Summary: After meeting the mysterious Ember Claire, will Sylus finally connect the dots as to what really is her role in his life? Just a mere shareholder in Onychinus Group or something more?
Relationship: Sylus Qin | Qin Che | MC (Ember Claire)
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Angst, Mentions of Anxiety and Panic Attacks, Tinaguan ng Anak, Not Beta Read
Language: English, Filipino (and Ilokano)
I let out an exaggerated sigh as I stretched my head to the side. I never had the highest alcohol tolerance but I badly needed a drink last night. I shook my head because I can’t afford to be lax. Mama already has enough pressure on her end with the current rumors. I quickened my steps when I noticed the elevator doors closing. I reached out my arm just in time to stop the doors from closing but that’s when our eyes met.
So she really is staying until the company needs her, huh?
She immediately averted her eyes after just a second of meeting mine.
I stepped in the elevator and stood at the corner opposite of hers. I stole a glance at Claire, my gaze lingering on her ring finger. No wedding ring in sight.
She was referred to as missus though. That board member couldn’t have called her like that by mistake but if she really is married then why is she not wearing a ring?
I leaned on the elevator’s mirrored wall and looked down at the floor.
Why am I getting a feeling that she’s wary of me? It could be how I acted towards her yesterday but why is my heart and mind contradicting?
The elevator is goddamn spacious but there she is at the very end corner. Keeping her distance from me like I am some sort of plague.
Why does her mere presence intrigue me?
Who the hell are you, Ember Claire?
“I’m sorry.” She arched her brow as she spared me with nothing but a short glance.
“I’m sorry that I was rude to you after the meeting yesterday.” I turned my head, curious to see how she’ll react.
“You just wanted to protect your family and this company from a stranger that happens to be part of the board. You don’t have to apologize, Mr. Qin.” Her gaze remained forward and never at me again.
Why does that give me a heavy feeling?
I looked at the woman in front of me curiously, as usual, I couldn’t make out her features in this dream.
“Yes, Mr. Qin?” She smiled, nose scrunching at her teasing remark.
“What does ‘lakay ko’ mean?” She chuckled and faced me with the brightest smile that only I could receive.
“You’re suddenly curious about Ilokano ha! Well, it means, my husband.” I played with her fingers, my touch lingering on the ring that sits perfectly on her finger.
“Oo naman ‘no! If that’s the request of my love then I’ll gladly do so.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. I’m reminded of that dream again. Why now? That voice is so familiar but every time I have a dream about that woman, I can't picture her face no matter how hard I try. I subconsciously rub my ring finger, I don’t know why but ever since I was hospitalized five years ago, doing so brings me some sort of comfort.
The elevator doors opened and Claire bolted straight out. I dismissed my thoughts about the dream and followed right behind her. Apparently the vacant office beside mine has always been hers. I watched her swiftly enter her office in a hurry.
I guess she must hate having her office next to mine, huh?
Is fate playing tricks on me?
I closed the door to my office behind me as I slowly slipped to the floor while tightly clutching my necklace. I bumped my head on the door. Tears welling up my eyes.
He’s so close but so far.
I tried to control my breathing when I heard a loud thud at the office next to mine.
Even after five years apart, I acted out of pure instinct.
I rushed to stand up and head outside. I saw Kieran trying to open the door to Sylus’ office but it wouldn't budge. While Luke was calling help from the maintenance staff.
“Luke! Keep trying to open the door. Ke, I need your help. Follow me.” The twins and I hurry to get through his office because Sylus isn’t responding at the other side.
“Push that bookshelf to the side!” Kieran immediately pushed the bookshelf while I pulled a drawer open and pushed the hidden compartment to take the key hidden in it.
Sakto ay naitulak na ni Kieran ‘yung bookshelf para hindi na ‘yun nakaharang sa connecting door papasok sa opisina ni Sylus. He had this built after I officially joined Onychinus Group. Saying that, he doesn’t want to walk around from the doors to his office just to get to mine. Well, after he lost his memories I had it covered. I shakily pushed the key in and turned it. When it unlocked, Kieran and I pushed the door together.
My breath hitched as I saw Sylus on the floor, unconscious. Without thinking clearly, I rushed to his side, gently laid his head on my lap, and quickly checked if he hit something upon fainting.
“Kieran! Open that main door and call for the stand by medical personnel! Hurry!” Kieran didn’t need to be told twice. We all knew how delicate it could be for him to faint. My hands were trembling as I tried to gently shake him awake.
“S-Sy..lus.. please… wake up… come on. Don’t do… this to me… not again.” My hands were shaking as I tried to gently shake him awake.
“Ate…” I turned to see Luke enter the office with a worry filled expression. My breathing was starting to become uncontrollable until I felt a tug on my necklace.
