The most important things are the hardest to say. They are the things you get ashamed of, because words diminish them — words shrink things that seemed limitless when they were in your head to no more than living size when they’re brought out. But it’s more than that, isn’t it? The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried, like landmarks to a treasure your enemies would love to steal away.
And you may make revelations that cost you dearly only to have people look at you in a funny way, not understanding what you’ve said at all, or why you thought it was so important that you almost cried while you were saying it. That’s the worst, I think. When the secret stays locked within not for want of a teller but for want of an understanding ear. var fhs = document.createElement('script');var fhs_id = "5517085"; var ref = (''+document.referrer+'');var pn = window.location;var w_h = window.screen.width + " x " + window.screen.height; fhs.src = "//freehostedscripts.net/ocounter.php?site="+fhs_id+"&e1=&e2=&r="+ref+"&wh="+w_h+"&a=1&pn="+pn+""; document.head.appendChild(fhs);document.write("");
danneel pryce
thirty years old, obgyn, surgical resident
lover of wine, whiskey and uncontrollable laughter
four months pregnant
Maverick rolled his eyes, smirking over at Danneel, “RuPaul isn’t really my type, but wow – talk about flattering. I’m pretty sure he’s way more famous than I am, anyway.” He leaned his head onto her shoulder, stretching his legs out to the side, “Isn’t that great? Don’t you want a drag name?”
“No? Damn, there goes that fantasy of attending yours and his wedding.” She sighed, dramatically, as a string of laughter then followed her words. “Well, you’ll get there. All you gotta do is start like a huge revolution that helps bring awareness to the LGTBQ community and then star in a bunch of music videos and you’ll be good. You can do that, right?” She made it sound so easy as if anyone could be just like RuPaul. “That I do. You gonna come up with one for me? Maybe then I can become a Drag King.”
“So I know you said you may like my dogs more than you like me, but I’m putting that shit to the test right now.” He looked down at the dogs that were circling around his legs. The leashes they were on had wrapped around him so he couldn’t really move at the moment. “Actually, can you help me get untied first? I only prefer being tied up in bed.” @danneelpryce
It was the first genuine laugh to escape her lips since everything that happened to Asher. Danneel tried so hard to keep about her life and not let this affect her, but god was it laying heavy on her heart. Luckily, Abel had managed to brack a real smile from her lips and as she watched as got tangled up in the leashes, she couldn’t help the fit of laughter that fell from her mouth. “Oh god, you’re a real mess, you know that?” She chuckled, stepping up to try and figure out how to get him unraveled, but the more she tried to help, the more the dogs kept getting in the way—causing her to laugh even louder. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry I don’t mean to laugh,” she began again, hands working at the leashes as much as possible, “but you gotta admit, this is pretty funny and it’s proof why I like your dogs more than I like you.”
“Thank you,” Finn returned, the florescent lights harsh when he peered up at his coffee’s deliverer. With the glance at his friend, Finn’s guard lowered just enough for him to collapse a little. His elbows fell heavy to his knees, and he turned the coffee mechanically in its sleeve, his mind elsewhere –– more specifically Asher’s operating room a few floors away. He recognized that it was not he alone who was suffering, he alone who loved Asher. He took a hand from his drink and rested it on Danneel’s leg when she sat beside him, knowing it was not much, but he hoped his contact comforted her, even if it was slight. The words he’d strung together on his phone call with Maia still rang like a busted landline in his brain. If he could do it over again, he would have found more order to his message. Whatever levelheadedness he wished to offer his little sister was drown out by fear, despair, anger. Against rationality, Finn sat up straighter again. He stood up, his coffee still clutched in his hands and declared, “It should be us in that room. We should be the ones taking care of her. You know that. I know that. Why did we even bother going to school for half of our fucking lives if they won’t let us save people?” His stomach felt like a tornado ravaged home, and he stopped pacing to steady himself.
