Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
occasionally subtle
taylor price
Xuebing Du
ojovivo
Sweet Seals For You, Always
cherry valley forever
★
almost home
Misplaced Lens Cap
Sade Olutola
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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tannertan36
untitled
titsay
Claire Keane
Game of Thrones Daily
The Bowery Presents
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@delicatlueur
— délicat lueur ,
delicatlueur , — is a multi - muse writing blog dependent on NEPOFM & housing ace st. clair , ‘ nia ’ arinya yontararak , elias hyun , josette seong , jun - seo “ joey ” cha & julian walsh . please do not interact if you are not a part of the same group !
this blog is penned by alicia , twenty1+ , est , she/her .
carrd
＊ 𝗢𝗣𝗘𝗡 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗘𝗥 ›› @nepofmstarters ＊ 𝗙𝗘𝗔𝗧𝗨𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 ›› lari & your muse ＊ 𝗟𝗢𝗖𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 ›› lower manhattan
“ i heard someone asking for a scooped bagel . not to be mean but i kinda wished i wasn’t leaving the shop to hear the aftermath of that . guess they didn’t see that one scooped bagel tiktok . ”
“ i know i’m always joining the hate train , but … it’s just wasteful , isn’t it ? throwing away half of the freshly baked bread you’re eating , it’s ridiculous . but like , you do you and shit , whatever . but asking for the person working the counter to do it for you ? enjoy food however you like , but fucking scoop it yourself . ”
"one of us has to take one for the team to robinhood it out to the rest of the coven, y'know?" look at them, their coven leader even has their own little errand boy, ready to swoop everything "and who am i to deny myself the right, the honor, and the glory?" they're not even dramatic for a writer; though if anything, this is a feigned arrogance as joey swoops into the rescue. her go to weed guy, candle bag carrier, heart surger. "so you're saying we're going to pull an allnighter? i think i may have the perfect glass set, playlist, and even thrifted pajama set. since we're going for the aesthetic, hmm?"
chuckles , shifting the weight of the candle bags a bit , careful not to drop any of rory’s precious loot . “ don’t even with the coven shit , ” grumbles , even as a half - smile tugs at lips . “ if i weed , wine and dine you , only to end up sacrificed in some arcane ceremony for your dark magic shit … i’m gonna haunt you so bad , witch . ” joey likes the way she rolls with it , the ease that flows between them . he’d only felt that kind of easiness … in the very beginning with larissa . it’s not like he’s mr. relationship expert or anything , but before , with all his past relationships , the lines were always so clearly defined . but with rory , it feels different . maybe , just maybe , this is ( slow - burn ) friends - to - lovers territory . with stolen glances , inside jokes , subtle flirtation … and the delicious unknown of it all . they might kiss , or joey might lean in and get playfully pushed away , but rory would be laughing , that laughter that warms his heart . and joey wouldn’t hate it . not one bit . “ when’s it not an all - nighter ? but yeah , i’m down . consider me your personal chef for the night . and just ‘cause i’m curious , what else does this aesthetic include ? should i lug my guitar along ? and am i getting a proper snuggle , or am i strictly the culinary talent and sacrificial offering ? ”
"all i'm saying is i'm not -" there's a dramatic pause, for effect, of course ; and they take out their bags filled with candles. to the brim. it'll likely break if she walks the wrong way, actually. "i'm not above a bath and bodyworks candle sale. it is what it is, a win is a win, y'know?" ( @nepofmstarters )
“ you candle - hoarding little witch . ” and naturally , joey swoops in , grabbing both bags as one threatens to topple , cradling them from the bottom and using his chest for added support . because … he’ll joke , and he’ll poke fun , but he’s still a gentleman , and he’s still hooked . so , rory gets what rory wants , and what joey thinks they might want . ( and he’s always trying to figure that out , too — what they want , if it’s him they want … ) . “ tell you what — since you're going full - on mood lighting , why don’t you set the vibe with your candles while i take care of dinner tonight , hmmm ? nothing too fancy , just beats another 4 am doordash binge when you get the fuckin’ munchies , y’know ? ”
AND SHE doesn't , can't , won't realize it : but envy is a bitter pill to swallow that lingers in the base of her throat . they're best friends , and he's best friends with LARI too , so it shouldn't be surprising , it shouldn't , and she knows , knows LOGICALLY he's only making light of the situation to defuse it , as if to say , HAHA , look how far i've come , and YET ...
