you & i

+ my name is elijah and i blog about stuff. sometimes, when i'm awake.

[suicideisquad]

[bronsontbh]

"She’s just getting comfy," Bronson replied with a grin. He reached over and ran his fingers along her back softly, then pulled away. "She’s loving this, y’know." He looked up at Elijah and smiled at him, then back down at Ella. "No loud sirens, just a comfy chest to lay on." He let his head roll back against the wall and a small sigh escaped him. He chuckled at Elijah’s remark. "A little bear. Yeah, I guess I could see that. Vicious, just like a bear. I mean, look at her." He turned his head and opened one eye. "She’s plotting her attack."

Bronson’s eyes widened at Elijah’s retort, and although he was smiling, he was sitting up and hushing him. “Hey hey hey, watch the uckfay-” Bronson laughed, using the pig Latin form of the word. “And I am not delusional, thank you.” He settled into his spot again, his eyebrows just a tad furrowed because did Elijah just call Bronson cute? He didn’t think much of it. Elijah was a… an affectionate guy. “Uh, I mean- I can take her, if you want.” Bronson sat up and turned to Elijah. He slowly moved his hands to each side of Ella, being careful as he tried to pick her up, but a whimper in protest told him otherwise. “Or not. The princess doesn’t like being moved, apparently.”

[elijah-sharp]

"Are you calling me fat?" Elijah's face looked a lot more offended than he actually was, because he was mostly just joking with Bronson now. he knew that the boy was practically dead, and that just messing with him would be kind of funny. "Oh, I know. She's so wild," He looked down at the blob on his chest, knowing that she was fast asleep in her own little two month old mind, not giving a fuck about anything. "I hope she likes me." His words were pretty sincere, actually hoping that she got some sort of physical connection that Bronson would see and figure to be as something special.

Elijah rolled his eyes playfully, smiling as he did so before looking at the boy next to him and gently starting to bounce Ella-- but definitely not enough to wake her up. "Chill, she's asleep, and she's definitely not anywhere close to talking. If she was three, I wouldn't say it." Elijah could tell that Bronson really just wanted to get to bed, so he was just going to hand Ella back over until he heard the protests and looked at Bronson, smiling to himself as he gazed into the boy's eyes. "You're completely whipped." His whispered, settling back into his spot on the wall, rubbing Ella's back. "It's cute-- you're cute." His tone turned down as he spoke the last words, nodding a little bit and not planning to look up anytime soon.

[wesley-hughes]

Wesley hadn’t realized how pathetic of a state he was in until he walked into the bathroom and saw himself in the mirror, because he was covered in paint. Like, from head-to-toe— he literally had a spot of blue in his hair, which actually looked kind of cool, but it definitely couldn’t stay there forever. So he stripped down and stepped into the shower, letting the warm water wash over him and rinse all of the paint away. He hoped that Elijah wasn’t looking at any of the paintings out in his room, because he didn’t want the boy to see any of the ideas that he had in mind for his gift. He wanted it to be a surprise, so it would be more special. After a few minutes of thinking about life and getting distracted by all of the colors mixing together as they went down the drain, Wesley decided that he was clean enough and didn’t want to keep Eli waiting too long, so he shut off the water and hopped out of the shower. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he shook some of the water out of his hair and stepped back into his bedroom and saw Elijah crawling around on the floor, and he couldn’t have been more confused. “What are you doing?” He asked, concern in his voice, because it looked as though he had lost something. Thinking even deeper, he looked over at the terrarium by his bed and his eyes widened when he only saw one of his little green pets. “Eli, where’s Lily?” Wes questioned, this time rushing over to where the boy was on the floor. “Please tell me you didn’t lose my fucking frog, Elijah.” He pleaded, turning so he was looking into the boy’s eyes, genuinely scared that Lily was gone and he’d never see her again. 

[elijah-sharp]

Okay, so maybe he didn't completely lose the frog, but she wasn't really in sight and she was loose, so it was quite a potential. But what was more important to him was the fact that Wesley had small hips that were a lot more narrow than the upper part of his body that was extremely broad and large and much bigger than Elijah altogether. Yeah, it was important to him to look at the boy with large eyes as he sat on the floor and tried to remember why Wes had such a pleading face and why he looked do worried. It was because Elijah screwed up. "I didn't lose her," He mumbled out, shaking his head a little bit as he started to crawl around the side of the bed, looking to see where she had gone. Elijah bent over to look under the bed, highly aware that his ass was full frontal to his friends view before sitting down on his feet and biting at his lip. "She isn't gone. She's here somewhere, okay? I didn't even do anything! I just opened up the terrarium and she jumped out, practically. Okay, maybe I was holding her and she jumped away, but I couldn't remember which one you said was friendlier." Elijah shrugged a little bit, sighing out before looking at Wes with a very sorry expression. "Don't hate me."

