an idler's miscellany of compendious amusements

I'm Cupcake SinClair, the lost {princess} of France, a charming farouche, and masochistic little girl in an adult's body. I'm also a lifestyle and professional submissive at SanctuaryStudiosLAX and kinky adult performer, both on stage and on camera. Disney rejected me so now I'm a porn princess. This can be found on my ManyVids site: https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/339771/Cupcake-SinClair/ or my Clips4Sale site: http://clips4sale.com/97659 *****************************************Here I post bdsm, edge play {which can be triggering for some}, age play, petplay, and lots of kinky things mixed in with funny text posts and fandom geekery. Extremely NSFW. *********************************************The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!” ~Jack Kerouac *********************************

[haiikyuus-remade]

tumblr flagged a post of a girl eating berries so fruit is for whores now reblog if youre a fruit eating whore

[gaaraofsburbia]

[salty-red-mage]

Everyone on Tumblr rn

[mobpsycho100]

[lotusinthesun]

Lmao

[sexworkerhelpfuls]

Do you guys know about Switter? One fellow sex worker friend told me about it and I might try it

It’s less populated and it’s on the Mastadon platform which is overrun with trolls, so it’s not great, from what I’ve heard. But that’s all word of mouth and no personal experience.Anyone have experience with and/or have good things to say about Switter?

[dreagentry]

It’s been helpful as far as posting links to My cam shows and when I’ve got new photosets out, I do get some traffic out of it and Switter has a LOT more character space so more space for tags/what you want to say. 

It wasn’t exactly the easiest to get used to (esp with that PM function, I still don’t know if I’m doing that right) but I did eventually with the help of searching the FAQ and using Google. 

[annanikola-blog]

Idk how productive it is, but it’s definitely useful as a community touchstone. It’s the only social media platform I know of that has our backs.

There are a bunch of different mobile apps for accessing it too, so if one interface doesn’t suit you another might.

[abjectionrules-deactivated20200]

i post an ad once a day, every day. it’s free, so why not? i’ve gotten a handful of clients on there. probably about five since i started using it, which was about a month after it launched. those are five clients i wouldn’t have otherwise gotten, so totally worth it for me

imo the better site to join is privatedelights, i think it’s gonna be the new TER. but you could always join both and get the boost from both of them!

[cupcake-sinclair]

I’m [email protected] 🙌🏽✨

[yungkiitten]

⚠️Please read if you are a content creator or sex worker!! Adult content will no longer be allowed on tumblr starting December 17th⚠️

I do not give a fuck if this doesn’t suit your blog. Boost this so everyone can prepare and have a backup plan. This is absolute bullshit but they were never supporting us anyway.

And don’t give me “we don’t pay our taxes” because we do. Bye. Thanks for turning into shit Instagram.

[xpemblesx-deactivated20200301]

Just fuck, way to nuke yourself Tumblr. Genuinely feel abhorrence that our communities will be damaged by this. Looks like most people are migrating over to Twitter. We are as well, username on profile.  Please be aware of Twitters guidelines regarding mature content. 

- Mike 

[cupcake-sinclair]

Jesus fucking Christ…

Add me on Twitter: @ CupcakeSinClair

[understands]

[modesofexpression]

“Do you take pride in the hurt? Does it make you feel large and tragic?”

— John Steinbeck, East of Eden

[criiller]

[sense-ascendere]

In honor of Britney Spears’ birthday (December 2), I want to remind everyone that this woman was publically ostracized for struggling with the onset of mental illness, divorce, and losing custody of her children after years of media scrutiny and hypersexualization starting at the age of 17. No, she is not just a crazy woman who shaved her head. She’s the victim of an industry that loves to build a woman up before tearing her down.

[80sanime]

[itchycoil]

No offense but your friends are your soulmates too and not just people to complain about your romantic relationship to

[rai-r]

@araeuu/instagram

[michaelchallpics]

[cynicaldom]

Intent

When communicating to someone about a sensitive topic, I’ve found it’s helpful to explain why you want to talk about it. If you say you’re worried, or hurt, or just needed to get it off your chest, it can help the other person not get defensive and then more completely process what you’re saying. 

Many relationships die by a thousand little cuts. Little problems that on their surface are penny-ante. But the real offense, the hurt, is unresolved. And the little hurts pile up and the resentment builds until things fall apart.