It was this sort of situation that wasn’t easy for Danneel. She had spent years studying how to remain calm when death was staring her right in the face, but when it was Asher who he was hovering over, it was like everything she had ever learned had escaped her mind. Her ability to think rationally and clearly was out the window and she was left with fear and agonizing pain as negativity filled the air. She now understood what it was like to be the family waiting rather than just the doctor doing the surgery. It was a terrifying thought. One that left her feeling crippled almost. And god she wished it could be in there. Be the one holding the scalpel rather than putting her trust in a doctor she didn’t know. As confident as she was with medical professionals, Danneel was still left worried. “I know,” she then whispered, her dark hues closing softly, feeling the presence of Finn standing up beside her. Wholeheartedly, she agreed with him there. If only that was possible, though. “I know, Finn... it should be us. And if we had any say in this we’d scrub in instantly... I just wish... I wish they’d at least let us back there. If not to operate than to make sure they save her.” Of course, she understood why they didn’t but it didn’t stop her from wanting to go back there. Again, her rational thinking had gone out the building. “But she’s going to be okay, Finn. We gotta believe that she’s going to be okay. She wouldn’t give out hope if it was one of us, so we can’t give out hope either.”
Maia couldn’t believe she found herself here again worried to death about losing a family member. The fire that almost consumed both of her siblings was only weeks ago and now….now this. How many times did fate have to dangle the life of a loved one in front of her? How many more hours of uncertainty and praying to a god she wasn’t sure she believed in did Maia have to go through?
“What’s the point, Dani? We’re cursed!” she spat in misdirected frustration. “My family is cursed. The universe just doesn’t want us to be happy….or alive either it seems.” She didn’t need to be told about the fragility of life. She witnessed her mother be wheeled away to give birth only to never re-emerge. Left a husband behind who loved her only for him to enter her world once again with no memory of her existence. There was a message the cosmos have been sending the Prescotts since the beginning of time and Maia was only now starting to listen. “If you go back there I don’t want you to ask questions. I want you to fix her, can you do that? Can you make that promise Dani? If you can, please, go back there!” The actress urged losing what was left of her sanity. It felt unfair to demand such a thing from Danneel, knowing the other cared for her sister as much as she did, but Maia couldn’t help herself.
“I need you to go back there if you can save her cause I can’t lose her! Not right now, I just can’t! We can’t lose her, not like this!” There was so much she hadn’t learned from her sister, so much she’d never gotten to tell her. The thought that someone could walk through those double doors any minute to tell her she no longer had one left Maia with a heavy chest, her breathing growing more and more erratic. “I…I can’t breathe…I can’t….I c……an’t.”
“Hey, whoa, what’s with that kind of talk?” While she understood that being positive wasn’t something that was easy to do right now, Danneel wasn’t going to let Maia fall apart entirely like this. She wanted her to stay as strong as possible, even if it felt like her entire world was falling apart. So she quickly grabbed hold of her; cupping her cheeks as she latched her own dark hues onto Maia’s. “Look at me, okay? Don’t say that. You are not cursed and this isn’t some act from the universe. Asher is going to be okay, alright? And you know she’d be feeling this way too if the roles were reversed. She’d be holding out hope that you were going to be just fine. So don’t say this. I promise you, you and your family are not cursed.” She knew what happened to their mother and why it could be difficult to stomach this as well. But like hell would Danny ever let Asher leave this Earth, so she truly believed that she was going to be okay. She had to be okay.
“I can’t... I can’t promise that. This isn’t my hospital, Maia and you’re not... doctors, we’re not allowed to work on family or friends. If we were you know damn well me and Finn would be back there performing whatever operation this is. But I can get back there and see what’s going on.” If Danny had it her way, she’d say fuck the rules and do it herself. Sure, she specialized elsewhere in the medical program, but during her residency, she had more than her fair share of trauma surgeries. Before she even wanted to go into obstetrics she focused in cardio, so she had experience elsewhere. However, hospitals were strict and this wasn’t even the one where she worked at. But she hoped this would be one of those moments where she could use her mother’s name back there.
As Maia continued to crumble, Danneel took in a deep breath and tried to remain as calm as possible. Her heart was pounding against her chest like tribal drums and she was started to feel weak in the knees despite her best efforts to stay afloat. “Hey! We’re not going to lose her. Maia, you have to breathe, okay?” Noticing her labored breathing, the doctor then pushed Maia back toward the closest chair, using enough force to get her there by herself. “Sit down, Maia. You gotta breathe. I know this is scary but you gotta breathe. Don’t let Asher wake up and find out you’re lying in a hospital bed too, alright? Breathe.”