[bronsontbh]

Oh, definitely. I’d never just… take a giant box of diapers from you. If I need an emergency Target run, I’ll let you know. This is your first job? You’ll like it. I mean, I’ve never really worked in retail. Just this Chinese restaurant and I know the owners. And then there’s like, private piano lessons but yeah, never retail. Can’t be all that bad, right? It’s a good starting job.

[elijah-sharp]

Alright, sweet. You know I'll always help. Um, I hate it so far, but I'll take your word for it! I don't interact well with people, so being somewhere where I actually need to help people is probably the worst possible job for me. Like, there are signs above the isles for reasons, you know? Don't fucking ask me where the microwaves are because your best bet is going to be just as good as mine. People these days are fucking stupid.

[elijah-sharp]

[bronsontbh]

Bronson laughed and watched Ella stir. “Yeah, she’s squirmy. Especially when she’s awake. It’s a lot of-” He kicked out his feet into the hallway and glanced at Elijah, smiling at him. “It’s like she just found her feet.” He brought his legs back closer to him, crossing them Indian-style. “It’s weird, definitely.” His eyes shifted to Ella and he shook his head softly. A short laugh exited his lips. “Picture her smaller. I was genuinely terrified I was gonna break her when I held her for the first time.”

He admired Elijah. Bronson liked how sure Elijah was of himself, how he did shit for himself and didn’t care what others thought. It was like he lived his life purely to be happy, and it was admirable. He turned to Elijah as he tried shifting Ella in his arms. He furrowed his eyebrows in the slightest. “Yeah, uh- here.” Bronson turned and took Elijah’s hand, placing it under Ella to support her better. “There you go. She sleeps all curled up.” He moved his hand from Elijah and grinned at him before letting a yawn escape him. “You sure you’re not tired? I can take her if you wanna just… go to bed. I understand.”

[elijah-sharp]

"Squirmy like a worm." Elijah chuckled, watching Bronson's feet just kick into the hallway before letting a few more chuckles escape. "She did just find her feet. Like, two months ago." He looked down at the baby again, picturing what Bronson told him to. It was pretty amazing how something was actually that small and would turn into a person like everyone else. She had her own personality and mind built into her, but she just needed to grow up now. It was pretty impressive how nature worked, he thought. Inside, he hoped that Ella would be happy with herself, unlike himself.

When he felt Bronson's hands on him, the blush spread across his cheeks as he just formed into the mold he was made into. "She's like a little bear or something." He looked down at the little face she was making, grinning down at her as he did so. "She's so cute." His voice was a whisper before he turned and heard the yawn. "Shut the fuck up, Bronson." He laughed, figuring how hypocritical the boy actually was. "I'm not even kidding, if you don't go to bed in the next ten minutes, I'm stealing Ella from you forever. Go get some fucking sleep. You're delusional and way cuter than you usually are, but it's not," He paused, realizing how stupid he was for even saying that Bronson was cute before he just looked away and shrugged a bit. "Um, I mean, maybe you can take Ella since she's practically asleep. I mean, yeah. I'll go back to sleep, too." Something inside him just hoped that Bronson was too tired to catch onto it.

[bronsontbh]

Oh, you don’t have to do that, Elijah. I’m sure your employees know me by name, though. I was there at like, three in the morning when Ella was just a few weeks old. Emergency formula run. Remember when I said I have no dignity? I was in pajamas. Eight thirty kinda sucks. But at least you’re making money, right?

[elijah-sharp]

I mean, I don't have a lot of money, so I'd obviously make you pay me back, but I could pick some up for you. It's not really a big deal. Takes a whole lot of your energy to find someone to watch Ella when you could just stay home, and I'll bring them to you. Yeah, I don't get paid until August 1st, which kind of sucks. This is the first job I've ever had. Kind of nice, though. Meeting new people is kind of cool.

[bronsontbh]

Bronson smiled a bit at Elijah’s compliment, his eyes shifting to the baby. Sure, his and Faith’s relationship was a toxic one, one that didn’t end well, but it did result in a beautiful child. He wouldn’t deny that. Faith was a beautiful girl. He nodded in agreement, watching as Ella stirred a bit in Elijah’s arms. “She’s just complaining,” Bronson reassured him with a smile. “She won’t tell you, but she’s cranky as hell.” A laugh escaped him and he nodded slowly. “You lose a lot of dignity when you get your girlfriend pregnant.”

