Junkie K @confessions-ofa-druggie - Tumblr Blog

I need help, I’m young, like very young (under 15) and I started drinking and smoking weed at 13, and recently I started sipping lean. My dad is a recovering drug addict so I kind of grew up around drugs. I have no self control and I’m so scared if somebody offers me a hard drug I wont be able to say no. I also feel myself craving lean more and more, I ran out of codeine and almost started sobbing lmaoo, i don’t think it’s bad enough that I need to get help but it already fucked up my brain tbh

If you’re sobbing from running out of a drug THEN YES YOU NEED HELP. Doesn’t matter your age and the fact that your dad is a drug addict is a big warning sign that you’re susceptible to addiction...GET HELP.

Been strung out on hydros and vodka foralmosta week now.Feels good haha

That’s gonna be a shit comedown

I'm 177 days dry, but I heard of this drug that feels like alcohol. So I started doing that--and it really does feel almost the same way. But it's a date rape drug. And it's destroying my everything. And I keep trying to make other drugs fill that need, but they won't. I'm coming down from a shrooms trip where I tried to make my closest friend stop being my friend. At this rate, it feels like I might as well start drinking again. I can't take myself seriously anymore. I don't know what to do

Alcoholics and addicts are one in the same. You can’t escape drinking by doing drugs and vice versa. Go to a meeting.

I'm almost 20 and The past year I've been doing A LOT of blow, it was only on weekends but my band and I would go Absolutely crazy with it after a gig or at practice, I started to see it was becoming a bad habit for me and tried to clean up, I was a month and 3 days clean, but the other night I was partying with friends I haven't seen in a long ass time and they brought that booger sugar to you know party have a good time nd shit, I feel bad about it but I don't feel phased at all /:

Meeting time!

First and foremost, I love meth. Started using in September. I haven’t gone off the deep end yet. It hasn’t affected my career. I’m a little short fused to friends and loved ones on my off days. But I was like that before meth. I look forward to the chaos of using, when I’m clean. Haven’t used since Thursday night. I work Fri-Sun. So Sunday night around 9pm I’ll be doing a line, probably before I leave the office lol

I have never met anyone who can use meth casually, and I’m sorry to say you aren’t going to be the first. I’d quit before the snake bites ya

I've been clean for 24 days. I was hiding my addiction from everyone in my life including my parents and my husband. My husband didn't take the news well at all and asked for a divorce after finding out how bad my addiction was. So now I'm staying with my family while I'm in recovery. Hurting him is the hardest and the worst thing I did. Making amends and asking forgiveness doesn't always mean you'll get forgiven but how do I forgive myself for hurting him

It’ll take time. The 12 steps will help you forgive yourself.

I'm really struggling to not go get some dxm which is my gateway and I don't know what to do

Go to a meeting.

Do you consider alcohol a drug?

Absolutely.

I'm recovering and taking responsibility for what I've done as a drug addict. But they think I'm playing the victim role. I am a victim, that's how I became a drug addict. Nobody but me seems to be acknowledging my harmful behavior and it hurts.

This is where the first step comes in handy. You're powerless over how other people act and react. I know it sucks, but remember that you're apologizing to the people you hurt to make amends...if that's how they choose to react to your amends, then that's on them.

I'm 17, I am sobering up, tapering off of Xanax after using for 2 years. I'm 15 days in, I have relapsed 2-3x on other drugs, but I manage to actually get through the weeks sober. I miss coke and Ritalin so much, and ketamine + alcohol... Yet I have never felt so successful and strong, for the first time in 3 years. I want a life where I can progress and grow. Drugs take that away from me. I just want the pain to go, I feel alone. Everybody around me drinks. I am so scared to lose myself again.

First, I just wanted to say I'm proud of you...it's so awesome you're getting off this shit young. Secondly, do you go to meetings? You can connect with lots of people and get the support you need :)

Lost a friend to the disease.

Just a reminder it'll take anyone it can...this disease shows no mercy.

