Switchblades And Infidelity

Emmett Anderson • 17 • WMHS • Freshman

[emmettxanderson]

valerie-smythe:

Unlikely, since I have to deal with people who are equally as boring as you and your siblings are. There’s no saving Lima, Ohio. This town is already on life support, but I suppose I’m more than willing to pull the plug, if that’s what you were getting at. Sure, some fun…  Of course it’s not going to be permanent. My dads are just pretending like it is to punish Lou and I. It’s their pathetic way of trying to scare us straight. But knowing that it’s only a matter of time, doesn’t make it any less annoying. Speaking of annoying, what’s up with you, fun-sized Anderson? Did you get lost in the city and ended up falling into a sales rack at Hot Topic? 

The last person in this town that’s boring is me, thank you very much. I don’t think pulling the plug is even enough to kill this god forsaken town. Nothing will. Lima will live on how it is forever, it’s a curse. Punishing you guys? What did the two of you do now that would warrant a punishment as bad as moving here? Nothing’s up with me, I’m just trying out a little something new. There’s nothing wrong with it.

[valerie-smythe]

Color me surprised; Hillbilly High School seems to be just as vapid and pointless as the shitty boarding school I went to in Paris, with the added touch of cow poop stench everywhere you walk. And here I thought that living under a rock would at least help even the dumbest idiots among us build some character, but after driving past a couple of hicks in Letterman jackets who were highkey entertaining themselves with cow tipping, I lost what little hope I had left in humanity. 

Note to self, never give anything or anyone the benefit of the doubt again. 

[emmettxanderson]

Well, now that you’re in town I bet all that boring shit is bound to change, right Smythe? I don’t think a Parisian boarding school is anything in comparison to McKinley. This place is a load of shit, no pun intended. At least in Paris there’s some fun surrounding you. What are you guys doing back here anyway? You’d think after your fathers escaped the first time they’d learn their lesson and stay away. Don’t tell me you’re here for good, because I’d honestly feel a little bad that you have to be stuck here. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

I know that, and I regret that a lot and stuff. I liked it better before that, even though sharing you with all the vampire kids sucked a lot too. I didn’t feel important, I felt sad… and that’s like totes not what you said when you broke up with me, so I don’t get why you’re yelling at me for that… you did, you hurt me a lot and you’re still hurting me and it’s not fair at all.. Okay, I’ll do just that then, because you’re a mean and cold person now and I don’t like you anymore, Emmett.

Then you should have talked to me about it, Riley. Not conspire against me in a plot full of rage and jealousy. You know I would have understood, I always do... Because... it hurts anyway... but it doesn’t matter. That doesn’t matter.... Oh fucking well, consider it a mutual feeling them. Nothing is fair in life, Riley. The sooner you learn that the better.... Good. That feeling is mutual too. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

Just cause…. you were my boyfriend and stuff, but you wanted to hang out with Avery like all the time and it made me feel like a sad and lonely unicorn and that’s not fair… and you didn’t wanna patch anything up, you just wanted to be mean and yell at me, and you dumped me… and that hurt a lot too but like, I didn’t get a sorry from you but I still forgave you and stuff…. Okay… um, but if you are wrong about that and he still exists, can you tell him that I miss him? And that he can come live at my house if he’s a sad unicorn too and doesn’t wanna get yelled at by a meanie?

Avery is my friend, Riley. You spent so long trying to make that happen, and then it did and you... just got pissy and jealous and it was bullshit. You were my boyfriend, Riley. The most important person in my life. I shouldn’t have to worry about you getting pissy because I have friends I want to spend time with... YES I DID! IF YOU WOULD HAVE JUST WAITED WE COULD HAVE! INSTEAD YOU GOT IMPATIENT. IT’S BULLSHIT. I don’t have to say I’m sorry. I didn’t do anything wrong.... No. Because you don’t deserve him. Want that kind of treatment, call up you douche bag boyfriend and get it from him. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

…No need to call me mean names like that… I guess I did, but I said sorry for it, and like, it’s sorta your fault as well but you never said sorry to me even though you hurt me and stuff. Um yea, I do… but like, I miss the nice Emmett who gave me cuddles and boy kisses, not the mean one who yells at me and calls me an idiot…

There’s no need for a lot of things, yet they still happened. How the hell is it my fault, Riley? Enlighten me. Explain it to me. How is it my fault? I’m not the liar here. Nor did I rush myself into something else before we were able to patch anything up... You don’t get that Emmett. You have a boyfriend for all of that. So that Emmett doesn’t exist anymore. Learn to damn well deal with it. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

