tucker & dale vs evil ( 2010 ) sentence starters
↪ alter as you see fit. trigger warnings for death, suicide mention, sexual themes
“should we be doing this? it’s still a crime scene.”
“we’re in hillbilly country now, boys!”
“i’m in a car full of morons.”
“okay, i stand corrected; you’re a fucking genius.”
“let’s get out of here. this place is so creepy.”
“tell her that you got a vacation home. that’ll probably impress her.”
“you gotta have some faith in yourself, man.”
“you are a good-lookin’ man … more or less.”
“you got a damn good heart.”
“what’s the worst that could happen?”
“ just smile and laugh; it shows confidence.”
“it’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?”
“there ain’t nothing up there but pain and suffering on a scale you can’t even imagine.”
“he was probably jealous he can’t afford a place of his own.”
“chubby’s chili dog depot? buy three, get two free. no expiration date.”
“if you have a reoccurring dream about sucking a dick but never do it, are you gay?”
“who wants to go skinny dipping?”
“i’m glad that we have this chance to get to know each other better.”
“please don’t cut me open!”
“oh! it’s the pancakes! you hate pancakes!”
“well, it was really dark, but it looked like one of the guys was … like … eating her face off.”
“we don’t need the police.”
“we can handle this on our own.”
“please don’t tell me that you hate eggs and bacon.”
“some people just aren’t any good in a crisis.”
“i never really had much fashion sense, anyway.”
“he looks mean, but he’s just a big old marshmallow.”
“do you like board games?”
“just shut up and walk, bitch.”
“you have serious issues, you know that?”
“my face is as hot as a haemorrhoid.”
“some kid, he just hucked himself right into the wood chipper!”
“these kids are coming out here, and killing themselves all over the woods.”
“'oh, hidey-ho, officer. we’ve had a doozy of a day. there we were, minding our own business, doing some chores around the house, when kids started killing themselves all over my property.’”
“you guys are all a bunch of fucking pussies, you know that? i mean, a few little tiny murders … and everyone just freaks out.”
“you must think that I’m some kind of moron to believe a story like that.”
“i’m not blaming this on her, I’m blaming this on you!”
“did i hurt your feelings? i’m sorry.”
“they cut off his bowlin’ fingers!”
“i should have known that if a guy like me talked to a girl like you, somebody’d end up dead.”
“i never thought I’d say this, but i’m glad i’m not hung like a bear.”
“wait! how about i make some tea, and we all sit and talk this out?”
“oh, i love earl grey. that’s great.”
“i would totally love a cup of tea right now.”
“okay, well … first of all … i am really sorry that your family got massacred.”
“i’m gonna shove my boot down his fuckin’ throat.”
“that was just not a very nice apology kiss.”
“it’s true, [name]. you’re half hillbilly.”
“look what else i got you. a bendy straw, your favourite sipping utensil.”
“i had a great time. i mean, except for all the people dying, when they were bleeding on us and everything. that wasn’t so much fun.”