ASSISTANT ( əˈsistənt ) - NOUN: A Person Paid Almost Nothing & Required To Do Pretty Much Everything.

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ASSISTANT ( əˈsistənt ) - NOUN: A Person Paid Almost Nothing & Required To Do Pretty Much Everything.
SEND “⚡️” AND A QUESTION AND MY MUSE WILL BE FORCED TO ANSWER HONESTLY
TWD is on tonight, so I prepare for the A) heartbreak B) beautiful gore that I am really hoping for and C) the return of my TWD OC muse, Ryan. ( Aka Pacifist McAnxietyFuck. Why are all my muses so anxious? )
But anyways. I’m gonna try and snaffu through shit on this blog, and who knows, possibly my other ones.
The Good News and the Bad News
Send me “So, what’s the situation?”, and I’ll generate two numbers between 1-15 to see both the good and the bad news that my muse will tell yours (some might contradict one another, in which case feel free to just generate another one).
Keep reading
Accidental/unusual reasons to stick together
‽ - Our muses get lost together ☁ - Our muses find shelter from the weather…in the same place ₪ - Due to an accident, your muse was given the same Hotel Room as mine… ✂ - Our muses discover to have a common enemy/rival…and decide to collaborate ♕ - Our muses compete for the same prize ❤ - Our muses go blind/speed dating and happen to find each other ☀ - My muse is found guilty, your muse gets mistaken for their collaborator and is forced to run away with them. ♡ - Our muses must pretend to be in a relationship ◎ - My muse finds yours injured ❂ - Your muse finds mine injured ▓ - The awful weather forced our muse to stay stuck home ( Bonus if one of them doesn’t live there) ✮ - Our muses must find a place where to spend the night
cantcontrolthegay:
the rumors are true: im soft and i just want to be loved
Accidental/unusual reasons to stick together
‽ - Our muses get lost together ☁ - Our muses find shelter from the weather…in the same place ₪ - Due to an accident, your muse was given the same Hotel Room as mine… ✂ - Our muses discover to have a common enemy/rival…and decide to collaborate ♕ - Our muses compete for the same prize ❤ - Our muses go blind/speed dating and happen to find each other ☀ - My muse is found guilty, your muse gets mistaken for their collaborator and is forced to run away with them. ♡ - Our muses must pretend to be in a relationship ◎ - My muse finds yours injured ❂ - Your muse finds mine injured ▓ - The awful weather forced our muse to stay stuck home ( Bonus if one of them doesn’t live there) ✮ - Our muses must find a place where to spend the night
- So? Do I make this look good?
- Yeah, sure.
;;{⌘}:Headcanon - Fights
With Kazimir’s general demeanor, it’s relatively easy to assume he’d make for a pathetic fighter who hasn’t had much experience. After all, he’s plainly anxious, dependent, and simply may seem the type to shy away from a fight. However, that’s only partially true.
Kazimir does, in current state of things, tend to avoid violence, and shy away from conflict. But, this doesn’t mean he’s never seen a fight, nor that he’d be useless in one. In fact, from his youth, Kazimir is rather experienced in the matter. When he was a young teenager in St Petersburg he had a certain love for the thrill of a fight. More often than not it was merely amid friends, but rarely did they hold back with each other. Broken ribs, chipped teeth, swollen jaws, etc etc were all fairly common.
In fights outside of his friend group, or more so to say fights that aren’t for fun, Kazimir isn’t the most fair of individuals.
ASSISTANT ( əˈsistənt ) - NOUN: A Person Paid Almost Nothing & Required To Do Pretty Much Everything.
;;{⌘}:Headcanon - Bolshoi
Kazimir’s companion, Bolshoi is a small mixed breed dog ( Pom/Beagle/? ) that he got shortly after he move to Tokyo. Having gotten him when he was a puppy, he suspected that the little puff of a dog might grow much bigger than he eventually did, and might serve as a guard dog. ( Hence why he named him Bolshoi, meaning ‘Big’ ).