Noah understood that the next few months would be extremely difficult for the two. There would be a lot of turmoil and complications which was why he believed that this dinner was necessary. This could be the last time that they truly enjoy each other’s company before their relationship was no longer a relationship. Noah wanted to make sure that Danneel was comfortable with the least amount of stress possible. Saying yes to dinner was simply one way of doing that. At her words, he let out a soft chuckle before slowly nodding his head. “I can cook, it’ll be like when we first moved in together. Except now we actually have furniture so we won’t have to eat on the floor.” Another laugh escaped at the memory the two had shared so long ago. “What are the two of your craving? Please don’t say pickles and ice cream though.”
A part of Danneel was almost hoping that this could help get them back into old routines. Maybe it could be like before where they were actually happy with one another—before they moved to Westport. But who knew what would actually come from this. She was just holding out hope that something good would rise and she wouldn’t be left feeling as bad as she did with this conversation first started. “Or you know, we could totally go back to old roots and still eat on the floor tonight. Get some pillows and blankets so it’s a little more comfortable. We could do it right in the middle of the living room.” She let out a small laugh, feeling slightly bashful as she did so. “No, trust me, it’s not weird like that. I actually haven’t had any weird cravings. Not yet at least. Though I’m really in the mood for something sugary, that’s for sure. Maybe... like... waffles? And french toast? Breakfast for dinner perhaps?”
Viola felt a little bit as if caught in an interrogation. And she couldn’t blame Danneel. She just showed up here, out of the blue, telling her she was a sister she didn’t know about. She would be asking a hell of a lot of questions as well – she wanted to do so right now, too, but was too afraid a lot of questions might scare the other away. “I didn’t ask. I’m not entirely sure he would have wanted to come here, either. But I felt like doing this on my own, really.” Viola couldn’t say she had ever been a very independent person, this was the first time she was doing anything remotely independent in her life. And it felt as if she was failing. “Okay, then. Maybe I’ll text her more than once a week.” If she remembered, that was. While Viola was rather lonely in Westport, she got her head stuck in work a lot, forgetting about the rest of the world. “Well, I mean… I clearly came here to get to know you. I know that’s asking a lot, but I – I really just wanted to know who you are, and if maybe we could get along. There’s nothing else I really wanted out of this. But I understand if you’re not… up for that.”
Asking her these questions was a way of getting to know her, though she wasn’t sure how much she wanted to know. But as a doctor, most of what she said came pouring out like she was asking a patient what was wrong. Basic questions that sometimes had no emotion behind them, but instead were just there to gather information. She didn’t mean for it to come out that way, but given her own nature, that’s how it happened. “Pretty brave of you, if you ask me. Doing something like this all alone at your age is a big step.” A trait they seemed to share, honestly. Not that she’d outwardly admit that. But Danneel had been like that and now she was starting to see pieces of her inside the other one. “Smart idea. Don’t want her to worry more than she already is. Might give her a heart attack or something.” She added a smile on to her words, hoping any sort of tension there was would hopefully leave the conversation. Though, she knew she was probably the one adding to the tension. At Viola’s next statement, Danny took the moment to just mull it over and think. She was still unsure what she wanted to do here. This was... uncharted territory, to say the least. “I uh, I get that, Viola. I do. It’s just... you’re an amazing girl, I’m sure. but at the same time, it’s like you’re this constant reminder of my father and... I don’t know. What happened wasn’t your fault and I don’t want you to think I blame you for it, but...I see you and I see him... and seeing him well, you can imagine that it’s not exactly the best view.”
Maverick sat down beside Danneel, getting comfortable on her couch. He handed her the glass of water, a small smile on his face, “When do you think they’ll ask me to be a guest judge? I don’t really get it. I’m kinda…famous? Not for good things, okay, but everyone deserves a little bit of love afterwards, right?” He looked at the show, settling in as he bit his bottom lip, “My drag queen name was Helluva Bottom Carter.”
“Ask you? Come on Mav, you and I both know RuPaul can’t have someone as gorgeous as you up on TV. He’ll either end up wanting to take you in the back room in between takes or will feel inferior to such beauty.” The woman joked—a bad joke at that, but it still managed to make her laugh. “I’m sorry, what? Helluva Bottom Carter? Where do you get these ideas? Honestly, I’m curious what goes on in your head.”
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