✨Dream Catcher✨

Indie rp blog for original character Nefeloma Marianela Leocadia.

[cosmicdreamt]

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ To the stars who listen and

the dreams that are answered ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

A journey of self discovery and acceptance; the importance of found family and exploration of grey areas; finding magic in yourself and the world. Meet Nefeloma Marianela Leocadia - a 24 year old café barista, artist, and magical human with the ability to walk through people's dreams.

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Verses Include: Fandomless (Main/Cafe/Deity) || Fantasy || BSD (ADA/PM) || Trigun ||

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Memes || Opens

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Affiliates: mundanemiseries || adsanare || expiredchances

Mains: nihilomania || mannequinentity || foolshcme || eldinwind

Blogroll: Scarlet (The Path)

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ Rules and About (Please read BEFORE following) || Dreamer Guidebook (currently being reworked) || As Above/So Below - Origa and Astraeus Side Stories (currently being reworked) || DreamCatcher (Coming Soon!) ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚We’re nothing but stardust, floating˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚

[the27percent]

Atieno thinks for a moment. What exactly do they want from Neff at this moment? Sometimes it really is hard for them to express the needs that they have.

"Um. I don't know about advice. " That's not something they really are requesting.. sincerely.

"Maybe help in processing it better would be helpful. Just because it's a hard feeling to have especially when it kind of seems unjustifiable in a way for me."

[cosmicdreamt]

"Gotcha." Which is exactly why she asked. Now she knew it would be better for her to be asking questions based on what she was understanding from them, rather than trying to actively 'fix' anything. She's interested in hearing why they believe their feelings are unjustifiable - especially when it comes to a feeling akin to grief.

"Alrighty then, I'm all ears. Take all the time you need to process to figure out where you wanna start."

[luvccubus]

❝ Bein' human sounds scary, ❞ Eros mumbled, ❝ It sounds even scarier to suddenly become a goddess out of nowhere. ❞

No matter how Cupid && Eros relished in their divinity, they understood that some were not built for something so intense. Humans often squandered their immortality && their power when it was granted by the gods, though Neff didn't seem the type.

❝ I've always just kinda' known, ❞ They were born a demigod, ❝ All of the energy drainin' && illusions just came naturally. The only thing I had to learn was usin' guns n' a bow n' arrow. Guns didn't exist yet when I was born. Now it's had t' find a better shot than me. ❞

❝ Um...maybe we can help you? ❞ Eros said, ❝ We know a little about dreams. ❞

Cupid perked, ❝ Oh yeah, we can definitely help ya'. I've dated someone who could travel through dreams, so I know a lil' more than people like me. ❞

[cosmicdreamt]

"Oh! I'm - "

Honestly unsure about what to say to that offer. It's not that she didn't appreciate the offer for help, she's just....

"I'm just unsure about exactly where to start. That and I...try to give myself breaks when I can. I had the worst insomnia because I was always so afraid of what would happen when I went to sleep. I used to suffer bad nightmares about my dad, and then it was like I was thrown into this role so much bigger than me. I wasn't sure if I was going to have dreams of my own or end up with an awake subconscious to the point it feels like I didn't sleep at all."

It feels weird to have this made about her now. She was supposed to be helping them relax and recover from their own situation....though maybe turning the attention on her was helping them do that in a way.

"So...now that I've got more control I'm trying to catch up on actually resting when I sleep. Or at least dedicate time to it if there are things I need to take care of. It's...a lot. Very complicated and exhausting. I feel like there's so many rules to my abilities....or maybe it's more like I'm setting boundaries with them because I still want to remain humble and cling to my mortal roots."

Maybe it's both.

"I've been dream walking since I was about five, but I've been doing it as a 'job' for....I dunno....almost ten years now? Precisely closer to seven or eight."

[smokes-and-bullets]

He didn’t expect her to talk this much, staring smiling, listening and taking her words in, though this was more information than he expected. Music, art, instruments, poetry, dancing though he winced at the mention of pole dancing, only because of his own experience with it. Granted he still enjoyed it on his own time but it was still a reminder of how people were, the faces, the expressions, he can never forget how uncomfortable and uneasy it made him. Poking at his food as she went on, the schools and college here sounded interesting.

“That’s.. a lot to do for a school of education.” Extra activities. “It never got overwhelming to do all that?” He wasn’t sure how the scheduling was. Never been to school, at least American ones granted elementary schools anywhere probably didn’t really count. Assumed it was the same for all places, anything above though probably different.

“I’ve never been to any schools here, I was… I guess you can say home schooled?” If you would even call it that. “But I think its fascinating how much you can do outside of just educational things.”