Umm okay, if you say so, Em. Maybe just be nice without getting gifts in exchange then? Huh, what do you mean? Do you not want me to be nice to you? You’re like totes confusing… Well, obvi I didn’t, I mean, Aves is straight and stuff??? I don’t believe you at all… and I miss you a lot…

I didn’t mean it like that, idiot. I mean you fucked me over.... you hurt me. Obviously he cane forgive you right away because you didn’t hurt him the way you hurt me.... Well, get used to the idea. Because it’s long gone.... Right, sure you do. I’m sure you’re missing me a fuckton whenever you’re with your frat boy. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

You totes sound like you are, Em. It’s okay, I get it. Maybe if you’re nicer next year you’ll get one too. Um, that is kinda what it means. Plus I’ve been really nice to you and stuff, trying to make it up but you always yell at me. It’s super unfair. I totes deserve to be forgiven, Avery thought so too. I don’t understand why you can’t do it. Don’t you like, miss me at all?

I’m not, Jesus fuck. I don’t give a shit about being nice to people, especially not you. At least not in the terms of getting shit in exchange. Being nice to me doesn’t... ugh... whatever, Lopez. Yea, well, you didn’t fuck Avery the way you fucked me. It’s fine and dandy that you two are friends, but that ship sailed for us.... No...

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

Um?? You’re totes confusing me right now. Are you like jealous or something that I’m getting a reindeer? It’s not my fault Santa likes me more than he likes you, Em. If you were nicer he’d give you something cool as well. Why are you being so mean to me? That’s not fair at all… I said sorry and stuff, so you should forgive me. It’s how it works when you apologize. 

No, Riley, I’m not jealous of your stupid Reindeer. I don’t care if Santa likes me or not, I don’t live life to appease him or act nice for a month out of the year just to make sure I get good presents. Yes, it’s completely fair. Just because you said sorry does not mean you get to be forgiven. You’ve done nothing to earn my forgiveness other than say sorry. And you know what, I don’t think you deserve it anyway. So, deal with it.

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

I hope so, I put it on my Christmas list but like, I did that also last year, and the year before that… I think there’s just no unicorns on the north pole?? It’s probably like too cold for them. Maybe I should ask for a reindeer instead, because they’re cute too and they can fly. Becauseee, it will be fun, and you know it will be fun. I’m sure Santa has a gift for you too, like a really tiny one, since you’re totes not very nice right now.

Yea Riley, sure, that’s why you haven’t gotten a damn unicorn for Christmas. I highly doubt you’ll be getting Reindeer either. For many reasons, and none of the ones you’re thinking of. No, it won’t be. I’d rather listen to an hour straight of nails on a chalk board than spend any time around you. I don’t need Santa’s stupid gifts, and I’m justified in my meanness so deal with it. 

[emmettxanderson]

rileylopez:

I’m totes excited too! My moms are going to throw an awesomesauce Christmas party and like, they invited Santa to come over too! What kind of family things are you doing, Em? If they’re like super lame and boring you can come to my party if you want.

Wow, even Santa is invited? Next you’ll be telling me you found an actually unicorn under your tree.... My family is never lame or dull around the Holidays. And even if they were, why would I come to hang out with you, Lopez? There’s about a million better things to do with my time, including lame family holiday things.

[emmettxanderson]

Thank fucking god. Only one more week and then we get a break from the hell establishment they call school. I’m just really excited for Christmas, Heather’s coming home, and we’re gonna do family things and.... god fucking bless, it’s only another week away. 

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

[rileylopez]

But I’m like used to you texting me and stuff… Okay, if you say so.. it just doesn’t seem like you need them as much lately.. That doesn’t sound like a very fun time to me then, with all the crying. Vampires are like super weird people, I guess. No, they totes do, Em. They just don’t know yet what they’re like missing out on. Oh, am I really still your favorite person? Because it’s like kinda hard to tell… No, I mean, you’d rather do friend stuff with Avery and the unsexy people instead of having boy kisses me… it sucks a lot.

[emmettxanderson]

Yea, but sometimes you could return the favor and text me first. To take is to give, and all of that stuff.I promise I need them as much now as I always have, okay? I enjoyed myself, it was nice having all my friends back together and stuff. Even if emotions were haywire. And they’re not vampires Riles, don’t call them that... Not everyone’s gonna wanna be into you in life, Riley. Better to accept it now than be upset over it forever. Of course you are, you’re my best friend, right? Oh... well I mean, it’s not that I’d rather hang out with them. It’s just that, you know, they are my friends and all. You could always come hang out with us too. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind, just don’t look Valerie or Lily in the eyes and you’d be fine. 

