrait that hung in this studio. Well, fuck. Of course they would begin with the 7 foot painting of his face. Something she had completed her second year of college when she was coming to grips with the loss of her former life. Her agent had told her to put it up to show diversity but now she feared it was only showing how creepy she was.

“This, uhm, this was from a series i did in college,” she lied, biting her lip as she struggled to come up with a reason to have made this. “We had to make a series of portraits giving a glance into the people who made us who we are. Friends, family, mentors.. all that. This one came out best, which is why its here..”

Charles purposely averted his eyes away from the painting in front of them, and maybe that just made it more suspicious. ( As if the fact that it was his face blown up to take a seven foot long canvas wasn’t obvious enough. ) His hand adjusted better against Allison’s as some kind of poor excuse of a safety net before he was turning his attention to Cara and noting, “Looks nice.” 

His hand tugged once at the other girl’s, hoping to turn her attention to him rather than the painting. This was a first date; Charles didn’t need her prodding him for past relationships or what-if scenarios with his then best friend. He wasn’t even supposed to see Cara again, nevermind run into her at some random art gallery opening. “Big influence, huh,” Allison murmured, nudging her hand against Charles’. He did his best not to look for any malice between the lines, but all he could do was give her a shrug in response then stepped towards the next exhibit. 

[charavibes]

caralikesdix2:

“Uhm, yeah, it is actually.” she smiled, a sense of accomplishment washing over her as well as a moment of gloating. She had done what he said she never could and in a way that was something she saw as a big deal. “Do you like it? Any pieces in particular you like? I could take a stroll with the two of you an explain a bit. Thats normally something we only do for VIPs but I suppose I can spare some time for an old friend.” she offered with a smile, finally paying his date a little mind. 

She had won. She had come out on top and yet she still felt shitty.. as if something in her life was missing. Had Cara sacrificed too much for her dream? Charles at someone on his arm, someone he probably went home to, hell this lady could have been his wife and all cara had to come home to was a cat and a bottle of win… Maybe he was the one who truly came out on top.”

Charles had all intentions of politely declining. He didn’t need Cara’s success shoved in his face, especially not with the tone of voice she’d adopt and the hour long backstories that would probably come along with every painting about the time she’s spent God only knew where. Charles had hardly even left the town, nevermind accomplished all that he’d gloated he would throughout high school. However, Allison was sure to accept before he could respond with some sort of chipper lilt in her voice. 

“Yeah, why not,” he figured he’d add. He’d hate it. Every single second of it, and Charles would probably have to physically plant his feet whenever they stopped in front of a painting so he wouldn’t end up dragging himself and Allison as far away from the gallery as possible — but maybe a small part of him wanted to find out how Cara had spent all the years of her life he’d missed out on. It was the closest he’d be able to get to being half as decent of a best friend as he’d always promised he’d be.