Smiling at her seemingly eagerness to to take him to a few museums, he shook his head at her question of an aquarium. “I haven’t been to any, I would like to do though, it seems like fun. Granted you’re just walking around looking at things but.. even as simple as it is, it sounds nice.”

[cosmicdreamt]

"Well, to be fair, I didn't do it all during school, or even for school. Art has always been a hobby of mine I just decided to make my major in college. Singing is also something I've always done that I decided to participate in. Dance I never did for school, that was part of my therapy for my low self esteem. I still have moments when I relapse, but I'm nowhere near as bad as I used to be."

Well, maybe that wasn't entirely true, but Fran didn't need to know that. It's more like she just changed the way she went about it which...still wasn't the healthiest, but at least she's not having breakdowns over it anymore.

"That said, going to zoos and aquariums and museums was something I did enough of in school, be it a field trip or an art study. I think there's something calming yet fun about observing things. Oh! We can go to science centers too! Lots of fun interactive stuff! Definitely gotta bring hand sanitizer with us but it'll be worth it! Oooohhhhh and it's not the same but there's all sorts of pop-ups that come around, either for lights or mirrors or what have you. I know I'm just bringing up a whole bunch of things now but I do think you'd like them a lot!"

When it came to things like they they seemed to have similar, if not the same, taste. When the thinks of the atmosphere of an aquarium, or the shows at the science centers, or the interactive displays of these mirror and light pop ups - she feels like she can already see how intrigued he'd be.

[magnusalterum]

Lovecraft was silent for a moment, focusing on the seawater washing over his feet. He'd missed the comfort of the sea since he had entered a contract with Mori && while Nefeloma assured him otherwise, he felt he wouldn't visit the sea for a long while. The feeling settled itself within his stomach && his chest ached like wire had been wound around it. He showed no sign of his shift in emotion, appearing to just be absorbed with the water he waded through.

❝ We're friends? ❞ he asked finally, her words fully registering in his mind.

Lovecraft had had friends before, but it was a rare occasion && he hardly sought people out to be his friend. Eventually, all those who he had held close eventually left or rather, he abandoned them in order to selfishly do something without them. He thought back to their conversation they'd had before they'd left for the beach.

Could he build a friendship with someone so soon after he'd left behind someone he'd known for four years? Lovecraft had been broken up with before, what he felt now was similar, though the sting was not as deep. Both times it had been his fault.

❝ I didn't...think there was room for friends in the Mafia. ❞

[cosmicdreamt]

"If you'd like to be. I would."

She, on the other hand, folds her arms behind herself and shifts her position as to not sink into the sand in one place. It's possible it sounded a bit juvenile, but she frankly didn't care.

"Depends who you ask. Some aren't afraid to admit they have friends, would even go as far as to call us all family - while some are more hesitant about labels like that for their own reasons. Me? I'm a bit inbetween. Certain people I feel more inclined to call friends than I would others. I feel like you and I could get along well enough to be considered friends. I feel like....you're someone I'd enjoy having around."

The question was if he felt the same enough. She wouldn't take it personally if he didn't, nor would she dwell too long on the thought. The sounds of the waves and seagulls by the port quieted her brain, closing her eyes to once again breathe in the air.

[tonksxmagicalxroleplayxmemes]

[solarisligatus]

When it came to beings that harbored souls - everything was more complex. Even the relationship between their fathers could be confusing at times. Granted, primordial entities must be far more complicated than humans were - but that didn't mean they were easy to understand.

"I do not think I understand..."

Complicated but not. It wasn't like Doll was really in a place to judge. Before their creation, their fathers hadn't exactly had the easiest time in their relationship either. How many arguments had they had? How many mass extinctions? Too many to count if they remembered correctly.

"...me? Beyond what I have told you, there isn't much. I do not have nor understand... hobbies. Wherever Fate deigns that I go is where I go. Though, before living on your... Earth I spent much of my time in the Spaces Between. The realms of Life and Death were where I 'grew up' if one could call it that. I spent many centuries there before coming here."

[cosmicdreamt]

Well, she doesn't blame them. Half the time Neff doesn't exactly understand her relationship either, though now she was at least starting to understand it, and by extension him, better.

And now her curiosity is doing the same with Doll, though she's getting the feeling they kind of just...exist...rather than live. She's not sure if situation like that was more simple or more lonely - though maybe to them they didn't really consider it like that.

"What was that like? I've astral projected before - first time I did it was actually genuinely terrifying. It's like I was a ghost - not dead, but not physical and not able to be seen. Certain people would react to me, but more like they weren't sure if they really saw or heard what they did. But that moment was the way it was for me since I was born human and lived a human life."