there's a small bit that wishes it were her . that whatever lingering feelings he has for larissa ( because he has to --- who wouldn't ? ) was for her . and if it were simply about ATTENTION , she could easily find the validation from the many people on the dating apps she's found herself frequenting : talking , playing , flirting --- it's not short in SUPPLY . it's not hard to achieve , but it never , never comes close to the attention she NEEDS . " i'm sure all your fans that LOVE you are not shipping me with you . they all know i could do waaay better , " lulu offers , POUTING as he manages to catch the cotton candy . they'll mutter something about HUMAN vacuum cleaner , and leave it at that .
lulu will pick at the COTTON candy : nodding along or shaking their head at his WORDS , stealing glances when she's sure he's not looking . ( oh , when will you realize ? this isn't how best friends act . best friends don't feel GUILT for admiring when the other party isn't looking , guilt for the envy and JEALOUSY that crawls up your throat , or freezing when he jokingly, JOKINGLY says he'd pick you every time . how delusional are you ? chasing empty leads and red strings that have long since been cut ? you're not sure . you're not sure anymore . ) instead , they'll offer him a pointed look of DOUBT . " yeah , right . you're just saying that 'cause if i end up meeting my SOULMATE on farmersonly.com i won't let you hog the sheets on my racecar bed , " she scoffs : but eyes are downcast as she REJECTS the idea , even if bright notes in her voice say otherwise .
she elbows the other , holding out the rest of cotton candy to him . " m'done . eat the rest . AND YOU'RE saying that i'm scaring your hoes off , but you have ZERO game . zero play . there's no 'hoes' for me to scare off in the FIRST place . if anything ... you're SCARING off all my potential prince charmings on hinge and TINDER ... i should really change my profile picture to something that ISN'T a photo from us , " lulu says , at this point , thinking outloud , before offering him a look . " do you know how many guys said me having a guy best friend is a RED FLAG ? i don't even own any flags ... "
elias is over larissa .
( … but , somewhere deep down , a part of him clings to the idea of lari . clings to the familiar ache of not knowing what it would be like to be loved by them ; clings to the best friend who stuck by him through thick and thin — goofy coconut bobs , scraped knees that bled through jeans , bad report cards , awkward dinner table silences where his parents argued about him behind closed doors , his mother’s coldness , and the emptiness of his father’s absence . a thirteen - year - old boy without proper love and attention needs something to cling to .
larissa is his default setting , his most well - worn pattern , the only constant he’s ever known .
even if his heart has quietly demoted them , even as someone else takes their place , larissa macedo lingers on the pedestal his mind has built for them . it’s a cruel trick — that stupid voice in his head , insisting that they’re meant to be , that the ache of wanting them will never truly fade or end … ) .
and then , there are moments , just like this one — lulu beside him , joking , teasing , sometimes even flirting … moments where the memory of larissa macedo blurs , moments where alune kim quietly steps up onto that pedestal , taking over of his heart and mind , of everything he is . and his focus narrows completely to lulu : her laugh , the way she rolls her eyes , how she claims she’s too good for him , that she can do so much better . and elias , the silly little guy he is , just smiles . because he knows — she is right . she’s too good , she could do better , she deserves much better , but still … she chooses him . chooses to be right here . with him .
( … and he doesn’t even think to compare them — lari and lulu . elias melts whenever lulu talks , a full - on , walking heart - eyes emoji . can’t even remember larissa’s name right now . but lari ? yeah , she never chose him . not even once … ) .
“ objectively ? sure , you could do way better . i get it , my fans get it . like , there are tons of people with perfect noses who somehow don’t get socked in the face for being themselves all the time . but that’s beside the point , bff lulu ! these are my fans . they don’t expect some cheesy hallmark happily - ever - after for me , nah . they know i’d never pull that off . and even if i did , i’d mess that up in , like , two days . so , you know , they just want me to be happy . and c’mon , you make me the happiest . you put up with a lot of my crap . so , yeah , there are people who actually ship us ! i get those dms , believe me . ”
jealousy flares up inside elias .
it’s a familiar twisting in his stomach . it’s a cold knot tightening in his gut . elias is chronically jealous , but this — hearing lulu say they’re actively searching for a soulmate — feels like a punch to his chest . it physically hurts . because elias … elias found his soulmate years ago . he’s looking at them right now .
“ farmersonly.com ? dude , soulmates aren’t on some website or dating app . they’re supposed to catch you off guard , sneak up on you , you know ? pop up outta the blue . you’re not supposed to be out looking for them . they kinda just find you . and besides , ” leans back , head tilted — just enough to avoid eye contact . “ even if some farmerswhatchamacallit with more tractors than teeth sweeps you off your feet … why would i give up my spot in the racecar bed ? it’s mine as much as it’s yours . it’s really not fair , you to say this — it’s not like i’ve ever even thought about bringing some rando back to our bed . ”
there’s a flicker of satisfaction . because … a small , shameful part of him is glad to know that lulu isn’t having much luck on tinder and hinge . because of him . because he’s in most of her pictures . it shouldn’t feel good , and yet … it does . the familiar ache in his chest — the one from knowing she’s actively seeking for her soulmate when he’s right there — feels a little lighter now .