Didn’t I tuck my necklace underneath my satin blouse earlier?
With as much composure I could muster, I looked down at Sylus.
“This ring… why is this ring… with you? and why does… the other one have… my name engraved… on it?”
Wala akong masabi at kung meron, ano naman ang masasabi ko na papaniwalaan niya?
“Not now, Luke. I need you… to leave us.” Kieran then arrived with the medical staff but Sylus waved them off as he got up.
“But you need to be checked, Kuya, especially your head-“
“It was just a migraine. I won’t ask twice, bal.” The twins looked at me worriedly. They don’t know what to do. We knew the risks it could do to his brain if we followed what he’s requesting but further stress to his brain could also lead to more problems. I let out a heavy sigh and nodded my head toward the twins.
“Go, I’ll call you both if we need something but have the medical staff on standby outside the office.” Kieran seemed like he didn’t want to budge until Luke had to gently pull him out of the room. The twins had both sad and worried expressions as they softly closed the doors.
Sylus slowly walked towards his desk and leaned on it while looking directly at my exposed necklace. I couldn’t look at him. I clenched my fist to prevent it from shaking.
“You know, I’ve had these dreams for the past five years. The face of the woman was always blurry and no matter how much I dream about her, I could never see her face but the one thing I engraved in my head is that damned ring.”
I want to run away. If I wasn’t careless, if I gave my actions more thought, we wouldn’t be in this situation right now. I wouldn’t be risking his wellbeing just because I acted out of panic for a second.
“Are you the woman in my dreams, Claire?”
I couldn’t muster a single word.
“Answer me, Claire, p-please…” I pushed down the lump forming in my throat.
“No.” By God and whatever will I have left, I looked at his ruby eyes with a fake sense of determination.
“Don’t fucking lie to me, Ember Claire.”
“Then how can you explain my name on that ring? And those two rings that you’ve been hiding in the guise of a necklace, huh?” Sylus stood straight from leaning on the table and slowly walked towards me. My eyes widened as I backed away when he tried to reach for me.
“W-wag ka… lalapit.” I could no longer control my breathing, my vision becoming blurry by the second, and my heart is racing like I just ran a marathon.
“Em?” I couldn’t see what expression he’s showing me but why was his voice so gentle? Just like the way he used to talk to me 6 years ago. I tightly clutched my chest, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. I weakly tried to slam my fist on my chest. I feel like I’m choking or drowning.
“Ember! Sweetheart!” Darkness began to seep through my vision, their voices began to muffle until I fully succumbed to the darkness. With my last vision being Sylus’ face. Why did he look so scared to death?
“Hon, I know you’re worried but for our little peas, can you slow down, hm?”
“Hon naman, this is Claire we’re talking about. She hasn’t had an attack this bad for years!”
“I know, hon, but she’ll stay in the room naman. She won’t go anywhere so why don’t we slow down and take a breather, hm? please?” I let out a huff as Zayne slowly guided me to breathe in and out while gently rubbing my lower back in an attempt to calm me down. After a few seconds, we continued our way to Claire’s room.
“Buti na lang talaga at si Cole ang naka toka mag-bantay kay baby Sola ngayon. Ayaw ko muna ibalita kay Tara e, maka-cut short pa ‘yung matagal na nilang plano na Europe trip ni Greyson.”
“There’s no doubt she’ll drop everything once she hears what happened to Claire.” Zayne sighed as he finally managed to make his wife calm down. That’s until they got to Claire’s room.
Napa singhap si Cassie nang makita ang lagay ng kanyang kaibigan. Ngayon na lang niya nakitang ganito ang lagay ni Claire pero ang kanyang pag-alala ay nabahiran ng galit nang makita si Sylus na naka upo sa gilid.
“Fuck. Hon-“ Zayne held her arm but Cassie paid no mind to it. She arched her brow towards Sylus who held nothing but an apologetic gaze.
“Anong ginagawa mo dito?” She walked or more like grumpily waddled towards her friend’s hospital bed. Zayne bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing. His wife was too cute to even appear scary for him but maybe for Sylus, Cassie Li’s anger was seething.
Cassie sighed before holding Claire’s hand. Rubbing her thumb against her slightly cold hand. Her unwavering concerned gaze towards her friend was immediately replaced with exasperation as she glared at Sylus.
“What did you do, Sylus Qin? You really had to bulldoze yourself in her life, huh? Alam mo ba’ng ngayon na lang ulit siya nagka-severe panic attack na ganito? Of course you have no clue! Kinalimutan mo-“
“Cassie.” Zayne cut his wife off, shaking his head. It wasn’t their place to say.