"If that was essentially your 'home', I think it's safe to say the experience was a lot different."

[llunarum]

❝Thoughts-wise? Not much.❞

When was there ever? More of a "in the moment" kind of person, found if he did let his thoughts wander they'd end up tangled up. Messy, hard to deal with, hard to sort through, frustrating. Easier to keep his mind, relatively, empty.

Still, he's pointing at a lone tree in the middle of the yard. Close enough to the forest line to not stick out, but still separate. A worn-out old oak, nothing special, but very special at the same time.

❝That one used to be a tree swing. For a few years anyway, before I started to be more interested in learning than playing. Must've taken it down fully after my last visit, the ropes used to just hang there, kind of an eyesore- sentimental one, but still.❞

Probably didn't give the best idea to the few people that visited Rui either, an old hunter with rope hanging from a tree? Probably thought he used to hang people from there.

❝Used to sleep at the top when I was younger, any time I could avoid going with him to the other hunters and their families I was probably asleep up there.❞

[cosmicdreamt]

Avoid? That was some choice wording, though she supposes she never really considered there was a time Alaire was a child, once, and may not have always had the interest in hunting that he did now. Her mind instantly starts wondering what type of child he was. Did he talk more, then? Or was he always selectively mute?

"I feel like I know so much about you...and yet nothing at the same time. I can tell someone your favorite cake, that you hate sleeping in comfortable spaces, that you grew up fucked up and told not to get close to people..." She's teasing a bit with the last part. "...but hearing you talk about your past now I feel like I have so many questions. I wanna get to know little Alaire, too. Especially because it turns out we both used to like sleeping in trees when we were younger."

There's softness and adoration in her voice, finding herself speaking much more gently and lower when alone with him. Maybe it was his own speaking volume rubbing off on her, or maybe it was that feeling of just feeling like she was talking too loud in comparison.

"What things did you like to do before you started training to be a hunter?"

[auvaiis]

Kane nodded as he looked forward again to focus once more, he took it up on himself to get it right. He took a deep breath in and focused his energy to where it was needed. A soft blue glow had formed on the palms of his hands and suddenly a small burst of ice had shot out and it hit the ground hard causing some more jagged peaks. The ice elemental went again and again trying to perfect it but it was harder than he imagined. "Shit.." he said in a hushed whisper.

[cosmicdreamt]

"Hey, it's alright."

Neff stands next to him, placing her hand on his shoulder to support him.

"Regulation is hard, doesn't matter if it's powers or emotions. I still struggle with both, to be honest." And she's not ashamed of it. It's human to do so, after all. To expect perfection all the time is to strip someone of their humanity. "Let's try a different approach. Tell me all the things that make you feel calm. Doesn't matter if it's places, sounds, foods, people, actions, name them all! Like for me it's things like the sound and smell of rain, the smell of coffee, when a ray of sun hits me just right, the sound of my Agilisi's voice,when someone hugs me with their full arms....things like that."

[the27percent]

Atieno listens to Neff's pretty much knowing that she does very much have a point. But they aren't really sure how to get into the habit of actually just asking and being okay with asking regularly again.

"Hm. Right. I suppose you're correct. That sense of self-denial though, that comes pretty hard ingrained after a while."

It's a low admission that they state with no pride, just kind of a bit of exhaustion of how present it has been with them.

"Hm. Appreciate it. I ...I just been carrying some grief that's been coming up pretty hard for me lately. Or at least.. something comparable to grief if not the exact sensation so that is probably what is having me feeling more vulnerable in a way. "

[cosmicdreamt]

Ah. Grief. A feeling she's well acquainted with even to this day, simply giving a slow nod in understanding. Sometimes it can overwhelm you in a way you're not exactly sure how to explain, usually because there's so many layers to it then just feeling sad.

"Well, before I get ahead of myself, let me ask you if you want advice or just someone to listen? Or to help you process it a bit better? Because I don't wanna end up running my mouth if that's not what you need."

Because she was well aware of her habit to start 'trying to help' when someone came to her about something, and for some it did the exact opposite.

[mannequinentity]

@cosmicdreamt | Continued

Katsu stepped into the waters even if every hair raising on his back was telling him to back away. It was unbearable, these temperatures. The weird noise he made behind chattered teeth, resembling a mouse, was almost embarrassing.

It won't take long for his body to get accustomed to the cold.

His voice, however, was more stuttery than ever before.

"These….it— it's f—fineee. Will…get..get used to th—this…" He left himself submerged halfway from chin to nose.