“ my god , lulu , just ditch those apps already . you think those guys are prince charming material ? your next tinder swipe has a solid 97.6% chance of owning a full - on sex dungeon setup in his mom’s basement — cage , handcuffs , whips , ropes , the whole works . and that’s not even counting the 34.5% chance he’s got a restraining order tucked under his mattress . the numbers don’t lie , bff . so , could you , just this once , trust the obviously reliable stats from the elias hyun institute of highly questionable dude - related disaster ? do it for me , will ya ? ”
“ if you’re really searching for your prince charming , your soulmate … let’s get real : he’s not on fuckin’ hinge or tinder . he’s out there , living his life , sneaking up on you when you least expect it . who the fuck knows , maybe he’s been there all along , hiding in plain sight as that charming , so damn sexy , funny best friend of yours . you know , the one with questionable hair days , slightly crooked nose and a sweet tooth for your cotton candy ? could be him . who knows , really . ”
and a smile spreads across lips — that silly , sickly - sweet smile reserved only for lulu . “ go on , give it a try . i mean , i’ve always figured i’m your soulmate , even if you don’t think the same . all we gotta do is find out if i’m prince charming material . a kiss for your frog prince — see if i don't transform right here . ” and leans closer , a pout curving lips in mock - expectation .
“ oh my god dude , cut the shit . ” jaw clenches as they wait for him to open the door . as the door creaks open , lari barrels in before elias can change his mind and shut the door on her . is it aggressive ? maybe a little . but they’re at their wit’s end . she turns to shut the door before whipping her head around to fast him . “ what do i need ? ” they’re tired . exhausted . elias’ obsession with their dating life has become too much . not even a simple looking out for a friend will do anymore . because what he did ? definitely not in the interest of looking out for her . and lari wonders why they continue to allow his behavior to slide .
“ i need you to stop acting like a child . i need you to stay out of my dating life . i need you to get help . who i date is NONE of your business , elias . mona told me about her altercation with you . ” a mixture of anger and pride surged through them when mona retold the incident . anger towards elias . and pride towards mona for being able to hold her own . “ seriously ? you called her a gold digger ? ” they stand in front of him , arms folding across their chest like a parent waiting for a child’s explanation . “ what’s your damage ? and don’t say that you did it because you’re looking out for me . ”
okay , maybe elias flinched again . maybe he took three steps away from larissa . but to be fair , she’s acting really scary right now . and … with this three - step distance between them , kind of freed him to roll his eyes as she lay into him . and yeah , there was a flicker of something there - guilt ? embarrassment ? it’s hard to tell with elias ; it always is . because it didn’t last long . because right now ? right now , that familiar stubbornness of his flares up . right now , he feels justified . after all , his intentions were pure — protect lari , make sure this mona person wasn’t chasing them for the money or fame . and … alright , yeah , maybe a tiny , pathetic part of him will always think he’s the best option for lari . but he shoved that part way down when he realized it’d never happen , when he moved on . “ hey , hey , jesus , can you ease up ? i only called her a gold digger because i care about you , you know , ” says , with a dismissive flick of his wrist , as if that fixes anything . “ listen , i can’t help it if i’ve got a nose for sniffing out trouble when it comes to your love life . ”
“ wait a minute . what’s my damage ? jesus christ . you always paint me as this bad guy , always and forever , when i’m just — i’m trying here . i want what’s best for you . you deserve the best . and that girlie isn’t fucking it , ” protests , and his voice starts to climb , hitting that grating whine lari knows all too well , that they could recognize in their sleep . “ okay , yeah , maybe i didn’t go about it the right way . maybe i don’t know how to be the picture of a supportive bestie when you’re about to dive headfirst into another dating disaster . what , am i supposed to smile ? to cheerlead for something i know is gonna blow up in your face ? and i know , i fucking know , it was too much or whatever . i called what’s - her - face a gold digger . what do you want me to say ? you don’t have the best track record when it comes to guys . or girls . or … listen , i don’t wanna relive those questionable choices right now . ”
elias actually shuts up . for once . turns out lari’s death stare is more effective than duct tape . this is going great , a complete dumpster fire . “ alright , fine . should’ve kept my big mouth shut , probably . just … let me have it already . yell at me , lecture me , tell me i’m the worst , do your thing . hell , punch me if you need to . just get it out of your system already so i can go back to my wii tennis and you can head back to your friends who probably think i’m obsessed with you , all because i want what’s fucking best for you . ”
" 'lias isn't always wrong , 'nd he's harmless , enough , " lulu will utter hotly ; defending him , even when INEBRIATED , " he just yaps a lot , but that's 'cause ... my mom said people only do that when people don't really listen to them when it matters . and if it hits people where it hurts , " alune shrugs , picking at the COTTON candy awkwardly , " doesn't that say more about how they react than him actually stating the TRUTH ? " and she's just babbling , because she's drank a little too MUCH , gaze downcast , throwing some of the cotton candy onto the boardwalk . " everyone in this city needs therapy , not just him , " petulant response to come , " but what am i supposed to --- supposed to DO ? supposed to tell him ? he hardly --- " she swallows , and unsure if the warmth in her cheeks and flowing through her blood is due to the ALCOHOL or something else , " listens to ME , let alone reason . i wish he wouldn't get into these situations but --- " eyes are watering , looking to him , " what am i supposed to do ? "
