"See? It’s not bad being out in the public eye when you look this good!” “We-... we could say the same to you. You... you cutie.”
Here’s an ENTIRELY self-indulgent piece of ship art commissioned from the wonderful @tunewtuthis!!!!

blake kathryn
i don't do bad sauce passes
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
tumblr dot com
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🪼
DEAR READER
Cosmic Funnies
One Nice Bug Per Day
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
No title available

Kiana Khansmith
AnasAbdin
we're not kids anymore.
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
d e v o n
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

@theartofmadeline
Keni
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
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seen from Germany

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seen from Spain
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seen from T1
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@dis--parity
"See? It’s not bad being out in the public eye when you look this good!” “We-... we could say the same to you. You... you cutie.”
Here’s an ENTIRELY self-indulgent piece of ship art commissioned from the wonderful @tunewtuthis!!!!
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ ❝ Bats live in caves, silly... and I am looking to inhabit yours. ❞
『🍬』 "... sure. You get points for bein' direct, so let's make it happen. Just so long as we don't gotta fuck in a coffin; I think think of a quicker way to kill the mood."
Tag your OCs as the four horsemen of anxiety!
SEXUALITY AND GENDER IDENTITY THEMED PROMPTS FOR PRIDE
❝ i guess i always kinda knew? it just wasn’t that important until i got older. ❞
❝ it never mattered to me like, what form people came in. i love souls, the body is just kinda like pretty packaging. it’s nice but it’s not what’s important to me. ❞
❝ oh yeah i did the whole ‘massive crush on my best friend’ thing. wouldn’t recommend it. ❞
❝ today my gender is kinda of ‘meeehh?’ ❞
❝ yeah of course i’m only into women, have you seen them? ❞
❝ i think i had a harder time accepting myself than my family ever did. ❞
❝ i’m pretty sure everyone else knew i was gay before i ever realized it. ❞
❝ i have a hard time talking about it, even now—i’m not ashamed or anything like that. i just, don’t really know…how or what to say i guess. ❞
❝ i think i’m ready to actually come out to them. ❞
❝ i really want to tell them but i don’t wanna do it alone…could you help me with it? ❞
❝ the ‘am i gay’ quizzes are a gateway drug. ❞
❝ would you mind using [insert pronouns] for me now? i’m trying to see how it feels. ❞
❝ they’re right actually, i’m gay and i do have an agenda to make everything gayer. ❞
❝ ever since i told them i’m gay they keep pointing to every slightly attractive man and asking if he’s my type. ❞
❝ me? no i don’t think i’m—i mean. yeah sometimes i think about what it’d be like to kiss girls/guys but i’d never…come on, everyone thinks about it a little bit right? ❞
❝ at this point the closet is literally made of glass. ❞
❝ actually, i’m [insert identity]. ❞
❝ it’s all ‘i wish i was into women it’d be so much easier’ until you find out about the lesbian drama. ❞
❝ i’m bisexual and confused. not about being bi, though. just like…in general. about life. ❞
❝ i just need a nice bear to throw me around for a few hours, i think it’d do more for me than therapy. ❞
❝ i would trust any stone butch with my life. ❞
❝ sappho would be so proud. ❞
❝ i’m still figuring myself out. i know i’m not straight, that’s a start. ❞
❝ i finally figured out my sexuality and then boom here comes a gender identity crisis. ❞
❝ i’ve just…never really been interested in the whole sex thing. ❞
❝ anyway, if neither of us find our true loves in the next five to ten years, wanna have a lavender marriage? for the taxes. ❞
❝ you wanna come to pride with me? ❞
❝ this is my first pride actually, i’m kinda nervous. ❞
❝ well, this seems as good a time as any to come out. ❞
❝ no one can know about this—it’s just between us okay? ❞
❝ i’d never tell anyone. ❞