Kazimir was slightly disappointed to know his dog would remain such a tiny puff and not be much of a guard dog, but he loves the little dog dearly anyhow, and is pleased to have a companion at home. Bolshoi is the epitome of a lap dog and companion animal, at Kazimir’s side the moment he walks in the door.
The down side of a white dog, of course, is that Kazimir’s clothes are frequently coated with the little dog’s fur.
TEXT MESSAGE STARTERS ! Send one of the prompts below to get a response from my muse.
drunk texts:
( ✉ → sms ) plea se eh elep me im drunk and i dotn know whe re i am
( ✉ → sms ) i fukcing miss yo u
( ✉ → sms ) i look so fuckigjn GOOD
( ✉ → sms ) i csnst stop throwiging up
( ✉ → sms ) fu ck you for hurting me
( ✉ → sms ) why dotn you ever call me anymore huh
( ✉ → sms ) stop being so fuckigjn borign and coekm to my party
( ✉ → sms ) i dropped my pzziza o nt eh floror im fuckgin pissed
( ✉ → sms ) i j sut left you a 3 mintue long voicemail singing. sorry
( ✉ → sms ) even when i’m durnk ic ant sotp thinking about oyu
hateful texts:
( ✉ → sms ) you’re pathetic
( ✉ → sms ) you make me miserable
( ✉ → sms ) fuck you. delete my number.
( ✉ → sms ) you never meant anything to me, anyway.
( ✉ → sms ) fuck your apologies, you can keep them.
( ✉ → sms ) congrats on always ruining everything
( ✉ → sms ) my life would be so much easier without you.
( ✉ → sms ) and next time you feel like calling me… don’t.
( ✉ → sms ) i don’t want anything to do with you anymore.
( ✉ → sms ) if your goal was to make me hate you, then congratulations. mission accomplished.
misc/random texts:
( ✉ → sms ) i think my neighbor is an alien.
( ✉ → sms ) help me think of a name for my new dog
( ✉ → sms ) sooooo… what was your first impression of me
( ✉ → sms ) should i get pizza or chicken wings for dinner?
( ✉ → sms ) no one’s ever made me feel the way you do.
( ✉ → sms ) i borrowed your weed. hope you don’t mind.
( ✉ → sms ) why do they say drugs are bad when they make you feel so good
( ✉ → sms ) today is the oldest you’ve ever been, but the youngest you’ll ever be again…
( ✉ → sms ) [ File Attached: 001329.jpg ] of all the drunk pictures i have of you, this one is my favorite.
( ✉ → sms ) i used your pics to catfish someone, and since they bought me a laptop… you have a date with them tomorrow.
@wolfpupy twitter ask meme
❝ its all fun and games until its not that anymore ❞
❝ i grow more powerful every day and by powerful i mean sad ❞
❝ only the good die young? phew good thing that i am so incredibly awful ❞
❝ if theres one thing i dont know about its everything ❞
❝ heres some general life advice, when the sun hits the ground find somewhere to hide ❞
❝ surfs up. hail satan ❞
❝ after 13 long years congress approved a bill that will finally let the bodies hit the floor ❞
❝ hey kids, i know youre struggling right now but im here to tell you, everything gets worse forever ❞
❝ in a way aren’t we all responsible for my actions ❞
❝ some say love is a river, me i say things that make sense ❞
❝ if your newborn baby has a full head of hair that means it is a business baby and is ready to enter the world of finance ❞
❝ i may be dumb as hell but i am also insanely stupid ❞
❝ take every thing you own and throw it into the ocean who cares ❞
❝ you know the old saying, boys will be trash ❞
❝ one of these days i will float up off into damn space and no one can stop me, not even gravity or nasa ❞
❝ if i could shoot anything with a gun i would probably shoot another gun, the hunter become the hunted ❞
❝ lets forget about the bodies for a second. what do you really want to let hit the floor? your feelings perhaps? ❞
❝ i’ve seen a lot of things in my time, which i blame on me leaving my eyes open. things got a lot better once i decided to just close them ❞
❝ learning from mistakes is for people who recognise that they make mistakes. i dont give a shit ❞
❝ there are few things in life that can’t be achieved with occult dark magic ❞
