Full name: “This is really happening? You want to interview me? Damn, alright. Who am I to rob your viewers of all..” [Ezra motions to himself seductively] “..this. The name’s Ezra. Ezra Robert Jameson. I don’t think I was named after anyone in particular. My mom liked the name Ezra, my dad liked to make my mom happy.. and there you have it.”
Nicknames: “Most people call me Ezra..” [He stops, and gives the camera a wink] “My boyfriend calls me his Greek God, among other things, and the girlfriend? Well.. She likes to call me Pinkie, it’s a long story.”
Date of birth: “I was born on September 25th and since that fateful date, I have blessed this earth with my winning personality and handsome looks. You’re welcome.” [He winks again]
Hometown: “Brooklyn, baby.. born and raised.”
Sexuality: “Heterosexual.”
Occupation: “I bar tend mostly, I make drinks worthy of the God’s.. ask anyone. I’m passing down my wisdom to Alex right now.. a little mentor, mentee relationship. It’s pretty hot, I gotta tell ‘ya.” [Ezra laughs] “I was a Computer Science student at NYU but I dropped out, who needs that type of shit in their life, am I right? If I ever want to go back, I’ve only got a few exams left before I can graduate.”
RELATIONSHIPS
What is your relationship with your parents like? “Great, my relationship with the old folks is amazing. I used visit them with Alex every weekend, now we switch every week between ‘em, usually Saturdays. Mom cooks, Dad give Alex and I talks. They’re amazing people and I’m one lucky son of a bitch for having them in my life. I gotta admit, I’m a little pissed at my mom for leaving dad and shacking up with the devil’s father but if she’s happy... I can try and be happy for her. They raised me, they took in Alex.. they’re great.” [Ezra blows a kiss to the camera] I love ‘ya Mom and Dad”
Do you have any siblings? If so, what is your relationship with them? If not, what member of your family are you closest to? [Ezra rolls his eyes, he lets out a groan] “Do step-siblings count?
What is your relationship status? “I’m happy, I’m content where I am right now, you don’t have to worry about that.”
Have you ever been in love? “Yeah, I think so.. I’ve got an ex who I was pretty fucking in deep with. I don’t know what happened honestly, one day she was in and the next she was out. I know I got mad love for O and Alex, for sure. No one could ever take that away from me when it comes to them, they’re everything.”
Do you miss anyone? “Naw, not really.”
Top 3 best friends: “Alexander, O, and Caitlin.. my main squeezes.” [blows another kiss towards the camera]
Do you have any enemies: “Fuck Nate Hunt.” [Ezra fake gags towards the camera]
Biggest fear? “I guess my biggest fear would be disappointing the ones I love.. mostly O and Alex. They’re my family, I wouldn’t ever want to do anything to mess that up or change the way they look at me.”
Do you have any regrets? “Regrets are a waste of time. Life is short. Drive fast. Leave a sexy corpse.”
What are your hobbies? “Sleeping? Drinking? Being awesome? I like video games, I like running. I don’t know.. as long as I’m doing it with friends, I’m down to do anything.”
Likes/dislikes? “Likes.. Alexander, O, beer, boobs and boats. Dislikes.. Nate Hunt.”
What are your hopes, dreams and plans for the future? “I just wanna be happy, man. I know it sounds cliche but what else could I really want?”
Devon blinked at the request, but managed to relax into a smile when he realized that there wasn’t any anger pointed towards him. “Uh, I don’t know about the whole tray..? I don’t think I’m allowed to do that, it was an expensive bottle,” he explained in a nervous ramble.
“WHO’S GONNA KNOW? YOUR BOSS will just assume you gave ‘em to their rightful owners and these people?” Ezra motioned to the hoards of drunk, rich New Yorkers behind him. “They won’t even now the difference. I do this all the time, trust me. My best friend puts on events like this.. you might know her actually. Caitlin?”
“dude… i swear i’m gonna get reincarnated into a mother fuckin’ sea turtle and ride that mother fuckin’ east australian current like they do in ‘finding nemo’. fuck, those turtles were legit. oh, oh–– but you know what would be super fuckin’ awesome, too? being a lion… like literally you’d be the k i n g of the pride lands. shit, bro. what else, dude? we gotta keep a list goin’.”