"But it’s kind of like… I don’t care, y’know? Like- I go out in public with her, and," He looked down Ella, "I used to think like, oh shit. All these people are like, judging me. But I don’t care. There’s no point in caring.” He shrugged. He sat up a bit and examined the way Elijah was holding Ella. “Nah, just- yeah, support her a bit.” He sat back again. “She’s all curled up against you. Maybe she’s got a new favorite person.”

[elijah-sharp]

"It's true." Elijah watched the boy's smile grow as he nodded a little bit. It wasn't that he was hiding his crush for Bronson, but he knew what kind of baggage it all came with. There were certain things he would need to bring to the table, and he wasn't ready for that yet. Nor was he sure that Bronson even liked him like that, which would obviously be a really key factor. "She really moves," He laughed a little, looking down at the baby and hearing small coos before letting the smile grow even further. "It's weird, isn't it? I mean, I'm sure you know, but like, how something this small is even... alive. Like, she's just so innocent and perfect." The words were a little ramble, but they were soft and meaningful as he stroked at the baby's head and felt the softness of her fine hair. 

"I understand that. You can't care. It's like," He shrugged his shoulders a little more. "I like wearing makeup in public. Do people look at me? Of course they do. But I can't care, because I'm making myself happy. That makes me happy-- Ella makes you happy." His words, again, were soft and muttered, but they were heavily sincere for how the boy felt. "Support her?" He question, pulling her up a little bit and holding onto her back and head more. "Like that?" A smile crossed his face when Bronson spoke, and Elijah just wanted to jump around and scream about how he wanted to be someone's favorite person, but instead he bit his lip and just kept quiet.

[httpgrande]

Did anyone ask you for the kitchen appliances?

[elijah-sharp]

Worse. They asked for office supplies. Like, fuck you and your fucking home office that you're probably mocking me with. Sorry, I'm just a little peeved that I'm not rich yet.

[bronsontbh]

Aw, Elijah. Is it really that bad? I mean, I like Target over Walmart. You could be working at Walmart. You guys sell diapers at a pretty good price, that’s something to take pride in.

[elijah-sharp]

... Oh god, that's true. It's still a retail store that sucks major ass. Wow, really? Maybe if you're lucky I'll bring some home for you. I get thirty percent off everything, so that's kind of nice. But I still have to get up at eight thirty every morning. Ew.

[durjayporter-blog]

Ouch. Blogging not carrying you financially anymore?

[elijah-sharp]

It's not coming in fast enough. It depends on how well my blog post goes and I can't rely on that anymore or I'll be broke. I just kind of like having a little extra money in my pocket. It also makes my mom happy knowing that I actually have some sort of job that doesn't include the internet.

[elijah-sharp]

Welcome to fucking Target. Ask me where the kitchen appliances are and I'll stab you. I got a fucking day-job to buy stuff and my life sucks. This is actually the worst this imaginable. Oh my god.

[wesley-hughes]

"Yeah, like, you’ve got the colored hair and now the piercing. It could be a new look for you." Wesley didn’t know why Elijah smiled so hard when he made the comment, because he was being completely serious, but seeing the smile on the boy’s face made him giggle. "I think I do know, plus I follow your blog. I know basically everything about you, Elijah." he commented, raising his brow at the boy laying across from him. Laying there and talking with the boy made Wes so happy, because it had been a while since he’d seen Elijah, but it was like nothing had changed and they were still as close as ever. “‘Cause I was really tired and I didn’t feel like it! Plus, I usually take long showers. I like to think while I’m conditioning." he explained with a laugh. "I don’t like to think about that, though. In my world, no one dies and everything is happy. Don’t ruin it." Wesley said innocently, because he liked to believe that it was true. "You totally can, but please don’t drop them or anything. Kermit’s the darker one and he’s a lot friendlier than Lily, just so you know." he laughed at the thought of Elijah squealing just trying to grab of one of the animals from their container. Getting up from the bed and running a hand through his hair, Wesley  looked at the boy as if he were crazy. "Of course I have, Eli! Only a few times, though, because you’re not really supposed to bathe them in tap water. They’re tropical animals, though, so they love the rain." he shrugged as he pulled his stained shirt off and threw it into the corner before turning back to the purple-haired boy. "Make yourself at home, just don’t leave the terrarium lid off and don’t touch any wet paintings." he requested before grabbing a towel off of the floor and making his way to the shower. 

