FORKTALE

Tertawa karena tak pernah tahu, menangis karena apapun.

[dityansubagja]

Be not defeated by the rain. Nor let the wind prove your better.

Succumb not to the snows of winter. Nor be bested by the heat of summer.

Be strong in body. Unfettered by desire. Not enticed to anger. Cultivate a quiet joy.

Count yourself last in everything. Put others before you.

Watch well and listen closely. Hold the learned lessons dear.

A thatch-roof house, in a meadow, nestled in a pine grove's shade.

A handful of rice, some miso, and a few vegetables to suffice for the day.

If, to the East, a child lies sick: Go forth and nurse him to health.

If, to the West, an old lady stands exhausted: Go forth, and relieve her of burden.

If, to the South, a man lies dying: Go forth with words of courage to dispel his fear.

If, to the North, an argument or fight ensues:

Go forth and beg them stop such a waste of effort and of spirit.

In times of drought, shed tears of sympathy.

In summers cold, walk in concern and empathy.

Stand aloof of the unknowing masses:

Better dismissed as useless than flattered as a "Great Man".

This is my goal, the person I strive to become.

[dityansubagja]

Tidak dengan degup lonceng

Atau juga bunyi dawai

Kita lebih memilih

Melewati pengantar dan menjadi bagian

Padahal kau masih bingung

dengan jarak dari kata-kata ini:

Akan kusisakan semua pagiku

Untuk menyadari namamu

Sementara malamku

Untuk doa yang kita sembunyikan di bawah bantal

[dityansubagja]

21072021

Bukan kita yang menjadi raksasa

Tapi dunia yang menciut

Di sekitar kita

Tak pernah sedetik saja

Irama gerimis berulang sama

Kau adalah kenangan

Tanda, tawa, dan alfa

[dityansubagja]

“This whole time I thought changing the world was something you did, an act you performed, something you fought for. I don’t know if that’s true anymore. But if changing the world is just about being here, by showing up, no matter how many times we get told we don’t belong, by staying true even when we’re shamed into being false, I believe in ourselves when we’re told we’re too different. And if we hold onto that, if we refuse not to budge and fall inline, if we stood our ground for long enough, just maybe, the world can’t help but change around us even though we’ll be gone.”

Mr. Robot

[dityansubagja]

12042021

Raga tak pernah sirna

Hanya diurai

Siput dan alang-alang

Lahir pun akhir

Di ujung doamu

Tertanam padaku

:cemeti, papan catur, dan air raksa

[dityansubagja]

Januari

1. Bright Eyes - First Day of My Life

2. Jirapah - Saturdays

3. Oasis - Sunday Morning Call

4. Conor Oberst - We Are Nowhere and It's Now

5. Mild Orange - Now You Know

6. Nujabes - Aruarian Dance

7. Kashiwa Daisuke - The Afternoon of a Rainy Day

8. Marcel Thee - Endless Heart

9. Castlebeat - Who You Are

10. Johny Goat - Feels Like Were Dying

11. We Lost The Sea - A Gallant Gentleman

12. Black Haus - Cool Bleu

13. Parcels -Withorwithout

14. Skinshape - Filoxiny

15. The Middle East - Blood

16. Sun Daze - Bonsai

17. Fiero - Coupe

18. Elephant Kind - Better Days

19. Nick Lowe - Peace Love and Understanding

20. Stevedreez - IDK

21. Goodnight Electric - Tamat

22. The Fur - Friday Love

23. Ruanghampa - Meter

24. Men I Trust - Pierre

25. Sharon Van Etten - Everytime the Sun Comes Up

26. LCD Soundsystem - Dance Yrself Clean

27. eleventwelfth - Your Head As My Favorite Bookstore

28. Public Service Broadcasting - Everest

29. Thee Oh Sees - I Come From the Mountain

30. Guided By Voices - Game of Pricks

31. Weal - Babylon

[dityansubagja]

SPOILSPORTS

Hope decays and your dreams rot in ecstasy

The only difference between jail and infirmary are bigger windows/You won’t see the sun rise behind that gap

Horizon lies beyond the walls and I can see it clearly in your eyes; the ghosts of vacancy.

We feign death for years, wasting our idiomatic tissues

We are repeating manners of history to be bathed in blood and salt

The graves of our children stacked and fell like jenga

No press coverage

“​A healthy person has a million wishes, a sick person has but one.​” - Confucius

We are more connected than ever

Molder on for we are the vector

Twists in the chains of destruction

Our hate for each other eclipses the night and there is no remedy to it

“​Life goes on between the stern and helm. The restrictions only add to retrospections.​” - Chairil Anwar

Concrete boulders

Enchirudion of lusts

Rancid on a speck of dust

Candles flicker but the pain endured

Almanac turned old

No signal noise to decipher

No man is an island and pestilence is the endless sea

They will rise by and by

It’s in the bag

Always has been

“​This life is a hospital where every patient is possessed with the desire to change beds; one man would like to suffer in front of the stove, and another believes that he would recover his health beside the window.​” - Charles Baudelaire

[dityansubagja]

"And what I have, what I am, is enough, was always enough for me, and as far as my dear little sweet little future is concerned I have no qualms, I have a good time coming."