“Pasalamat ka at buntis ako, Mr. Qin. Kasi kung hindi baka kinaladkad na kita palabas ng suite na ‘to at wala akong pake kung malaki ang shares niyo dito sa hospital namin. Ibang usapan na kapag damay si Claire.”
“How long has she had these panic attacks?” The couple turned their heads towards the door.
“Tita Sylvia…” Cassie cleared her throat. Sylvia Qin is listed as her emergency contact after Sylus’ accident but she didn’t want to divulge much information as Sylus was in the room.
“It started five years ago po.” She averted her gaze away from Sylus. This is a very sensitive topic for everyone in the room. The room went silent, nobody dared to talk.
Claire groaned as she opened her eyes, slowly adjusting to the light in the room.
“Oh, take it easy, Em… Hon, paki naman.” Inalalayan ni Cassie si Claire maka-upo. While Zayne adjusted the height of the bed and began checking her vitals.
“No, you’re not.” Sabay pang tugon ng mag-asawang Li. Claire couldn’t do anything but let out an exaggerated sigh and let the two doctors do their work.
“Any dizziness? Headaches? Chest pains?”
“Nope… like I said, I am a-okay. Na overstimulate lang siguro ako and spiraled…” Zayne and Cassie gave each other a knowing look. While her current vitals were indeed okay, deep down, she is nowhere near okay.
“Can I have a moment alone with my wife?” I felt everyone turn their heads to Sylus but me.
“Em?” Cassie held my hand assuringly.
“Give us a moment alone. Please.” Cassie sighed and nodded. She was worried to bits for me but it’s what I wanted. Zayne helped her stand up as she gave me a smile before leaving the room with Mama. As soon as the door closed, we were enveloped by silence.
Wow, ang ganda naman ng view sa labas.
Kinnametten talaga! Para akong masusuka dahil sobrang tahimik.
Lord, I refuse to look at him. Pwede ba’ng magpanggap na lang akong bingi?
“Ano? ang kulit mo ah. Narinig mo naman sinabi nina Zayne kanina tungkol sa vitals ko just a few seconds ago.”
“I am asking you and not whatever medical assessment that guy said.”
“That guy you're pertaining to is asawa ng kaibigan ko and the top cardiac surgeon of this country. He went out of his way para samahan si Cassie dahil sa katangahan ko so please tread your words carefully.”
“Well, I don’t give a damn and katangahan? Em, you fainted because of me. Why would you phrase it like that?”
“Because we aren’t supposed to be in this situation in the first place.”
“W-what? What are you talking about? Are you saying that I shouldn’t have remembered you in the first place?”
“Yeah…” I looked towards the window again. I refused to look at him even though I felt the bed dip and his hand caressing mine.
“Why?” I pulled my hand away from his grasp.
“Aren’t you thinking what kind of risk you’re putting your brain through just to remember me? Bakit sa tingin mo pinili kong lumipat ng ibang bansa, malayo sa’yo ha? Your doctor said it was life threatening to push your brain to remember the memories you lost. Sa tingin mo kaya kong gawin sa’yo ‘yun, Sylus ha? Ano-“
My words were cut off as he gave me a chaste kiss. I was dumbfounded. Not long after he pulled back, he kissed my forehead, his lips lingering over my racing thoughts.
“What you didn’t account for was that you’ve plagued my head for years, Em… Earlier, I was able to finally piece together the face of the woman that I’ve been dreaming about. Yes, it gave me a piercing migraine and if it still worries you, Mama and Papa forced me to get myself checked the moment you were transferred here, haha… I didn’t want to leave your side but the doctor gave me the all clear, baket ko…[my wife] My head is perfectly fine.”
I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down my face. Sylus cupped my cheeks as he wiped my tears.
“Tahan na, ayat ko- [mahal ko/my love] Em!” I pushed him with all the little strength I have left and frustratingly hit his chest.
“Ang tagal-tagal mo! Ang tagal-tagal mo, Sylus!” I continued hitting him as I cried, even though it was everything that I’ve got in me, for him it only felt like weak hits. He gently held my wrists as I cried my frustrations out.
“I waited… for so long! Bakit n-ngayon ka… lang?!” I dropped my arms and leaned the crown of my head to his chest as I broke down. I felt Sylus gently kiss the top of my head. He then leveled his face against mine, he fixed the strands of hair that were sticking to my face.
“Sorry, Em… alam ko… ‘di ba sinabi ko sa’yo, for as long as we both shall live? Kahit nakalimutan kita, Em, hinding-hindi ka nawala dito…” He clutched my hand and placed it on his chest.
“Sa puso ko.” At this point, I could barely care that I was ugly crying. Although our emotional reunion was cut off as the door burst open.
