By sin.xline
DEAR READER
taylor price
Cosimo Galluzzi

JBB: An Artblog!

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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occasionally subtle
art blog(derogatory)
Misplaced Lens Cap

tannertan36
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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#extradirty
tumblr dot com
will byers stan first human second

JVL
wallacepolsom

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dirt enthusiast
🪼
seen from T1
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seen from United States
seen from Ukraine
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seen from United States
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seen from Malaysia
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@earliestest
By sin.xline
"there is no personal space when it comes to vet med" idk if you mean with owners or pets but I FEEL THAT I work in hospitality not vet care but people will fucking walk within a foot of me to ask questions and I'm like bro. Please. Personal space???
Oh no, worse than that. Sometimes you need 2 or even 3 people to help restrain a really hyper dog for something short like a blood draw and there's not a lot of room around a dog for 3 human bodies to fit so your face will be right by someone's butt or your knee might be in someone else's crotch. Or with a small squirmy dog where doc needs to listen to the heart but you need to hold it against your body there's a good chance the stethoscope-holding hand is going to hit your chest.
And sometimes you're holding a dog or cat for an exam and the owner is trying to comfort them by petting them and suddenly they're petting you too (they generally don't realize this)
This happens SO OFTEN
Or YOU'RE the one trying to pet the animal, and accidentally pet the CLIENT instead 😭
Or when the owner doesn't hand you the small dog so you have to reach into their embrace for the dog and are basically guaranteed to accidently cop a feel.
"You can take him!" Or... you could put him on the table so I can get hold of him and not *you*????
a few more:
-client with tiny yorkie tucked IN HER BRA and his foot got stuck and she absolutely could not get him out and he was scratching her and she started crying so yeah...I unhooked the dog's hock from her bra
-my tech was holding a big somewhat aggressive rottie who was, unfortunately, only actually handleable if the client was holding her head. client proceeded to fart. in my tech's face. I felt so bad
-too many cats that velcro onto their human or the tech when you try to examine them so you have to either examine them with their tiny needle claws dug into the human's shoulder (inevitably copping a feel) or having to peel the poor kitty off the person while getting in REAL close and often pulling clothing in very awkward ways
then there's the unfortunate times you need to provide canine sex ed to clients who are not breeders, have no interest in breeding, and had no idea that their neutered dogs could still have sexual reactions. this means I've had to:
-inform one client that his dog was, in fact, sucking himself off (I said it nicer than that; the client's response was, "Oh. oh I'm rather proud of him actually.");
-another that yes, prostate stimulation will cause erections when I was doing a rectal exam and she was really confused about that and then had the revelation about how anal penetration works for men in real time in the exam room;
-and just today, that yes, neutered male dogs will still hump other dogs and can in fact get erections and sometimes you need to lube those penises up and stuff them back in if they won't fix themselves or your dog needs to come in for urgent care. she sighed, looked at her husband, and said, "well, I guess we need to go buy some KY."
vet med is, inevitably, a source of awkward amusement and it never gets old
Vet at work just had an appointment where the owner had their 3 year old kid in the room too. Kiddo was very friendly but with no personal boundaries, frequently touching vet and tech while he was running around the room. Vet thought the kid was just leaning on her but when she looked behind her, he was basically pressing his face into her buttcrack through her pants. Vet left the room beet red and the tech in the room was laughing her ass off
Today a client held my hand, which i was currently using to restrain the dogs head during the exam. Sir. Please let go. My hand does NOT feel like your dog.
Today, while I was restraining a bitey little dog snugly against my chest the owner decided she wanted to hug him to comfort him. So she held him around his chest. Which was currently against my chest. So the back of her hand was squished between her dog and my boobs.
Later, she thanked me for being so gentle with her bitey dog and did so while placing her hand on the small of my back. And she kept it there. For an entire minute. While I was still restraining her dog.
Today while I was restraining a scared small dog the owner tried to reassure her dog by scratching the dog's chest. Which i was holding against my body. So I got some extremely awkward belly scritchies.
Today while restraining a small-ish dog who kept trying to back up out of my grip, the owner asked how she could help. I asked her to brace his rear end.
Which she did! She did do that, but with one hand and the other was more on his flank. Which was against my chest. And she was rubbing her fingers up and down his side to calm him so I got a very gentle, accidental tit massage.
But you know what, the dog stopped panicking so it was worth it.
An owner was holding up the front half of their very friendly, hyper labrador so I could look at a lump on the chest to play "nipple-tick-mass" . I had my hands near the front legs to part the hair and she death-gripped onto my arm.
"Ma'am? That's my arm. That's my arm? You have my arm? Can you let go that's my arm?"
Hey husband had to tell her that she had me and not the dog and she was so embarrassed but good natured about it.
But I'm also like... I naturally have very very little arm hair? My arm does not feel like the leg of a labrador? Why did she not go "hmmn, this textile doesn't seem like a dog texture"???