It’s very easy for people to read a bad intent when you’re communicating a problem. Sometimes it’s a natural defense mechanism, if you think someone is just being shitty then you don’t have to really hear them. But it can just as often simply be an incorrect assumption. Communicating your intent can stop that from happening and help the conversation come to a more fruitful resolution.

But if you break it down, your intent is not just a lubricant to keep the conversation productive. Your intent is the point of the conversation. More often than not the problems we have with each other are not the real issue, it’s how those problems make us feel. When you communicate your intent, you’re fully explaining the issue that needs to be resolved.

[amysubmits]

“I’ve been missing you, could you skip your TV show tonight so we can play a video game together?” works better than “You don’t give me enough attention.” or “you watch too much TV.”

Or “I suspect it’s just my anxiety, but I’m worried that you’re angry with me because you’ve been kind of quiet.” is better than just “Why are you so distant?”

For years I worried that we couldn’t discuss problems because it would cause a fight. That was how the world I lived in as a kid worked. Having a partner who is open to hearing you is huge, but choice of wording helps even when you have a partner who wants to hear you. 

[jumpingjacktrash]

very good advice. it really helps when you give the other person something actionable. a request, a suggestion, an offer to brainstorm. don’t complain; troubleshoot.

you don’t have to be emotionless or conciliatory. it’s ok to express anger. just be mature about it, and respect the other person. don’t go on a power trip, don’t leverage your legitimate gripes to make them grovel. keep your eyes on the prize. if you don’t know what the prize is, the next step is to tell them so and invite them to help you figure it out, not to moan until they miraculously do the right thing at random. even when you’re super upset you can still apply these skills.

wrong: “this place is a damn landfill because nobody but me does any housework!”

right: “there is some serious housekeeping fail going on around here. it’s kinda driving me bugfuck. i want to sit down and take a look at how we do the housework, because how we’re doing it right now sucks.”

see how the second one doesn’t blame? blame’s not important. responsibility is important, but that has to be worked out calmly or it’s not going to be functional. the first person is picking a fight; the second person is trying to solve a problem. you’ll notice they’re not smoothing ruffled feathers or acting apologetic, they’re clearly quite annoyed. but they’re aiming their anger at the situation, not the person.

even if they are angry with their housemate, working those feelings out is beyond the scope of the conversation. trying to combine venting with chore planning is, imo, the number one cause of screaming kitchen fights on planet earth.

[princess-pupcake-deactivated201]

Troubleshoot; brainstorm; problem solve

[holly-gonightly]

@schoolsafetypatrol and me. photo by @tdgpresents

[holly-gonightly]

@schoolsafetypatrol and me. photo by @tdgpresents

[cherishedproperty]

Tell Me Why

One of the things that fascinates me about this community is how people can be drawn to the same act for so many different reasons. Fetishes, sex positions, rules and protocol… It’s so easy sometimes to match up a list of fetishes and think you’re on the same page as someone. But that only gets you halfway. Maybe. And it’s because the reasons are what matters, not the act itself.

I dated a man once who confessed his interest in tail plugs. It wasn’t something I’d ever considered before, but I was open to it. Especially in the context of this relationship, I assumed it was a humiliation thing. He liked to make me beg for things I didn’t want, then show me how wet it made me. I assumed the tail plug stemmed from the same desires. It made sense to me. He wanted a tail holding my ass open while I crawled for him. He wanted me low.

But I was wrong. That wasn’t his vision at all. For him, there was a softness to it. He wanted me to curl up against him while he caressed me—down my back and over my tail and my thighs. The tail unlocked a different kind of connection for us. It was not the mind fuck game we usually played. It was free of all that. Innocent and light. Vulnerable and tender. It gave him the freedom to touch me absentmindedly without words or expectations. It was so much deeper that I ever expected.

It’s rarely the act itself; it’s what we feel and where it takes us. It’s how we access new parts of ourselves and each other. It’s how we learn who we are at the core of our being. It’s how we grow and discover together. At the core of every act that drives us, there is meaning. The meaning is what connects us and allows us to feel truly seen—but only if it’s shared.

So you have to tell me why. Why do you like it? What is it that speaks to you? Is it that moment right before? Is it the way my cheeks blush as I obey? Is it the way I feel after, soft and sweet curled in your arms?  Where do you feel it? In your heart? In your groin? Somewhere deep in your bones? Tell me what it means to you and where it touches you. That will tell me more than any fetish list ever could. 

[missmiffle]

This is also something that I think about a lot too, which is why I often ask so many questions. I’m fascinated by the whys.