“Wai you huwting my momma?!” I couldn’t gather my bearings as I witnessed Sola hit Sylus with punches that barely affected her own dada.
“Ow! I will never hurt your momma, sweetheart.”
“You unintentionally kinda did though…” I muttered under my breath.
“Alright, one at a time, girls. Can we please discuss that after you explain everything to our daughter?” I gave him a surprised look.
“Paano ka sure na anak mo si Sola, aber?” As expected, I received a very offended look from Sylus. He shook his head as he clicked his tongue.
“Just because I’m not wearing our wedding rings doesn’t mean we’re not married anymore and for the record, Sola looks about four years old. That sounds about the right age after you left the Philippines because of my accident. So that means you were already carrying her the moment-“ I rolled my eyes and covered his mouth. I could feel him smirking against my palms.
Puwede ba’ng ibagok ko na lang ulit ulo nito?! Tarupam! [Mukha mo!]
“Ayaw mo tanggalin kamay mo, baket ko?” The fucker even had the audacity to arch his brow.
Bakit napaka pogi?! Ay! Teka nga! Huli kong tanda, naiinis pa ako sa kanya!
“Ayaw mo talaga ha?” He gave my palm a lick. I let out a shriek that even our daughter stopped hitting Sylus just to stare at me. I pulled the blanket up and covered this bastard’s face.
“Sylus Qin! May bata oh!”
“You were covering my mouth, sweetie. I’m pretty sure our Sola doesn’t have any clue to what I did.”
“Tapos na kayo mag-landian sa harap ng bata?” While still towering over Sylus with a blanket, Cole entered the room and carried Sola.
“Sorry ah, nag puppy eyes kasi sa akin. Gusto ka daw makita ng bebe. Hindi ko naman matiis.”
“Okay lang, Cole. Thank you for bringing her, nasa office ‘yung mag asawa. Ako na bahala kay Sola.” I opened my arms as Cole handed me our darling girl. Sola immediately snuggled on the crook of my neck, she doesn’t even mind that her dada is in front of her, still covered with a blanket though.
“Message or call us if gusto mo muna ma-solo asawa mo.” Cole winked at me before leaving the room. That girl really, geez, I could feel the tips of my ears burning.
“Awe wyu otay, momma?” Sola looked up at me while pouting.
Ang cute-cute talaga ng Sola namin! Napaka worth it lahat ng pagod sa pagiging ina kasi bawing-bawi ng baby namin!
“Momma is okay, baby… were you worried?” I combed her hair as she showed me her cutest smile.
“a bwit! bwut sowa know momma ko stwong!”
Haaay! Cute-ness aggression please! Gusto ko na lang kurutin pisngi ng anak ko!
But since I can only pinch her cheeks gently, I showered our baby girl with kisses as she laughed because it easily tickles her.
“Pwede may kiss din ako?” Sylus removed the blanket from his head and peeked at us.
“Nwo wan ken kith momma bwut sowa!” Sylus sat up and chuckled at our daughter.
“Paano ba ‘yan? I got to kiss her first before you were even born, Sola.” Nag-shrug pa ang loko. Hay, kawawa naman ‘tong anak namin kasi may pala asar siyang dada. Sola puffed her cheeks and glared at him.
“Nwo wyu dident!” Our darling girl even crossed her arms! Ang cute ng mag-ama ko!
“Oh but I did. If I didn’t kiss your momma then you wouldn’t be here right now. Right, momma?” I ignored Sylus. Napaka landing nilalang talaga.
Sola turned her head to the side as she stared at her dada. She alternately looked at Sylus and me before stopping at Sylus.
“Wyu sowa’s dada?” Sylus looked at me like he was asking permission which was silly because I never kept him a secret from Sola. I smiled at him and nodded. He mouthed a thank you before looking back down at Sola who was in between us.
“Y-yeah… I’m your dada, Sola…”
“Wyu nwat buthy anymow? Momma seyd wyu oweyth buthy dath wai wyu nwat gwo to japwan…” Sylus clenched his jaw, I held his hand and rubbed my thumb over his knuckles, in an attempt to calm him down. I knew he was trying his best not to cry.
“Mhm… I’m sorry if ngayon lang si dada… b-babawi ako… sa inyong dalawa… Sola. I promise.”
“Otway pwo! Pwingky pwomith!” Sola held her tiny pinky out towards Sylus as tears threatened to leave his eyes. He chuckled and curled his own pinky with Sola’s. Our darling girl scrunched her nose as she laughed and surprised Sylus by hugging him tight. I found myself starting to tear up as Sylus tightly held our daughter. He lifted his head and reached out for my hand, intertwining them together.
“Uwi na tayo?” I smiled and gave him a nod.