Manifestations: The Wheel of Psychosis, Alternate Worlds and Monsoon.
It took three weeks to get the crazy buzz I had last night that took me into another dimension. Three weeks of staying up four nights a week taking amphetamines and doing nothing but playing Metal Gear Rising. I was planning on writing more on my horror, but what I managed to create in the depths of my own mind was far better than any fiction. Some of it seemed really hard to believe but I remember it clearly more vividly than any of my day to day stuff.
I only had myself to blame for the manifestation i created.
Monsoon, a cyborg ninja with no eyes and detachable body parts who scurried around like a vermin, raping me of all my health, had been the object of my frustration for a while and I had nobody to vent to.
To make matters worse, I played his theme tune over and over again; it was an awesome song. Day three of insane gaming and we had just bought a fresh batch of Phet. That with two nights without sleeping was enough to get us off our rocker. In that time we’d done nothing but play and talk about Metal Gear, planting lots of seeds for the ultimate psychosis that was to come.
The phet was stronger than normal but I thought nothing of it as we got stuck into the DLC we just bought. We were being our normal, obscene feral selves talking about watersports, enemas and ideas for my story, which I soon abandoned as the amazing phet kicked in. I knew it was going to be ‘one of those nights’ when I saw a chicken that had been on the TV walking across the ceiling. When I blinked it was gone, but I had definitely seen it. Sleep deprivation and good base made for great hallucinations.
Some of the Metal Gear characters began to filter into my weird reality. I felt almost certain that one of them was in the kitchen. My partner was too engrossed in fiddling with the settings on his phone to notice.
It was about 1am when we heard a loud crash, which sounded like someone banging on the window. It was the rats, I told myself as we were on the second-floor balcony and the cage was right by the window. We never found out for certain what it was, but it was the noise that changed everything.
“Have a look if there’s someone out there,” he said.
I pulled the curtains back and there he was clear as day. A fucking Monsoon scurrying back and forth on the balcony. Not like an off it ‘I just caught something out of the corner of my eye.’ It was Monsoon as clear as day, down to every last detail to what he looked like to the way he was scurrying. From then on, the other half sat on the settee faffing on his fucking phone, which I hate. I could not stop thinking of Monsoon, even an hour later he was still running around out there. Somehow he found his way inside and stayed behind the rat cage. Cheeky fuck never once looked me in the face or said anything but he was always there. I wanted him to go. He was too vivid and I couldn’t think of anything else. All I could say was ‘Meme’ (one of his quotes off the game) like I was in a stupor.
I figured if I had the laptop I could distract myself and make him go.
“I need the laptop, Monsoon said he wants it. I’ll stop saying Meme then.”
All I got was a scowl and ‘No.’
I realised that this was off it talk. I’d let my guard down by mentioning Monsoon as if he was really there. It seemed like ages until he finally passed the laptop on. To my horror there were about 4 tabs open and on everyone was a big picture of the Fucker with a smug smirk on his face. The laptop was a no-go zone too. That fucking picture would burn its way into my mind. My basic instinct told me to keep this shit to myself, nobody would believe me.
The next thing I remember clearly was being someplace else. I just wish I could remember how I got there.
I was in the game, the arena where Monsoon appears and you have to fight him. Rather than describe it, its easier to just post a pic.
Replace Raiden with an off it fucker and you should have some idea of where I was.
It was as vivid and clear as the living room I was in! Monsoon was stuck on the wall doing one of his moves. Next thing I knew he had launched this huge wheel towards me, that was so powerful it was tearing up the floor. It was similar to the one in the game but slightly different:
This wheel amused me no end and ‘wheel’ was added to my limited vocabulary of ‘meme’ and ‘hehehehee’.Unlike being in the game, the wheel skimmed around me like he wasn’t aiming for me. Or maybe he’d been taking phet for days too and couldn’t aim straight. Either way the Wheel of Psychosis came roaring past me and I turned around to look behind me to see where it went. In the split second it took me to turn around it had transformed into a Unicycle and Monsoon was standing on top of it doing some kind of weird tapdance. This was a move he’d been saving for me, Raiden never got to see this… WTF!!!
He was throwing something around too, money bags full of white powder. But somehow I knew it was PEROXIDE, not any kind of illicit substance. Bag swapping was ringing in my head. I didn’t know if he had swapped the bags or if someone else was involved. Then he leapt back onto the wall, summoning his wheel again and this scenario repeated over and over and over again.
I fucking loved it. I was inside a video game level with a killer cyborg ninja in a HELMET watching him throw wheels and dance on a unicycle. I knew he meant me no harm but still I remember literally trying to dodge this wheel.
Three hours after my last clear memory I started coming back into my own flat. I wondered what Monsoon’s agenda was. Why was he flinging bags of peroxide bleach around and what was that on his head??? At least I couldn’t see him anymore. My mind was totally blown.
It was not a hallucination: it was a Reality.
I had to document this. My first discovery of Psychosis.I will never tell anyone in my reality, they will think I am crazy.I finally plucked up the courage to tell my other half because he was off it too. He took some convincing and when I convinced him he said, “What was you doing with him then, fucking him was you?”
That was the last thing on my mind, but thanks for planting that seed. I feared I was boring him with my waffle. I wish he could have been there.
I turned to my blog. On Tumblr I can remain anonymous. I’ve been searching for what the meaning behind all this was and I apologise to whoever I bore along the way.
There are other worlds out there and I’ll always be grateful to Monsoon for showing me! My mind is open if he ever wants to come back. And I’d love to know if anyone else has experienced what I have.
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