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

[rileylopez]

Um okay, I’ll go to bed soon, I was just kinda happy you like talked to me and stuff.. Why for a little while..? Do you not like my boy kisses anymore, Em? Oh, okay… that’s nice? Did you cry or something? Yea, I know what you mean. He never let me touch his abs, even when we were friends, it was totes lame. Yay, I’m excited! Oh um, yea, I just meant it kinda sucks because now you have less time for boy kisses with me and other stuff… But I guess you just like the friends stuff better…

[emmettxanderson]

Okay, sweet dreams babe. You know, you can always just text me if you really miss me that much, right? Huh? No, i never said that. i really enjoy your boy kisses. We can stay like that for as long as you’d like to after... No, but I think everyone else but Avery, Valerie, and I did. Some people just don’t swing that way, man. Gotta deal with it. Me too, I’ve missed you a lot, Riles. Well, I’ll have to make time, okay? I can’t keep going without seeing my favorite person... what do you mean by friends stuff though? We do friends stuff too, you know. Considering we’re friends and all.

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

[rileylopez]

Mom said getting your beauty sleep is like super important though. Oh, only one or two? I mean, I guess we could do that… or we could like, stay in bed instead and have like a lot of them, just saying… Um, but you said you were really touching them. Wait, why not? But hs abs look like super hot, don’t you think? Yea maybe.. it still makes me sad though. Everyone is like all busy with other people, and nobody’s paying me attention and stuff… You should, Em. I don’t like it when you aren’t with me. I mean, I guess so… but it totes sucks at the same time as well, you know…

[emmettxanderson]

Then sleep an extra couple of hours tomorrow morning. Or go to bed now and we’ll talk some other time then. Maybe after we get back we can find our way to my bed and stay like that for a little while... No, like, the moment was really sweet and sentimental. Oh yea, they totally are. But Aves and i just became friends again, touching his rockin’ bod might be pushing the envelope just yet.... Well, you got me to pay attention to you. I’ll be with you this weekend, okay? It sucks? Oh. I thought you would be happy over it. You know, since now both your friends like each other again. Why does it suck exactly? 

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

[rileylopez]

A little bit, so if I’m like less hot tomorrow it will be sorta your fault. I dunno about that, it depends on whether we would also have boy kisses. Wait, you touched your friends? Oh… even Avery? Did his abs feel nice? I still haven’t gotten anywhere with Grayson, it’s totes super frustrating. Straight people make me a really sad unicorn. We should, I don’t like sleeping alone. Avery needs to understand that I like need you more.

[emmettxanderson]

Impossible, trust me. You’ll be just as gorgeous when you wake up in the morning. Well, it would mostly be about taking care of the dogs. But I’m sure we can fit in a kiss or two. What? No? Riles, they’re like my older brothers and sisters, that’s weird. And no, I didn’t, I don’t want to touch Avery’s abs. Aha, well, guess you should take the hint and let it go. Stick to other unicorns. I’m sure he does, but there’s more than enough of me to go around, okay babe? I can even come by tomorrow night and sleep there into Saturday if you want... at least I think I can. Besides, isn’t it a good thing he and I worked everything out?

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

[rileylopez]

Um okay, I’m like kinda sleepy, though… What good deed stuff did you do? Gave away your money again to help  sad homeless puppies or something? Yea, that’s cause you like, always hang out with Avery and stuff… It makes me kind of a sad puppy as well, Em..

[emmettxanderson]

Oh, I’m sorry, I’m not keeping you up am I? I don’t want to disrupt your sleep. Nah, nothing like that, though I’m going to the shelter down town to walk the dogs on Sunday if you wanna come. We just kinda helped mediate our friend’s issues and stuff. It was nice, and really touching. I’m sharing twizzlers with them now.... Oh. Sorry again, guess he’s just kinda always there now, you know? Since he started hanging out with my group of people and we made up. But you and I can totally schedule in some time to hang out! We should make it soon, too.

[emmettxanderson]

PM || Emiley

I think Avery and I just reclaimed our slots into heaven, man. We did a good deed tonight, and  wiped our slates clean of all the bad. I feel very good about myself because of it. So, I figured, what better way to end my good night than with talking to my favorite person? You know, since we haven’t talked in what feels like forever.