me: oh boy i cant wait to finish all these artfights and upload my wips and stickers onto patreon and do all the end of month responsibilities in a timely manner-
the rock producing kidney thats been dropping hints for the last week and their friend uterus explosion:
they came home to me and i jumped up, pranced around them in orbit.
they stood before me and asked if love was enough, i asked for what - the continuation was if love was enough at all. if i cared.
i didn't know what to make of that. i didn't have a way to prove it.
not necessarily spoilers below cut, it's just for length reasons. i mean yeah its spoilers but like they call me the leaker and guy who likes to over explain
when i wrote my first book, i declared my heart was filled only with water and salt, but i had a full set of ten hearts and it was all theirs. i existed because of them. my heart learned to carve their names into itself, a form of ownership. i exist because they loved me back.
when they found my second book, i never asked what they learned about it. what their takeaway was. i wrote and explained my feelings, the overhwelming sensation of being a supposedly living person. it wasn't clearly sorted.
someone else found the third book before they got the chance to see it, i got the reassurance that i'd have their company if i so asked. eventually, my teammates read it and cemented a home just for us. the book was my desperation for their company, rewritten across fifteen pages over and over.
if they didn't want me, i could leave, all they had to do was say the word. their other option, i wrote, was to kill me. put me out of my distress and reclaim my life as theirs still. killing me would've been love, they know. they didn't though; took me home, spilled their hearts right back at me.
i flew across the map, looking in circles for the common places where we'd be. three, four, five times, and i sat at home and gave up. i waited until they came back. we talked, i had no answer, i was killed, standing in helmet and boots, and i died and i died.
i respawned, there's nothing to worry about. Eris picked up my things, there was nothing lost. they were asking me things that didn't really go through to me, i was stuck. frozen. i'm not alive, nor really an individudal, catered extension of the sea given sentinence moulded to hold their hands. you can't ask a parasite to unlatch its host and fend for themselves. beyond the saltwater, tangibly I am only useless bone and poison. there is nothing but poison if you want an answer removed from me. i'm all spikes and spines that i cannot craddle them close to me with.
they kill me five times before recalling i can move instead of anxiously twiddle my thumbs and stand there uselessly. i asked if they wanted to kill me and the answer was "is it?" i don't know how to give them what they want, i don't know what they want. they asked me if i gave them an answer just because it was what they wanted to hear. i couldn't have. I can't prove to them that I love them, time spent waiting for them and commiserating in not tangible. my little adventures are solely done because i could not bare being alone, but how could they know that?
they asked if i was impacted, at all. nothing i did up to this point could have proven that i was, if over 70 pages wasn't enough. if all the resources i brought back wasn't enough to keep them safe and allow them the freedom to do whatever they wanted. how could i prove this while drunken on fear that rattled my hearts in my hotbar? i didn't understand? the kills were not done as proclamations of love.
i did what was easiest to explain. there was no place for me here, you're asking me for my feelings on something that hasn't quite reached my head yet. i can't show you any further that i care because i don't know how, what i am and what i've done never mattered this much before.
i grabbed three carts, a rail and an arrow and bow with my pickaxe. i burrowed away so killing myself wouldn't descreate your creation made of love. blocked up the tunnel so you couldn't reach me. i died and i spawned back because i didn't break the bed properly. i broke it, you killed me one last time and suddenly, I was at spawn. my death was as foretold in the first book, it will be as if i never existed. the base was fine and i do not bleed.
i die and i die. "home is where the heart is," you said, and we all knew what that meant. i didn't really have the heart to safely make it back, the willpower really. four was enough to survive, i just couldn't bring myself to. down to three, you caught up and found me boating near spawn and i continued down the river. die again and respawn on top of the sigil with a blind jump because i couldn't see the ground from way up high, much less my teammates who were already there. i'm at two and already dropped another 15 pages, withdraw one heart, make it quick.
they can have your hearts, it's all theirs, nothing is ever yours. you asked them if this is what they wanted and they said no, and it ultimately comes down to you and your ego. you receive another frantic message from the only other person awake and opt to ignore it. they wanted to know if you loved them? they believed you didn't care about them? let it be shown how disposable you are and that you cannot exist without them. who gives a shit about who you are, you were honest and they didn't believe you and you are not alive enough to prove it otherwise. you've yet to ever be wrong in your line of reasoning, you're right, objectively. you drop some coords to the messily scrawled book you dropped and jump off.
all things considered, it could be worse. this was one of few times you've used your agency for yourself. you argue some, sorry to the one other person online who suffered as collateral damage. then you bargain some, in the afterlife, to prolong your stay and put it under the excuse of wanting to keep your agency. you were in control in the end. you knew what you were doing. it fueled your pride. you could've made it worse.
you're nothing but poison, you cannot love safely at any closer than a distance. you've been called kind three times, once by your team, twice by the only two people who wanted to know you. it's not true, you have a pride and you demanded those who can breathe and create to take your hearts and live, do something good and beautiful with those that you cannot. you work like machination, you can crawl out and make it back, it's all you do. you'll come back and continue gathering resources for your team. you've always been right about this.
He said the detention facility was a template for what he'd like to do nationwide.
"We'd like to see them in many states," Trump said.
Trump has spoken admiringly of vast, isolated prisons built by El Salvador, and his administration has held some migrants at the Guantanamo Bay naval base, in Cuba, best known for housing foreign terrorism suspects following the September 11, 2001, attacks on the United States.
— Trump tours 'Alligator Alcatraz' as he pushes for more deportations | Reuters | July 1, 2025
It's an unholy hell site built by cruel and sadistic people in power to assault and torture the vulnerable and marginalized for political points. History is repeating itself, and we need more than just drastic changes in law.
proposition for the life series community: drawing exclusively period accurate fanart. i'm letting my 2011 self channel through me and nobody can stop it.
“Women don’t have rights in Iran, they are homophobic in Iran!”
A black woman’s dying body was used to incubate a fetus because the state said so and the Supreme Court, regurgitating debunked talking points, ruled that trans kids could be denied gender affirming care that is proven to save lives. Does that justify a foreign power bombing New Jersey indiscriminately? Like some of y’all don’t give a fuck about LGBTQ Iranians or women in that country because I never saw a people get free through just having their shit blown up
this fourth of july, instead of celebrating a country whose wannabe-dictator president is funding and fueling genocide, essentially building concentration camps, among a myriad of other awful things, please consider supporting any of the following: