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Old with the old, in with the new CountGameula.com

Apologies for the lack of posts in the past week, but it's because I been slaving away, along with my team of Renfields, to launch the new CountGameula.com. It looks awesome, with dedicated pages for videos, screens, reviews, news, interviews and previews. That's a lot for one person to handle, so I'll be soliciting writers after the launch. It should be ready for mass consumption by the end of this week, but in the meantime you'll have to visit twitter for all your gaming goodness.

-kristen spencer

Smuggle Truck gets makeover after App Store rejection

What do you do when your controversy courting iOS game about shuttling illegal immigrants across the border gets rejected by Apple’s arbiters of good taste? Why, you just tweak some art assets so Smuggle Truck becomes Snuggle Truck!

“The changes made to the game consist only of minor art changes and some swapped sound effects. Gameplay remains exactly the same,” Owlchemy’s Alex Schwartz said in an interview with Joystiq. “Instead of smuggling immigrants over the border, you’re now bringing animals from the wilderness into the comfort of a zoo, where they are provided plenty of food, water, shelter, and state of the art health care.”

Instead of smiling Mexican babies bouncing out of the back of your speeding flatbed, you’ll get an adorable assortment of bunnies, rabbits and bears, though Mac and PC players will have both. That release costs a couple dollars more, but allows you to switch between the cuddly Snuggle Truck and controversial Smuggle Truck with the press of a button.

Snuggle Truck is available now on the App Store for iPhone ($2) and iPad ($3) and on Mac/PC ($5).

-kristen spencer

Call of Juarez: The Cartel story trailer mixes wild west with grand theft

Despite its mediocre Metacritic score, I enjoyed the hell out of Call of Juarez: Bound In Blood, Techland’s surprisingly sturdy take on the nitty, gritty western.

Hence my confusion over Call of Juarez: The Cartel, which trades the best part of the series – the wild west setting – for a present-day urban war zone, complete with the Grand Theft staples of mob bosses, drug lords and gang members. What they’ve kept, according to this latest story trailer, is the series’ sense of moral ambiguity, weaving a tale of modern gunslingers from the DEA, FBI and LAPD waging war against lawlessness on both sides of the border. Think The Shield, but with Walker Texas Ranger’s wardrobe.

Though I can’t pass judgment before playing the finished game, which for all we know could elevate Michael Bay parody to Kaufman-esque levels of genius, I can tell you that the last thing gamedom needs is another nightclub gunfight level. Trash a coffee bar, an irish pub, or the outdoor seating area of pricey, but nonetheless popular bistro. I don’t care, just no more nightclubs. Those dancing girls’ hiring bonus doesn’t cover health insurance.

-kristen spencer

The Witcher 2 coming to consoles, seriously this time

The console port of The Witcher: Rise of the White Wolf never materialized, though not for lack of trying, but there’s still hope that The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings will be coming to Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 as well as PC, says Polish PS3 site Polska.

According to a translated television interview, CD Projekt RED’s Michael Kicinski has confirmed that “Yes, [console versions are] for us an entirely new project. But of course, already working on it. You can expect that during such events as the largest fair in the world of computer games, or E3 and Gamescom inform you about what is currently working on.”

Just in case you’re worried a few misplaced pronouns in “Google translate” could be getting your hopes up for nothing, Polka assures that “this is not a statement or taken out of context or incorrectly translated.”

-kristen spencer

Make room in your closet for the Three Turret Moon t-shirt

Okamiden, Minecraft, and World of Warcraft have all put their game-specific spin on that timeless staple of elegant casual wear, the Three Wolf Moon t-shirt, but there’s just something about Valve’s take on the fashion forward meme.

I think it’s the eyes. Or rather, it’s the eye. Those red cyclopean windows into the turrets’ complete lack of souls on the Portal 2 inspired Three Turret Moon t-shirt really captures the raw sexual energy of the original wolf pack. My only complaint is that they didn’t superimpose GLaDOS over the moon’s craggy face, but that would probably have been too much awesome to cram into a single wash cycle. Especially if you tossed it in the same load as your Three Keyboard Cat Moon t-shirt.