Like a crocodile or a shark with eyes beguiling her. They were almost similar to 'puppy' pupils. Whatever he was pretending to be, it's not the apex predators of the seven seas. It was the first thing he wanted to do as soon they set foot on this beach. His dream came true, and he was satisfied, bubbles surfacing up near his red-tinted face.

It's all he could provide…

Looking at her with those precious eyes.

[cosmicdreamt]

"Pfft--"

"What are you doing over there, hm?"

Crystal lavender eyes stare right back at him while she decides to use the tie around her wrist to pull her hair up, just so the breezy sea air wasn't blowing it all over the place.

"I can't tell if you're scheming or just being cute."

Once the hair is up she crosses her arms over her chest, raising an eyebrow in playful suspicion. Katsu had his own playful side, after all. Either he was hunting her down to try and splash her or he was just innocently enjoying himself in all the ways he wanted to at the beach.

[adsanare]

{ ♪ } -- She was absolutely engrossed in Neff's explanation of magic. Bella had always had a fascination for it, wondering about it and trying to figure out what, exactly, made it work. She had suspicions of her own magical abilities, but had never really tried to force them. It was better to learn before trying, just like looking into exercises before doing them. She didn't want to hurt herself after all.

And who better to ask than her best friend? Someone she knew wielded powerful magic was far better than most anyone else she could think of. And she was getting a great response.

"So, make sure to give thanks... I think I've been using magic without even realizing it. My patients overall seem to recover quicker and more effectively than others that I don't see. And I've had weird tingles in my palms. Sometimes I swear I see a green light around my hands, but I've been chalking it up to my nystagmus acting up."

[cosmicdreamt]

"Well, the 'give thanks' part is truly dependent on the type of magic user you are. Some who are given their magic are only given it in exchange for working for someone else, so that's a trade off. If the thought of giving thanks for your abilities resonates with you, then by all means go right on ahead!"

Because one of the most important things was making sure someone felt a type of 'freedom' with how they went about it. There were rules, but it didn't always apply to everyone, which is something people tend to forget.

"Also depending on the type of magic, there'll be visual cues that go with it or not. Lights, including colored ones, are indeed part of the cues. Green is pretty common for healing magic, so it checks out. We can always try and test it, but I'm not sure how without someone needing to be hurt."

Definitely something to think about.

[mannequinentity]

"I do need someone to make my tea in the morning. You and Katsu will be paid dividends if you let me hire you both as baristas. So, please." Anyway, to rid herself of this morning fatigue, forcing herself to move away from heaven that is her bed, and into a whole weekday of work.

Of course, it was a joke since she can't hold off that quivering lip.

"But I'm glad." She took another sip. "And he told you already?" It should be necessary for a couple to share where they came from or how they came to be in the present. The thought disturbed her, knowing the past that haunts him.

"I mean, where he came from. I feel it should be important for both sides of the same party to express their livelihoods, but I understand if he's not ready. He never told me for a long time until there was some trust. I care for Katsu, really do, but…"

How to describe him was a different story. He was a mess before, but even then, flowers with fragile shields can still break.

"Sometimes, I still worry for him."

[cosmicdreamt]

Neff found amusement in Vanessa's little joke about hiring them, huffing out a chortle in response at the thought. She never really thought about or considered being someone's personal barista, nor was it really anything she'd take the time to think about unless she was genuinely offered.

Especially when still on the topic of Katsu and the things he's been through.

"No, he hasn't told me a lot yet. I've made it very clear with him that I'm not someone that's going to push him to tell me things he's not ready to. Part of being a good friend - " And partner, " - is being patient with someone and understanding that they don't need to tell you everything immediately. It's knowing that a friend is still allowed to have things they keep private, regardless of how safe they feel, unless or until they decide they want to talk about it. I've told him if he ever does want to, I'll be there to listen and support him, but until then I'm not gonna force him to do or tell me anything he doesn't want to."

Because that's how she'd want to be treated, too, and part of why she felt so strongly about him. He treated her with the same care and consideration, their relationship was equal and balanced.

"I'd hope that, no matter what, he knows I'm someone that's not going to run away from him.

[mundanemiseries]

@cosmicdreamt | cont.

He's not sure when those thoughts of his past selves wandered in. Maybe it was when he looked down at the fruit he was cutting up and saw it done the way his mother once did, or he found himself humming an old saturnine folk song his father used to sing as he cared for his blades. Or else it was his noticing he no longer consistently kept a hand on one of the weapons he always carried on his person, it dragged up memories of who he once was all the same.

A child that once dreamed of one day getting to tell the story of mankind's first steps beyond the Origin System, the child that watched that dream die alongside his father, the him that had stained himself in the blood of family, of the family of his peers so they wouldn’t have to live with the weight. The boy that learned to live with a weapon in hand, who watched his closest friend die in his arms, the one who threatened to burn a moon to ash in his rage.

