Welcome to Dragon Army

Hi! My name is Jenny! My blog is basically just a hodge podge of everything. Feel free to message me. :)

[oyaria]

[searching-for-repentance]

The Thot has no power over the simple, hard working man

[rjwps]

I had an idea for D&D

[textonly]

[sartanator3001]

[marisatomay]

gays are bad at math because instead of spreading it evenly so all gays are moderately competent at math the talent is heavily concentrated into a chosen few but it takes a long time to recharge The Math Gay Battery which is why Isaac Newton and Jon Lovett were born 300 years apart

[queenaneesrevenge]

Alan Turing cost us 100 years of math skills

[alepito]

Mom says its my turn to use the math

[valtsv]

[officialspec]

gender reveal came back negative

[samueltanders]

Lee, Zak failed basic flight. Or at least he should have, but he didn’t. Because I passed him. His technique was sloppy and he had no feel for flying, but I passed him. Because he and I … Because I felt something and I let it get in the way of me doing my job and I couldn’t fail him.

[dynamic-dynasty]

It’s true though.

[non-bender-world]

Can we consider how many people Toph caused internal bleeding and broken bones?

[comradekatara]

oh honey they are fully dead

[chemicalmagecraft]

No but Toph was a professional earthbending wrestler with the power to feel the whole human body at once through vibrations with enough accuracy to tell lies. She knows exactly how much pressure the human body can take before important things start breaking or I’ll go buy a hat for the sole purpose of eating it.

[comradekatara]

oh, sure. she doesn't care though. she's 12 and she's thriving and she loves to murder

[sussura]

Aang: I have to defeat Ozai, but I don’t think I can murder anyone

Toph: I can do it.

Aang:

Toph: I’ve killed like 20 people since we met

Aang:

Sokka:

Katara:

[panpteryx]

Toph: I mean you guys have killed a bunch of people too

Aang: what no I haven’t I’ve never killed anyone!

Toph: twinkletoes you pick people up and drop them and blow them into walls. katara hits people with water hard enough to throw them to the ground and encases them in ice. Zuko’s straight-up throwing fire at people. Sokka hits people with a club.

Katara:

Aang:

Sokka:

Toph: when you hit people really hard they often die. I mean, I feel it every time. not counting the head trauma and frostbite that probably means they die later.

Toph: ....did you guys not know you were killing people?

Zuko: I mean I wasn’t going to bring it up but she’s right

Toph: I thought we were all doing it on purpose!

Zuko: it’s all in self-defense, it’s not like we’re going out of our way to kill people, but these things happen. Sometimes people have to die to protect everyone else. I thought you understood that already

Katara:

Sokka:

Aang:

Aang:

Aang: *extremely loud airbender scream*

[pervocracy]

child handling for the childless nurse

My current job has me working with children, which is kind of a weird shock after years in environments where a “young” patient is 40 years old.  Here’s my impressions so far:

Birth - 1 year: Essentially a small cute animal.  Handle accordingly; gently and affectionately, but relying heavily on the caregivers and with no real expectation of cooperation.

Age 1 - 2: Hates you.  Hates you so much.  You can smile, you can coo, you can attempt to soothe; they hate you anyway, because you’re a stranger and you’re scary and you’re touching them.  There’s no winning this so just get it over with as quickly and non-traumatically as possible.

Age 3 - 5: Nervous around medical things, but possible to soothe.  Easily upset, but also easily distracted from the thing that upset them.  Smartphone cartoons and “who wants a sticker?!!?!?” are key management techniques.

Age 6 - 10: Really cool, actually.  I did not realize kids were this cool.  Around this age they tend to be fairly outgoing, and super curious and eager to learn.  Absolutely do not babytalk; instead, flatter them with how grown-up they are, teach them some Fun Gross Medical Facts, and introduce potentially frightening experiences with “hey, you want to see something really cool?”

Age 11 - 14: Extremely variable.  Can be very childish or very mature, or rapidly switch from one mode to the other.  At this point you can almost treat them as an adult, just… a really sensitive and unpredictable adult.  Do not, under any circumstances, offer stickers.  (But they might grab one out of the bin anyway.)

Age 15 - 18: Basically an adult with severely limited life experience.  Treat as an adult who needs a little extra education with their care.  Keep parents out of the room as much as possible, unless the kid wants them there.  At this point you can go ahead and offer stickers again, because they’ll probably think it’s funny.  And they’ll want one.  Deep down, everyone wants a sticker.

[mikkeneko]

This is also a pretty excellent guide to writing  kids of various ages

[enjambament]

Good guide. It is one of my biggest pet peeves when 6-10 year olds are all written like 3-4 year olds. Positively cringey. If in doubt err on the side of the kid being more mature than you expect.

[qthewetsprocket]

if in doubt err of the side of the kid being more mature than you expect

[consultingfangirl221-deactivate]

I’m 29 and I want a sticker.

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

an array of supremely unsexy happenings

[soulofthebloodofthewolf-deactiv]

a number of goings-on that just werent very cash money

[mjalti]

I used to think i was introverted bc I really liked being alone but it turns out I just like being at peace & I am very extroverted when I’m around people who bring me peace

[dankmemeuniversity]

[luxwing]

I think it is brave and also very sexy of me to continue living

[succulentbud]

shout out to all the brave and very sexy individuals who are still here with us despite life being tough. that's extremely voluptuous and your meat is huge

[danisnotonfires]

[neyruto]

Cowboys are witches and horses are their familiars

[istillfuckwithdemilovato-deacti]

guns are their wands and they only know one spell (bullet)

[setheverman]

what is the january mood?

[whirlybirbs]