-kristen spencer

Epic: cheap app store games are “killing us”

Angry Birds fills Epic Games’ heart with, unironically, anger. Their hatred is not reserved solely for revenge-seeking avians, but pretty much all cheap mobile games, and in particular the dreaded dollar app, which the developer claims will be the death of boxed games.

“If there’s anything that’s killing us [in the traditional games business] it’s dollar apps,” said Epic Games’ Mike Capps. “How do you sell someone a $60 game that’s really worth it? They’re used to 99 cents. As I said, it’s an uncertain time in the industry. But it’s an exciting time for whoever picks the right path and wins.”

“We have not been this uncertain about what’s coming next in the games industry since Epic’s been around for 20 years,” he continued. “We’re at such an inflection point. Will there be physical distribution in 10 years or even five? Will anyone care about the next console generation? What’s going on in PC? Can you make money on PC if it’s not a connected game? What’s going on in mobile? Tons of really scary things.”

I’ll concede that mobile gaming is helping itself to a bigger slice of the consumer cash pie than ever before, but there’s no way it’s muscling traditional gaming away from the table. You just can’t compare the two. I mean, sure, a $5 handy behind the dumpster at the Popeye’s Chicken will get the job done just as well as an evening with a high price escort, but only one leaves you gently weeping into a 10-piece bucket. The real issue isn’t cost, but value, which is where traditional gaming needs to step it up.

Quit focusing on price gouging and start focusing on making games not destined for the bargain bin, 'cause that Popeye's line 'aint getting shorter.

-kristen spencer

Alice: Madness Returns to include code for original game

For those of you who missed out on American McGee’s Alice, the delightfully dark PC-only release that marked EA’s first foray into M-rated games, you’ll get you chance this June 14. The developer has confirmed that the upcoming sequel, Alice: Madness Returns, will ship with a code to download the 2000 original on PC, Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3.

“There’s also going to be [a] pretty significant release which is the original Alice brought over to the consoles so that a person who’s purchased Madness Returns gets a download code and is able to bring Alice 1 onto their console and play through the entire original game alongside playing Madness Returns,” the developer said in an interview with CVG. “There will [also] be DLC in the form of dresses that the player can download and Alice can wear [that] come with special abilities and enhance how you play through the game.”

No word on whether the download code or the dresses will be made available for free, for fee or as part of some exclusive pre-order shenanigans, but let’s focus on the positive – American McGee’s Alice is getting ported to consoles. Not that I didn’t enjoy the PC release, but navigating all those perilous ledges and dangling ropes should be a lot less frustrating with a controller. And even if it’s not, I’ll hopefully be distracted by the (fingers crossed) remastered HD graphics of Alice’s twisted trek through the looking glass.

-kristen spencer

Blind gamer Terry Garrett plays it by ear

The next time you’re bitching about the difficulty of your latest videogame acquisition, let me simultaneously humble and inspire you with the reminder that 23-year old college student Terry Garrett, who lost his sight at the age of 10, can navigate Oddworld: Abe’s Oddysee and Oddworld: Abe’s Exoddus with near-perfect precision by sound alone. Garret uses “sound landmarks,” like the whisper of voices, the pounding of a hammer or the shuffle of footsteps, along with quick save, to play through games I never beat even with cheat codes.

He’s currently working his way through The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and through a mechanical engineering degree from the University of Colorado, with plans to become the first blind astronaut.

-kristen spencer

L.A. Noire’s ESRB rating gets graphic

L.A. Noire, Rockstar Game’s decent into a hard-boiled 1940′s pulp detective novel, has reached my favorite stage of the game development life cycle – the ERSB description, which reveals all sorts of story details, coupled with an as always WAY too graphic description of the naughty bits.

The game’s main story will follow rookie Cole Phelps’ mission to stop a deranged serial killer. But first he’ll have to earn his detective’s badge, advancing through the department’s different desks (i.e., Patrol, Traffic Squad, Homicide, Vice, Arson) by solving cases pretty much run the gambit of every Law & Order spin-off ever aired.

According to the spoiler-rific ESRB description, the open world detective story’s “shootouts … highlighted by realistic gunfire, cries of pain, and blood spurts that stain injured characters and the surrounding environment,” would have been more than enough to garner the M rating, to say nothing of the crowbar beatings, morphine injections, and pedobear hookups.

