I fucking hate Ape Escape 3 SO MUCH to the point where any mention of it gives me total disgust. I despise it so much. I hate literally EVERYTHING about this game — the graphics, character designs, and most of all, the PLOT 💀💀💀
You really had to try hard to butcher a character this badly — turning a badass villain who literally rewrote history in the previous games into just some clueless monkey (as funny as that sounds). What did he even do in 3?! What the hell was his plan?! Make all humans dumb and... slice the Earth in half so monkeys live on one side and humans on the other... What in the absolute fuck is that bullshit?!?
Yeah I get that Specter’s helmet went through a lot of changes and permanent debuffs by part 3, but THIS MUCH?! Plus, it pisses me off so much that they never even showed us how Specter got the helmets back!!! Dr. Tomoki clearly had nothing to do with it. They just threw in "Oh look Specter teamed up with a fucking human"... Bro you wanted ZERO contact with humans before this, what happened to you?! Did your IQ drop to zero or what?! Alright Specter I get your helmet isn't what it used to be but teaming up with a human... That's so low... Gosh how can a plot be THIS braindead?! How could they do such a half-assed job on everything?! Specter, with your helmet you're supposed to be smart, not a total dumbass get it?! Okay done talking about Specter's goal now onto the MCs
They are so annoying honestly. Every time they were on screen I wanted to puke. It's such a weird dissonance when the MCs act all serious and self-important while the villains are... constantly laughing at everything... Specter tries to force all that edginess he had in the previous games but it's not intimidating anymore because these MCs are supposedly "cool and righteous." It's so boring to watch them, and the way the game tries to make them out to be so good with zero flaws — like, who finds characters like that interesting to watch?!
In the previous games, the MCs actually had personality. I especially gotta bring up Jimmy, who literally caused all the events in his game. Spike had a bit of that "super ideal character" vibe too, but he still felt alive — his motivation wasn't only "because I was told to" but also to save his friend. These AE3 MCs are completely hollow. I feel like I'm watching lifeless dolls.
And when the villains are so blatantly portrayed as comedic having kids who are more serious than the villains doesn't look funny it looks terrible tbh. Like, fine if Specter was the only villain, he at least tries to be frightening. But Tomoki running a whole clown show? You're a grown-ass man, what are you doing?! Tomoki gave off purely cringe vibes, not "funny and charismatic character"
I don't even wanna talk about Aki (or whatever her name is) — just some woman I literally remember nothing about her.I hate that SHE gives orders to the MCs instead of Natalie. Especially when Natalie gets replaced by Charu — like WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!
And about the Freaky Monkey Five... I get that they're "freaky" and all but what's happening in AE3 is pure brainrot. Like okay,I can accept your personalities but guys WHAT THE FUCK WITH YOUR DESIGNS 😭😭😭 It’s so awful they butchered them so bad. Like what are those fishnet tights on Yellow Monkey?! What is White Monkey’s outfit?! Why does he have sandals?! Why shoulder pads?! WHY THE FUCK DOES HE HAVE METAL UNDERWEAR?! Blue Monkey looks utterly hideous what kind of cowboy shit is that?! Nothing left to say about him, sure he's not over-designed, but it still looks terrible. Pink Monkey looks somewhat okay compared to the rest, but looking at her alone... what is that purple-pink mess?! It doesn't match at all and just blends together, my eyes literally hurt looking at those colors. The lime green kind of saves it, but barely. Red Monkey has the only decent design. I actually like his design better than his original from AE2
Basically I fucking hate this game and I refuse to accept it as real Ape Escape. Any media featuring AE3 characters isn't canon to me. It's easier for me to consider it an entirely different franchise
There's just one thing I can't wrap my head around... Why does this scuffed game have so many fans?! I genuinely don't get it — AE1 and AE2 exist, why be a fan of THIS trash?... The sheer amount of fans makes me so mad. I wonder if anyone else shares my hatred for this game, I really hope so
and I'd like to hear why do you like this game .. . Pls tell me i rrly don't get it