Samuel Beckett, Molloy

[dityansubagja]

People needed to believe in gods, if only because it was so hard to believe in people."

Pyramids - Terry Pratchett

[dityansubagja]

Ya, kini aku kerja, sedikit mirip seperti biasanya, selain aku tidak tahu bagaimana cara bekerja lagi. Sepertinya itu tidak masalah. Yang aku suka sekarang adalah membicarakan hal-hal yang tersisa, membicarakan salam perpisahan, dan selesai dari sekarat. Mereka tidak menginginkan hal itu. Ya, ada lebih dari satu, sepertinya. Tapi yang datang selalu sama. “Kau akan melakukannya lain kali”, katanya. Baiklah. Sebenarnya aku tidak memiliki semangat lagi.

Dalam usahaku menerjemahkan Molloy karya Samuel Beckett. Semoga akhir tahun ini bisa selesai menerjemahkan trilogi novelnya, termasuk Malone Dies dan The Unnamable.

[dityansubagja]

Kepada Bapak

Bapak mengajar banyak tentang beratan

Di simpul kawat dan tembaga

Tiap pulang dan bersalam

Jemarinya selalu bau logam

Di umurku yang tanggung

Tulang-tulang keluar dari tempatnya

Uban yang terus ditambal

Mata kabur tak kembali

Entah apa maksudnya

Minta anak buat jadi budak negara

Padahal hidupnya seperti kereta

Tanpa stasiun

Kepadaku dia juga minta angka

Padahal jawabku selalu sama

Tujuh, delapan, dua, satu

Adakah di ujung doa itu

Istirahatnya aman?

[dityansubagja]

Y-8321-C

Maukah kau berlabuh

Diiringi denting lonceng

Janji

[dityansubagja]

Spiny Concubine

In your primal state

Auditorial empathy

Moon lies fair

Tome of knowledge

Heathen chemistry

Electronical failure

Doomed tribe

Ecological bullshits

Marital fangs

Omnipotence

Nautical nonsense

[dityansubagja]

'pisau sayatan, preferensimu sayang'

[dityansubagja]

24082019

Mati, hidup, dan kembali

Tanpa pernah tahu kapan harus berhenti

-Perkara dan janji

Nama di antara bunyi-

Tidak kah hari

Sedetik saja

Melewatkan irama?

Padahal kita sama-sama mengutuknya

Perkenalan adalah tempat sembunyi

Meski kau lebih memilih berdiri

Ingatlah pembukaan itu

:Setiap kali beranjak

Tak ada yang lebih kudambakan selain rahim ibu:

[dityansubagja]

o·ver·ture n

1. an orchestral piece at the beginning of an opera, suite, play, oratorio, or other extended composition.

an independent orchestral composition in one movement.

2. an introduction to something more substantial.

3. an approach or proposal made to someone with the aim of opening negotiations or establishing a relationship.

[thenightling]

The optimistic way of looking at Sandman: The Wake... or the semi-hidden Sandman:  Encore

Warning: Posting this on broken / less than three hours sleep.  I need a nap.  Anyway, here we go…

We all know and accept that by the end of the original Sandman comics Morpheus no longer wanted to be Dream of The Endless.   He wanted to be free of his title but unlike Lucifer he couldn’t just up and leave.   He needed an heir.   And he needed to die.

Now, let us say he did die. Many of the entities of long-term or collective dreams within The Dreaming have sentience / self-awareness.    The Corinthian, Merv, Lucien, and even Cain, Abel, and Eve.   We also know the souls of the dead can be transformed into dream entities, such as Morpheus’ ravens like Matthew.

And I cannot ignore the old mantra of “It’s never just a dream.”   

In the epilogue of The Sandman: The Wake, Sunday Morning.  (issue 73 of The Sandman) Hob (Morpheus’ immortal friend) dreams of his deceased friend.  He dreams of Morpheus and of Destruction but he does not know of Morpheus’ personal connection to Destruction.  He only knows the man (Destruction) as a random pavement artist he saw once.  

Hob is an immortal.  Morpheus had a great impact upon him.   He is going to recurrently dream of Morpheus for a long, long, long time.   That indicates to me only one possibility.  Daniel brought Morpheus back as a dream entity. 

Yes, many people dream of the dead and it’s often just an illusion but what makes this one different is how Hob dreams the connection between Morpheus and Destruction without having any previous knowledge of their connection.   And remember, “It’s never just a dream.” 

Morpheus is walking away with Destruction… of The Endless.  Morpheus is no longer “Of The Endless.”  Being an aspect of Dream of the Endless- that may been destroyed.  As Dream of The Endless perhaps he was destroyed.  Yet Destruction is embracing his other half, if not creation than of transformation.   

You either change or you die so why not both?

 Let’s say Morpheus became a posthumous dream entity.  Now free of the burden of being Dream of The Endless, Morpheus may do as he wishes.  By technicality he is dead.  As Dream of the Endless he is dead.  As A dream, however, he is free.