I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.
i don't do bad sauce passes
Keni
Peter Solarz
Stranger Things
KIROKAZE
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Today's Document

No title available
Game of Thrones Daily

Kaledo Art
Three Goblin Art
art blog(derogatory)
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
taylor price

No title available
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
noise dept.
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
ojovivo
Monterey Bay Aquarium

seen from Japan
seen from United States

seen from South Korea

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from Canada
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from South Africa

seen from T1
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia

seen from United States
seen from United States

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@elossahrose
I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.
In case anyone is having a bad night:
Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found
Here are some fun sites
Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics
Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli
Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies
*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*
You’ll be okay, friend <3
i will reblog this everytime it shows up because any of my followers could have a bad night right now
All these links, besides the first, are broken. So here’s some more.
Here’s an emergency compliment
Here you can play 2048
Here’s a playlist of Bob ross
Here’s a website to watch movie’s and shows for free
Here’s a website to watch documentaries for free
Here you can to nothing for two minutes
Here you can break something. It’s good for anger
Here’s a button to press to make everything okay
Here’s a site to cut something up (TRIGGER WARNING)
Here’s a site that makes you a website depending on a song you choose
Here’s a gay comic. It’s adorable
Here you can spend Bill Gate’s money
Here you can draw your own island
Here you can learn about patterns website’s use
Here you can get your life stats
Here you can listen to the Tucker Zone (Headphones needed)
Here you can see how fast you’re moving
Here you can see the progress of time
Here you can see the future of the universe
Want some more?
Here’s the butterfly project
Here’s a snickerdoodle mug cake
Here’s a link to some free audiobooks
Here’s something to read when you feel like a burden
Here’s a secret
Here’s my playlist of some sea shanties
Here’s another secret
Here’s a link to some cool websites
Here’s a blog that gives you recipes for when you’re low on spoons
Here’s some Brony Headcanon’s
Some more? I’ve got plenty
Here’s 100,000 stars
Here you can control the weather (TW FLASHING IMAGES)
Here you can weave silk
Here you can make a castle of your own
Here you can make a kaleidoscope drawing
Here you can explore recursion
Here you can play a jelly block game
I’m back with some more!
Here you can draw with pasta
Here you can draw logo’s from memory
Here you can play this is sand, here you draw cool sand designs
Here you can play The Organ Trail
Here’s a customizable white noise website
Here you can simulate gravity
Here you can create your own guardian of the galaxy
Here you can make your own galaxy
Here’s a website you can get some support at.
to find later
Have you ever been bitten by an animal?
Yes and it was my fault
Yes and it was the animals fault
No but i know somone who was bit
No
If you said yes to the first 3 please explain in the tags what animal it was and what was the damage
i wonder if korra had always known she was bisexual or if she saw asami one day and thought lmao ok if i was straight at one point i’m not anymore
i have this headcanon that when she was younger and found out katara was married to her in her past life korra would get excited and be all “does that me you’re my wife?” and then if someone was rude to katara young korra would yell something like “don’t talk to my wife like that!” and just basically assume being with women was okay simply because she’s already been with them in past lives
I love seeing the lok fandom on my dash simply for cute shit like this man
Tenzin: Korra, go to your room
Korra: I AM YOUR FATHER, Tenzin go to your room
I have. A new recliner chair. It’s very comfy. but I am worried.
Mochi. Has decided that the best place to sleep is between my feet on the footrest. and when I have my laptop open I tend to. forget that he’s there.
I am going to dump him onto the floor.
Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow night but Eventually He will end up rudely dumped onto the floor, like so much salad.
Pictured: a cat unaware of the fate probably rapidly approaching him, despite me telling him three times now. He is too comfy to care.
Question: You dump your salads on the floor? Why?
Comorbid ADHD and carpal tunnel have lead to a disorder that I like to call “clumsy bitch syndrome” wherin if I get distracted or grab something wrong I will just… Drop whatever I’m holding? For some reason my favorite salad bowl is a regular victim. Also happens to piles of laundry, the TV remote, and sometimes knives.
I have a strict policy of never holding babies.
G U E S S W H A T I D I D
Mochi is either very forgiving or very bad at cause and effect.
Two different socks, t w o d I f f e r e n t s o c k s, T W O D I F F E R E N T S O C K S
They live in my shoes most of the time, so they’re the same by the most useful metric (Thickness).
