Last night as I was scrolling through my newsfeed on Facebook, an act I usually only succumb to at times of severe boredom due to the high levels of ignorance that occupy the social media site. Of course, last night was no exception.
I thought about discussing the MRA (Men’s Rights Activist) Santa Barbra shooter, whose misogynist videos recently went viral and shocked much of America. But after stumbling upon a particularly disturbing post a Facebook friend had shared from tickld.com and watching the absolute ignorance unfold in her comments I knew I could not pass up the opportunity to examine it.
Before you read the this post I would suggest first reading the tickld post that started it all, HERE.
I’ll start off with saying this: No, I don’t believe resorting to violence was the best way for this girl to handle the situation, but after being sexually harassed (in front of an entire cafeteria of your peers) by several males I don’t know many people who would have reacted differently.
What amazed me most about this post was that the administration blamed her first for retaliating against her attacker and then had the audacity to say “Well maybe if you hadn’t wore such suggestive attire.” If you look at the photo she provided you’ll see that the dress almost hits her knees and the cut is not what many would call “suggestive.”
Yes, there is a minor amount of cleavage present, but the most important question surrounding this post is, are we going to blame girls for their attire and genes every time a boy harasses them or are we going to hold boys accountable for their actions? I found some interesting answers from the men in my Facebook friend’s comment section.
First from a young man who said this
While I did not necessarily agree with his statement, I thought he was headed in the right direction. That is until he posted this
Remember ladies if you’re going to walk out of your home wearing a dress be sure you can handle the heavy responsibility of being a walking distraction to men who are somehow able to be fully functioning members of society but in the same breath cannot control themselves around bare knees.
Unfortunately the comments only got worse (and weirder) when another male decides to give his two cents on the conversation.
I want so badly to rant on this guy’s need to speak for an entire race but that is a topic for another day. Instead I’ll address each of his unsupported theories. So his overall point is that “It isn’t the item of clothing that is the problem,” his point A states that sometimes what matters is the person wearing the clothing, point B states that it can also be the place you wear it, and finally point C his “personal favorite” how they wear it. I could go in depth on each of these points but last I checked none of them we’re an acceptable excuse for sexual harassment.
For most of the post this guy continues to spew more garbage about “Social Ideology” and other things having nothing to do with the real problem and much of it is written so carelessly that it is extremely difficult to even understand.
While the males in the Facebook comments make the future of humanity look dark and obscure, the women who made their opinions clear give us some light at the end of this frustrating tunnel.
Someone is finally catching on.
One girl writes a particularly touching comment about her experience dealing with the negative way people react to the way her clothes fit.
Though the comment continues for a while longer you get the gist of the experiences she has gone through because of our warped culture. Perhaps the most heartbreaking part of her comment is that society has blamed her for her body, successfully convincing an innocent girl that she is “awkwardly shaped” and “cursed” with her own body.
How did it get this bad? How did it become acceptable for boys to harass girls for what they wear? When will girls stop having to hear the notoriously frustrating line of “boys will be boys”? When will parents be parents and teach their children that they have no right to judge or hassle someone because of what they are wearing and worse, the shape and size of their body. When will writers be able to stop writing about current events in Rape Culture and start writing the history of it?