finding the right words here is … hard . joey’s got this soft spot for lulu , and it’s tough seeing them like this — caught between loyalty and helplessness . standing by their best friend or doing what’s right … it gets to him . and he’s worried , really worried , that she’s letting herself get caught in the crossfire . “ listen , lu , i wish i had some kinda magic advice , something to fix it all . but some people … they just gotta crash and burn on their own before they get it . it sucks , i know it sucks . you’re his best friend , you want to help , you want to steer him right , but it isn’t your job to fix him . you can’t light yourself on fire just to keep someone you love warm , you know ? ” a hand reaches out , settling on their shoulder with a light squeeze . he wonders if he could just hug them , give them the kind of comfort elias should be giving right now . but elias … damn , he’s oblivious to what’s happening in front of him . joey should talk to him , should try to get through to him . tell him what’s up , tell him to get his act together before the one person who’s ALWAYS been there for him , through everything , gets hurt . because , yeah , elias has lari , benny , mimi — but he’s come close to losing each of them at some point or another . never lulu , though . lulu’s always been the one constant , the one there for him no matter how much shit he gets into . how could elias be so blind ? “ all i’m saying is … you gotta take care of yourself too , you know ? his shit is messing you up , lu . bad . you never used to be the mopey drunk type . remember threatening to punch me ? ‘ mr. jerkface mcjackass ’ ? fuck , i kinda miss that a little bit . this isn’t you . ” hand slides on her arm , settling into a side hug - a bit awkward and clumsy , but with just enough pressure to steady her drunk balance if necessary , just enough pressure to offer some small measure of comfort . “ for real , you wouldn’t stand a chance against me in a fight right now . ”
" okay, yeah, " laurie nodded, eyebrows raising as a playful yet mischievous grin flickered onto his lips. rory would probably shove a knife through his chest ( repeatedly ) if she knew he was doing this — but whatever ! if rory wasn't going to let them have this*, then it was up to laurie to fight on both their behalves ! " right away, i'm just going to let you in on a little secret : you're way overthinking them. rory isn't that deep, she isn't that serious. so . . . chill out, first of all, " laurie started. his tone was a little too confident, attitude all high and mighty as if he knew rory better than herself. " second, she's just scared 'cause she watched some stupid show where a girl fell in love with her weed guy and, like, died or something. so, yeah. that's dumb and unrealistic. " he shrugged. " anyway, i think you should totally date her. "
joey won't question this lucky break , no . after weeks of struggling to understand rory , he’s finally making progress . but it does seem a little counterintuitive , doesn't it ? laurie , one of lari’s best friends . is actively helping joey , lari’s ex - boyfriend . pursue rory — the only thing they really have in common . but hey , joey will take it and try not to overthink it . lari is moving on — or at least , as far as joey knows , they have . they’re happy with mona ; he’s seen it , and his heart ached at the damn sight . isn’t it about time he found some happiness too ? “ alright , dr. love , i could be . but in my defense , they pretty much friendzoned me . actually , i’m not even sure … i kinda laid it out there , you know ? told them how i felt . and they just sidestepped it . pretended i never said anything . ” but after ‘ fell in love with her weed guy ’ , everything else laurie said faded into the background for joey . all he heard was that rory was in love with him . rory , in love with her weed guy … him ? rory in love with him . “ she’s in love with me ? ”
“ you look familiar … weren’t you that dude in line for the $80 avocado toast place ? respect . ” // @frivclous
“ you’ve got that ‘ i see right through you ’ vibe . so i got to know , what’s the verdict on me … total clown , or just mostly ? ” // @dchlias
“ okay , let’s just get this out in the open . assumptions were made , some … not - so - nice things were said , very bad things were thought . called you a gold digger , said you were using lari for free jet rides , called you a fake , cursed you , went full csi : wiki - how edition trying to figure out how to dispose of a dead body … all that . clearly , there’s something i’m missing here . so how about i buy you a drink and you tell me where i got all these “ unfair ” ideas about you ? ” // @rainforum
“ absolutely not . if that were the case , i’d have chosen to study something like global affairs . ” she’ll wrinkle her nose up in distaste . maybe things would’ve been different had her parents shown any interest in her schooling . “ years of dealing with the press gets you to internalize everything , don’t you know ? ” words are said in jest . but it’s true . even more so whenever her brother dominates the headlines . lips purse up in thought at nia’s suggestion . “ i’ll do it on one condition , no cocktails that make you forget what a dictionary is . i don’t want to risk waking up with a hangover . ” besides , getting blackout drunk is more of her brother’s thing !