In other news,
I tried to give mochi a headscritch while he was on the stairs.
my stairs are basically carpet-covered slabs of wood, with no “backing” so you can see through them. They’re also directly above the stairs that go down to the basement, so there’s a bit of a drop.
mochi
rolled over for bellyrubs
and fell
through the stairs
about six feet
before rolling over mid-air and catching himself on the floor/ledge above the basement stairs, claws digging into the wood like mufasa during that one scene that fucked up everyone’s childhood.
Unlike Mufasa
Mochi is both strong and not predestined to die for narrative purposes
so he hauled his fat ginger ass up over the ledge as I got to the bottom of the stairs.
he stared at me.
I stared at him.
Mochi then bellowed his loudest and most victorious of cat bellows, and threw himself into my chair and rolled over for bellyrubs. Which i gave him.
i am afraid
as Mochi is a ginger like my husband his father
that my son may have inherited my Clumsy Bitch Disease
the nice thing about cats is they’re mostly immune to fall damage
You Can’t Find My House
I just got off the phone with mom, and we came to the realization that my family has lived in a series of unplottable houses for a couple generations now.
-The First Unplottable House is on my dad’s side of the family, in Delphi, Iowa. The directions to it are the stuff of Buried Treasure: Turn off the county road with a fraction in it’s name, to the Named Dirt Road, then turn at The Discount Eggs Sign on to the Unnamed dirt road that takes a meandering path THROUGH a corn field, DO NOT take any forks on that road or the farmer will shoot your ass, then take the paved road that dead-ends on ALL the way to the end- No, farther, the road keeps going it’s not a cliff-The only indication that You Have Arrived At The Correct Driveway is that a fat gray pony will charge the car, screaming, then escort you the rest of the way there.
It’s on the side of an enormous river, they’ve owned the property since 1911, and that’s the ONLY route there.
-The Second Unplottable house is in Bedford, Ohio and belonged to my mother’s parents. It’s at the corner of two side-streets, right across from the tiny Italian grocery store. Due to strange development decisions, the house is about 30 feet above street level and rendered invisible by a chestnut tree so majestic Hyao Myazaki would probably put it in a movie. The driveway, however, is VERY visible from any of the surrounding houses, the grocer, or the street.
At least in theory and old photos, becuase if you actually GO there, your eyes slide right past it to the neighbor’s lillac bush, or to the retro neons of the grocery store or up the Chestnut tree. it is literally HARD to look at that driveway, all the world around it wants to pull you away.
-The Third Unplottable house is in Salinas, CA, home of my paternal grandparents. It is the single most BORING house possible- like, if you were to ask a third-grader to draw a prototypical house, they would draw my grandparent’s house. Utterly Unremarkable.
Except for the part where my Grandfather, spurred by his success with the “non-fruiting” peach tree, decided to plant a California Redwood Tree, and it grew to approximately 150 feet over the course of a few short decades. It is the tallest damn thing for miles around, and SOMEHOW deliveries keep being missed, mail is delivered to the neighbors, and any non-blood family that tried to visit would end up on the other side of town.
-The Fourth Unplottable House was the one I grew up in CA. The Directions to it are as follows: It’s the Bright Orange house Right Across From The School. You know, the one with six flamingos and the Volunteer Avacado Tree.
SOMEHOW, we got everyone’s mail but OURS (we still wonder about the letter from Fort Knox for Mr. Thomas Saxophone), the other kids got lost trying to visit and ended up in Mr.Phan’s yard on the other end of the block. Officer Brown, Mom and Dad’s friend, who had GPS back in the early 90′s becuase silicon valley, regularly got lost looking for our place. The Flamingos did nothing.
-My parent’s current house is the second house on the right after two right turns off the state highway that runs through town. Sounds easy, right?
Except that due to a couple small trees and a bend in the road, the house is invisible from the road. I have to stand out in the road if i want my pizza delivered. The Mailman is the only person who could reliably find the box, but he drives a subaru that’s older than my sister from the passenger side by leaning over, and delivers mail based on the aztec lunar calendar, so he’s probably not actually human. I tried to host a party, tied rainbow balloons to the mailbox, and all nine friends had to be waved in from the street.
-My current apartment building Does Not Exist, according to my Bank, medicaid, Google, and City Hall which was a bit exciting when I first moved in and had to call everyone that yes, I was sitting in a building that really exists.