[elijah-sharp]

"You follow my blog?" Elijah asked quickly. It wasn't really surprising, but he was just kind of flattered that people read his blog all the time. There wasn't any reason for anyone to feel obligated to do it, especially if they were friends. He didn't want them to feel guilty for not. It was just some people's tastes. Wes and him and hadn't had a good talk for a while, and they definitely needed to catch up, but Elijah couldn't bare to watch the boy lay in his own filth any longer, even if his hair did look incredibly cute with the bedhead, and yes, his arms looked amazing in the tank top he was wearing, as well. When Wes stood up, Elijah sat up, but stayed on the bed as he watched the boy take the shirt off and grab a towel and wow. Something had changed from the last time he saw the boy, and that was definitely the muscles that had magically grown on him. He didn't want to make it obvious that he was staring, so he just nodded his head at what the boy was saying. "Okay," He said, getting up from the bed and starting to make his way towards the door. "You, um, have a nice shower." Elijah exited the room, looking at the terrarium before making his way over to it. He probably should have just waited for Wes to get out of the shower, but he wanted to look really cute and appealing when he got out, holding his frogs and probably turning him on in some weird way. Removing the lid, he saw the two little creatures at the bottom of the tank. He decided to scoop his hand to grab on, it wasn't the darker one so it must've been Lily. And Wes was right, she wasn't friendly, because as soon as Elijah picked her up from the glass contained, she completely jumped from his hand and onto the floor. A small gasp escaped his lips as she jumped around on the carpet. "I swear to god if you jump on a wet painting and die, I'm going to kill you before the paint does." Elijah put the top back of the container so the other wouldn't get loose, before getting down on the carpet and trying to track down the fucking frog before Wes realized how awful of a human being he was.

[bronsontbh]

Bronson smiled bashfully at Elijah’s remark. He could read him like a book. He had too much pride to ask others for help; it was like he didn’t want to be seen as like- handicapped or less capable of doing normal things just because he usually had a baby with him. But Elijah was right, he was causing himself misery in that way. He was only making the situation worse, and even though he was stubborn, he graciously handed Ella over to Elijah. A sigh escaped him. “Thanks,” he muttered a bit, his eyes a bit more alert as he watched Ella settle right into Elijah’s arms.

Ella was pretty laid back when it came to other people. If she was sleepy, she didn’t really care who she was being held by. Sometimes, she’d be fussy if it weren’t Bronson holding her, but not with Elijah. She curled up right against him. It must’ve been his generally calm, nurturing vibe he had. Bronson chuckled and shrugged. “Hey, at this point? I think I’ve lost all dignity.” He smiled and looked up at Elijah, ignoring his plea for him to go to sleep. “Who says you’ve never taken care of a baby before?” He smiled, motioning towards Ella. “You’re great at this. She’s already hunkered down. You must’ve been lying before. You’re definitely the baby whisperer or something.”

[elijah-sharp]

Elijah knew that Bronson always wanted to be the one in charge and have no one help him because he didn't want someone to help him, ever. But, reality set in eventually, and there wasn't really anything he could do. Bronson was extremely stubborn, but seemed to be extremely cautious when Elijah picked Ella up from his lap and into his. She wasn't heavy, really, but she smelled like formula and baby powder, which was a really nice and soothing smell. Looking down at her made Elijah smile a little bit as he caressed her face gently with his finger. 

"Maybe you and Faith didn't get along, but you created a really beautiful little baby." His eyes were sincere, along with his smile as he turned to look up at Bronson. Ella's little noises made him more alert as he looked down at her, making sure she wouldn't wake up and start crying noticing she wasn't in Bronson's arms anymore. "I guess you lose a little more dignity when you get your girlfriend pregnant." Elijah chuckled out sadly, knowing that hit wasn't really fair for him to bring up, but it was the honest truth. "I've actually held a baby once, and I don't even know if I'm doing it right," He shook his head a little bit, checking to make sure she wasn't in any weird position before pulling her up just a little and holding underneath her bottom. "Maybe she just likes me. I like to think I'm a little more relaxed than Spencer or Lena, you know."

[bronsontbh]

Bronson nodded, glancing at the window behind him out of habit. “Ah, yeah… I think they’re alright. Just damage.” He shrugged. That was his optimistic side showing. While he internally beat himself up pretty consistently, he was positive about other things. Plus, he was in no state to worry about the state of drunken people that decided to hop in a car… Not that he was entirely sure they were drunk or anything. Wasn’t his business. As Bronson sat on the ground, he looked up at Elijah, his bottom lip caught between his teeth and his eyes sleepily struggling to stay alert as he watched the other boy contemplated what he was going to do. A smile grew on Bronson’s lips.