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I blew eight grand that was left to me in a will to get me through uni on cocaine. I don't know what to do. I want to die. I'm clean now for the first time in years. I don't ever want to touch it again. But I'm broke and returning to uni after attempted suicide and I can't tell my parents that I can't pay my way. What do I do.

I'm sorry :( you have to be HONEST....a part of getting clean is doing things completely different than how you would in active addiction. You wouldn't be honest while using...so it's important to be honest now. And it's okay to ask for help. Besides, if you're working a 12 step program, it's going to come out anyways. This feeling you have right now? It's not going to last, I promise. You're rebuilding your life, the life addiction fucked with. As long as you stay clean, every day will get a little better.

I'm almost 22 yrs old. I've been going to NA since feb 21, 2017 and it helped me put together 60 days clean from crystal, dilaudid, vicodin, percs, norcos, xans, and alcohol (cuz it's a drug). I have a sponsor and was working the first step, n I relapse, and stay out until June 19, 2017. I have 30 days of honest cleantime. But I've slipped up. And I just can't go back and be a newcomer again. But at the same time I want to so badly. Having a head full of program n a head full of drugs sucks.

I know it sucks because I've been a newcomer a bunch of times, but it's so worth it and you'll feel so good once those 30 days pass. Besides, it's a big accomplishment to get clean...you should be proud of your clean-time, even if it's a day!

I'm 17. I started stealing Percs and Oxy from my family, and now I can't go a day without it. It quiets the thoughts. The ones that make me outrageous and the high energy that makes people sick of me. It makes me more manageable, and patient. But I'm also a 17 year old drug addict whose friends are close to finding out and who is stealing from their own family. Do I continue doing it and be a better person? More patient and kind and easier to get along with? Or do I stop taking fucking drugs?

Stop taking drugs. You think you're a better person to be around...but what 'better person' steals from the people they love? That's the addiction convincing you to keep using. See, drug addiction is like a snake. It wraps around your neck and at first it's cool, it's not choking you or anything. But one day you suddenly find it hard to breathe and before you know it, that motherfucker is strangling you. I promise you're either in denial and not a better person, or you're about to find out drug addiction is awful and NOT your friend. I would suggest a couple of things: 1) find NA. Let them support you. Admit to your family you have a problem and need help. Get the help you need so you can be a better person without stealing from your family. 2) I'd also suggest talking to a therapist/psychologist...we all have demons we want to drown, and I promise there's a better way to stop them!! Good luck!

I'm terrified of my future. I'm 38 weeks pregnant with my first child. I just turned 20 last Thursday. I've been clean almost 11 months. But I don't know if I'll be able to stay sober. I'm torn between my two beings; my sober self and my IV heroin addict self. I want to be a good mom. I want to be a good daughter. And friend. And wife some day. I want to get high so badly. I've considered waiting until my deferred disposition is over next year. It's getting so hard..

Congrats on 11 months and your baby! That's two miracles right there. I'm 34 weeks pregnant...it's an amazing feeling growing a baby :) BUT it's also really hard...take it easy on yourself. Take it ONE DAY at a time...one second if you have to, and don't feel bad if you want to get high, the important thing is you AREN'T getting high. Do you have any meetings in your area that you can go to? Stay strong, I believe in you!

I had been clean for just over a year when i relapsed. I'm fucking hooked on painkillers and it scares me to admit. I have no one to turn to and nowhere to go. I thought i was over all this but i guess i'm not. . . once an addict, always an addict, right?

Unfortunately that's how it gets us...a little voice in our ear whispers "you were never really an addict. If you do this differently, it'll be okay. Just one more time..." and then we're back in the same vicious cycle. You aren't alone though, no matter what it tells you. Do you go to meetings? They'll always welcome you back with open arms.

Thank you for posting "10 reasons to not relapse". I was about to relapse, and you stopped me. I cant thank you enough. My birthday is coming up, and if i stay clean, until then (and stay clean after that of course) this will be my longest time clean since i have started. Best birthday present ever. Thanks so much.

That's so good to hear :) happy early birthday! Congratulations on the clean time, one day at a time ❤️

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