Unless it’s my classmates, becuase they can apparently come to parties I don’t host. This Friday I had a friend telling me she had a great time at my place last Teusday… when I was home alone. She assures me that I held a houseparty with “Those polish things you make” (I make great mini klatchky, but haven’t served them to her) and that “You were definitely there, we talked about Carvaggio and you drive me home”
The only thing that offers any explanation is that you were drunk at the anecdote about your recent house party 🎉 nothing else is explainable
I’m deathly allergic to alcohol, and was definitely at home alone, emailing a former professor about werewolves. Got the chatlog and everything.
Guliya’s roommate recalls me dropping her off at the dorms, which is really peculiar. Another classmate, Jeff, was at the party with Guliya, and they thought it was my place too. Jeff is a jackass and I’d never invite him to my place.
God, I hope I don’t have another doppelganger.
… /another/ doppelganger???
The year is 2014, October. I have the beginnings of what will prove to be a rotten cold, and I decide to take the precaution of getting an enormous bowl of Pho from my local Vietnamese place in hopes of staving off another respiratory infection.
No sooner do I set foot in the door, and Mrs. Nguyen snaps up and shrieks YOU!! and I am much distressed and confused, because I adore Mrs. Nguyen. She kept My Intended alive last passover when the cafeteria covered literally everything in flour.
She insists that some time in august I had dined with a large group of friends and then skipped out on a $200 dollar tab. This is even more distressing and also impossible, as I had been in Oregon at the time, and only have like 3 IRL friends. She is livid, and absolutely insistent that it was me, and that I pay the tab or she’ll call the police. Being very distressed and not eager to have a panic attack in front of police, I pay up $216.87 and am banned forever. I go home in tears, without my Pho and am very sick for a fortnight.
Two months later, it’s Polish Butter Christmas, and I locate the source of my woes.
Polish Butter Christmas is the invention of my Intended’s friend/domesticated internet troll, where everyone deemed a friend or at least interesting party diversion is invited to their house and we all consume massive amounts of Traditional Polish Cooking, which is about 60% butter by weight. everyone eats way too much, most people also get shitfaced and i usually end up on the floor playing with 4-6 corgis, depending on who’s invited that year. in 2014, it was all six of them, rustling under the table like a pack of obese furry sausages.
Among the guests invited are myself, my Intended, The Troll’s girlfriend, and her friend. The latter is 5′2″, whiter than mayonnaise, with bright purple hair and green glasses. I also am 5′2″, glow under black lights, had bright purple hair and still have green glasses. We learn furthermore, that we have the same first name and live on the same side of town. This is laughed off as Most Amusing, at first.
The celebration goes on, and I become steadily less amused as I learn that Not-Me is a BITCH. Racist jokes, yelling at the dogs to make them cower becuase “They look so funny!”, and generally abrasive and cruel. Everyone is uncomfortable and Troll confides quietly to me in the kitchen that she is not invited next year, but needs an excuse to throw her out, or his dad will have a fit. Troll’s family is as much a gang of cryptids as mine, and cannot go around Un-Inviting people without Due Cause. So we agree to suffer quietly and laugh about it next year.
Eventually, the conversation turns to “Youthful Shenanigans”, and while most people have the sense to tell stories where they did something dumb but not actually illegal, Not-Me recounts with utter glee “That time me and my hoes dine-and-dashed that one chink place hahaha”
I suddenly put two and two together and realize that This Bitch Has Personally Wronged Me.
“You CUNT.” I tell her, furious at the realization ad the fact that she’s been steadily ruining Polish Butter Christmas for the last three hours. “Mrs. Nguyen thinks I did that! I HAD TO PAY THE TAB!”
“Oh, uh my bad, haha…” She laughed awkwardly.
“HA. YES. FUNNY. WE ARE GOING TO THE PLACE, YOU ARE APOLOGIZING TO MRS. NGUYEN AND PAYING ME BACK YOU INSUFFERABLE BITCH.” I yelled, grabbing her arm and dragging her towards the door, Corgis yapping excitedly at our ankles.
“Whaa? No! fuck you!” She said, winching her arm out of my grip and doing an amazing four-inch-heel-sprint for the bathroom, locking herself in.
She has made a rather serious error in the Troll is both 1. a 6′6″ Sasquatch of a man, and 2. TOTALLY WILLING to take a crowbar to the bathroom window he’d been planning on renovating anyway, esp if it mean he gets to haul a bitch out and toss her into the back of the minivan with the three least-obese corgis, so that we may drive her, sobbing about injustice the whole way.
