Does anyone else's brain hurt right now?
I didn't anticipate at all how stressful seeing my icon turned into a cone would be.
When I first signed up I set my page to explicit cuz of my dirty mouth and erotic art reblogs but I never expect i would be slut shamed in front of the whole world for it now. I don't really know what I expected after reading @staff 's posts beyond, "well that doesn't sound too bad"... oh how naive I still am after all these years walking the earth.
I'm also a pretty neurotic person so one thing that is bothering me is the mere thought that all the "normals" are laughing at anyone with a stupid cone icon. That they assume we are all some sort of deviants thereby making those with their icon pic intact automatically better than us cone faces.
I stress about this but I know it isn't true. No one is better than me and I am better than no one.
Sure I have spent hours enjoying primo porn and erotica on this site, but does that make me a terrible person? For some, yes yes it does. For others they might think I'm overreacting cuz technically in their world I'm still pretty vanilla.
But my porn intake being fucked with isn't really what has me high level stressed today. It's the fact that people I follow, who share much more of themselves with followers in their altrusitc attempts to show their humanity, humanity that is often left out in mainstream media and life, are being bullied by this crap algorithm.
My cyber friend's post op top surgery gets flagged and denied when they try to fight it. A blog I respect for sharing loving stories of gay "daddies" and their "sons" gets hacked to shreds because posts of two shirtless men hugging lovingly are too much to handle I guess.
I can find my amateur porn fix elsewhere but the intimate journeys of people unlike myself, their personal struggles and hope to help others is why I'm suffering. My empathy is in overload thinking that trans folk, all my queer folk, are being targeted. That the @staff made this sweet post about not removing everything and supporting LGBTQ but in actuality they don't give a fuck at all. That their saccharine post was just placation for the "normals". To keep all the vanilla users happy and thinking they are safer without those dangerous sex blogs all the while not realizing they are shunning their queer siblings in the effort.
And yes "normals" we are your queer siblings. We exist in this world together, we have the potential to learn from one another, to care for each other, to offer help and advice in spite of having different gender identities or sexualities.
To be honest, I'm feeling like a jilted lover in a way. At times I hope that Tumblr suffers after leaving us the way it did, with a shitty text full of flowery words that makes them seem like a good person for ending it so "nicely" when, in reality, it's still a text message breakup bereft of any real emotion but even worse cuz ut was a mass text they sent to all their side peuecws at once!!! Couldn't even send a private message with an explanation huh pink? Coukent even drop my personal items at the house, gonna put it in a box outside or leave it with a friend who looks at me like I'M the one who ducked up when really it's your greedy ass who thinks they came up cuz your sugar daddy (aka Apple) told you your special and you believed it
