cole, who had ripped up her ideal thoughts of love and twisted it into his very sick perversion of it, tried to bring her down along with him. tried to constantly make her choose between him and her sisters so he wouldn’t ever face his loneliness. she would do it time and time again because he made her believe that’s the love she deserved overtime. that’s the only love she could ever attain as she was the sibling who often fell towards dark nature. it wasn’t because she was naturally drawn to it. it was because she always believed in change, believed that she could change the darkness. in doing so, it just twisted her insides and left her rotten. made her scared to love. he tore her to shreds, damaging her in so many ways that opening her heart up again would be insufferable. she didn’t want it. to feel the pain, to fall into another trap of emotional and psychological abuse, to give so much power over to someone in the name of love… he warped the most precious and ideal thing she most desired growing up. phoebe hated him for it. she hated him so much… but she also loved him so much that it hurt.