The Koko that had forgotten he was ever anything other than a weapon, the one confronted with the possibility he could be anything but again.

"I think...he'd be glad I can still recognize some part of him. That who we had been before everything hadn't been burned away by the voidlight."

The boy who named them both after that angel of Lua, damned for bringing mankind the stars stands at the edges of his mind, still bright eyed and hopeful. For once, he thinks he can see some fragile part of himself in the boy.

Koko slowly leaned into the hand on his head, eyes drifting shut. The contact used to startle him, once still generally expecting an existence defined by violence.

He thinks back to the Lotus, how gently she had held him as he awoke from the Dream. He knows she had considered him one of her children, he could just never see past Margulis' ghost. Lotta good that did him, now that even that memory was left shattered, eons and systems away.

"I...I still don't know how to feel about everything. Why I'd deserve this...I guess kinder existence? Not to say 'm not grateful or anything I owe you more than I ever think I could repay it's just..."

"after everything...do I really...?" Do I deserve this? Is there really a place for someone like me in a kinder world? goes unspoken.

[cosmicdreamt]

It hurts her heart in more ways than one - the fact that he feels that way and the fact that she can understand. When all you've ever known in your life was sacrifice it was hard to believe you deserved anything else.

So she pulls him into a hug, not too tightly, but firm in security.

"Koko, listen to me. It's not 'after' everything, or 'in spite' of everything, but 'because' of everything...that i think you deserve this more than anything else in the world. The past can't be changed, but we can make changes in the present towards an entirely different future. You were just a child. You didn't deserve any of what happened to you in the first place. You should have been going to a normal school, watching cartoons - or I guess whatever the normal equivalent would have been where you're from."

"But maybe that's why you're here now. With me. So the Kokos you become along the way can experience what it's like to have....well....as close to normal as a life as one can have with a guardian like myself. I'm not exactly the most normal, we both know that."

Neff's laugh is hearty and warm, unable to keep herself from finding more amusement than was necessary in her comment. There was just something so ironic in her being the one to offer him a calm and steady life when her own was anything but. It was almost cruel, even, since she wished more than anything for her life to be able to slow down the way she used to know it.

But if it was possible to give that to someone else who needed it much more than her, she couldn't complain.

"And you don't owe me anything. You know that, right? I took you in because I wanted to - because I wanted to help you. I'm not expecting you to 'pay me back' for that. All I want is for you to finally feel comfortable, and safe, and like you have the space to figure out who you really want to be."

[cosmicdreamt]

"Listen, I'm not the type to go somewhere I know is haunted and start messing with whatever is there. The only time I'll do that is either to help a spirit pass on or to cleanse the space if necessary. I'm not an antagonizer."

"Now if it's the other way around, these hands are rated E for Everyone. You come into my space, be prepared to find out when you fuck around."

[cosmicdreamt]

[[ I'm alive. Kind of. LMAO.

I had my day off today and had chores to do, plus it was my friend's birthday so I spent time with him after he got home from work. I originally was gonna visit my aunt on Saturday but since the weather is gonna be ASS I'm gonna be home now, so that's the plan for replies. Might try to start on a few tonight before bed before I go back to work these next two days. If anything after work on Sunday I'll have 2 days off in a row so I'll have more time then. ]]

[the27percent]

Atieno thinks a little bit about the words that Neff is sharing with them. And they are going to be honest, they had thoughts that they wished they could talk about. There were things that they did want to connect on while know it wasn't really much of a feasible possibility.

Made for an existence that was filled with not daring to expect anything from others.

"I mean. I do find myself wanting company a bit more often than I tend to let on a lot of the time. I just .. know that people have their own responsibilities, their own lives... it's just been hard to know who I can like go to in moments like that. I do appreciate you offering though, it does make a difference. "

[cosmicdreamt]

"You're like me in that regard. Being used to solitude doesn't mean you never get lonely. I think we can both learn to just....ask people....instead of going through that 'they have their own things to take care of and don't have time for me like that' mindset. All we end up doing is denying us those moments of 'but what if they're not', y'know?"

She's not trying to scold them, just relate. Her own feelings are much more complex, but she still knows all too well what it's like to just want someone there but feeling like she can't really ask anyone.

"But it's no problem at all! I figure at least offering is a good start. Plus there's multiple ways you can reach me no matter where you are. I'll get the messages, you can be sure about that. And since the floor is open, if you decide to change your mind and decide there is something you wanna talk about, my ears are open."