"Because anyone else getting good sleep didn’t get their ex girlfriend pregnant," Bronson replied, his words slurred. He watched as Elijah brought his knees close to him. He shook his head a little, out of instinct at Elijah’s offer. Bronson was kind of stubborn. He didn’t love asking for help, but the bottom line was that raising a child on his own, at nineteen was the hardest thing he had ever done in his life, and probably would remain to be the hardest thing he’d ever do until later life. He glanced at the window, watching to see the reflection of the red and blue lights against the neighboring building. "Maybe when they clear out, out there?" Bronson suggested, turning his head to Elijah and offering him a smile. "Seriously, you can go back to sleep. But if I’m asleep out here when you wake up, splash water on me. Because…" He turned his head a bit and took in a deep breath, then exhaled in a sigh, "There is a good chance I’m sleeping here.”

[elijah-sharp]

Elijah could tell that Bronson was beyond tired, and it wasn't making it better that he looked completely inhumane. He didn't understand how someone could be so beautiful and look the way he did. It was just so fresh and amazing and something that could have come out of a Nicholas Sparks movie. However, he didn't really want to stay because he was tired, but he wasn't going to turn down the opportunity to hang out with Bronson at four in the morning-- of course not. 

"Everyone makes mistakes, don't dwell on it. When you have people offer to help, don't be modest and turn it down because you want to do the right thing. You're causing yourself misery that way." Elijah kept quiet, knowing that the people in the hallway would most likely come out and yell at them if they were any louder. Elijah looked at Bronson, and then at the baby before turned his best to just reach out to hold Ella himself and give Bronson a break. He knew babies were fragile, so when he reached out, he made perfectly aware that he would hold her very close to him and was able to just let her lay on his chest while he shook his head. "I'm not going  to let you fall asleep out here with Ella in your lap. You'll look pathetic." He laughed a little before rubbing Ella's back and looking at the little girl who had already been falling asleep in Bronson's lap. "You look like you're going to die or something. Go to sleep, honestly."

[wesley-hughes]

Wesley was happy that he and Elijah had the relationship that they did, because it was relaxed and fun and he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. They were close all throughout school, due to both of them having a lot of quirks, which brought them together. “It looks nice, like… it kind of makes you look badass, even though I know you’re not.” He teased, laughing quietly at himself and moving his hand from Eli’s face to rest on the boy’s waist. “Um, I’m not exactly sure.” Wesley stated, his face scrunching up in confusion as he tried to think of the last time he looked at the clock. He was sure it was sometime around four in the morning. “I didn’t have time to shower, though… I guess I could do that now, but I don’t want you to have to wait for me.” He shrugged, watching as the boy pulled back his sheets only to discover a bunch of paint splotches on the cotton material. “A little paint never killed anyone,” he grinned, nodding at Elijah’s question. “Basically, yeah. Making art is a very weird process, but it’s fun, even if you get inspired at the weirdest times of day.” 

[elijah-sharp]

"A badass?" Elijah bit his lip, smiling like an idiot because, really? He was anything but that, but hearing someone say that made him laugh to himself. "I could have changed from school, Wesley. You don't know." He smiled a little more, moving on the bed to get closer to his friend before picking at the paint and feeling the hand on his waist. It was nice, and it felt like something that was natural. It was kind of perfect, really. "How can you not have time for a shower? It would take five minutes." Elijah laughed a little bit, laying down more so he was almost looking all the way over to Wes before moving closer this time, resting his head on the boy's body. "Paint actually can kill you if you inhale too much of it or eat it, so, yes." He mumbled, looking up at him and pouting a little bit. "I will definitely wait for you to shower. Maybe I'll hold your frogs while you're in there." Elijah sat up, smiling to himself as he muttered out a laugh. "Have you ever showered with your frogs? That would be so funny."

[wesley-hughes]

What if I helped you take care of it? I’m really good at keeping pets, because I know what it’s like to be lonely, so I never let them go too long without a snuggle. We’d be like a little family, but we just wouldn’t live together. It could work. You’re welcome, but you usually pull off any color that you go with. Okay, that makes me feel better, ‘cause for a second I thought you were just using me. I know you’d never do that though, Eli. You’re one of my favorite people, like… ever, I think. So, I trust you. 

[elijah-sharp]

Don't say that, oh my god, it makes you sound like you're some lost animal. Stop, you're perfectly taken care of and loved very much, okay. We will have to talk about our pet ownership, but I think we could make it work, for sure. Well, thanks, Wes. Means a lot for you to say that. I would never use you; using people is completely heartless. One of your favorite people? Wow, that's a compliment. Stop being so nice to me. It's making me blush, aw.