You can read all about the game’s decidedly un-sexy instances of full frontal nudity, unless you want to be surprised by man’s inhumanity towards man. There will be plenty dirty deeds to behold, as the BBFC rating – 18+ – reveals 5 hours and 12 minutes of cutscenes and 3 hours and 25 minutes of extra footage, covering all the branching investigation and interrogation options.

-kristen spencer

Anonymous suspends attack, Sony admits to attack in the first place

The day after Anonymous promised to wage war against Sony in response to the company’s legal actions against fellow hackers Geohot and Graf_Chokolo, the PlayStation Network went down. And stayed down. Sony claimed “sporadic maintenance,” even after Anonymous took credit for taking down the service, and several Sony websites, in an interview with PlayStation LifeStyle. Well, looks like Sony’s ready to concede that maybe, just maybe, they’re not the ones tinkering under the hood.

Sony admitted today that it is “currently investigating [the network instability], including the possibility of targeted behavior of an outside party,” a company representative told GameSpot. “If this is indeed caused by such act, we want to once again thank our customers who have borne the brunt of the attack through interrupted service. Our engineers are working to restore and maintain the services, and we appreciate our customers’ continued support.”

Though they haven’t stopped gathering family records and personal details on Sony employees, Anonymous have ceased their denial-of-service attack on the PlayStation Network. “We realize that targeting the PSN is not a good idea. We have therefore temporarily suspended our action, until a method is found that will not severely impact Sony customers,” stated the group, who previously referred to gamers as “collateral damage.”

“Anonymous is on your side, standing up for your rights. We are not aiming to attack customers of Sony. This attack is aimed solely at Sony, and we will try our best to not affect the gamers, as this would defeat the purpose of our actions. If we did inconvenience users, please know that this was not our goal.”

“That being said, our campaign against Sony and others that would trample on the idea of free information will continue, until we are satisfied with the outcome.” -kristen spencer

Brink shows off some special abilities in new gameplay video

If you can resist customizing your simian-like character long enough to get down to the business of playing, Splash Damage’s Brink will allow you unlock all sorts of special abilities. This latest gameplay video, titled “Ready and Able,” shows off some of the multiplayer mayhem that will come with leveling up your persistent character, including the ability to hack enemy turrets, chuck Molotov cocktails and sticky bombs, and resurrect yourself with an injection administered Pulp Fiction-style.

And yes, okay, it also shows off some of the nifty hats you get to wear.

[TVGB]

-kristen spencer

PopCap launches new small games label, 4th and Battery

PopCap have announced the formation of a new small games label, 4th & Battery. Named after the cross streets of the game maker’s Seattle headquarters, the studio within a studio will act, according to Executive Vice President Ed Allard, as “a pressure valve intended to keep [their] heads from exploding.”

“The PopCap brand has become closely associated with ultra-high quality, polish and attention to detail – which is a great thing. But our standard game development process is therefore long and involved, and doesn’t really accommodate all of the creativity pumping through our collective veins,” said Allard. “4th & Battery gives us a way to quickly try really strange or marginal ideas, and to give our designers a safe area to hone their chops.”

“[It's] is a purely experimental, creative label with none of the typical concerns like schedules, profitability, or even target audience. It’s kind of the video game equivalent of B-sides or short films,” added PopCap co-founder Jason Kapalka. “Expect weirdness.”

Weird is one way to describe their first release, Unpleasant Horse, a game about a “strikingly unpleasant” winged horse that enjoys killing small birds and forcing all the happier horses down into a “perpetual meat grinder” to earn extra points and special bonuses. The meat grinder doesn’t play favorites, so you’ll have to keep bouncing on clouds, birds and the more pleasant horses to prevent your much deserved demise. Sounds screwed? Try fabulous. Look for the free iPhone and iPod Touch game in the App Store later this month.

-kristen spencer

Latest Pocket God update chock full of Charlie Sheen-isms

Pocket God gets a transfusion of tiger’s blood in today’s “Two And A Half Pygmies” update, with the addition of a character named Charlie who in turn transform into a tiger and a Vatican assassin warlock.

“A mysterious stranger arrives on Oog Island and he seems a little addled,” says the official description for the iOS title’s thirty-eighth episode. “He speaks in a strange code and keeps babbling about ‘winning’. He also does other weird things like transforming into a tiger that slices other pygmies in half. Gross! What makes this pygmy so crazy? Well…he’s a total freaking rock star from Mars!”