Nothing in my life will ever be so satisfying as dragging Not-Me into Pho 67, and seeing the look of horror and recognition cross Mrs. Nguyen’s face as she realized what had happened, then having Not-Me withdraw the money from the ATM at the front.
We then returned to Polish Butter Christmas and had a splendid time feeding buttered pork to the corgis.
But you see why I am loathe to deal with another one.
Every sentence that gets added just reinforces that this is a Neil Gaiman story in the Sandman universe near the Ocean at the end of the Lane.
And no one’s gonna question the werewolf email to Prof?
Congratulations on being the first person to ask about the werewolves! Prof Hoffman teaches a course called Freaks And Monsters, which was THE BEST literature course I’ve ever taken and she was the first person to get my idiot brain to understand symbolism.
I’m writing a book about Crypids In America and was emailing her to see if she had any recommended reading for me, and to introduce her to my Botany professor becuase I think they’d be friends. She was a little late replying to me becuase she’s in Rome documenting gargoyles, but she and Botany prof are planning an expedition to Moscow to retrieve a book for rare mushroom plates before the crazy cat lady who’s keeping it accidentally destroys them.
You sure the party doppelganger is not the same doppelganger as Bitch Doppelganger?
THANK YOU FOR ASKING BECAUSE I HAVE AN UPDATE.
So last night I’m out walking Charlie at 2AM becuase it was the first break in the lightning we’d had since 6PM, and I go around the corner and literally for half second I thought I was about to walk into a mirror becuase I found my local doppelganger and this time it’s WEIRD.
I’ve got weird curly brown hair that goes kind of Bride-Of-Frankenstein when it gets long, have a weird hound mix from AZ, and am art major with a science background. I grew up in the bay area and moved to CO in middle school. I’m a night owl with a bad habit of signing up for morning classes. I’ve got a super-common first and middle name, and a less-common irish surname. I’m in 105D
SHE has got the same hair and face, her dog is a weird hound mix that’s like a paletteswap of charlie also from AZ, possibly the same ranch, She’s a biology major with an art minor, grew up in CO and moved to the bay area in middle school, is a morning person with afternoon classes. We have the same first and middle names, in reverse order, and she has the other spelling of my last name. She’s in 105A.
Statistically, some of this is not surprising- both combinations of names are common, and there was a lot of cross-traffic between CO and CA in 2004, all Rez dogs are shaped the same, and Art/science isn’t that odd a major/minor combo.
She did throw that party back in novemeber, and I was much relived, and she was glad to find out I exist- We’ve somehow gotten into the same circle of art/science/queer friends without meeting up, and Guliya was bugging her telling stories of My Shenanigans, and attributing them to her.
We’ve arranged a coffee-date with Gulia and are gonna show up in the same outfit just to fuck with her.
I am now following you just because I don’t want to miss finding out what happened with the coffee date.
Oh my Zod. ::also follows::
How old is this post? Did the coffee date happen? Has Guliya’s head asploded? I must know!
Yes, I too must know.
Also I live near Bedford and really want to find this house that has a driveway with an SEP field generator.
IIIIIIITS MOTHAFUKKEN UPDATE TIME!! So the date got put off for a bit because of school issues, but Doppelganger and I managed to coordinate outfits and met up at the local coffee place half an hour before Guliya arrives, and plan our strategy.
This coffeehouse has bathrooms located at the end of a U-shaped hallway, so I was going to wait in the hall and Doppelganger in the main part of the cafe. After a bit of chatting, D would get up to use the restroom and we’d swap places. The idea was to see how many times we could swap before Guliya noticed something was amiss. I hear Guliya arrive, and wait.
After about 15 minutes, D comes down the hall, gives me a quick update on the convo so far- the self-inflicted-illness of a professor and the astonishing number of bears about- and I go out.
Guliya notices NOTHING.
We talk more about bears and the terrifying lack of life skills some freshmen have and I go back, complaining of bladder issues. D and I swap places 3 more times like this, before Guliya notices that we seem to be ill and she can recommend a specialist, so we decide to end the game. We both walk out while Guliiya is texting someone and sit down across from her.
Knowledge is often described as “dawning’ on people, the soft illumination of understanding. This was like watching someone get caught by the totality of an unscheduled eclipse. She looked up from her phone, delighted to continue the conversation and watching her face collapse into wall-eyed horror is something that I will treasure for ages.
“There are two of you!”
