not your ordinary cuppa

some sort of an adult or something. still fucked up at 28, but trying. she/hers

[toskarinfr]

must feel good as fuck to curse a prince for being rude to you while you were larping as an old woman for no reason

[replicated]

i'm not really into blondes but this is an objectively absurd connection to make

[peachfromcmbyn]

In order to be properly non-pedophilic you have to want to fuck somebody old but not with gray or white hair because that's too close to blonde which as we've established is the hair color of children. So ideally somebody old as fuck but bald. And obviously wanting to have sex with a man is misogynistic so it has to be a woman. And it can't be a white woman because that would be racist and it can't be a woman of color because that would be fetishistic, so ideally a woman with some unnatural skin color, oh let's say, purple. But it can't be an alien, because we don't know anything about alien life cycles so it could be an alien child or an alien that looks like a child. So it has to be an animal from Earth, but obviously one of human level intelligence that can communicate is otherwise that would be bestiality. So an old purple female animal that can speak English. I think the only creature you can be hot for is the Ant Queen from A Bug's Life.

[kholdseid]

[septemberequinox]

casual survey: reblog if you want to kiss a girl right now

[ofwings]

Are you single?

do these look like the posting habits of someone experiencing romance

[deusben]

babe wake up...i need to tell you multiple thoughts that don't corelate at all that i had in the span of five minutes..

[themojavesworst]

*licks finger and tastes the air* my fallout game is about to crash

[the-minster]

these new bots are NOT OK. Them having actual tumblr names is giving me psychic damage. I feel like curling up in a corner and crying.

yesterday "remainingforefinger" followed me and the fact that this ISN'T a nonbinary autist from Poland who works as a dentist's assistant, but A BOT, makes me want to SCREAM.

[weedforcats]

Pour one out for this choice bot url

[burins]

thinking fondly of this meme I made for a coworker years and years ago

[burins]

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

[burntundertones]

[virtualmosshroom]

[hawkpartys]

it must feel good as fuck to walk on the surface tension of water as a bug

[ilovedirt]

T-shirt that reads I STRUGGLE TO INTERACT WITH OTHERS

[oneheadtoanother]

[asneakyfox]

one of my favorite bits in lord of the rings is something the movies didn't really try to do because it's entirely internal, but sam's carrying the ring and it starts trying to do its work on him, so he's having these intrusive visions of himself marching at the head of a vast and terrible army, and he just starts laughing because, me? samwise gamgee? sam gamgee the general sam gamgee the dark lord are you for real? man i just want to go home and do some gardening. and the ring gets frustrated and it starts trying to figure out other stuff that would actually tempt sam and it's finally like, okay, but hear me out: imagine if you could have...A REALLY REALLY BIG GARDEN

[asneakyfox]

and then he's like, i don't know that sounds like a lot more work than a regular garden actually. why don't we just get on with finding mister frodo

[ripempezardexerox]

[catchymemes]

[outofcontextarthur]

[daft-junk-blog]

cities breaking down on a camels back