a snort escapes lips , halfway between laughter and disgust . “ global affairs ? those stuffy politicians with their never - ending speeches ? yeah , if that’s not a preview of hell , i don’t know what is . honestly , i think even the demons would take pity and be like , ‘ okay , this is too much ’ , and offer up a tax law seminar for a change of pace . so , yeah … at least with grants , you know the boredom will eventually end . ” nods , because nia gets it ! they internalize too much , and too often , but … they’re not good at keeping it in . it just builds and builds , and then it lashes out . “ boo , no fun ! but fine , fine . how about … one cocktail and two tequila shots ? you need a little something to loosen up those thesis - tense shoulders . i promise it won’t erase your grant - writing genius . you might even remember a few big words , look super sexy - smart and charm clueless guys into buying us drinks . ”
AND TRULY , he's not sure exactly what he did to warrant this , but the irritation surging through him doesn't seem to STOP , rubbing at his TEMPLES as he listens to nia ... yap . he doesn't get paid enough for this . " i think the constant discomfort is you harrassing me for zero reason , but please , continue with your DELUSIONS . i'm sure the right person will pick you some day , " eight says with a SNORT , rolling his eyes , " i don't know what your DAMAGE is , truly , and i'm probably wasting my time ASKING you , but ... why ? i barely knew who you were a couple of weeks ago , and suddenly i'm public enemy number one ? " he pauses , almost contemplative , offering her a look that almost looks like he's studying her , " actually , have you considered therapy ? i know some great therapists in the HOSPITAL that can help you with ... " motions to nia , like she's some kind of abomination , " whatever you clearly seem to be NOT dealing with . "
wicked grin unfurls across lips — wide , dangerous , and fueled by the absolute delight of seeing peter yoon irritated . “ ‘ zero reason ’ ? ha ha . maybe before i didn’t have a reason . you weren’t even on my radar , like , seriously . absolutely . fucking . unmemorable . until you started sniffing around my best friend . ” and to be absolutely clear , nia knows she’s wrong . knows she’s harassing someone simply because they might ( and she doesn’t even know for sure ) have gone on a date with the girl she likes … loves … right after nia kissed her . so , yeah … her feelings feel justified , even if her actions aren’t . nia is hurting , and they’re intense , and someone’s gotta pay . eight is just … caught up in this whole … tangled mess of dramatic , obsessive friendship - slash - relationship situation that overflows with scheming , cheating and all - out sabotage . and it’s not fair , not really , they know ! nia tried to hate juno , they really did . but it’s juno . it’s always been juno . so instead , all that anger and hurt gets dumped on eight . “ did you just call me a ‘ pick me girl ’ ? don’t you see how misogynistic that is , peter ? and why , why in the world would i want attention here ? i don’t need attention , especially not yours . all i want is for you to be miserable . that’s it . hope that clears things up for you . ” a theatrical shrug , all mock sincerity . “ awww , thanks for the concern , jackass . but i’m feeling pretty great right now . how about you practice what you preach and check in with those hospital therapists , huh ? careful though , that giant stick up your ass might make the waiting room chair uncomfortable . oh , and get yourself a yogurt parfait while you're at it — those appointments can take forever . ”
“ i need a brain break . best indie coffee shop around here , your call . ” // @lovesues
“ i would kill for your fashion sense . seriously , is there , like , a support group for closet - envy or something ? ” // @rainforum
“ dude , that coffee smells killer . teach me your ways , oh master of the bean . or at least share your order . seriously , i was this close to chewing on raw beans like some kind of crazy woodland creature . ” // @haydcns