“Yes!” We said, in unintentional creepy unison.
She stared at us for a few moments, surprise giving way to puzzlement, then, relief.
“Thank Fuck.” She sighed. “I was beginning to wonder when the hell you slept.”
Apparently she had conflated out two identities into some sort of double-major two-jobs constantly-awake superbeing and had been worried about keeping up with Us.
“I mean I don’t anyway. I have terrible insomnia.” I said, unhelpfully.
“Which one of you has the rant about Carvaggio?” She asked.
“That’s both of us.”
“And the one who nearly got eaten by bears?”
“Still both of us.”
“Well how am I supposed to tell you apart?” She grumbled.
“I’m the one passed out on the chemistry building couch, they’re the one on the figure-drawing couch.” D offered.
“We can only sleep when surrounded by dangerous chemicals and poor judgement.” I explained.
“It reminds us of our home dimension of Madness.” D continued.
“Fuck both of you, and any other of you out there.” said Gulia, downing more macchiato for strength.
“Don’t be mean to 27.” I said.
“He had nothing to do with this.” D continued.
Guliya snorted macchiato out of her nose at that one. We apologized, she thought it was hilarious and now D is #9 and I’m #426.
i think we’ve found The Most Interesting Person In The World.
Hold on, is anyone going to question the BOTH NEARLY EATEN BY FRIGGIN BEARS???
Since I had someone send me an ask about this chain of events: Yes, I’m the blog (or at least one of them) with a chronic doppelganger problem. Some Updates/explanations:
D graduated with her degree in Zoology and is planning to take a year off to travel through the National Park System before going to Grad school in New York.
She finds her anonymous internet fame amusing and is amazed more people haven’t got similar stories, as I’m her second doppelganger so far.
D has also grown her hair out to her shoulders and I’ve kept mine at something approaching a buzzcut so at least Guliya can tell us apart now.
She’s Very Disappointed by this.
Guliya is pronounced “Julia” but her parents liked the unusual spelling.
The gargoyle prof/botany prof trip to Moscow has been postponed due to the state of International Politics right now, but they have managed to verify that the rare mushroom plates are, in fact, safe.
They’re going to Greece instead.
Domestic Troll and his girlfriend have invited us to Polish Butter Christmas again this year.
Girlfriend heard a rumor that Bitch!Doppelganger is now living in Nebraska, possibly after getting in trouble with the law in CO.
There are a frankly insane number of Black Bears in Durango, CO and many of them are far too human-acclimated. Neither of us were in danger of being eaten (Guliya is prone to dramatics) but I nearly walked right up to the local sow walking the dog last summer, and D had to stay late in the Bio building one night becuase one was climbing all over her car like it was a jungle gym.
After Two Years in Durango, the apartment is now findable by most services and at least six live humans. However, the lease is up at the end of June and I will be moving soon and I’m sure this nonsense will begin again. We’re already off to a great start with the real estate option of a House that has IT’S OWN GODDAMN DOPPELGANGER. They were built in the same year by the same contractor, are nearly the same color of beige and have EXACTLY IDENTICAL STREET ADDRESSES except one is in the city of Westminster, and the other is in broomfield.
Ronald Reagan pretty much ruined everything for millennials.
fuckin’ ronnie
I try and bring up how he ruined free in state tuition in the name of hippie bashing when he was California’s governor often, but don’t exactly have the biggest platform.
“Worst of all, these students’ sense of the future is constrained by planning for and then paying down their student loans, often for decades. Economists are waking up to the fact that when young Americans enter the workforce burdened with over a trillion dollars in cumulative debt, they become risk averse, unwilling to move, less able to make major purchases, and slower to become homeowners. Not coincidentally, they don’t feel safe enough to register any major protests against the society that’s done this to them.”
Damn.
i am reblogging again because….. fuck ronald reagan forever and ever and ever and ever.
Economists should be adept in their fields, how are they only now realizing that paying off our student debt is a fucking priority over anything else other than food?
Weird, it’s almost like there’s something missing from the study of economics.
Who would have possibly thought that a young generation owing trillions of dollars could have a negative effect on the economy?
