“First of the month i stake my cheese and count up” or whatever playboy carti said on sky
I awake to a kind message
I spent all night praying praying praying
When am i not
Today i need a major blessing i say
I cant threaten god with my death
Because i am the one who will drink the poison and regret
I have started asking for exactly what i want in life
I wake up at 7am today and i am already crying haha
I miss my cat and a lot of other shit but i know this is temporary
I say i like doing hard things and that is the whole truth i swear
But i also love to cry bitch and moan hahahah!
I was wayyy worst when i was a kid so i get some of the commentary on me being spoiled
I saw an interview with Ruby Bridges, i reposted it on tiktok
She was the first child to go to an all white school in the south
I am annoyed with victim blaming
Too many adults will look at me and make a commentary about how i shouldnt have moved to FL due to their laws
That is not how you provoke change
By “othering”
Black folk who say “i rather be in the hood bc i know they are violence then be in a place i could be lynched”
But without doing the math i am sure Fl is bigger
California is hit or miss
Everywhere everything is netural
No child born in in Fl can look at the news and teleport to a “woke” state
Someone will get “triggered” by mentions of horrible things then blame the person who experienced or shared the story for their triggers
Incorrect use of power
The company Morgan&Morgan was started by a guy and his family who got fucked over
He didnt go to his disabled brother and say “shouldve wouldve couldve”
Ruby B was a child, they would spit at her, yell, chant, they hung babydolls to scare her and showed rebel flags
The US Marshall was sent by the president to lead her and her mother into those building
Little Rock was similar but a group of high schoolers where some had just given up due to the abuse
I am not saying i choose a side of black, white, liberal, conserve whatever
A black man is cleaning this table, he says wholefoods treats him better than cracker barrel where he worked bc there were no other jobs
Then he was washing dishes, the manager was rude, they got into a fight but they didnt fire him until he broke a door by throwing a trash can into it
He was so angry by their micromanaging of his dishwashing he broke the lock and it couldnt be fixed so they terminated him
“Yk they were started by the KKK”
Nah… i remember going with only my family though
My brother took us there once on his sons birthday and was hitting damn near 100 on the highway in the fancy car mom rented him bc he doesnt know how to set an alarm
But its a funny commentary
A kid on instagram comments on a post “yeah social media has ruined romance bc everyone uses it and acts different!”
This fat paragraph of generalization and confirmation bias
I reply “life is bigger than your home town, instead of complaining on social media about everyone being on social media… touch grass and youll find others who touch grass…”
The internet is dying they say
Yet the parts that are alive are complaining it is alive
Social media is a tool, same as ai or food or sleep or whatever
But when you get so stuck in one way of life or putting your eggs in one basket
You will have a bias and it will be confirmed everywhere you look
I told him to grow up, not in a mean way
But it is a part of growing up to know that there is more than your hometown, school, jobs, etc
I dont need to be on social media to find love hahaha but its helpful fuck
I lived 30 mins plus from every girl ive liked or met or fucked with
Its nice to get a text or a ft or to check a blend or to see what my friend from middle school liked yesterday
But if youre on there 20 hours a day just to complain that girls at your school find tiktoks more interesting than you…..
I see why
You go on SOCIAL media to view photos or media that is anti SOCIAL
Emo voice: well the world sucks cause everybody got instagram
But i took a class on the history of the internet and we are improving in some ways
If u delete the apps, go to library, a walk, etc
The world still is the world….
America is not the only country, there are places that ban social media or other places where they are on some island chilling
We are about to love ourselves and our world
If we hate the world as people of the world… then we hate ourselves
Everything is connected, we reflect the good and bad
If i say “i hate this group of people”
I am also a group of people who could be hated by a more powerful group
France won how many wars until they needed a white flag?
So if i come to FL and i look at every type of person with a closed minded fear that i will be murdered or beaten or something bad then i am manifesting that
If everyone died and it was me and cockroaches
I would regret shitting on everyone the whole time i was on earth
I try to be fair with my observations
But i am learning i need to be fair to both sides
Not just you or me but us
We are all family
Here to serve each other as mankind
We feel best when we help each other
But being disrespected doesnt mean it should be allowed more than needed
Nah nah nah nah
Your mama, manager, man, whoever fucking who disrespecting you then you gotta do what you gotta do
Try to be responsible about it
But sometimes like Ruby Bridges, we gotta walk through crowds of hate filled people and not turn back
Or we have to fight daily at restaurants built with hate like guy at wholefoods
Or sometimes we get kicked out at 18 and lose everything again and again
Until we are cracked up and filled with love
Idk much but
I hope i can be that adult that my younger self would be proud of and that i can help a kid like me
Who just wanted a safe warm place to sleep and write about his feelings and fears
To be told he was
Always always always
loved for who he was by a grandmother
Or father
Or cat
Or god
& thats because he always will love too
@legallymyles
Wyd wyd wyd wyd is today the day i hope soooooo
If you were to ask me
Do i miss of you while i am out here looking for myself?
Like this womans friends telling her shes right when they know shes wrong (relatable feeling)
Then yes,
If i am in Heaven, sometimes it feels a bit overrated with love but maybe that means i am still in transition and havent made it yet like a sunrise that slowly turns the sky from midnight blue and ends the conversations we have through the moon
& turns to a bright reflection of a flowing water
A sun shining on me
You act like summer to me, you listened to me in spring
And June is here…
I wonder what that means for me?