“NAW, BEING A LION WOULD INVOLVE TOO MUCH PRESSURE. Who wants to be in charge of all the pride lands? Shit, I don’t even want to get out of bed most mornings, imagine the ruler I’d be.. I’d like to be a dog though. Dogs are fucking cute, you know? And look at all the bitches dogs get. Hot girls love dogs. I’d have a front row seat to the best cleavage in NY.”
Now that is really something. I’m kinda jealous about what you guys have. Not the if you fuck a girl I fuck a girl thing, but the connected thing. Soulmate is a better word for what you have than boyfriend for sure, but I’m all clear. But you don’t have to work for it if I am willing to just give it to you. I mean you can work for it, I won’t say no, but still…
WHAT KIND OF WORK ARE WE TALKING about here, Luna? You want me to strip for ‘ya? Clean your house in a little french maid outfit? Stand outside your store and lure customers in with my amazing charm and undeniable wit?
“WHICH PART OF EM? THE TILL DEATH DO US PART, Or the part where I promised that I’d always share my chicken wings and beer with you? Changed locks? This is all the she-devil’s idea isn’t it? I keep telling you that you should break up with her. She’s plotting my down fall I can feel it. –– –– New shaving cream actually, between you and me I think Harry Potter made it. I feel like a brand new man after using it.”
“I ASKED YOU NOT TO CALL CAIT THAT, DIDN’T I? You’ve got to be a little nicer to her. It’s not like I dig the idea of you hanging out with that emo girl who never speaks to be unless she’s threatening to kill me.. but you just seem to do it. Can’t you give Cait the same respect I give Mia.. which is very little, hardly any, just don’t look her in the eyes basically. If I die, It was Mia.. or my idiot step-brother... or his idiot girlfriend, the one you tutor.. shit, there are more people who want to kill me then I thought, never mind.”
“Most days, actually. But uh, thanks? I’m flustered because it’s me, you caught me off guard. You could have just texted me – or not, because I guess you’ve been doing that… right. I’m the least cool person in the entirety of this city, and you expect me to be cool? We were, we still can be I guess.”
“OH BABY, STOP OR I’LL GET SENTIMENTAL ON YOU. And we both know how much I hate crying. —— But that’s an easy question to answer, you begin where I do and we end the same way too. Always together, till death do us part. It’s in our marriage vows after all.”
“REMIND ME OF OUR MARRIAGE VOWS, I WANNA see if you remember them as well as I do... yes, this is a test and if you fail.. let’s just say the locks will be changed ------ Hey, did you get a haircut? You look different, babe.. a tan, maybe?”
I never know who is actually dating versus just fucking around or just fucking, or hell even just co-habitating with one another. So I try not to assume, it keeps me out of trouble sometimes. Plus there are various definitions of dating I’ve heard and the way you too interact, with O, thrown in there too, it fits like 85 of them. I could never forget you! He was working for the food, in my defense, so it was like a paycheck. You know I’ll give you pizza whenever you want, on the house.
FORGET WHAT YOU HEARD AND REMEMBER THIS, me and Alex? We are what you would call connected by our hearts. We live and breathe the same life. If he dies, I die. If he fucks a girl, I fuck a girl.. does that help the definition, blondie? I don’t know how else to make it clear to everyone.. Alex is my soulmate. Don’t even get me started on O.. that’s a story for another day. I could work for the pizza too, hell if I knew I could be working for pizza all this time.. I feel cheated.
Oh I’m harmless and isn’t your boyfriend well roommate or maybe boyfriend, Alex? If so he wouldn’t have issue, I kept him fed for months and still do whenever he wants free pizza. But just in case he has that side I don’t know about, I’ll be quiet about it.
ALEX IS MY ROOMMATE/BOYFRIEND/LIFE PARTNER.. maybe boyfriend? What’s maybe about it? We’ve been dating for years. You gave Alex pizza and forgot about me? Luna... how could you?
“OH I DON’T COUNT WHEN YOU’RE AROUND. That’s okay though I’ve learned to live with it. I happily award you the top spot, on any list with beautiful people on it. And if you aren’t there I’d protest. —— Pick up lines is that what we are doing today? All right… well has anyone ever asked you if you’re from Tennessee because babe you’re the only ten I see.”
STOP IT, I’M GONNA CRY. Have I told you yet today how much I love you? My love for you runs deep, Alex. So deep I don’t know where it ends and I begin.
DON’T SAY THAT TOO LOUD, blondie. My boyfriend may here you and he’s not too keen on beautiful people calling his boyfriend handsome. He gets jealous, I’m trying to get him to work on it.
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