eden's askblog

run by edendawg :)) pfp by rockyracetrack

[edendawg]

eden!! he's so joyous!!

kofi

[edendawg]

Eden: You know man, it's fine you keep inviting her over here to chill with us, but she's constantly eating your face

Ezekiel: I dunno what you're talking about we hardly do that much PDA

Gwen, with Ezekiel's cheek bewteen her teeth: .eyeah aye dunno whaht Ur talhkinh abhouht eethdenh

[edendawg]

eden and indigo cruising through walmart high as balls trying to locate pretzels and dip

[edendawg]

So, I've been teasing the Bullville writing stuff for far too long, and the only way I'm gonna get the gumption to start the second chapter might just be to post the first already. when I set up my ao3 more I'll add this there, but, here it is! I'm not asking for critique, as I plan on running more edits before I post it on ao3 but you will at least get the gist

CW: mentions of su*c*de, substance use, childhood neglect

Eden and Indigo at the skatepark (untitled as of rn)

It’s autumn, the dried up leaves coat much of the skatepark in Bullville, but most of them have been swept into the field by wind and what’s left on the concrete is all ripped and crinkled. The clouds tell of a rainy overnight ahead, but the sun is high in the sky right now.

The skatepark is empty except for two backpacks, a dog, his skateboard, a ferret, and their rollerskates. “So what are we still doing here?” questions the ferret, Indigo, to Eden, a twiggy, fluffy malamute.

“The hell you mean dawg? You’re not thinking of ending it are you?” he replies, concerned.

“Nah dude, I’m just talking about Bullville, like, what’s wrong with us? Why’re we still choosing to live here?”

“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with us, people get stuck here, it’s like a curse,” Eden chuckles out, and crosses his arms, “If you were raised here, you’re fucked. If even one of your parents was raised here? You’re completely doomed.”

“Eden, I don’t remember, were your parents raised here?”

“Yeah, they both went to the tech school, so my mom is from Bullville and my dad is from Smithfield.”

“Shit man, well, my parents are both from Massachusetts and moved to Bullville cause it was cheap to buy a house when they got married, it’s a reasonable commute from both their main spots.”

“Yeah no, I didn’t leave this valley for the first 15 years of my life besides to go up to Boston for two Sox games. I don’t even like baseball! My dad just seriously thought it would fix our relationship or something. That’s what my last therapist said at least.” Eden quickly shakes his rolled up long sleeves down his arms and then crosses them tight around his chest. “I only started branching out more because of when I started making friends with people older than me. Most of them really did just want me to have a better childhood even though I was a little too far gone to save.”

“I’m glad some of those people were good for you, and I remember the baseball game stories. He drove you home in the dark while plastered that first time, right? He would’ve the second time too if it wasn’t for your mom secretly following you to the stadium.” Indigo squints a little to see Eden’s eyes going glassy.

“Yeah, and we picked up the other car the next day while my parents were screaming. Y’know, I’m convinced the friend of his he always met there was one of his dealers. Something about him. It was too long ago for me to remember some of the details now though.”

“I can see you getting all stressed thinking about him, let’s circle back, why do you think you’re still here?”

“Well, I know I could probably afford to move elsewhere at this point, or at least save up to in a reasonable amount of time, but I just feel a connection to a lot of the other things here besides my family. The local nature spots, the good cities aren’t that far away, I know a lot of other good people here obviously. What about you?”

“The people and nature for sure… I dunno, I feel like a lot of the folks we still know in town would say similar stuff to you honestly. Like, it’s just convenient really. My friends, my job, my happy places, they’re basically all here. But since you mentioned the city, any ideas of stuff to do in Providence soon?”

“I’m not really sure. I really am trying to save money so I might just hit up a coffee shop and hang out for a few hours… Try to get some writing done or something. Just to get out of the normal cycle.”

“I knew it. You couldn’t swear off the pen! … That’s it, that’s why we’re all still here! Eden, you and I have been in some form of creative writing club together since I was a sixth grader. It’s the author and poet in all of us. I dunno, we just can’t stop writing. Especially about our love/ hate relationship with this place”

“You really think that’s it?”

“Okay, hear me out, what’s better to write about than a shitty hometown in a beautiful often melancholic manner? I mean, sure we could be off living some better life, but we can just write that too.”

“You’ve seen my work, it’s all just whatever, sometimes it’s about my dreams. Like my actual dreams and also my goals and aspirations? Or it’ll be just a really mediocre but piercingly toned heart stab of a poem. Nothing to write home about, it just makes me feel better.”

“I like when you read the ones about your hopes and dreams and stuff!” Indigo pauses to watch as Eden starts fiddling with his skateboard, rolling it back and forth like he’s itching to skip out on whatever endeavors his friend is going to dare suggest he pursue. “I do really think you could do pro skating, I watch YouTube and you’re just as good if not better than some of those skaters. Still, I don’t think that diminishes your worth as a writer either dude. You write some crazy stuff that sticks with me, heavy, I hope you’ll read again in the next meeting now that you’re actually hitting pen to pad for real!”

“I'm glad you and some of the others have been enjoying my work and helping me workshop it. I definitely feel a lot more confident than I did, it's just hard to grasp that I'm good at stuff that's all. And while I know I'm pretty not bad at skateboarding, I'm just not sure if I'm good enough to try and work towards going pro. I feel like I'm late to the game anyhow.”

“I don't think that really matters, you've got a lot of talent. I love skating with you not only for spending time doing something we like together, but watching you is so fun. I don't even know what the names of half those tricks you do are.”

“If I'm being honest I don't know the names of some of the tricks either. I just do what I think will look cool a lot of the time.”

“I'd say at least try and figure out how you could start showing off your skills. Like do you have those skate clips we've been taking? you could put those online and see if people get into it.”

“Hmm,” Eden sighed, “I don't know if anyone will really care that much, but maybe.”

“I think it's worth a shot Eden, seriously.”

...

plastered my name

in graffiti, made

skid marks on

concrete, pulled

myself back from

the dead and

flipped in the air

on my board.

i’ll make it some day

i’ll be someone,

some way; the life

i lead now is in

search of something

bigger, brighter

only trying smarter,

harder every time i

drop in

- Eden

[edendawg]

this is what happens when my autism, adhd, depression, and anxiety all bonk me at The Same Time

dont steal or claim my work, but this sticker is funny af so you can bring it to your server if u want

[edenoffthewall]

me rn

[edenoffthewall]

hey eden! happy new year! what did you do to celebrate?

haply new year dude! i stayed in for most of the night until i heard fireworks were gonna be set off in town, then i went to the hill that’s not too far from the skatepark and i got blasted and cheered and jumped around like a madman until people started giving me looks lmao

hope your new year is great! i plan on trying to be a better guy this year, and work more on my writing. we shall see how i do on that second one

[edenoffthewall]

hai eden !!! how did you start working at zumies? do you enjoy it? what would you rather be doing if you dont?

howdy, thanks for the question homie!

I started working at Zumiez like a couple years ago, they were my second job (I was a banquet server before that) and they mostly just cared that I was competent and liked skating.

I enjoy it enough, it's retail hell, but it's my retail hell, and at least it's something I care about a bit.

if it were up to me, I'd be a pro skater. I make skate clips and stuff but I never post them anywhere, idk. it would be cool to go pro tho if I work up the confidence. if that doesn't work out I'll see you at the plaza or at the park! thanks again for the question, take care dawg