I never thought I could feel so alone, surrounded by family. Everything hurts so bad and I just want this all to be over. It kills me that I am always accomidating for them, schedules, abscences, tardys, excuses. I NEVER ask for anything and I’m just so tired of no one of my family ever wanting to spend genuine time with me, but yet can accomidate other minsecule parties, activities etc. So on MY special day is it so much for me to be selfish and want them all there. After constant reminders for 6 consecutive months I get the news from my brother my nieces will not be attending due to an after school reviews. After constant badgering and begging for months and empty promises I’m presented with. Mom keeps on saying, “but I will be there”. As much as I appreciate her support and love her to pieces, it ultimately doesn’t fix this. My family always has to complain, and make so many excuses, when all I want is for them to actualy WANT to be there, and not feel as if I’m forcing them to be. It kills me my nieces who have been so excited will not be there. All they say is we support you, when all I feel is it is empty lies... what should I’ve expected, its been like this ever since I can remember. The only people who are actually willing to take off of work,and come from miles away for me are my friends.... and it just makes me so sad if someone non-blood related is willing to do this for me, then my family should with out a moments hesitation be willing to do the same. I’m so hurt, angry, and just so disapointed. I don’t even want to go, I just want this to be all over, so my incovienceince to everyone in the world will just blow over. I just want to be alone, and forget this whole family, and how much they may never know what hurt me. Because of them there are ongoing problems, because of them I have to go above and beyond, and because of them I will neve know what its like o have undying love and geniune support.
origamiaround
germansingergirl
prguitarman