❝ you don’t owe anyone ‘coming out.’ it’s personal, do things at your own pace. only tell the people you want to. ❞
❝ you’ve always made me feel safe so, i just knew i could tell you about it. ❞
❝ everyone’s hot and i’m a disaster who doesn’t know how to ask anyone out. ❞
❝ i’m not sure i wanna fuck them or be them. ❞
❝ i’m just experimenting i guess, trying to figure out what i like. ❞
❝ she said she didn’t see us working out but then she brought me a potted plant so i guess it’s still up in the air. ❞
❝ i want to be one of those bold, unapologetic people but i’m still just terrified. ❞
❝ she’s so pretty i think i’m gonna die. ❞
❝ oh, no he’s got a great smile too. i’m in deep this time. ❞
❝ how did you know? like for sure that you were into [gender]? ❞
❝ do you mind if i ask you a question about being [identity]? ❞
❝ thank you for trusting me with this. ❞
❝ it’s okay, take your time to put it into the right words. i’m not going anywhere. ❞
❝ wait, you think i’m [identity]? what makes you say that? ❞
❝ i’m here, i’m queer, i wanna leave. ❞
one of my toxic traits is experiencing immense pain and just not telling anyone at all
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ ❝ Just say you have a kink for being topped by fembats and I'll Suckula and Fukkula you all night long. You might even cum-uloat. ❞
『🍬』 "What, you, on top? Good one. I'd ask if that's where you actually see yourself, but, y'know... besides, I haven't even invited you to come inside yet."
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ ❝ I can DRAIN a human in seconds ──ཀཀ gag reflex who ──ཀཀ more like down your cockferatu. I'll show you. ❞
『🍬』 "You'll show me, huh? Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you? Ain't hard to tell which head your blood's rushin' to, Cock Suckula."
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ ❝ Blockul-ing your mom -! Fukkul-ing your dad ! BEWARE OF Fukkula! I am going to cuckluya' !! ❞
『🍬』 "Pfft- keep dreamin', Cuckferatu. Call me once you get enough game to graduate from suckin' blood to suckin' dick, though I'm guessin' you don't have much practice with either."
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ ❝ They call me count Fukkula, ‘cause I’ll fuck you UP. ❞
『🍬』 "That's gotta be the only fuckin' you do. That's why they also call you Cock Blockula."
ㅤ ㅤ ཐི [+..••] ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⏻ㅤ Those panicking lungs take a breath of relief after hearing the proclamation of the other. He was SO WORRIED he was overstepping--- but admittedly, he was such a BIG FAN he would have punished himself if he hadn't asked. Even if he was WRONG--- the what if would have been more haunting than the embarrassment if mistaken.
Trying to appear more composed ( but freaking out on the inside ) Alois smiles brightly and takes the phone closer to his chest. ❝ R-really? You would do that? ❞ The excitement in his voice is almost that of a child's while he gives her a slight bow.
ㅤ ㅤ ❝ You don't have to do that... but I would be extremely grateful. Almost forgot, I'm Alois. I..i could pay you. After all, you were just out here enjoying your day, and I feel like I am asking you to WORK. ❞ For that, he feels truly guilty -- but he just couldn't pass up this opportunity--- what if he never sees her again? A regret for what ; 100, 200 years...
『🌹』 "Alois? Yo, that's suuuuuch an exquisite name! Is that, like, French, or somethin'?" Yeong-Hui's eyes instantly take to scanning this man's features - they weren't about to make any presumptions as to how genuine his passion was, but he definitely seemed of a nervous disposition, with a side of humility that bordered on self-deprecation. Maybe this meeting was exactly what he needed.
"Gurl, don't be ridiculous, you ain't need to pay me nothin'! I do this for love of the game, ain't no work in it for me except what I give on the runway!" With practiced, almost rehearsed ease, they hold out their hand towards the pale-skinned man. Even if they had the ego for it, and it showed in the way they towered over him in both height, stature, and pure speaking confidence, they never would have imagined they would be the subject of an immortal pursuit.