I thought it was the fact that he never sleeps and carries around a briefcase full of coke, but maybe I’m thinking of a different Pygmy.

-kristen spencer

Superbrothers: Sword and Sworcery EP soundtrack available in vinyl and digital

Superbrothers: Sword & Sworcery EP, the iPad point and click sensation, wouldn’t be the success it is without the haunting, hypnotic score of Jim Gunthrie, now available as Jim Gunthrie’s Sword & Sworcery LP: The Ballad of the Space Babies. This means I can enjoy the Toronto-based artist’s sonorous stylings without exposing myself to the temptation of tweeting every line of dialogue. Apologies to my Twitter followers.

You can grab a digital copy of the 27-track album at iTunes (currently Canada only) for $8.99 or at Jim Guthrie’s Bandcamp for $7.99. In addition to being a buck cheaper, buying straight from the artist allows you to choose “about any [music] format you could possibly desire.” For $30, you could be the proud owner of a 12″ vinyl copy, which features an embossed jacket by Craig “Superbrothers” Adams, a limited edition art print by Cory Schmitz, and the digital copy.

Meanwhile, the iPhone version of the Superbrothers: Sword & Sworcery EP is still on track for release sometime in late April.

-kristen spencer

Hacker group Anonymous sets sights on Sony

Sony’s handling of the case against PS3 hacker George “GeoHot” Hotz has attracted the attention of “hactivist” group Anonymous, who have previously targeted Gawker, Amazon, Mastercard and the whole of Scientology.

“Congratulations, Sony. You have now received the undivided attention of Anonymous,” reads the statement on the group’s website. “Your recent legal action against our fellow hackers, GeoHot and Graf_Chokolo, has not only alarmed us, it has been deemed wholly unforgivable.”

“You have abused the judicial system in an attempt to censor information on how your products work. You have victimized your customers merely for possessing and sharing information, and continue to target every person who seeks this information. This is the information they were willing to teach to the world for free. The very same information which you wish to suppress for the sake of corporate greed and the complete control of users.”

According to the group, Sony has committed an “offense against free speech and internet freedom” by “deny[ing] consumers the right to use products they have paid for, and rightfully own, in the manner of their choosing,” essentially “renting [their] products.” They stuck their penises in the hornets nest, as the press release so eloquently states. Now they will learn they’ve only been “renting [their] web domains,” implying open season on any and all Sony-branded websites.

A splinter group of former Anonymous members, calling themselves Backtrace Security, broke off last month in lieu of the increasing illegality of Anonymous’ activities and is threatening to release personal details of its members, who they claim have become “a vigilante group,” “a mob without conscience” and “arrogant sociopaths.”

-kristen spencer

#sony #anonymous #operation payback #george hotz #geohot #ps3 hack case

F.E.A.R. 3 story trailer, making you feel so much better about Thankgiving with your family

The familial dysfunction in this story trailer for F.E.A.R. 3 makes Oedipus look like the poster-boy for healthy mother-son relationships.

In F.E.A.R. 3, pregnant paranormal powerhouse Alma and her two sons, Point Man and the seemingly resurrected Paxton Fettel, look to be heading toward a horrifying family reunion. The trailer's pretty light on details. But Warner Bros. Interactive's frightfully Ring-esque series has always been better at conveying mood than plot, which only makes if you read the Wiki. Still, with 30 Days of Night's Steve Niles and Halloween's John Carpenter writing the story for this second sequel, it might dig deeper than "creepy girl with psychic powers."

-kristen spencer

L.A. Noire goes to the Tribeca Film Fest

Rockstar Games' L.A. Noire is the first video game to be named an official selection of the Tribeca Film Festival. The world-renowned film fest, co-founded in 2002 by Robert DeNiro, will feature a live interactive screening of a case from L.A. Noire, which Tribeca's Geoff Gilmore describes as "a new realm of storytelling that is part cinema, part gaming, and a whole new realm of narrative expression, interactivity, and immersion." It will be followed by a Q&A exploring the crossover between filmmaking and interactive...wait, does that say "enteratainment?"

For future reference, Adobe Illustrator's spell check is tucked away under the edit menu.

-kristen spencer

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