I just think them being happily in love is neat.
reblog if youre lgbt+ and watched H2O just add water when you were a kid
Me: I want to know languages
Person: then study
Me: no study. Only know.
fun fact about american history: george washington was apparently so sexy that when he was 17 he went swimming a river and some girl that had a crush on him stole his clothes and watched as he walked around naked looking for them
aaron burr, the guy who shot alexander hamilton and also the second vice president of the united states, tried to start an empire out in texas
marquis de lafayette literally had to sneak out of france to come aid america and while some versions of the story claim that he disguised himself as a commoner, other versions say he dressed up like a woman
literally all the founding fathers had daddy issues, specifically alexander hamilton who refused to even befriend george washington initially because he didn’t want to grow close to someone who had the potential to become a father like figure to him
thomas jeffereson kept a bust of alexander hamilton in his house at monticello for no reason other than the fact that hamilton was his sworn enemy and he felt as though he needed a very expensive bust of his sworn enemy in his house
I love all of this please keep going.
they didn’t let hamilton try this one course of study at king’s college because it was so intense that it made one student literally get sick and have to go home for months on end and that student was james madison
george washington made a rule banning snacks during cabinet meetings because thomas jefferson would always eat mac n cheese which wasn’t big in the us at the time and all the other founding fathers thought it was disgusting
aaron burr once set himself on fire because he attempted to light a candle by shooting it because he was too tired to get an actual match and his gun was nearby
hi everyone im still pissed we never learnt in school that shakespeare was bi and wrote the sonnets about a dude and a woc he was into
hi everyone im still pissed that we were told emily dickinson was a spinster when she spent her whole life writing love letters to a woman
hi everyone im still pissed about the fact that we never got taught any of the super super gay Greek myths. it seems impossible to think they managed to pick all the hetero myths when Greece was just THAT gay but guess what? they did.
hi everyone virginia woolf was also bi im still pissed that so much of literature is queer and has queer coding within it that deserves to be analysed through that lens in the same way that we don’t ignore the gender of an author, but sexuality is never mentioned in highschool literature classes
hi everyone i’m still pissed that we were never taught that da vinci was gay af and that the ideal the western world has of jesus (white, long straight brown hair) was based on one of his male lovers
hi everyone i’m still pissed that we were told sir isaac newton died a virgin when he had multiple boyfriends over the course of his life one of whom he wrote passionate love letters too and lived with
A porcupine’s Halloween present (+ original sound effects)
I had no idea giant porcupines made fucking precious sounds
THAT’S THE SOUND IT MAKES!?!?!?
UN-BE-FUCKING-LIEVABLE
We got asked if this is cute and okay. I can very happily say yes, this is stupid cute and those are happy porcupine noises.
One of my favorite things about doing zoo work was all the noises you never realize the animals make when they’re excited or interested in a new thing. Coatimundis squeak and snuffle, and giant porcupines make that sound.
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen this video on my dash, so it’s time to bring it back! The information provided above is still correct, and was sourced directly from the zookeeper that takes care of this specific animal.
have i ever told y’all the story about how a snake knew I was trans years before I did
okay so
my 7th grade social studies/8th grade science teacher (he did both classes. Somehow…) had a snake lovingly named Hisser. Hisser would occasionally be taken out to crawl and he was held by kids and when there were fire alarms Hisser was taken along, usually to his chagrin.
This was one of those days where we had in class work time and most of us were just chilling and so Mr. A got Hisser out and started passing him around.
Every girl student that he came to, he would immediately snuggle up to, wrap around their arms, and get cozy. With boy students, he would just sort of sit in the coiled lump that he’d been handed in. This was true with just about every single student, and Mr. A said that Hisser likes girls a lot better than guys and this has been thoroughly proven by Hisser’s attitude.
Then Hisser was handed to me. He was a loveable cold scaley rope as you would expect, but he didn’t coil around my arms. He didn’t get cozy. He just sat there. And Mr. Anderson said, “Huh. That’s weird. He usually likes girls.”
I passed the snake to my friend and surely enough, Hisser wrapped around her arms and got cozy.
I came out as a trans guy about 7-8 years later, and just recently realized that Hisser was right about me not being a girl all along.
I’ve also decided that whenever anyone asks me “Why I think I’m a boy,” which is my LEAST favorite question ever, I’ll just tell them that a snake told me a long time ago.
That snake is like a Sorting Hat for trans people
The only true ally
Today on things you shouldn't drink:
Fists.
Join us tomorrow for more Things you shouldn't drink.
Today on things you shouldn't drink:
Magic.
Join us tomorrow for more Things you shouldn't drink.
Today on things you shouldn't drink:
Hair dye.
Join us tomorrow for more Things you shouldn't drink.