From Veronica Tucker via Pinterest
The blue highlights on black are a striking combination, it must be said.
五月五日滑铲!
Quand il faut expliquer la pâtisserie à un Américain: imaginez un hamburger
Houndoom
Oh wait the dead husband couldn't possibly be part of that "shitstorm" coming back threefold to bite you in the ass, could it?
they slayed
Prev’s tags significantly added to my experience of this video
“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.
Good Job.
#this post gets me every time
It’s from two days ago fam how many times could there have been
do you think no one else has time travel
Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.
#surprise reblog!!
STOP IT’S BEEN MONTHS. MONTHS!
YOU CAN STOP.
wow if only you had a time machine
this is my favorite custom discord emoji I've ever made. perfect for after a long day at the long day factory.
[ID: transparent PNG of a can of kitten formula (with a beedy-eyed kitten on the label) and a pack of newport menthols /End ID]
pose references from @/blumineck 🏹
I took this picture at work a couple years ago and I've been told it has immense potential as a meme format. Y'all show me what you got
Incredibly violent take of mine but I actually don’t think you need to relate to a story in any way to enjoy it. You can enjoy a story even if you can’t point at a character and insert some aspect of your personality or identity into them. In fact I would argue the need for a character like that to be present in every single story you experience is a sign of stunted growth.
If Halduron Brightwing was a stripper would he call himself “Haldurod Brightwang”?
I heard mentions of "Halduron Brightwing" and "stripper" and had to do it. You know me
Beautiful, you don’t HAVE to forgive them. You just can’t ridicule them after leaving for being “tainted” or “evil” or whatever the acceptable word is now. Do not punish the behaviour you want to see.
“But they should’ve known sooner” and we should’ve known sooner that Destiel was never gonna meaningfully happen outside of queerbaiting, what’s your point?
“I never want them near me” that’s fine, but you do realize to insult them, YOU have to get near THEM, right? Wouldn’t it be more conducive to what you want to just leave each other alone?
“What if one of them tries to approach me?” Then you block them online, or you keep the conversation clinical and polite irl. You do NOT take time out of your day to berate them for their old views. Your mother raised you better than that.
Preserving these tags, they're very correct
I would reblog this one million times if I could
As a matter of fact you can!
This is fundamentally how cults WORK, btw
Villainize outsiders, which can look different depending on the cult, make everything an us vs them situation. And then when those outsiders show themselves to be hostile (doesn't matter why) the cult is proven right all along on one of their foundational messages
This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8
I hate that my aesthetic sense agrees with this but everything you just said was correct
I went back to dig up this post because I was thinking about poetry.
This is one of those non-poem things that are among my favorite poems.
As the OP stated, the use of alliterative consonants is aesthetically just great, especially the placement of the strongest use at the end: “fuck him on the floor.” The use of “chintz” is indeed great word choice.
Because I’m insane, decided to scan the poem:
Not only is the second sentence, indeed, perfect iambic pentameter, the entire poem is perfectly metered, though the first sentence has four iambs rather than five.
There are further things I love about this poem, though: I like the casual connotations of “keep it real” juxtaposed with “chintz.” It causes me to interpret the “chintz” more strongly as meaning something fake, a facade. There is also of course the coarseness of “fuck,” which is a contrast with “chintz” but a different kind of contrast, gutsy and carnal where “chintz” is flimsy and inanimate.
And then there is the storytelling: there is SO MUCH storytelling in just these two lines. To break it down: The speaker is having sex with a married man, in the house he shares with his wife, which is “filled with chintz”—something that here connotes fakeness, in contrast with “keep it real.”
The illicit encounter in the poem takes place within a house filled with facade, the flimsy construction of the wife’s marriage and domestic sphere, but the encounter itself is a taste of something “real.” That’s a story, and it’s just two lines.
This is EIGHTEEN SYLLABLES, y’all. The amount of meaning condensed into these eighteen syllables is stunning, and it is so elegantly done.
From a technical standpoint (and ive taken 300- and 400-level poetry classes so I can say this) this is damn near flawless as a poem.
Kept thinking about this ever since I saw it and had to do something
there's art now
Ah dang to go further; the floor is framed as a refuge. As if there is literally no other space in this house that hasn't been populated by his wife with flimsy inanimate fakery. There is no space for this man in this house save for the floor. There is no space for him on the sofa, oon the counter tops, and most notably, no space for him in the marital bed.
I’d also like to point out the use of the word “has.” The wife has filled the house with chintz. She isn’t filling the house with chintz. She doesn’t fill the house with chintz. She has filled the house with chintz. Use of the past-tense makes the wife a subtly removed element in the story, someone whose presence we see in the environment, but who is blissfully distant during the actors throes of passion. There is an element of physical as well as emotional separation from the wife that is catalyzed by being fucked on the floor. Use of the past tense is an end to the wife presence in the actors life, a carnal catharsis amid cold fragility and emotional distance.
This is my new favourite post in the world
everyone cheer for the one (1) time tumblr had reading comprehension
And, predictably, it's because it was about gay sex