"C'mon, hand your phone here. If not an autograph, we can toooootally take a selfie to save the moment, yeah?"
do you ever feel yourself fail a charisma check in real time
"Thanks, but I'm pretty chill with the way I am. How about instead of your male friend then, I could be your cool friend? Doesn't have to be a gender thing, yeah?"
『🔧』 "Y'know what? That- I think that works for me! And I'll- I'll be your coolest friend, obviously!" She could not mean that in more of a sarcastic, self-deprecating way, but that doesn't mute her eagerness at actually making a friend out of this man. Although...
"Besides, how many people do you know who have a robot arm?"
@cosmicdreamt | x.
『👿』 "You and us both. Least we know it's nothing you haven't seen before. Pretty sure we met in the bath." That seems to be the only reason why xe's so comfortable rising up from where xe lays in bed, letting the covers fall off xem and xir host's silken tresses fall gracefully over xir chest.
Xe has no real room for the peace that comes with only just waking up, of course. Just when xe thought xe wasn't out because of some imminent, immediate threat, Neff goes ahead and proves xem wrong. Xir sigh is as heavy as the proverbial crown as xe casts xir eyes over to where Neff lays. "Can't trust the love of your life with this? Hope you're not asking us for advice on how to handle them. But we'll listen. Pass us a shirt?"
Once they were adequately covered by such a garment, xe finally deigns themself to rise out of bed, and to xir feet - stumbling a little as xe gets xir footing. "... don't even want to know what you two did last night. Bad enough back when it was short-term relationships."
𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐢𝐭, he feels a bit ridiculous about how dismissive it sounded. Of course he meant marriage for them, and yet Theo rolls with it with such ease, as if Airin didn’t just make an utter fool of himself. Which he is heavily grateful Theo didn’t draw immediate attention to the it—as the mention of marriage has already dredged up some old wounds. Though, it’s only the pain of them that’s throbbing.
But, even as Theo casually speaks on the what-ifs of that possible future, Airin can’t let it rest. If they were to be married one day, he’d want it to be special, something far more personable and deserving of Theo and his love. Some shindig in Las Vegas feels too… chaotic. Which is something he adores about the little gremlin—their energies are so perfectly aligned. Yet, their histories are already riddled with bullshit, so… why not consider making it into something calm and romantic for them both? That is…
Looking up from his mug, Airin sets it on the counter to look at him. He's trying so hard to keep his composure. " Theo, do you… actually want to marry me? "
『🍬』 The joking stops only too soon, or perhaps it never started. It had been so difficult to tell for so long that Theo had just accepted it as one of the circumstances of their relationship, the constant bouncing off each other, a neverending stream of 'yes, and'. But as Airin's voice softens and his hand glides away from his mug, the sincerity of the question hits him like nothing has in a long time.
He lowers his mug to his waist level, his finger tracing around the coffee-stained rim as he steps forward. The silence that follows, broken up only by the occasional slow breath, lasts just under a minute before he finally speaks up. "... there was a time I never thought I'd get the chance. I mean, I only had one other person I'd be willin' to go that far with, and for what? I put in all that work and effort just for him to blow his brains out without a goodbye. I got bad when I thought about it like that, I thought... I'd never find a love that brought me to that point again, or if I did, then I'd lose it before then. So I never thought about marriage all that much."
He joins his lover where he stands, moving his arm down so that their mugs can share a spot on the table. His free arm drifts towards Airin's forearm, fingers gliding up the soft musculature in a gesture that betrays the nonchalance he held with everyone else. "Like I said, this... this isn't my way of askin' if you wanna get hitched. But... when I actually think about it, I can't picture it bein' with anyone else but you. And I dunno if that means I'm healed, or if I still have a long way to go, but... I think I'm warmin' up to the idea, at least. So, I gotta ask again...
What do you think about gettin' married, Airin?"
『🔧』 "Uuuugh... living in cold climates all my life didn't- it did nothing to prepare me for this heat! I- I just wanna stay at home and sit in front of my fan with- with my tits out, but I gotta go to work instead..."