❝ how to predict the future: think of the worst possible thing that could happen ❞
❝ halloween is forever bitch ❞
❝ who are the real criminals, me who does the crimes or the people who hurt my feelings all the time ❞
❝ looks like things are always happening once again ❞
❝ i am going to lay completely still on the forest floor until either things start going my way or i disintegrate into nothing ❞
❝ im sure im going to ruffle some feathers with this but given the choice between good times and bad times i would like to have the good times ❞
❝ the best way to solve problems is to create more problems until you are dead ❞
❝ tired of people always telling me go to hospital and that i’ve lost a lot of blood, its my severe head injury not yours stay out of it ❞
❝ i hit the hay all day mother fucker. 24 hour sleep cycle. if you awake you a fake. its bed time bitch ❞
❝ i hope one day i will find love, or a cool looking leaf. either one ❞
❝ piles of uneaten candy will signal im dead ❞
❝ the hairless rat is not a new species, merely a result of my failed scam of shaving rats and selling the hair back to them at a high price ❞
❝ we let the bodies hit the floor then what? next we’ll have bodies hitting walls, roofs, you name it, bodies will be hitting it ❞
❝ sometimes the people that hurt us the most are the ones swinging big knives around while screaming and trying to cut us ❞
❝ yeah yeah blame the guy whos dna matches with the dna found at the crime scene. surprise surprise ❞
❝ for as long as i can remember i have been able to remember things, maybe even before that ❞
❝ yeah i looked both ways before crossing the street, i looked both ‘handsome’ and ‘radiant’, too bad i got hit by that car ❞
❝ stop living in a dream world and start living in the regular nightmare world all of the rest of us live in ❞
❝ blood moon, very cool to see. and whats the sun doing again? the same regular thing for the millionth time? what a load of worthless trash ❞
❝ if existing for an amount of time has taught me anything its that i have no idea whats going on ❞
❝ hurled my bible at the paper boy and knocked him off his bike with the real news ❞
❝ i’ll go in whatever direction the wind takes me, and if i am too heavy for wind to move me around i will probably just lay down and die here ❞
❝ i’ve said it before and i will say it again, i think people should give me hundreds of dollars and feel good about doing it ❞
❝ wow, i’ve never thought about it like that before. and i never will. i’ve already forgotten what you said, good bye forever ❞
❝ stop being so defensive i am just trying to hit you with weapons ❞
❝ dont betray me and act surprised when i get revenge on you, thats the number one consequence of betraying me. everyone knows it. even babies ❞
❝ blood is just nature’s red water that flys out when you make a mistake. relax and enjoy the experience for once ❞
❝ reached the limit of what you can do with imagination? why not try occult dark magic ❞
❝ if anyone needs me i will be laying face down on the ocean floor ❞
❝ its time to forget the mistakes of the past and start making the mistakes of the future ❞
"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."
;;{⌘}: Random Sentence Starters || Accepting || @wildcrcw
What a...dreary view on things. Kazimir couldn’t seem to find agreement in himself that people were truly at a loss. Toxic and twisted as they were, as a whole were they really all that lost? His mind wades through these thoughts, broken from it by the yap of the puff of white--Bolshoi, Kazimir’s dog--who was at his heel. His little yip directed up at him, as if he’d intended on telling Kazimir, focus, there’s someone here.
“Do you think so?”He asks the other man, his head tipped somewhat to the side. “Things are dark. But as a society, don’t you think we’ve grown from much of our flaws? Or...maybe we’ve just learned to hide them better?”
The Face Of A True Guard Animal: Bolshoi!