"Is it tha' hot? I haven't noticed."
Then again, he's gotten so used to living in the south that muggy air's more common than not. Plus, he runs so hot most of the time he supposes he doesn't actually notice when it gets too hot. If it does, he just drops the jacket and walks around in a plain shirt.
『🔧』 "I- I mean... like I said, I grew up where it's snowing all the time, I dunno about you." She didn't want to assume that the fact that this stranger was built like a brick shithouse had anything to do with his heat tolerance, but it's a detail she can't stop herself from fixating on.
"I seriously need to invest in some air conditioning... it's not that common in Europe, is it?"
ཐི ( ᶠᶸᶜᵏ ᵧₒᵤ! ) ཋྀ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ⊱༒︎ There was something about being so nonchalantly moved to the side that made him want to yell like a MAD MAN ──ཀཀ BUT panic sets in faster than he can think when they open the door. How could this happen? Every time he said there was a spider, it would send people running ──ཀཀ MOSTLY AMBER ──ཀཀ a hole-proof plan. FUCK ᵎ!ᵎ FUCK ᵎ!ᵎ FUCK ᵎ!ᵎ THE FEAR could be seen on Aluin's face as he tries to cover the BLOODY CLOSET ( far too many empty bloodbags in there for anything normal for even a vampire ) with arms far too small to hide it.
❝ Umm.... ❞ He stops panicking to think ──ཀཀ does something smell like it's burning? ❝ I am on my period... I mean, my sister is on her period... ❞
『🍬』 "What the FUCK?!" There's no way he's going to calm down or apologise for that immediate, visceral reaction any time soon. Looking between the man behind him and that blood-stained closet, lined with empty blood bags, his adrenaline-fuelled brain trying to piece together just how the pale, stringy-figured man before him could be capable of arranging a sight like this.
He's not getting away until he gets those answers - it doesn't matter how calm he's being right now, it doesn't stop Theo's hand immediately grabbing the lapel of his shirt to keep him in place. "The fuck is wrong with you?! You think this shit is funny?! You better start explaining - why the fuck did you do this? Where'd you even get this many fuckin' blood bags?! You break out of a hospital or somethin'? You already look like you got one foot in the grave!"
legends of avantris : dimwits of the dimwood ep. 4 … sentence starters
"Get fucked, bee!"
"I can't ration this."
"Ooooh, close, buddy, close."
"I lost my left nipple that day."
"No, I could get naked, though."
"I invented magic not magnets."
"His new mortal enemy is taxes."
"Oh, we're going to kill my family!"
"It's gonna be in your fur for weeks."
"Can't stop me from getting naked."
"There's a lesson here: taxes are bad."
"Just stand back and watch the mayhem."
"This is so much worse than the poisoning!"
"If you would just put your clothes back on…"
"Look around you. You see nothing but foes."
"I was gonna ask you if this was all worth it…"
"I just wanted to be respected… and have gold."
(dazed) "I don't want to go to the circus, father..."
"I missed a lot of them. Those fuckers can jump."
"Hi, my name's (name), and I'm an agent of chaos."
"It's probably gonna be worth more than gold soon."
"You see my clothes covered in blood? It's not mine."
"Oh, and we gave them a weapon of mass destruction."
"This is simultaneously the best and worst day of my life."
"My dream is a nightmare filled with bloodshed and clowns."
"He was very excited to become a murderous rage weapon of war."
"Well, hold on, I think the monster that ate both (name)s makes a good point."
"We saved a life and we stole from these crooked crooks. It's all win-win for me."
"We're becoming infamous, you know. That's pretty cool when you think about it."
"It's gonna really hard for me to point them all out when they're wearing clothes."
"I always knew the creator of the universe was gonna be intelligent enough to graduate from clown college."
"The worst part about it was that it was supposed to come with a side of French fries, but none of them even said, 'oui oui'!"